Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Hi, I took Sara to ice skating on Wed but she didn’t have the $30 for admission/rental so I loaned it to her. My Venmo is Xxx when you get a chance.”

I would fine-tune this a bit, to make it clear that you were just the Uber driver and not the host. (“I took Sara skating” could sound like you invited her as a guest.)

“Last Saturday, the girls decided they wanted to go ice skating. When I dropped them off, Sara realized she had forgotten her money so I loaned her $30 to cover her admission and rental. My Venmo is xxxxx when you get a chance.”

This. Simple, polite, direct.

+1

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Hi, I took Sara to ice skating on Wed but she didn’t have the $30 for admission/rental so I loaned it to her. My Venmo is Xxx when you get a chance.”

I would fine-tune this a bit, to make it clear that you were just the Uber driver and not the host. (“I took Sara skating” could sound like you invited her as a guest.)

“Last Saturday, the girls decided they wanted to go ice skating. When I dropped them off, Sara realized she had forgotten her money so I loaned her $30 to cover her admission and rental. My Venmo is xxxxx when you get a chance.”

This. I think it’s important for OP’s role to be clear. She was just a carpool parent, not a host.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Hi, I took Sara to ice skating on Wed but she didn’t have the $30 for admission/rental so I loaned it to her. My Venmo is Xxx when you get a chance.”

I would fine-tune this a bit, to make it clear that you were just the Uber driver and not the host. (“I took Sara skating” could sound like you invited her as a guest.)

“Last Saturday, the girls decided they wanted to go ice skating. When I dropped them off, Sara realized she had forgotten her money so I loaned her $30 to cover her admission and rental. My Venmo is xxxxx when you get a chance.”

This. Simple, polite, direct.

Anonymous wrote:“Hi, I took Sara to ice skating on Wed but she didn’t have the $30 for admission/rental so I loaned it to her. My Venmo is Xxx when you get a chance.”

I would fine-tune this a bit, to make it clear that you were just the Uber driver and not the host. (“I took Sara skating” could sound like you invited her as a guest.)

“Last Saturday, the girls decided they wanted to go ice skating. When I dropped them off, Sara realized she had forgotten her money so I loaned her $30 to cover her admission and rental. My Venmo is xxxxx when you get a chance.”

Just ask. I would never want someone to pay that much for my kid. If my kid forgot, it’s my responsibility. I’m the parent. They are the kid.

I’m happy to pay and thanks for driving. I’m not a moocher

They don't have apple pay or Greenlight cards by age 13? That seems odd to me.

Not saying what happened here, but some kids get the $ from their parents but don’t use it so other kid’s parent pays for them and kids pocket what they originally got. The other parent thinks they did pay and driver may be miffed they covered. All to say, if bothers you that paid for all, text other parents. They may be surprised to find out the $ they gave their kid didn’t go to paying for the activity.

OP ~ you know for next time. Don't say, "yes" to your daughter until she has collected the money ahead of time.

If you guys asked me for $30 I would think you were incredibly weird and cheap.

Anonymous wrote:You need to have a conversation with your child about how she communicated about the cost with her friends. If she swears she had the conversation, she can ask the friends to pay her. If the friends don't pay, your DD should pay.

What activity costs $30?

Not OP but one activity that is often $30 is an escape room.

I've been in this exact situation at this age and just ate the cost.
This is a weird age because they are kind of independent but need rides and some don't carry money. By high school almost every kid we know carries money so this was a short-term thing.

But I have been asked for Venmo by other parents and it was NBD. Often my DD had money but the parents ended up buying all the tickets at once because it was easier or something like that so I ended up reimbursing anyway.

I agree that if this is a hardship ask once and then forget about it.

Anonymous wrote:You need to have a conversation with your child about how she communicated about the cost with her friends. If she swears she had the conversation, she can ask the friends to pay her. If the friends don't pay, your DD should pay.

What activity costs $30?

Before I asked the parents I would tell your DD. I wonder if she was less clear with her friends than she is representing to you. If you tell her you are going to ask the parents for payment and she tries to stop you, I’d assume maybe she didn’t actually give her friends all the information. Then it is a different problem and if you DD wasn’t very up front describing the cost to her friends it is not reasonable to expect the parents to reimburse you.

Anonymous wrote:If I were the parent of one of the "moochers", I would not have a problem with either my daughter's friend or parent reaching out for payment.

I would be happy to pay.

+1

But if I were OP, I’d want to see my daughter’s text message to her friends telling them they would need to pay the $30. If that wasn’t made clear, then as OP I would absorb cost.

I would let it slide this time. Are you sure the parents of the kids your daughter invited have never done that for you kid?

I used to sweat that stuff. Now we have more money and I'd let it slide. I'd say the answer depends on how much you need that money.