Okay... I have read these again. A troll feeding itself. Probably a dude.

Don't you have anything else to do? A family to take care of? Sheesh

Either go to the non flagship instate school - they can get into one, or do community college then apply in a year or two. If they want state starship after community college they can’t mess up there.

Anonymous[b wrote:]Tell them they should go to community college for a year or two and figure out if they are going to put in the work needed to succeed in college. Many State colleges have automatic admission for students with a certain number of credits coming from community college.

[/b]


This. It's a very reasonable and cost efficient plan. VA, and California are states with vibrant community college transfer programs.

Unsaid it the fact that the OP said her kids were in parochial schools. Some Catholics believe that large families and the gift of life are paramount and secondary education comes after. That is not me, but it is a fact. My kid was in parochial school and there we met many families with huge families. In some of these (12 kids!), the kid is on their own at 18. The parents cannot afford college. That is the parents' choice and a view I don't share but one that some Catholic (and Mormon) families have. So give OP a break.

No, if they are struggling in high school then perhaps there is another path for them - vocational training or just a regular job. College is not for those who struggle in high school, sounds like they aren’t ready for that. My teen went thru this, and worked a few jobs then went into a vocational program that paid for training if he signed two year contract to work with company and passed the course successfully.

Tell them they should go to community college for a year or two and figure out if they are going to put in the work needed to succeed in college. Many State colleges have automatic admission for students with a certain number of credits coming from community college.

Anonymous wrote:Kids are not high achieving students, college tuition is so incredible high. If my kids were excellent students, involved in extracurriculars then, yes, I can see paying most of it, all if they go to a state university. Right now their cum can’t even get them in a state college. DD has a glorified outlook she’ll go to an out of state, a not so “fancy” one says- they all cost $40k tuition nevermind lodging, foid, and transport. DH is the kind of guy that caves in…

They’re in a parochial, private high school that we are paying for with these lukewarm grades. I can’t afford more tutors. How did you deliver the news to the kids that they have no choice? To your “princess?”

Those grades from a parochial private in Virginia will get them into the secondary publics —there are many great options to get a solid degree from these. What are they going to do otherwise? A trade? Kids from parochial and private often have no pre-trade training or interest. Community college is ok too but the outcomes are not the same as starting at a 4 yr , UNLESS they are highly motivated which you have implied yours are not. A smaller public with a 4 yr degree will help them. How can you pay for private HS and not pay for college(it sounds as though you can afford it, you do not want to).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kids are not high achieving students, college tuition is so incredible high. If my kids were excellent students, involved in extracurriculars then, yes, I can see paying most of it, all if they go to a state university. Right now their cum can’t even get them in a state college. DD has a glorified outlook she’ll go to an out of state, a not so “fancy” one says- they all cost $40k tuition nevermind lodging, foid, and transport. DH is the kind of guy that caves in…

They’re in a parochial, private high school that we are paying for with these lukewarm grades. I can’t afford more tutors. How did you deliver the news to the kids that they have no choice? To your “princess?”

I took that as short for cumulative.

And foid (firearm owners identification). Is supposed to be food.
I don’t think op is a women. Not only because of these autocorrect changes but also because she calls her child a princess in quotes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:sorry, OP, but you sound like a shitty parent.

Nope. She’s exactly right and smart. You, however, sound like an idiot.

It’s better for the whole family if the parents invest the money for their retirement since it’s unlikely to generate a significant return with the kids. I’d tell them they pay for the first year at a state school, if they get a 3.5 or higher I’ll pay.

One of my siblings fits this profile (struggled to get a 3.0 in HS) and is now an airline captain making over $200k in their thirties. Parents paid for flight school and a degree at a low-ranking school. Another family member barely graduated high school, took accounting classes at the CC, started a construction company, and made $ 1m-$10m annually for decades. College isn't for everyone, and just because someone doesn't do well in school doesn't mean they won't have a strong workout if they find their path. The most important thing is to help your kids find their path and support them however you can.

Anonymous wrote:sorry, OP, but you sound like a shitty parent.

Nope. She’s exactly right and smart. You, however, sound like an idiot.

It’s better for the whole family if the parents invest the money for their retirement since it’s unlikely to generate a significant return with the kids. I’d tell them they pay for the first year at a state school, if they get a 3.5 or higher I’ll pay.

Anonymous wrote:I think these are the kind of kids you should pay for because they likely need more help than the straight A kids

lol. Bless your heart.

The kids are lazy. So, the kids that work hard should be penalized and the lazy kids should get the reward/help.?

You’re such a democrat.

I agree with Community College. Maybe they can find a trade they will enjoy. Many (most) trades will be a better option than a liberal arts degree at a low-ranking LAC.

Also, if your 2.9 can get over 3.0, there's SO MUCH money for students at small LAC and smaller state schools.

My kid with a 3.2 at a parochial school got a TON of money.

West Virginia - automatic 8K with a 3.0. It's a decent school and they need students. Super welcoming.

Towson - automatic 10K with a 3.0. Again, the school has some well regarded programs.

With creative outlooks, you can find inexpensive schools that will give you a college degree for less than 30K a year. Salisbury is another one. Not sure where you are, but in DC you get the DC TAG, which is worth 10K at a state school. Maryland has a bunch of smaller schools. Virginia has options. PLENTY of small public schools in PA - we toured but did not apply to Slippery Rock and Shippensburg, both of which are still sending emails saying it's not too late! Also Duquesne. Endless emails and kid did not even apply, just toured.

My kid has some learning issues and is easily discouraged. We built a tour and application list that I knew would boost their self confidence and make them feel good about their choices.

Even below a 3.0 you will have options that will not be crazy.

Anonymous wrote:Community college

THis.

sorry, OP, but you sound like a shitty parent.

Anonymous wrote:Kids are not high achieving students, college tuition is so incredible high. If my kids were excellent students, involved in extracurriculars then, yes, I can see paying most of it, all if they go to a state university. Right now their cum can’t even get them in a state college. DD has a glorified outlook she’ll go to an out of state, a not so “fancy” one says- they all cost $40k tuition nevermind lodging, foid, and transport. DH is the kind of guy that caves in…

They’re in a parochial, private high school that we are paying for with these lukewarm grades. I can’t afford more tutors. How did you deliver the news to the kids that they have no choice? To your “princess?”

Do you want them to succeed or not? C's graduate but, if they drop out than what? Would you want to have them fail? How do you know that they aren't doing their best?