Anonymous wrote:I volunteer at a soup kitchen occasionally. Most people who come through are men. Last week we had a woman with 4 kids ages 1 through 5 come in. She had nowhere to go afterwards and the shelter was full. Out of kindness I got her an inexpensive room ($250) for the week to get them off the streets for a bit and so she could start getting paperwork in. Yesterday 4 people at the soup kitchen asked me for money for a room. This lady told people at this motel that I paid for her room and where to find me. I am not going to volunteer for a while and have learned my lesson about being nice.

it's called compassion fatigue. And don't feel bad -- No one, not even the California state government, can spend enough money to solve this problem

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's a guy who always sits on a bucket at the intersection near my office. A coworker once took him some food and she returned to work covered in the drink with a fat lip. The guy threw it at her and screamed "my sign says any amount will help not I need food, you dumb c*nt!"

I think about that incident all the time when I see someone asking for help.

A lot of these people are on the streets because of mental health issues. I give them a wide berth.

Why do people insist on calling it mental health issues when it's clearly an entitled a-hole issue?

You don’t think entitled a-holes have mental health issues?

Money and privilege can buy you a lot of things, can’t they? That seems to include being called “driven” instead of “crazy”.

I learned the hard way there is a difference between doing good deeds with though and being totally naive. You have to be street smart. You let her know it's a one time thing and you pay in cash so if she does damages you aren't responsible. You know the risks-she will tell others, she will ask for more and you have a plan for how to have boundaries.

You can feel good you did something generous and have boundaries. I appreciate the people I help out who simply say thank you. I have had those who then expected more, more more and tried to manipulate me or whatever. I can still feel good that I tried to help, while also feeling secure in saying, I am sorry, that is all I can offer.

Not to mention that a mother with kids is the first to be housed by social services. She just needs to ask and they will put her in a hotel.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's a guy who always sits on a bucket at the intersection near my office. A coworker once took him some food and she returned to work covered in the drink with a fat lip. The guy threw it at her and screamed "my sign says any amount will help not I need food, you dumb c*nt!"

I think about that incident all the time when I see someone asking for help.

A lot of these people are on the streets because of mental health issues. I give them a wide berth.

Why do people insist on calling it mental health issues when it's clearly an entitled a-hole issue?

Anonymous wrote:There's a guy who always sits on a bucket at the intersection near my office. A coworker once took him some food and she returned to work covered in the drink with a fat lip. The guy threw it at her and screamed "my sign says any amount will help not I need food, you dumb c*nt!"

I think about that incident all the time when I see someone asking for help.

😲
Wow.
Just wow.

What a horrible outcome for your coworker OP!
Talk about no good deed……

I am sorry to hear what happened to you.
Your ❤️ was obviously in a very sincere place & it was a lovely gesture that you did.

Please keep that in mind.
Try to focus on the selfless act of kindness you did and just pray that you never become jaded.

OP—read my post at” Off Topics” about Kindness Counts.

Sometimes it doesn’t work out and we become less inclined to help others. At other times, kindness is absorbed just as intended, and everyone grows from it.

Sorry about your experience. I’ve been there. But I also recognize there are good people out there who will not take advantage.

Anonymous wrote:SO 4 kids had a roof for a week and you're annoyed because 4 other people wanted in on it.

PP, when was the last time you went out of your way to help people in need? Please tell us.

Anonymous wrote:What did you think would happen?

A thread denigrating the awful and “crazy” poors, I think. Oh, with extra oats on the back for OP for being so darned kind!

What did you think would happen?

Anonymous wrote:A room was purchased directly. No money was gifted.

I hope you paid the motel cash and didn't put it on your credit card. When there are damages, she refuses to leave, or takes things with her you are going to get charged on your credit card. Unless you have dealt with people in that situation numerous times, you don't really understand the dynamics. There is most likely a reason no one in her extended family is helping her out. No friends are either. She probably has burned to many bridges