Anonymous wrote:Man here. Married 20+ years. Married sex 1x week. I want more, she does not. So I have had long-term affairs for at least ten years. I got caught once, confessed and went to counseling. We are still married and I still have 2 long term affairs. I am better at not getting caught, although I really think my wife does not want to know. She questions things less. I am not sure my APs care that I sleep with my wife. They do not know about each other.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man here. Married 20+ years. Married sex 1x week. I want more, she does not. So I have had long-term affairs for at least ten years. I got caught once, confessed and went to counseling. We are still married and I still have 2 long term affairs. I am better at not getting caught, although I really think my wife does not want to know. She questions things less. I am not sure my APs care that I sleep with my wife. They do not know about each other.

I was the wife in a very similar situation and in my case, it wasn't that I didn't want to know, it was that I was busy biding my time and making my exit plans. Soon after finding out my then-husband was cheating on me (and had been for years, with multiple women) I called a lawyer and discovered that the state I lived in wasn't going to take his adultery into consideration in terms of support and that I was in no financial position to take care of my kids and myself at that point in my life. So I sat down and made a plan and spent three years checking boxes until I had the things I needed to make a life outside my marriage. Did I know he was actively sleeping with several women throughout it all? Of course I did, I wasn't an idiot. But I had turned a page and I had my own things to take care of. So I did what I had to do in order to create the life I wanted, which included going through the motions of a marriage I had no interest in actually being in. I have no idea if he ever knew what I was up to and honestly, I don't care. All I care about is that when I filed for divorce I did it with the full knowledge that I would be ok and be able to support my kids and myself regardless of what choices he made.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man here. Married 20+ years. Married sex 1x week. I want more, she does not. So I have had long-term affairs for at least ten years. I got caught once, confessed and went to counseling. We are still married and I still have 2 long term affairs. I am better at not getting caught, although I really think my wife does not want to know. She questions things less. I am not sure my APs care that I sleep with my wife. They do not know about each other.

You’re living the life. What’s nice is that not one of your APs has to completely fill the void. Plus since you’re used to juggling them anyway, if you come across some hottie who is an upgrade you can drop one of the APs for the hottie, and keep the other one just in case. So you’re never alone. Smart.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man here. Married 20+ years. Married sex 1x week. I want more, she does not. So I have had long-term affairs for at least ten years. I got caught once, confessed and went to counseling. We are still married and I still have 2 long term affairs. I am better at not getting caught, although I really think my wife does not want to know. She questions things less. I am not sure my APs care that I sleep with my wife. They do not know about each other.

I was the wife in a very similar situation and in my case, it wasn't that I didn't want to know, it was that I was busy biding my time and making my exit plans. Soon after finding out my then-husband was cheating on me (and had been for years, with multiple women) I called a lawyer and discovered that the state I lived in wasn't going to take his adultery into consideration in terms of support and that I was in no financial position to take care of my kids and myself at that point in my life. So I sat down and made a plan and spent three years checking boxes until I had the things I needed to make a life outside my marriage. Did I know he was actively sleeping with several women throughout it all? Of course I did, I wasn't an idiot. But I had turned a page and I had my own things to take care of. So I did what I had to do in order to create the life I wanted, which included going through the motions of a marriage I had no interest in actually being in. I have no idea if he ever knew what I was up to and honestly, I don't care. All I care about is that when I filed for divorce I did it with the full knowledge that I would be ok and be able to support my kids and myself regardless of what choices he made.

Anonymous wrote:For the men who have cheated, do you tend to juggle more than 1 AP at a time?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wife opened a medical record that my doctor sent home. (She pays the bills and opened it thinking it was a bill.). She found out other things to by watching the (joint) cell phone bill and installing a keylogger on her laptop, which I sometimes used.

I told her the girl meant nothing and asked not to break up and agreed to go to therapy with her. But, I lied in therapy for about a year. She found out about the lying and kicked me out.

Definitely not a dead bedroom situation - we had sex multiple times a week. I had two kids with her while I was sleeping with various other women over 3-4 years.

How do you install a keylogger? I assume you have to know their computer password to get in first?

I didn't/don't know anything about computers or keyloggers. As I said above, I was contacting other women on her laptop, so her getting the password wasn't an issue.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man here. Married 20+ years. Married sex 1x week. I want more, she does not. So I have had long-term affairs for at least ten years. I got caught once, confessed and went to counseling. We are still married and I still have 2 long term affairs. I am better at not getting caught, although I really think my wife does not want to know. She questions things less. I am not sure my APs care that I sleep with my wife. They do not know about each other.

You’re living the life. What’s nice is that not one of your APs has to completely fill the void. Plus since you’re used to juggling them anyway, if you come across some hottie who is an upgrade you can drop one of the APs for the hottie, and keep the other one just in case. So you’re never alone. Smart.

Anonymous wrote:Man here. Married 20+ years. Married sex 1x week. I want more, she does not. So I have had long-term affairs for at least ten years. I got caught once, confessed and went to counseling. We are still married and I still have 2 long term affairs. I am better at not getting caught, although I really think my wife does not want to know. She questions things less. I am not sure my APs care that I sleep with my wife. They do not know about each other.

Anonymous wrote:Man here. Married 20+ years. Married sex 1x week. I want more, she does not. So I have had long-term affairs for at least ten years. I got caught once, confessed and went to counseling. We are still married and I still have 2 long term affairs. I am better at not getting caught, although I really think my wife does not want to know. She questions things less. I am not sure my APs care that I sleep with my wife. They do not know about each other.

Anonymous wrote:Man here. Married 20+ years. Married sex 1x week. I want more, she does not. So I have had long-term affairs for at least ten years. I got caught once, confessed and went to counseling. We are still married and I still have 2 long term affairs. I am better at not getting caught, although I really think my wife does not want to know. She questions things less. I am not sure my APs care that I sleep with my wife. They do not know about each other.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wife opened a medical record that my doctor sent home. (She pays the bills and opened it thinking it was a bill.). She found out other things to by watching the (joint) cell phone bill and installing a keylogger on her laptop, which I sometimes used.

I told her the girl meant nothing and asked not to break up and agreed to go to therapy with her. But, I lied in therapy for about a year. She found out about the lying and kicked me out.

Definitely not a dead bedroom situation - we had sex multiple times a week. I had two kids with her while I was sleeping with various other women over 3-4 years.

How do you install a keylogger? I assume you have to know their computer password to get in first?

I didn't/don't know anything about computers or keyloggers. As I said above, I was contacting other women on her laptop, so her getting the password wasn't an issue.

Wow. That's pretty brazen to be contacting other women on her laptop!!! LOL.

Brazen is one word for it.

NP. It's very annoying that you keep impersonating your ex husband.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wife opened a medical record that my doctor sent home. (She pays the bills and opened it thinking it was a bill.). She found out other things to by watching the (joint) cell phone bill and installing a keylogger on her laptop, which I sometimes used.

I told her the girl meant nothing and asked not to break up and agreed to go to therapy with her. But, I lied in therapy for about a year. She found out about the lying and kicked me out.

Definitely not a dead bedroom situation - we had sex multiple times a week. I had two kids with her while I was sleeping with various other women over 3-4 years.

How do you install a keylogger? I assume you have to know their computer password to get in first?

I didn't/don't know anything about computers or keyloggers. As I said above, I was contacting other women on her laptop, so her getting the password wasn't an issue.

Wow. That's pretty brazen to be contacting other women on her laptop!!! LOL.

Brazen is one word for it.