Anonymous wrote:America really is full of temporarily embarrassed millionaires.

This is the actual Steinbeck quote:
“Except for the field organizers of strikes, who were pretty tough monkeys and devoted, most of the so-called Communists I met were middle-class, middle-aged people playing a game of dreams. I remember a woman in easy circumstances saying to another even more affluent: ‘After the revolution even we will have more, won’t we, dear?’ Then there was another lover of proletarians who used to raise hell with Sunday picknickers on her property.

I guess the trouble was that we didn’t have any self-admitted proletarians. Everyone was a temporarily embarrassed capitalist. Maybe the Communists so closely questioned by the investigation committees were a danger to America, but the ones I knew—at least they claimed to be Communists—couldn’t have disrupted a Sunday-school picnic. Besides they were too busy fighting among themselves.”

America really is full of temporarily embarrassed millionaires.

OP, the entire thread is telling you this is a bad idea, but you clearly want to do it anyway. So just do it and deal with the consequences.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Quick breakdown:

$185k
-$40k taxes
-$30k mortgage
-$10k food
-$5k gas
-$20k other misc. expenses
-$10k private school tuition
=that leaves $70k left to save, invest, etc. What am I missing?

10k food? For a family of 5? And it's $30k private school tuition, not 10. No travel, no insurance, not even retirement savings accounted for here.

The level of fuzzy math you're resorting to should answer your question for you, but like I said: magical thinking.

We don't travel, food is under $200/wk currently (Costco) so that figure is accurate, although it will go up somewhat when the baby starts solids, and I explicitly wrote at the end the remainder includes savings, etc. Tuition is not $30k/yr until the other two kids are older enough for Kindergarten, and at that point the income figure should be higher as well.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Quick breakdown:

$185k
-$40k taxes
-$30k mortgage
-$10k food
-$5k gas
-$20k other misc. expenses
-$10k private school tuition
=that leaves $70k left to save, invest, etc. What am I missing?

Where is this 2.5k/m mortgaged home for a family of 5? This is like 1-bedroom apartment in DC.

Anyone who bought before 2020?

Anonymous wrote:Quick breakdown:

$185k
-$40k taxes
-$30k mortgage
-$10k food
-$5k gas
-$20k other misc. expenses
-$10k private school tuition
=that leaves $70k left to save, invest, etc. What am I missing?

Where is this 2.5k/m mortgaged home for a family of 5? This is like 1-bedroom apartment in DC.

Anonymous wrote:Quick breakdown:

$185k
-$40k taxes
-$30k mortgage
-$10k food
-$5k gas
-$20k other misc. expenses
-$10k private school tuition
=that leaves $70k left to save, invest, etc. What am I missing?

10k food? For a family of 5? And it's $30k private school tuition, not 10. No travel, no insurance, not even retirement savings accounted for here.

The level of fuzzy math you're resorting to should answer your question for you, but like I said: magical thinking.

Quick breakdown:

$185k
-$40k taxes
-$30k mortgage
-$10k food
-$5k gas
-$20k other misc. expenses
-$10k private school tuition
=that leaves $70k left to save, invest, etc. What am I missing?

We sent one to private school for $10K per year many years ago when our income was $250K and that was a struggle. I can't imagine how you can pull this off honestly OP. Granted, for us, DH is in consulting and income pretty much quadrupled since then. Now with our last one in high school at $45K per year, it is a drop in the bucket. Still, based on what I am reading, your income potential isn't such that you can pull this off. And I am a big proponent for private schools. Can you ask the grandparents if they can fully fund? Are they very wealthy?

Nope no way.. you kid and your family may LOVE the private school and it will be difficult for you to pull the kid out later.

It's like trying a business class flight to Asia the first time, you will always be unhappy and feel lesser if you can't afford it anymore. So don't buy tickets for business class if you can't afford to buy them again.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thank you for the honesty. What if we sent just one kid to private school, and the other two went to public school at least for K–6th grade?

That seems a bit unfair to the other kids, unless there is a serious learning issue (I mean serious!). The siblings will resent the one that gets the private school.

I'd suggest sending them all to public for K-6. See how it goes. You obviously think your K-6 is good, since you are willing to send 2 of your kids there. SO assuming you are not a troll (I think from this statement you just might be), send all 3 kids to public from K-6 and see where you are financially and with retirement and college savings at that point. Ask grandparents to contribute the $$$ they were willing to put towards private school towards college fund, or at least to save it for possible private MS/HS.

We really like the private school that the oldest got into and it is highly competitive. The logic behind sending the oldest to this private is that (1) turning it down now might doom our chances of sending any of the three there, ever, and (2) having a sibling there could give the other two kids an edge in the admissions process if they want to transfer there, as it is very difficult to enter after K when there are few spots available. I think our public ES is fine, but our public MS has a lot of issues.

Save 10K a year per child so that you can move to a better school district for middle school.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thank you for the honesty. What if we sent just one kid to private school, and the other two went to public school at least for K–6th grade?

That seems a bit unfair to the other kids, unless there is a serious learning issue (I mean serious!). The siblings will resent the one that gets the private school.

I'd suggest sending them all to public for K-6. See how it goes. You obviously think your K-6 is good, since you are willing to send 2 of your kids there. SO assuming you are not a troll (I think from this statement you just might be), send all 3 kids to public from K-6 and see where you are financially and with retirement and college savings at that point. Ask grandparents to contribute the $$$ they were willing to put towards private school towards college fund, or at least to save it for possible private MS/HS.

We really like the private school that the oldest got into and it is highly competitive. The logic behind sending the oldest to this private is that (1) turning it down now might doom our chances of sending any of the three there, ever, and (2) having a sibling there could give the other two kids an edge in the admissions process if they want to transfer there, as it is very difficult to enter after K when there are few spots available. I think our public ES is fine, but our public MS has a lot of issues.

I think this is very strong logic. Given how young your family is, I feel like you should follow through on this plan. Can always transfer from private to public very easily vice versa not so much. This decision is also very dependent on the strength of your local public schools. DCPS has some good elementary schools, ok middle schools and not good high schools so would prioritize private for older years there but MCPS is probably strongest in high school so private school might be more beneficial earlier on.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Private school cost after aid and grandparent contributions is $10k per year per kid for K-6; will double to $20k for grades 7-12.

Three kids. Gross HHI of $185k on upward trajectory. Mortgage costs $30k per year. No car loans or other major expenses.

So, I'm a huge advocate of public school plus 2x / week weekly tutoring. We pay $175 / hr for our tutoring (he's amazing! - massive test score increases and progress for my kid), and we probably see him 30 weeks out of the year. Probably comes out to close to $10k / year (maybe get Grandparents to pay for this instead and save yourself the $40k / year associated with private school).

This is what we do. Kids are thriving and going on fancy vacations

I wouldn't do it, but I will admit that I prioritize structure and stability for my kids over a LOT. I would never want to be in a situation where a job loss also means they need to leave their school community.

I wouldn't count on the grandparents being able to afford to send all three of your children to private school for 12 to 13 years. I'm sure they mean well but that's a hard thing to sign up for.

It's possible they're super rich, but I'd imagine they'd just pay for the whole thing if that were the case