Why did you breed with a jersey who doesn't look after his kids?

That was your first mistake.

Now, of course that you are roped into this parenting gig for life, it's ok to not do sports or anything you cannot afford. Have the conversation with your kids though. There might be scholarships and ways your kid can get to and from without you. Don't give a flat "no". Give an "I can't afford it/take you. What are the options?"

The most important thing is that your child not be sedentary. If they enter middle school with low body fat, lots of muscle, and outstanding
cardio, they can do any sport. Keep them off the screens and processed foods and do a lot of cardio, sit ups, pushups, etc at home. Make sure they can run a few miles at a fast pace. Keep them outside on bikes and running around for hours a day. They don’t need travel soccer to be fit.

My kid who loves sports always finds a way to play even if not enrolled in a football program. At recess, at afterschool, summer camp, with friends at the playground. My husband was the same- he never had access to formal team sports for reasons similar to yours but nevertheless has been playing sports his whole life. Don't stress!

Anonymous wrote:Solo parent here (ex takes kid every other weekend and doesn’t help beyond that). Obviously if you can’t make it work financially you can’t but you need to try your best. Only you know what that looks like. If your ex takes them 50/50 I’m not really seeing an excuse here unless you truly can’t swing it financially. That said, I pay 50 a season for rec soccer, so maybe you need to take a hard look at your budget and do less Starbucks and more concern for your kids.

Wow that's obnoxious.

OP said her ex has the kids every weekend and won't take them to sports. So when are the kids going to games/meets?

OP, you're fine. Swim is great. Starting something older is fine. Rec programs are good if you can make them work, but so is taking them to the park to kick a ball around.

Solo parent here (ex takes kid every other weekend and doesn’t help beyond that). Obviously if you can’t make it work financially you can’t but you need to try your best. Only you know what that looks like. If your ex takes them 50/50 I’m not really seeing an excuse here unless you truly can’t swing it financially. That said, I pay 50 a season for rec soccer, so maybe you need to take a hard look at your budget and do less Starbucks and more concern for your kids.

Anonymous wrote:I'm confused, you have 50-50 and dad has the kids a lot. Talk to him. Are you getting child support? If yes, some of that money is dad's portion as he also has a lot of expenses and the same as you in his home.

Doing some lessons will not lead to team as most kids start team between 5-7. Team is 3-7 days a week.

Sports are the man’s job. Make him do it with the kids.

OP, if the kids are interested, and are elementary school age, you might want to check out your local govt parks and rec department offerings.
In DC, for instance, DPR offers soccer, basketball and tennis programs for kids, for rather modest fees.
Maybe if they start with such low cost, low commitment options, you can try it out and see how the kids like it and how it works for you.
Good luck.

Anonymous wrote:Kids around here start sports before kindergarten. That's not to say you can't join at anytime but if your child really wants to do a sport the sooner the better. Not only will their skills further develop, but they may realize they don't like it at all and I would rather find that out in second grade than as a junior.

Have you seen a bunch of kindergartners “play” soccer lately? It’s completely unnecessary if you decide to skip the early years. Starting to learn a sport at 4th or 5th grade is fine. Kids who start at that age quickly catch up to kids who started earlier.

The early years can be spent on playgrounds, in water, in camps, riding bikes, playing fun games with balls and other equipment with family or friends. This will prepare kids for sports as much or more than a bunch of five year olds kicking at the same ball.

Kids around here start sports before kindergarten. That's not to say you can't join at anytime but if your child really wants to do a sport the sooner the better. Not only will their skills further develop, but they may realize they don't like it at all and I would rather find that out in second grade than as a junior.

I would really try to find kids who do sports that your child wants to and set up a carpool or maybe offer to pay for gas if you're not able to actually do the car pooling. That's what I did for a few months. All my husband was unable to help with transportation and two kids needed to be in different directions at the same time.