Anonymous wrote:We have, maybe, a bit of a dilemma. Maybe we are overthinking.

We have a wedding to attend next weekend. Kids aren’t invited. We have one DD13. We had a plan set up where she was going to spend the night with a friend, but the parents unfortunately had to cancel. DD13 is adamant she does not want to spend the night with her grandma, who is our only local family (long backstory, but we don’t blame her.) So now we have two other options:

One of us doesn’t go and stays home with DD, or

We bring DD along (we are staying at a hotel for the night) and she stays in the hotel room while we attend the reception (only one of us would attend the wedding), which is a half mile down the road. We would get her a pizza for dinner and she could do what she would do at home anyway on a Saturday night: FaceTime with friends, watch movies, hang out in her room.

Option 2 is what DD wants, she thinks it will be fun. I’m worried she will be bored or get scared in the hotel room alone (it’s a large Marriott.) We have no clue what to do.

You can't leave a 13 year old home for a night? By 13 I was watching other people's kids for a night! Teach your child some skills so they are self reliant!

Is your child SN? I can’t imagine any other scenario where you would not leave a kid in this situation.

I had a 12yo babysit my kid.

Anonymous wrote:Why in the world would a 13yo be scared in a hotel room for a few hours? Esp if she has a phone. Option 2, for sure.

Plus 1

Anonymous wrote:You rsvp'd to the wedding and your child is old enough to be in a hotel room alone for a few hours. You both attend the wedding and the reception, get her some pizza, and she stays at the hotel until you return. At 13 she is old enough to babysit others. She can be alone in a hotel for a few hours.

+1
Very odd to even consider one staying with her. Another option would be to find a different friend for hwr to stay with.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We took our dc to the wedding, and he stayed in the hotel room for the reception. FWIW church weddings technically are open to the parish to attend, so you could take her to the ceremony if it's in a church.

Dont do this. It’s rude.

No it isn't. Anyway, people who get married in religious houses of worship generally don't ban kids from their weddings. Most religious people consider kids to be the point of marriage.

I'm of a religion that definitely considers kids to be a major part of marriage (Catholic) and all of my Catholic friends and family do not have young kids at the receptions.

Have you never left your 13yo in a hotel room?

My kids are fairly sheltered and my 13 and 15yo still are able to roam freely at a hotel resort. They can walk to get food, etc.

Hotel 100% and let her enjoy it!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why in the world would a 13yo be scared in a hotel room for a few hours? Esp if she has a phone. Option 2, for sure.

I have no idea! Unfamiliar sounds in an unfamiliar location? Like I said, I’m probably overthinking.

You’re overthinking. It’s the first time for something like this and it’s normal to worry.

If it’s a big Marriot. I would also run through the emergency procedures and show her where the fire exit went.

We had all these planning with food and all for my teen while we left for an event. Our teen was in the room in NYC. 30 storeys or so. Same scenario but ours was just in the lower levels and annex of the same building. We couldn’t go up when the fire alarm started and she had to walk the stairs down. It was a real fire that was quickly put out but it was chaotic. She didn’t know what to do because we told her not to open the door or leave the room or answer any door knocks. When she stepped out she didn’t know where to go. Phone service was dead somehow and we couldn’t call the room. Most horrifying 30 mins till we reconnected. And because of all the urgency, she came down in sweat pants but just a t shirt, no coat and we had to stand out for nearly an hour. It was around 45 degrees weather.

The fire was one floor under her and something did trip the electrical so it was emergency lighting, she could smell smoke etc. Freaked her out and she didn’t know what to do.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why in the world would a 13yo be scared in a hotel room for a few hours? Esp if she has a phone. Option 2, for sure.

I have no idea! Unfamiliar sounds in an unfamiliar location? Like I said, I’m probably overthinking.

Is she neurodiverse?

Use plain language instead of clinical mumbo jumbo please and thank you.

Please. Tell us what word you would use? I have a feeling we all know..