Like at any big school, I think each student can find the “culture” that best suits them. There is not only one culture at UVA.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two of our daughters went to UVA from NOVA. Both were in sororities. They are smart, pretty, outgoing, and come from money. They made good friends at UVA but are generally better friends with their high school friends. Neither did much dating in college because they both thought the guys were generally douchebags. They both married someone unconnected to UVA and both now have good jobs of the type that “give back.” They’re not big fans of corporate America.

If you’d ask them, they’d agree that certain types do better at UVA than others and they’d acknowledge that - at least on the surface - they fit the type while they were there. Neither has any regrets for having attended, but neither has any great love for the school either. They are both practical, and it was a practical decision for both.

Really amazing they met every guy at uva and hated them. Hard work to meet thousands of people! . This is an idiotic response. I’m sorry.

Never said they “hated” them. They didn’t. I said I thought they were douchebags and not dating material. Anybody who knows anything about UVA knows the guys are douchebags

This is ridiculous. DH went to undergrad at UVA, he's not a douchebag. Neither are his friends, who I have met and know well (well with one exception). Now, it's true I didn't know him until grad school, but I highly doubt he had a complete personality change in a year.

I can say that while my info is dated, the culture was very heavy on drinking. Traditions and culture focused on alcohol. Heavy fraternity and party culture. The stories my DH tells from his college days are very different from my own experience at a different school

Another UVA grad who votes for d-bag. It is completely unsurprising to me that you are defending your husband and his friends(!!) during a time period you didn’t know them.

Anonymous wrote:My DD is a second year URM student from FCPS. We are middle class for NOVA standards. She is in a sorority, studies hard, goes to “darties”, plays intramural sports, volunteers and goes to football and basketball games. She is dating a nice kid she met on campus, nothing serious. Yes, there is drinking going on in her social group, but I think they all figured out how to handle it their first semester. They also head to the libraries on Sundays and crank out their work. Most of her friends are from NOVA, but she also talks about the super wealthy kids from NE boarding schools. Some kids she knows from our hometown are not in the Greek system, and are doing just fine as well.

I think there is a place for every kind of kid at UVA, but they have to be go-getters, not a lot of hand-holding going on.

As someone who has a son there, this is spot on.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:UVA culture. Hmmm.

Part middle class nova kid plus old money southern kid plus urm kid from all 50 states.

Add in preppy and fratty. Add in competitive academically. Add in a ton of beer and bourbon.

Add in great soccer, swimming, softball and lacrosse teams, inconsistent basketball teams, and a football team that can be ahead by 21 points but lose the game more times than I can count.

I’m proud to have gone there but I developed a bad relationship with alcohol and dating/ hookup culture that it took me years to overcome. Could have happened at any d1 party school but I think UVA’s fraternity and drinking culture is especially toxic.

People do think I, smart and add IQ points when I say I went there though.

This is accurate (except you forget the old money Northerners/NYC/boarding school contingency), and I developed that same bad relationship that took me a long time to get a handle on.

I think UVA works well for kids with the right combo of looks/money/connections to get the best out the Greek system, or the kids with enough confidence/smarts/self-respect to know they want no part of that. The floaters in between can have the hardest time socially.

as a recent grad, this is the most spot-on description for social life at UVa

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hate to state the obvious but these incidents will occur on every college campus and certain behaviors will increase the likelihood. It’s up to everyone to make smart decisions and protect themselves by not putting themselves in certain situations.

Exactly. Starting at a young age, it’s vitally important to teach your boys that if they are at a party and get drunk, they need to stick with a buddy to keep from raping anyone.

...And to prevent the same boys from being raped. Male-male rape is much more common than crime statistics might suggest. Like other kinds of rape, it is hugely underreported.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hear that UVA culture is hyper competitive. Not an academic stress culture like W&M but cutthroat socially. Is this true?

William and Mary= proper liberal arts college

UVA= labor-power state university. Despite its size, it’s only good as subjects which allow one to sell their labor-power: law and business.

What a dumb thing to say. UVa still remains one of the top public schools in the country. It even got its 57th Rhodes Scholar recently.

William & Mary continues to drop in the rankings. It's not even Top 50 overall (or Top10 among the publics) anymore.

Do you think it changed in some significant way during the past 5 years? What about Tulane? Have test medians dropped significantly? What about GPA percentiles? Is the median ACT at Tulane an 18 now?

USNWR methodology changes are the only thing responsible for rankings shifts nowadays. Fewer and fewer people are looking at USNews and in a desperate effort to increase market share they shook things up.

Anonymous wrote:I hate to state the obvious but these incidents will occur on every college campus and certain behaviors will increase the likelihood. It’s up to everyone to make smart decisions and protect themselves by not putting themselves in certain situations.

Exactly. Starting at a young age, it’s vitally important to teach your boys that if they are at a party and get drunk, they need to stick with a buddy to keep from raping anyone.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:UVA culture. Hmmm.

Part middle class nova kid plus old money southern kid plus urm kid from all 50 states.

Add in preppy and fratty. Add in competitive academically. Add in a ton of beer and bourbon.

Add in great soccer, swimming, softball and lacrosse teams, inconsistent basketball teams, and a football team that can be ahead by 21 points but lose the game more times than I can count.

I’m proud to have gone there but I developed a bad relationship with alcohol and dating/ hookup culture that it took me years to overcome. Could have happened at any d1 party school but I think UVA’s fraternity and drinking culture is especially toxic.

People do think I, smart and add IQ points when I say I went there though.

Do you think this is all still the case in 2024? Admissions to UVA has become MUCH harder and I would think leans heavily to the brainy over simply the monied (like every top20 school in 2024 vs 2000 or 1996). There are no more legacy admissions so you're either top 10% instate or top of your out-of-state school.

I have a smart kid who is actually looking for a pretty mainstream university experience (what you describe hopefully minus most of the toxicity of the drinking and hook-up culture).

Uva admits people with 1350-1450 instate regularly, for private high schools admits down into the 3rd or 4th decile. Above average smarts is their majority. That is not brainy nor highly intellectual, it is standard-strong. Similar to Michigan UCLA USC Wake. There is a larger group of super-brainiacs than there are at T75 range schools, but it is not vloseto the majority as it is at T15/ivy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two of our daughters went to UVA from NOVA. Both were in sororities. They are smart, pretty, outgoing, and come from money. They made good friends at UVA but are generally better friends with their high school friends. Neither did much dating in college because they both thought the guys were generally douchebags. They both married someone unconnected to UVA and both now have good jobs of the type that “give back.” They’re not big fans of corporate America.

If you’d ask them, they’d agree that certain types do better at UVA than others and they’d acknowledge that - at least on the surface - they fit the type while they were there. Neither has any regrets for having attended, but neither has any great love for the school either. They are both practical, and it was a practical decision for both.

Really amazing they met every guy at uva and hated them. Hard work to meet thousands of people! . This is an idiotic response. I’m sorry.

Never said they “hated” them. They didn’t. I said I thought they were douchebags and not dating material. Anybody who knows anything about UVA knows the guys are douchebags

Well my Ds attends and he is the nicest guy ever, has had a GF his entire 3.5 years there (hs gf and then another uva student for the last 9 months). He’s truly a good guy. They do exist, his friends are like him.

My DD also attends and she is done with UVA men, she says the good ones are already taken and the rest are not worth her time. She’s had her heart broken several times. She looks back now and laughs, it’s been a growth experience. That being said, she says she is not going to meet anyone until she graduates next spring and is in the real world.

Both kids have very different views to the school they both attend. But they do agree on the wealth and attitudes particularly from OOS students. They both have best friends who are OOS, but they have seen some stunning wealth and entitlement.

As far as the academic culture, both have enjoyed it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hear that UVA culture is hyper competitive. Not an academic stress culture like W&M but cutthroat socially. Is this true?

William and Mary= proper liberal arts college

UVA= labor-power state university. Despite its size, it’s only good as subjects which allow one to sell their labor-power: law and business.

What a dumb thing to say. UVa still remains one of the top public schools in the country. It even got its 57th Rhodes Scholar recently.

William & Mary continues to drop in the rankings. It's not even Top 50 overall (or Top10 among the publics) anymore.

UVA graduate school of arts and science = toilet bowl

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two of our daughters went to UVA from NOVA. Both were in sororities. They are smart, pretty, outgoing, and come from money. They made good friends at UVA but are generally better friends with their high school friends. Neither did much dating in college because they both thought the guys were generally douchebags. They both married someone unconnected to UVA and both now have good jobs of the type that “give back.” They’re not big fans of corporate America.

If you’d ask them, they’d agree that certain types do better at UVA than others and they’d acknowledge that - at least on the surface - they fit the type while they were there. Neither has any regrets for having attended, but neither has any great love for the school either. They are both practical, and it was a practical decision for both.

Really amazing they met every guy at uva and hated them. Hard work to meet thousands of people! . This is an idiotic response. I’m sorry.

Never said they “hated” them. They didn’t. I said I thought they were douchebags and not dating material. Anybody who knows anything about UVA knows the guys are douchebags

This is ridiculous. DH went to undergrad at UVA, he's not a douchebag. Neither are his friends, who I have met and know well (well with one exception). Now, it's true I didn't know him until grad school, but I highly doubt he had a complete personality change in a year.

I can say that while my info is dated, the culture was very heavy on drinking. Traditions and culture focused on alcohol. Heavy fraternity and party culture. The stories my DH tells from his college days are very different from my own experience at a different school

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two of our daughters went to UVA from NOVA. Both were in sororities. They are smart, pretty, outgoing, and come from money. They made good friends at UVA but are generally better friends with their high school friends. Neither did much dating in college because they both thought the guys were generally douchebags. They both married someone unconnected to UVA and both now have good jobs of the type that “give back.” They’re not big fans of corporate America.

If you’d ask them, they’d agree that certain types do better at UVA than others and they’d acknowledge that - at least on the surface - they fit the type while they were there. Neither has any regrets for having attended, but neither has any great love for the school either. They are both practical, and it was a practical decision for both.

Really amazing they met every guy at uva and hated them. Hard work to meet thousands of people! . This is an idiotic response. I’m sorry.

Never said they “hated” them. They didn’t. I said I thought they were douchebags and not dating material. Anybody who knows anything about UVA knows the guys are douchebags

I don’t have a lot of knowledge about this as my girl is in her first year there, but I don’t think every guy she met in clubs is a bad guy. These generalizations are ridiculous.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two of our daughters went to UVA from NOVA. Both were in sororities. They are smart, pretty, outgoing, and come from money. They made good friends at UVA but are generally better friends with their high school friends. Neither did much dating in college because they both thought the guys were generally douchebags. They both married someone unconnected to UVA and both now have good jobs of the type that “give back.” They’re not big fans of corporate America.

If you’d ask them, they’d agree that certain types do better at UVA than others and they’d acknowledge that - at least on the surface - they fit the type while they were there. Neither has any regrets for having attended, but neither has any great love for the school either. They are both practical, and it was a practical decision for both.

Really amazing they met every guy at uva and hated them. Hard work to meet thousands of people! . This is an idiotic response. I’m sorry.

Never said they “hated” them. They didn’t. I said I thought they were douchebags and not dating material. Anybody who knows anything about UVA knows the guys are douchebags

Anonymous wrote:My DD is a second year URM student from FCPS. We are middle class for NOVA standards. She is in a sorority, studies hard, goes to “darties”, plays intramural sports, volunteers and goes to football and basketball games. She is dating a nice kid she met on campus, nothing serious. Yes, there is drinking going on in her social group, but I think they all figured out how to handle it their first semester. They also head to the libraries on Sundays and crank out their work. Most of her friends are from NOVA, but she also talks about the super wealthy kids from NE boarding schools. Some kids she knows from our hometown are not in the Greek system, and are doing just fine as well.

I think there is a place for every kind of kid at UVA, but they have to be go-getters, not a lot of hand-holding going on.

I agree with this poster. UVa makes a big deal about "self-governance" -- you deciding your destiny and plan of action. You hear about self-governance everywhere. There are a lot of resources at the University for students, but not a lot of hand-holding. You'll have to figure out what you want for yourself.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People ask what the culture is like at UVA. Everything I understand from what I experienced in the 90s is that it hasn’t changed that much, to be honest.

It’s preppy, fratty, hard drinking, hard partying, competitive academically. Great reputation, although seen as a bit snobby.

Yes it is more diverse now, harder to get into too. Yes, that drinking and frat culture can be found at plenty of other schools. But it all still stands. Yes you can skip all of that and focus on your other activities or things to do, but you asked what the culture is like and I don’t want to sugarcoat it.

What are your direct experiences or sources now

I have family members (nieces/nephews there, plus my kids’ friends)