I see this in my kids 5th grade class. We were there for group presentations and the boys were nuts. So much interruption etc. I think boys just don’t mature that fast. Plus teachers do a lot less correcting of behavior (same goes for parents) and everyone feeling good about themselves seems to be the focus of the class. There aren’t consequences for anything. Plus half the kids have IEPs so they’re isn’t any thing to be done. I understand why teachers are quitting in high numbers before they even reach five years.

My go-to for inappropriate comments from kids/teens is, "Excuse me?" If the kid doesn't react, I say, "What you said is rude. If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything. Do you understand?"

Some kids are really forward with grownups, but they should never call them names or insult them to their faces. Developmentally normal behavior would be whispering that out of earshot, not saying it to OP's face. Kid could be on the spectrum. OP is not out of line for addressing it.

The kid's parents might have thrown their hands up in the air trying to deal with that behavior, but that doesn't mean society at large should ignore it. That kid will need to learn to tone it down when he is out in the workforce someday, and that learning starts now.

4th grade was when the kids taught our DCs almost every swear word out there.

I would have mad escary spooky noises and acted like a ghost

IME 4th graders (and other ages) are learning how to express themselves. Often this means they don't use the words very precisely. I generally ask my child to explain what they meant by whatever term they used that didn't seem appropriate. If they need prompting I would ask if they meant scary like spooky movie that has a surprise which made them jump, or something else. If this were my kid and they'd had a chance to better explain what they meant I suspect you would have felt better about the situation. But I'm sorry this happened to you and your child. Not fun for anyone.

Yeah, you're not ok.

There are some bad apples in 4th grade. But, also there are some in 5th, 6th, etc.
It’s not all, but there are definitely boys with very bad behavior. No doubt.

Are you sure he didn’t mean it in the context of scarier as in your child is scary smart? And yes, I have heard my kid describe to other kids as scary smart as in wicked smart or very smart or hella smart.

Anonymous wrote:Divorce him.

Divorce him.

Anonymous wrote:You do sound scary OP. To be this put off by a comment from a 4th grader is unhinged.

What a jerky thing to say. You would fit right in with that rude jerk of a kid.

Anonymous wrote:OP, one child said something and you are asking if all children are like this? Yet, there were other children present who didn’t say anything. This makes no sense.

Typical Karen crap

Anonymous wrote:I think it's great OP said something. The kid is old enough to know better - he said that because he thought he could, without consequences. The adult noticing and saying something was the appropriate consequence.

But OP said the wrong thing! Trust me, that 4th grade boy didn't learn any lessons from OP's response.

OP, one child said something and you are asking if all children are like this? Yet, there were other children present who didn’t say anything. This makes no sense.