Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband was killed by a drunk driver on his way home from work one day. Two of my kids were too young to have any memory of him. I try to have grace when I hear about this highly preventable crime but it is very, very difficult.

+1

Drunk drivers have taken multiple people from my family, including my aunt, a mother of 6. They’ve destroyed my body. PP, I am so sorry for your loss. Like you, I try to give grace, but find it hard to see this post. I hope the parents are not only seeking legal help but taking this with the gravity merited, and that they see to it that if their daughter escapes legal consequences, she gets whatever intervention is necessary to never do this again.

Nothing either of you wrote means the person who committed a crime should not be adequately represented in court. That's all OP asked for.

Yes they should be "represented in court". But they should not be allowed to plead Not Guilty or get off for "good behavior". Their actions changed someone's life for the worse or "could have changed someone's life for the worse". And as someone stated, nobody gets a DUI their first time---majority of DUI drivers have issues with alcohol and have done it many times before.
In fact, many DUI drivers are Repeat offenders. So all the more reason we should NOT go light on the punishment the first time they are caught.

Not allowed to plead "not guilty"? I mean look I'm harsh on DUIs too, but I don't think you know how the criminal justice system works.

https://jezicfirm.com/ This firm was recommended to us by a public defender in MC and my DD retained them. Her case was dismissed, as it should have been. Can't recommend them enough.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband was killed by a drunk driver on his way home from work one day. Two of my kids were too young to have any memory of him. I try to have grace when I hear about this highly preventable crime but it is very, very difficult.

+1

Drunk drivers have taken multiple people from my family, including my aunt, a mother of 6. They’ve destroyed my body. PP, I am so sorry for your loss. Like you, I try to give grace, but find it hard to see this post. I hope the parents are not only seeking legal help but taking this with the gravity merited, and that they see to it that if their daughter escapes legal consequences, she gets whatever intervention is necessary to never do this again.

Nothing either of you wrote means the person who committed a crime should not be adequately represented in court. That's all OP asked for.

Yes they should be "represented in court". But they should not be allowed to plead Not Guilty or get off for "good behavior". Their actions changed someone's life for the worse or "could have changed someone's life for the worse". And as someone stated, nobody gets a DUI their first time---majority of DUI drivers have issues with alcohol and have done it many times before.
In fact, many DUI drivers are Repeat offenders. So all the more reason we should NOT go light on the punishment the first time they are caught.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband was killed by a drunk driver on his way home from work one day. Two of my kids were too young to have any memory of him. I try to have grace when I hear about this highly preventable crime but it is very, very difficult.

There is no reason for anyone to have "Grace" for this, but especially you! It's a preventable crime, rides are easily avaialable nowadays, there simply is no excuse.

OMG, you're insufferable.

Anonymous wrote:My husband was killed by a drunk driver on his way home from work one day. Two of my kids were too young to have any memory of him. I try to have grace when I hear about this highly preventable crime but it is very, very difficult.

There is no reason for anyone to have "Grace" for this, but especially you! It's a preventable crime, rides are easily avaialable nowadays, there simply is no excuse.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) every single one of you would try to help your kid if they did this. So lay off your high horses please.

2) I doubt she will get jail time but that’s what a good lawyer is for.

Agree with this poster. OPs daughter made a mistake, and OP is trying to help. We've all made mistakes to varying degrees, we can all hope this young adult has earned their lesson.

No judgement from me OP - and good luck

From me too OP. There before the grace of god. I can't tell you the number of stupid things I did before I turned 23.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do think that in this day and age with all the messaging about dui and all the ride share options, that someone who still chooses to drink and drive should lose their license. They do not have the maturity or sense of responsibility to drink responsibly. Since you can’t stop them from drinking, then the goal should be to make it as hard as possible for them to drive and to come down hard when they do.

While anyone charged with any offence has a right to legal help and should access that, the goal should not be to minimize consequences.

Do you even know what lawyers do?

OP, I'm sorry. I know this must be hard and worrying. I hope you find a good lawyer and your daughter learns a valuable lesson, if for nothing else but for her own safety. And ignore most of these sanctimonious posters. They either have super young kids or are clueless about what their kids actually do. Teens do dumb things. Their teens are no better.

I have a 25 and 20 yo. The 25yo has ADHD, impulse control issues, and yet neither has ever driven while drinking/drunk. Neither has ever done anything illegal (beyond drinking underaged at college parties, where you walk to/from). Not every teen does dumb things that are so dangerous and impact others. Neither have any of their friends from HS. And if you have a teen who seems inclined to do shi$ like that, it's your job as a parent to keep them under control (yes, it's harder than some other parents have it, but do your job).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why should it be expunged?

It is a serious offense.

Consequences teach valuable lessons.

She’s 19 she could literally have blown a .000001 and it’s DUI.

My oldest (99th percentile IQ, AAP, attending selective university, planning to attend t14 law school) would have never done something like this. It's sickening to think unstable individuals such as this poster's daughter are allowed to roam free. Before the mob attacks: no, I am not religious, no I am not kidding, no I am not uptight.

I agree! I have an ADHD, impulsive, Boy. And even he wouldn't do anything like that (and never did). He had friends who drank in HS (he did not, and didn't go to parties with those friends), yet not a single one of them ever drove while drinking. They stayed where they were or called a sober friend/parent for a ride or Ubered home.

My kid knows, if you are drinking/partying, you get a ride. He's now a flown adult (26) He knows if you go out to dinner, you can have one drink, but then you need to spend 2+ hours at dinner/walking around before you get back in your car. If you want to drink more, you uber home and come back to get the car the next day.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) every single one of you would try to help your kid if they did this. So lay off your high horses please.

2) I doubt she will get jail time but that’s what a good lawyer is for.

"Help your kid" has different meanings to different people. Daddy bailing her out is not what I have in mind.

If my teen got a DUI I would "help" them by sending them to rehab and doing everything I could to make sure that they don't drive for the foreseeable future. I would expect them to suffer some consequences that hopefully will teach a lifelong lesson.

Oh please. I love it when DCUM posters get all hysterical for no reason. She asked for a layer recommendation. You have no idea what else they’re doing or not doing. A DUI at 19 does not equal a necessary trip to rehab. Not that you or anyone else could make an adult do that. Calm down.

No, you calm down. A 19 yo who drives drunk has done TWO illegal things---DUI and drinking underage. If my teen is living at home/I'm paying for college/I'm paying for anything for them, they will have to then follow my house rules for doing something illegal, dangerous and stupid. My kid would be in rehab/therapy to address their need to drink, they would also be in intensive therapy to help understand why they drove when drinking, as we live in an area where Uber/Lyft are readily avaialbe and we as parents will always pay for that (sort of like how we would always pick them up in MS/HS from a party/friends place/anywhere they were uncomfortable)

The 19yo could have KILLED someone. Next time they might, so I'd be doing everything to insure that next time never happens

DO you have an actual lawyer recommendation? That is all OP asked for.

OP is an idiot. Posting on DCUM asking for a lawyer? It's a troll who wanted to stir things up. It must be a slow day in troll land.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) every single one of you would try to help your kid if they did this. So lay off your high horses please.

2) I doubt she will get jail time but that’s what a good lawyer is for.

"Help your kid" has different meanings to different people. Daddy bailing her out is not what I have in mind.

If my teen got a DUI I would "help" them by sending them to rehab and doing everything I could to make sure that they don't drive for the foreseeable future. I would expect them to suffer some consequences that hopefully will teach a lifelong lesson.

My dad always told me if I got myself in jail, he wouldn’t bail me out. The kid in the article above didn’t even get the option. The judge gave him no bail. In jail since the morning of the accident.

My dad said the same thing. His brother - my uncle - was killed in a hit and run and nothing ever happened to the driver. (This was decades ago. No idea if they were drunk since they didn’t turn themselves in for days.) My uncle left behind three little boys who missed out on having a dad their entire lives. Drunk driving is not a little thing and, with mass transit, Uber, Lyft and cabs, a totally unecessary thing. If you can afford an attorney, you could afford the Uber. Get your kid into rehab for real and take away the car keys. The life he saves may be his own.

I was hit by a drunk driver on the beltway when a teen. He was driving the wrong way. I was incredibly fortunate to walk away and have no idea how I did. The driver behind me was not fortunate. I watched them trying to extricate him. I have from the time my kids were preschoolers openly discussed the dangers of drinking and driving. They know the risks. I have told them I won’t bail them out. But the reality is that kids are often immature and do stupid things and I don’t blame a parent for wanting a good lawyer. However, I would require my child to seek treatment (even if they claimed they didn’t have a drinking problem) and I would take away the car. I would never again allow my child to drive my car/insure them. I wouldn’t want to assume the risk of my child being a repeat offender.

This 1000%

Majority of us have taught our kids not to drink and drive. That it's dangerous and wrong. We give them the ability to Uber/Lyft/Public transit. Yes kids do stupid things, but the best thing you as a parent can do when that happens is let them deal with the realistic consequences. So while I might step in to minimize the legal actions (for their future), I myself (along with their dad) would impose punishments equal to or greater than the legal ones. They would be in therapy/rehab, they would have to pay for their own insurance, no more being on our insurance, but in reality, I wouldn't allow them to drive/have a car for at least a year (simple to do even if over 18---if you want us to pay for the lawyer, rehab, college, future financial assistance, you will follow our rules for dealing with this---if not, you are out of the house, on your own for everything ). Let them suffer the consequences and realize just how difficult life can be if you cannot drive anywhere, if your auto insurance is now $6K/year, etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) every single one of you would try to help your kid if they did this. So lay off your high horses please.

2) I doubt she will get jail time but that’s what a good lawyer is for.

"Help your kid" has different meanings to different people. Daddy bailing her out is not what I have in mind.

If my teen got a DUI I would "help" them by sending them to rehab and doing everything I could to make sure that they don't drive for the foreseeable future. I would expect them to suffer some consequences that hopefully will teach a lifelong lesson.

Oh please. I love it when DCUM posters get all hysterical for no reason. She asked for a layer recommendation. You have no idea what else they’re doing or not doing. A DUI at 19 does not equal a necessary trip to rehab. Not that you or anyone else could make an adult do that. Calm down.

No, you calm down. A 19 yo who drives drunk has done TWO illegal things---DUI and drinking underage. If my teen is living at home/I'm paying for college/I'm paying for anything for them, they will have to then follow my house rules for doing something illegal, dangerous and stupid. My kid would be in rehab/therapy to address their need to drink, they would also be in intensive therapy to help understand why they drove when drinking, as we live in an area where Uber/Lyft are readily avaialbe and we as parents will always pay for that (sort of like how we would always pick them up in MS/HS from a party/friends place/anywhere they were uncomfortable)

The 19yo could have KILLED someone. Next time they might, so I'd be doing everything to insure that next time never happens

What does your word salad have to do with a lawyer rec? That is what OP asked for. Your judgment was not solicited, isn't relevant, and didn't need to be shared.

I hope she learned her lesson. I'm glad no one died because of her stupidity.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why should it be expunged?

It is a serious offense.

Consequences teach valuable lessons.

She’s 19 she could literally have blown a .000001 and it’s DUI.

ANd she's 19, and should know if you choose to drink (it's illegal at that age) you can loose your license for driving (and also you could injure or kill someone). So yes, it's stupid and dangerous. My kids and all of their friends have never done that---because they know it's dumb and dangerous. If they drink, they call an Uber/Lyft. My own kid does that at college---they are underage, if you pre drink and then go to a bar that allows 18+ in (you can't drink there), they always uber. Despite most of them having cars. Because they know you don't drink and drive.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1) every single one of you would try to help your kid if they did this. So lay off your high horses please.

2) I doubt she will get jail time but that’s what a good lawyer is for.

"Help your kid" has different meanings to different people. Daddy bailing her out is not what I have in mind.

If my teen got a DUI I would "help" them by sending them to rehab and doing everything I could to make sure that they don't drive for the foreseeable future. I would expect them to suffer some consequences that hopefully will teach a lifelong lesson.

Oh please. I love it when DCUM posters get all hysterical for no reason. She asked for a layer recommendation. You have no idea what else they’re doing or not doing. A DUI at 19 does not equal a necessary trip to rehab. Not that you or anyone else could make an adult do that. Calm down.

No, you calm down. A 19 yo who drives drunk has done TWO illegal things---DUI and drinking underage. If my teen is living at home/I'm paying for college/I'm paying for anything for them, they will have to then follow my house rules for doing something illegal, dangerous and stupid. My kid would be in rehab/therapy to address their need to drink, they would also be in intensive therapy to help understand why they drove when drinking, as we live in an area where Uber/Lyft are readily avaialbe and we as parents will always pay for that (sort of like how we would always pick them up in MS/HS from a party/friends place/anywhere they were uncomfortable)

The 19yo could have KILLED someone. Next time they might, so I'd be doing everything to insure that next time never happens

DO you have an actual lawyer recommendation? That is all OP asked for.

Anonymous wrote:Why should it be expunged?

It is a serious offense.

Consequences teach valuable lessons.

Because it's one instance. If no one was hurt, this is going to be a significant deterrent to most people. We don't have to go for the jugular for EVERYTHING. Jesus.