Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is an interesting conversation because many (not all) women want men who are equal or higher than them in some way. Financially, intellectually, socially, and/or physically.

If a woman is a white collar professional, is she automatically going to want the same in a mate? Or, will the blue collar business owner be enough? The unfortunate side effect is that we’ll have more women looking at a smaller pool of men.

Lawyer here. I did end up marrying another lawyer. I would have been happy with anyone equally successful—so blue collar business owner would have been great. Being with another lawyer who understands the unique demands of the job has been good though.

A friend who is a doctor has resented her teacher DH because she has carried virtually all of the financial weight. She was glad when he was available to care for the kids in summers though (if being in the house with the kids while he spends the day gaming counts as “care”).

Men traditionally have had to carry “virtually all of the financial weight.” Why is it so awful for the roles to switch and women take on breadwinner role?

Because women who carry the financial weight end up doing most of the domestic labor as well.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is an interesting conversation because many (not all) women want men who are equal or higher than them in some way. Financially, intellectually, socially, and/or physically.

If a woman is a white collar professional, is she automatically going to want the same in a mate? Or, will the blue collar business owner be enough? The unfortunate side effect is that we’ll have more women looking at a smaller pool of men.

Lawyer here. I did end up marrying another lawyer. I would have been happy with anyone equally successful—so blue collar business owner would have been great. Being with another lawyer who understands the unique demands of the job has been good though.

A friend who is a doctor has resented her teacher DH because she has carried virtually all of the financial weight. She was glad when he was available to care for the kids in summers though (if being in the house with the kids while he spends the day gaming counts as “care”).

Men traditionally have had to carry “virtually all of the financial weight.” Why is it so awful for the roles to switch and women take on breadwinner role?

Anonymous wrote:We need more stay at home dads and a society that accepts them.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In my community, men and women both get STEM degrees and get high salaries. Older generation support young families in material and emotional ways. I am not seeing a decline in marriages or births. Though more than 2 children is not common in our community.

Just say your "community" – we know you're not talking about a neighborhood.

They’re talking about communities that work hard, value education, and take tough stem majors. Like math, engineering, premed/med.

Other communities see woman taking more “pink” majors like marketing, nursing, education, communication, studies. Those have less high paying career tracks than stem majors or law/med/mba graduate programs.

The so-called “pink” majors have less high paying career tracks BECAUSE they are dominated by women. There is nothing inherently tougher about computer programming than nursing, for example. If a bunch of men decided to take over nursing schools en masse, watch those salaries skyrocket.

Not true. As everything in capitalism it’s about the money. How much money does a degree generate for the corporate world? Nursing vs programming for example

Bullshit. Healthcare in the United States is a for profit system. Plenty of middle men (and I do mean men) have found ways to generate substantial profit off of the sick and dying. But the women who actually do the work and provide the care make peanuts.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In my community, men and women both get STEM degrees and get high salaries. Older generation support young families in material and emotional ways. I am not seeing a decline in marriages or births. Though more than 2 children is not common in our community.

Just say your "community" – we know you're not talking about a neighborhood.

They’re talking about communities that work hard, value education, and take tough stem majors. Like math, engineering, premed/med.

Other communities see woman taking more “pink” majors like marketing, nursing, education, communication, studies. Those have less high paying career tracks than stem majors or law/med/mba graduate programs.

The so-called “pink” majors have less high paying career tracks BECAUSE they are dominated by women. There is nothing inherently tougher about computer programming than nursing, for example. If a bunch of men decided to take over nursing schools en masse, watch those salaries skyrocket.

Not true. As everything in capitalism it’s about the money. How much money does a degree generate for the corporate world? Nursing vs programming for example

Bullshit. Healthcare in the United States is a for profit system. Plenty of middle men (and I do mean men) have found ways to generate substantial profit off of the sick and dying. But the women who actually do the work and provide the care make peanuts.

You realize you just confirmed my point? It’s the money generating ones who are paid more. I never said the whole healthcare field wasn’t profitable.
If you look at education, there’s less money to be made in general, so only the top ones get good salaries.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most men still make more money, even if they didn't go to college.

My brother never finished college, still makes more money than his wife with a master's degree and makes more money than I do with a college degree as well.

Lots of degreed teachers and nurses marry police officers and firemen and guys in the trades.

There is only a real issue when women are making a lot of money, or come from a family with a lot of money, and men are intimidated.

Those are anomalies.

You know, it’s an anomaly, going to college.

Still only 30% of people go to college.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is an interesting conversation because many (not all) women want men who are equal or higher than them in some way. Financially, intellectually, socially, and/or physically.

If a woman is a white collar professional, is she automatically going to want the same in a mate? Or, will the blue collar business owner be enough? The unfortunate side effect is that we’ll have more women looking at a smaller pool of men.

Lawyer here. I did end up marrying another lawyer. I would have been happy with anyone equally successful—so blue collar business owner would have been great. Being with another lawyer who understands the unique demands of the job has been good though.

A friend who is a doctor has resented her teacher DH because she has carried virtually all of the financial weight. She was glad when he was available to care for the kids in summers though (if being in the house with the kids while he spends the day gaming counts as “care”).

Anonymous wrote:This is an interesting conversation because many (not all) women want men who are equal or higher than them in some way. Financially, intellectually, socially, and/or physically.

If a woman is a white collar professional, is she automatically going to want the same in a mate? Or, will the blue collar business owner be enough? The unfortunate side effect is that we’ll have more women looking at a smaller pool of men.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another friend just announced her solo pregnancy. That's the 3rd one so far in 2025. None of them are married or even dating anyone. All chose the artificial insemination/IVF routes.

Good for them, I say. I love a self-sufficient queen.

+ 1

Most of us end up having to be a self sufficient queen anyway.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Gender discussion aside, college degrees are quickly becoming worthless.

If everyone can and does get one, then they aren't worth a thing anymore.

Blame diploma mill colleges, who simply hand out degrees to anyone with the money.

Blame government student loan scams, for giving everyone a load to give to the colleges.

It's all a money laundering operation these days.

Awhile back I listened to a radio show where the far right leaning white man who supported Project 25 was talking about how college degrees were worthless. Apparently since men weren’t pursuing them so much as in the past and now more women than men were getting degrees, the only explanation was that degrees didn’t have much value. They are only worth something if men think they’re worth pursuing. It was an interesting spin.

Anonymous wrote:It isn’t just about finding a financial equal but an intellectual equal.

Anonymous wrote:I think the issue is more likely to be driven by men not comfortable “marrying up” vs women refusing to marry men who earn less.

And maybe this will be good for family balance issues with more women as key breadwinner roles.