Anonymous wrote:It comes down to four things: 1- Your kid's physicality; 2- How much are you willing to spend; 3- How much time are your kid willing to put in? 4- Where does your kid go to school?

If your child is small and/or short, avoid sports like football, basketball, baseball, lacrosse, swimming, or any sports that size/strength is an advantage. Choose sports like golf, tennis, or soccer (if your kid is fast). That's why you see many Asians at golf, tennis, and soccer at high school level. Height matters in tennis at college and pro level, not so much at high school level. Golf is where everyone can excel, regardless of size. Colin Morikawa and Xander Schauffele are not tall people, under 5"10, and they both won multiple golf grand slams. At the same time, golf and tennis are expensive sports, and your kid is likely to compete with other Asian kids if your kid wants to make the varsity team. Soccer also requires a lot of money, but much less than golf or tennis. Where your children attend school also matters a lot. The more expensive the pyramid, whether public or private, the percentage of your child makes the team also decreases because everyone there has as much resource, if not more, than you do.

Anonymous wrote:It comes down to four things: 1- Your kid's physicality; 2- How much are you willing to spend; 3- How much time are your kid willing to put in? 4- Where does your kid go to school?

If your child is small and/or short, avoid sports like football, basketball, baseball, lacrosse, swimming, or any sports that size/strength is an advantage. Choose sports like golf, tennis, or soccer (if your kid is fast). That's why you see many Asians at golf, tennis, and soccer at high school level. Height matters in tennis at college and pro level, not so much at high school level. Golf is where everyone can excel, regardless of size. Colin Morikawa and Xander Schauffele are not tall people, under 5"10, and they both won multiple golf grand slams. At the same time, golf and tennis are expensive sports, and your kid is likely to compete with other Asian kids if your kid wants to make the varsity team. Soccer also requires a lot of money, but much less than golf or tennis. Where your children attend school also matters a lot. The more expensive the pyramid, whether public or private, the percentage of your child makes the team also decreases because everyone there has as much resource, if not more, than you do.

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Anonymous wrote:You forgot the other thing that happens in football - they make the team because rosters are huge and never play in games. My son and many friends stopped playing after 9th grade because of this. They didn’t pick up another sport. They still went to the gym and lifted a lot in the spring and in 10th grade. By 11th grade some were really into going to the gym, others got into working and found part time jobs. They keep busy and interests change.

+1

Making the roster as a freshman is really just the first hurdle. A lot of kids drop off between freshman year and junior year or so. Little or no playing time so they don’t try out again next season, cuts at the JV level and varsity levels, other interests take over (driving, dating, PT jobs, other activities). A lot of the time, kids kind of “see the writing on the wall”, realize they probably aren’t going to be good enough to ever make varsity and actually see playing time, and quit/basically cut themselves.

My DS made JV in his main sport as a freshman, didn’t ever play, and looking around at the competition, realized he realistically didn’t have a path forward so didn’t try out as a soph. Switched to a no cut sport that had more opportunities and also got a PT job. Works out at the gym on his own or with friends.

Sports seemed like a much bigger focus when the kids were freshmen, but by junior year or so a lot of kids aren’t playing school sports anymore and have found other things to do.

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Anonymous wrote:Where did you go to high school and how big was our school? Were there really activities that literally the entire school could show up to want to participate in in the same semester, and they could accomodate everyone? Most US public schools - whether giant or moderately-sized - have limits to how many kids can do any 1 thing in any one semester, because there are staffing and space issues. So not sure how many extracurriculars are accessible for ALL students, but there are plenty in most schools that can accomodate all the students who show up wanting to do it. But when you can only have a limited # of players on a field in a competition at any given time, it's never been "accessible for all students". Not even when you were in school, wherever you were, although maybe games were less structured and there could be endless rotation of players so everyone played?

+1 If you want accessible to all, pay 40K$ for some private school that is small and lets everyone participate. Public schools are bigger and more resource challenged, so there's more competition.

>=40K private schools also have MANY cut-sports. As a matter of fact, there is even more competition in private than in public schools for sports that kids actually want to participate in. Many of these kids have been trained at a very young age. There are no-cut sports at private schools, but many kids do not want them.

Again, that depends on the school. You can absolutely find a rigorous high school that lets all kids play most if not all sports.

Sidwell and Potomac require sport(s) participation. Mine DCs tried out and got cut from both golf in the fall and tennis in the spring. Ended up in cross-country.

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Anonymous wrote:Yes, but it’s not hard to find other activities for your child to participate in!

I just don't understand why sports have to be more selective than other activites

I don't understand your comment at all. What do you mean "I don't understand why sports have to be more selective than other activities"? Sports are literally "competitive" by nature, and there are only so many teams and spots on teams for the most popular sports. What part of needing to choose who is on teams surprises you or feels bizarre given the competitive nature of sports?

Robotics and debate are generally more accessible than sports, so I don't see why sports have to be super selective when schools should be about academics.

Well, those activities operate a little different.

Robotics typically has a “varsity” team that is actually on the floor driving the robot and allowed into the pit area to make repairs/tweaks between matches, and then there are lots of kids cheering in the stands and doing competitive analysis. The team captain will give those kids things to do during build season, though usually targeted small jobs.

This would be the equivalent of a coach saying everyone can come to practice, but only X kids can actually suit up for the game and the rest of the team should be watching film and providing statistical analysis and cheering.

Not sure how many kids would be happy with “making the team” but only ever serving in those support roles.

Then what extracurriculars in high school are accessible for all students?

Charity clubs like Red Cross and Key Club, Scouting, mental health clubs like Our Minds Matter, Fanquest/Buddies clubs, purely social stuff like anime clubs and the like…

Clubs have been a reasonable way for my non-sporty kid to get more involved, but there are limits to that as well. At our school, the late bus runs only once a week and clubs are held on non-late bus days. So that means kids have to find a way on their own. For non-driving kids with parents who aren't able to get them at 4pm, club participation is probably limited.

That's why all of this is optional.

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Anonymous wrote:Then why do colleges expect kids to do extracurriculars when most kids can't?

Can’t? There are lots of things to do as ECs.

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Anonymous wrote:Yes, but it’s not hard to find other activities for your child to participate in!

I just don't understand why sports have to be more selective than other activites

I don't understand your comment at all. What do you mean "I don't understand why sports have to be more selective than other activities"? Sports are literally "competitive" by nature, and there are only so many teams and spots on teams for the most popular sports. What part of needing to choose who is on teams surprises you or feels bizarre given the competitive nature of sports?

Robotics and debate are generally more accessible than sports, so I don't see why sports have to be super selective when schools should be about academics.

Well, those activities operate a little different.

Robotics typically has a “varsity” team that is actually on the floor driving the robot and allowed into the pit area to make repairs/tweaks between matches, and then there are lots of kids cheering in the stands and doing competitive analysis. The team captain will give those kids things to do during build season, though usually targeted small jobs.

This would be the equivalent of a coach saying everyone can come to practice, but only X kids can actually suit up for the game and the rest of the team should be watching film and providing statistical analysis and cheering.

Not sure how many kids would be happy with “making the team” but only ever serving in those support roles.

Then what extracurriculars in high school are accessible for all students?

Charity clubs like Red Cross and Key Club, Scouting, mental health clubs like Our Minds Matter, Fanquest/Buddies clubs, purely social stuff like anime clubs and the like…

Clubs have been a reasonable way for my non-sporty kid to get more involved, but there are limits to that as well. At our school, the late bus runs only once a week and clubs are held on non-late bus days. So that means kids have to find a way on their own. For non-driving kids with parents who aren't able to get them at 4pm, club participation is probably limited.

Anonymous wrote:Then why do colleges expect kids to do extracurriculars when most kids can't?

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Anonymous wrote:Yes, but it’s not hard to find other activities for your child to participate in!

I just don't understand why sports have to be more selective than other activites

I don't understand your comment at all. What do you mean "I don't understand why sports have to be more selective than other activities"? Sports are literally "competitive" by nature, and there are only so many teams and spots on teams for the most popular sports. What part of needing to choose who is on teams surprises you or feels bizarre given the competitive nature of sports?

Robotics and debate are generally more accessible than sports, so I don't see why sports have to be super selective when schools should be about academics.

My kid got cut from Science Olympiad as a junior. So some academic ECs are selective.

Which is insane because colleges expect high school kids to do a bunch of extracurriculars, yet they high school extracurriculars are so hard to get into. And even doing and succeeding in these extracurriculars is generally not enough for top schools

Anonymous wrote:Like there aren't many options if you aren't good enough to play JV. There isn't a rec league for lacrosse or football. Your options are so limited in your teenage years, so basically you are forced out of sports.