Why are Jersey and New York (translation: Long Island) people so insufferable and obnoxious about...everything?

I say dark toasted. It works.

Op here. Wasn’t expecting to have so many opinions on this. And now I have some new bagel places to check out.

I have tried ordering this so many ways over the years. Double toasted. Triple toasted. Burnt. Toast it twice. Toast it until it’s black. Many places have “double toasted” as one of their standard buttons so it’s gotta be a thing right?

This truly is not some NYC bagel snob thing…this is simply about toasting. I’ve tried different bagel shops and different times of day and it’s always the same. It’s like they don’t believe me when I say to burn it (I get that). I never complain and never send it back - I just eat my bagel and hope for a different outcome on a different day or at a different shop. I’ve convinced myself that they dont make commercial toasters like they used to.

And yes I could toast it at home but sometimes I just crave a bagel with cream cheese on my way to work. Sue me.

Thanks for the chuckles on a quiet Friday night. And thanks to those hilariously aggressive posters.

Say: toast it twice? Toast it dark?

Anonymous wrote:I thought people toasted bagels only if the bagels weren't that good. A proper, chewy bagel doesn't need toasted.

Sad round bread with a hole bagels need to be toasted or they'll have no texture.

OP, why aren't you asking for it to be "toasted dark" or saying "Can you run it through the toaster twice"? Why are you insisting on using terminology that isn't working?

If you want a dairy product in your coffee, do you ask for "regular coffee" and then complain that it comes black? Or do you ask for coffee with cream or white coffee or whatever the local terminology is?

Shout out to all the people from Southern California who are bugged that no one else puts a "the" in front of an interstate number.

This is true, but no one is melting cheese and onions on a proper chewy bagel in the first place.

Anonymous wrote:I feel this, OP. My other pet peeve is when I order a bagel and cream cheese and instead of putting the cc on the bagel, they put it in a tiny little ramekin in an amount that barely covers half the bagel.

Oh yes I remember those days of cream cheese anxiety. Or when the workers give a smear on part of the bagel but you have no utensil so you're trying to work the bread spread while you eat. The proportions are so key that I'm getting anxiety just remembering.

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Anonymous wrote:Never heard of "double toasted". "Toasted, dark".

Even if you've never heard the phrase, it's pretty easy to infer what it means, no?

No.

It could mean toasted on both sides rather than only the cut side.

I don't understand why you insist on ordering this way when it isn't getting the result you want. It works in NY/NJ? Great, do it there. But it's not working here, so use more words to explain what you want.

Not the OP, or from NY/NJ, but this seems awfully obvious.

You would think... but I can believe it's enough of a regionalism people don't get it. Like in NY/NJ you can order, "two pizzas, one plain one pepperoni" but in DC no one understands that plain means a cheese pizza

Really? What else could it mean other than cheese? It seems pretty clear to me.

DP but we ordered one at a restaurant and they brought crust with sauce!!

😂😂 . I think some people just lack common sense.

Seriously! We said "this is missing the cheese" and he said "you didn't ask for cheese, I thought you wanted it plain?". I wanted to say, how is it different than ordering a perpperoni? You don't order pepperoni and cheese!

This happened to me twice before I got with the program and to order cheese pizza.

Anonymous wrote:This is a very petty post but I’m wondering if this is normal.

I love a good bagel and have ordered it the same way for most of my life: double toasted (everything or onion) bagel with cream cheese. I like the crispy texture, the melted cream cheese and the char of the toasted onions. I’m from NYC and this was a normal order and never had a problem.

I’ve lived in the DMV for over a decade and never once has a bagel shop actually toasted it the way I ask. They are not even hot to the touch and don’t even have a light toasted color. I’ve tried adjusting and saying “triple toasted” or “burn it” and it’s never toasted enough. What am I doing wrong?

Nothing. Dc isn't NYC

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Anonymous wrote:Never heard of "double toasted". "Toasted, dark".

Even if you've never heard the phrase, it's pretty easy to infer what it means, no?

No.

It could mean toasted on both sides rather than only the cut side.

I don't understand why you insist on ordering this way when it isn't getting the result you want. It works in NY/NJ? Great, do it there. But it's not working here, so use more words to explain what you want.

Not the OP, or from NY/NJ, but this seems awfully obvious.

You would think... but I can believe it's enough of a regionalism people don't get it. Like in NY/NJ you can order, "two pizzas, one plain one pepperoni" but in DC no one understands that plain means a cheese pizza

Really? What else could it mean other than cheese? It seems pretty clear to me.

DP but we ordered one at a restaurant and they brought crust with sauce!!

😂😂 . I think some people just lack common sense.

Seriously! We said "this is missing the cheese" and he said "you didn't ask for cheese, I thought you wanted it plain?". I wanted to say, how is it different than ordering a perpperoni? You don't order pepperoni and cheese!

Thanks for the Friday laugh. I would’ve been in disbelief. I grew up here in Montgomery County and believe me, plain pizza is a thing!

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Anonymous wrote:Never heard of "double toasted". "Toasted, dark".

Even if you've never heard the phrase, it's pretty easy to infer what it means, no?

No.

It could mean toasted on both sides rather than only the cut side.

I don't understand why you insist on ordering this way when it isn't getting the result you want. It works in NY/NJ? Great, do it there. But it's not working here, so use more words to explain what you want.

Not the OP, or from NY/NJ, but this seems awfully obvious.

You would think... but I can believe it's enough of a regionalism people don't get it. Like in NY/NJ you can order, "two pizzas, one plain one pepperoni" but in DC no one understands that plain means a cheese pizza

Really? What else could it mean other than cheese? It seems pretty clear to me.

DP but we ordered one at a restaurant and they brought crust with sauce!!

😂😂 . I think some people just lack common sense.

Seriously! We said "this is missing the cheese" and he said "you didn't ask for cheese, I thought you wanted it plain?". I wanted to say, how is it different than ordering a perpperoni? You don't order pepperoni and cheese!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Never heard of "double toasted". "Toasted, dark".

Even if you've never heard the phrase, it's pretty easy to infer what it means, no?

No.

It could mean toasted on both sides rather than only the cut side.

I don't understand why you insist on ordering this way when it isn't getting the result you want. It works in NY/NJ? Great, do it there. But it's not working here, so use more words to explain what you want.

Not the OP, or from NY/NJ, but this seems awfully obvious.

You would think... but I can believe it's enough of a regionalism people don't get it. Like in NY/NJ you can order, "two pizzas, one plain one pepperoni" but in DC no one understands that plain means a cheese pizza

Really? What else could it mean other than cheese? It seems pretty clear to me.

DP but we ordered one at a restaurant and they brought crust with sauce!!

😂😂 . I think some people just lack common sense.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Never heard of "double toasted". "Toasted, dark".

Even if you've never heard the phrase, it's pretty easy to infer what it means, no?

No.

It could mean toasted on both sides rather than only the cut side.

I don't understand why you insist on ordering this way when it isn't getting the result you want. It works in NY/NJ? Great, do it there. But it's not working here, so use more words to explain what you want.

Not the OP, or from NY/NJ, but this seems awfully obvious.

You would think... but I can believe it's enough of a regionalism people don't get it. Like in NY/NJ you can order, "two pizzas, one plain one pepperoni" but in DC no one understands that plain means a cheese pizza

Really? What else could it mean other than cheese? It seems pretty clear to me.

DP but we ordered one at a restaurant and they brought crust with sauce!!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Never heard of "double toasted". "Toasted, dark".

Even if you've never heard the phrase, it's pretty easy to infer what it means, no?

No.

It could mean toasted on both sides rather than only the cut side.

I don't understand why you insist on ordering this way when it isn't getting the result you want. It works in NY/NJ? Great, do it there. But it's not working here, so use more words to explain what you want.

Not the OP, or from NY/NJ, but this seems awfully obvious.

You would think... but I can believe it's enough of a regionalism people don't get it. Like in NY/NJ you can order, "two pizzas, one plain one pepperoni" but in DC no one understands that plain means a cheese pizza

Really? What else could it mean other than cheese? It seems pretty clear to me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Never heard of "double toasted". "Toasted, dark".

Even if you've never heard the phrase, it's pretty easy to infer what it means, no?

No.

It could mean toasted on both sides rather than only the cut side.

I don't understand why you insist on ordering this way when it isn't getting the result you want. It works in NY/NJ? Great, do it there. But it's not working here, so use more words to explain what you want.

Not the OP, or from NY/NJ, but this seems awfully obvious.

You would think... but I can believe it's enough of a regionalism people don't get it. Like in NY/NJ you can order, "two pizzas, one plain one pepperoni" but in DC no one understands that plain means a cheese pizza.

This may be the greatest example of New York provincialism I've ever seen. Lots of people everywhere understand the "plain" means cheese & sauce and nothing else.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Never heard of "double toasted". "Toasted, dark".

Even if you've never heard the phrase, it's pretty easy to infer what it means, no?

No.

It could mean toasted on both sides rather than only the cut side.

I don't understand why you insist on ordering this way when it isn't getting the result you want. It works in NY/NJ? Great, do it there. But it's not working here, so use more words to explain what you want.

Not the OP, or from NY/NJ, but this seems awfully obvious.

You would think... but I can believe it's enough of a regionalism people don't get it. Like in NY/NJ you can order, "two pizzas, one plain one pepperoni" but in DC no one understands that plain means a cheese pizza.