Anonymous
Post 12/02/2024 14:49     Subject: Does anyone actually care where someone, other than their child, goes to college?
I want to say no, but considering how many judged our child's choice, I am not sure that's accurate.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2024 14:47     Subject: Does anyone actually care where someone, other than their child, goes to college?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Of course people care. Almost everyone cares and is impressed by names of smart-kid schools. The reaction was the same everywhere when I graduated my T10 years ago. The name causes people to assume you are smart. It is a very predictable reaction and happened at every level of job seeking and meeting fellow parents at the preschool and up. The name should not matter as much but it does. In my job more than half of the leaders went to ivy/elite names so no one cares anymore because everyone treats each other the same at this level. When we hire we try not to care but it comes up sometimes.


Agree with this. But what's annoying is that so many of the kids, that I know of at least, are getting into top schools because of athletics. And some of these kids are no smarter than anyone else.


Typical DCUM 🙄

You think that kid is a dumb athlete who doesn’t deserve it but chances are you don’t actually know their grades or rigor, and of course you are ignoring how hard they worked at their sport, which the college values even if you don’t.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2024 14:32     Subject: Does anyone actually care where someone, other than their child, goes to college?
Do friend groups really try to stay together for college? That would be the only reason to care. Can’t imagine that would be easy though.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2024 14:28     Subject: Does anyone actually care where someone, other than their child, goes to college?
I like to see my kid's friends get into schools they really like.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2024 14:26     Subject: Does anyone actually care where someone, other than their child, goes to college?
Yes, I enjoy flexing my family’s multiple Harvard degrees on all the DMV strivers who start conversations with “where did you/larlo/larla go to school?”
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2024 14:26     Subject: Does anyone actually care where someone, other than their child, goes to college?
I don’t. I don’t care which of the 10 colleges my kid applied to he attends. I only care that he graduates.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2024 14:24     Subject: Does anyone actually care where someone, other than their child, goes to college?
Anonymous wrote:I don't care but some people use it as a pathetic measuring stick to show how great everything is going for them.

This
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2024 14:20     Subject: Does anyone actually care where someone, other than their child, goes to college?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think that society and the workplace need to change when it comes to this: Excellent students now pick in-state or lesser-known schools simply because of tuition costs. It doesn't mean they are less deserving. But it's still very much 45+yos hiring and that segment had it easier and cheaper so they do not all get it.


Ivy was far cheaper than UVA in state for ours, and a little cheaper than the T16-20 ranked privates that gave DC aid. We get need based aid and ivies are a great deal. It is less than 25k per year for us. UVA gave us only a small amount of beed based aid.


That's great but you knew that wasn't what I meant. A lot of kids are in that limbo of not qualifying for a lot or any aid and not having wealthy parents.


Nope not buying it is “not having wealthy parents” when ivies give need aid to families with HHI in the low to mid 200s. Come off it that’s rich . Ok so 250-260+ is about the lowest HHI that can get some aid. So what?? That’s easily full pay level for one kid, and for many if you have half a brain and saved 20k each year for some years. And yes DMV and people like us in that range (upper 200s) are full pay and fine. Not poor. Not in limbo. We are rich. We just spend it on an ivy education because we know what the name of an elite college can do and we know the difference in education


You sound quite angry about this.

Can you fix the Ivy school financial aid calculators then? I filled them out, and they all said they would give us no aid. But we earn very little. If I withdrew money from my 401K, I'd have to pay 10% to the government, which adds to the costs.

So, before you think about things only from your rich person pov, realize that other people have different situations...




This poster is completely wrong. You get no aid at a much lower threshold than 250k! And if you do get aid in the 100s, it's really not enough.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2024 14:17     Subject: Does anyone actually care where someone, other than their child, goes to college?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think that society and the workplace need to change when it comes to this: Excellent students now pick in-state or lesser-known schools simply because of tuition costs. It doesn't mean they are less deserving. But it's still very much 45+yos hiring and that segment had it easier and cheaper so they do not all get it.


Ivy was far cheaper than UVA in state for ours, and a little cheaper than the T16-20 ranked privates that gave DC aid. We get need based aid and ivies are a great deal. It is less than 25k per year for us. UVA gave us only a small amount of beed based aid.


That's great but you knew that wasn't what I meant. A lot of kids are in that limbo of not qualifying for a lot or any aid and not having wealthy parents.


Nope not buying it is “not having wealthy parents” when ivies give need aid to families with HHI in the low to mid 200s. Come off it that’s rich . Ok so 250-260+ is about the lowest HHI that can get some aid. So what?? That’s easily full pay level for one kid, and for many if you have half a brain and saved 20k each year for some years. And yes DMV and people like us in that range (upper 200s) are full pay and fine. Not poor. Not in limbo. We are rich. We just spend it on an ivy education because we know what the name of an elite college can do and we know the difference in education


Okay. Now you try being a first gen person with your own debt who slowly rose and made 100k for many years. You're now making more, just enough to not qualify for anything, but your kids are in high school and you just finished paying your own debt. The inability for people to put themselves in other people's shoes is tiresome, and you sound like a huge snob.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2024 14:15     Subject: Does anyone actually care where someone, other than their child, goes to college?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think that society and the workplace need to change when it comes to this: Excellent students now pick in-state or lesser-known schools simply because of tuition costs. It doesn't mean they are less deserving. But it's still very much 45+yos hiring and that segment had it easier and cheaper so they do not all get it.


Ivy was far cheaper than UVA in state for ours, and a little cheaper than the T16-20 ranked privates that gave DC aid. We get need based aid and ivies are a great deal. It is less than 25k per year for us. UVA gave us only a small amount of beed based aid.


That's great but you knew that wasn't what I meant. A lot of kids are in that limbo of not qualifying for a lot or any aid and not having wealthy parents.


Nope not buying it is “not having wealthy parents” when ivies give need aid to families with HHI in the low to mid 200s. Come off it that’s rich . Ok so 250-260+ is about the lowest HHI that can get some aid. So what?? That’s easily full pay level for one kid, and for many if you have half a brain and saved 20k each year for some years. And yes DMV and people like us in that range (upper 200s) are full pay and fine. Not poor. Not in limbo. We are rich. We just spend it on an ivy education because we know what the name of an elite college can do and we know the difference in education


You sound quite angry about this.

Can you fix the Ivy school financial aid calculators then? I filled them out, and they all said they would give us no aid. But we earn very little. If I withdrew money from my 401K, I'd have to pay 10% to the government, which adds to the costs.

So, before you think about things only from your rich person pov, realize that other people have different situations...


Anonymous
Post 12/02/2024 14:15     Subject: Does anyone actually care where someone, other than their child, goes to college?
Anonymous wrote:I care about Kids friend group.


Care? Or just have interest in seeing where everyone goes?

We loved hearing all the different schools our kids friends went to. But were as happy for the ones that went to CNU as we were for the ones that went to Michigan or Dartmouth. We didn’t judge anyone by ranking of school.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2024 14:11     Subject: Does anyone actually care where someone, other than their child, goes to college?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think that society and the workplace need to change when it comes to this: Excellent students now pick in-state or lesser-known schools simply because of tuition costs. It doesn't mean they are less deserving. But it's still very much 45+yos hiring and that segment had it easier and cheaper so they do not all get it.


Ivy was far cheaper than UVA in state for ours, and a little cheaper than the T16-20 ranked privates that gave DC aid. We get need based aid and ivies are a great deal. It is less than 25k per year for us. UVA gave us only a small amount of beed based aid.


You're one of few of several thousand who are that fortunate. Those of us in the donut hole would not have that same experience.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2024 14:06     Subject: Does anyone actually care where someone, other than their child, goes to college?
Anonymous wrote:If someone else’s kid gets into HYPS and yours is at JMU (or maybe even UVA) then you know on some level you’re going to feel salty about it.


I wouldn't. We didn't do the HYSP prep that some others did. One spent years on getting the right awards for her kid. The kid was a legacy, etc.

My kids would not put up with being crafted or molded into a HYSP contender, so I don't feel a bit bad they didn't go there. I couldn't afford it anyway.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2024 14:02     Subject: Does anyone actually care where someone, other than their child, goes to college?
I care about Kids friend group.
Anonymous
Post 12/02/2024 13:54     Subject: Does anyone actually care where someone, other than their child, goes to college?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If someone else’s kid gets into HYPS and yours is at JMU (or maybe even UVA) then you know on some level you’re going to feel salty about it.


Not me.

I wasn't willing to do to my kids what needed to be done to get into HPY. So I would never even think to be salty.

For example, I have a brother that is the HPY type very successful, friends were always like... aren't you jealous and I thought no because I see from the front row of his life what he had to do to get there.

Heart attack at 50.


30+ years ago, getting into and through HYP was much easier, not Heart Attack City.

But fighting tooth and nail to climb the corporate latter is a different matter.