Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not weird, makes sense for him to want his son to be part of the wedding. He’s too old to be a ring bearer.

I asked him if he was giving a speech and he had no idea that best men give speeches...!

That's messed up, why would you do that to your kid? Seems like you're trying to stress him and make him not want to do it. If his dad wants him to say something or do a job I'm sure he'll tell him. Think of it as an honorary role where he'll stand up for his dad. Not traditional. Unless you also told your kid he has to be an adult by the wedding so he can witness the marriage certificate. Just grow up OP. Don't ruin this for your kid. Stay the f out of it unless you are asked. If you have an actual concern mention it to his dad.

I agree.

This has "cranky ex-wife using her own son to try to get back at ex-husband" written all over it.

Shame on you, OP

Anonymous wrote:He gets to plan the bachelor party! 😁

Any maybe they will.

FWIW, when I got married, I was a 28 year old man. We bought really great seats to a Orioles game and then went to a steakhouse for dinner. Nobody got wasted. Nobody went to a strip club. Everyone was in bed by midnight. Sure, maybe it was a little "lame", but it was exactly what I wanted

No reason the Dad and the 13 yo couldn't do something similar with a few uncles/cousins/grandpa/etc

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not weird, makes sense for him to want his son to be part of the wedding. He’s too old to be a ring bearer.

I asked him if he was giving a speech and he had no idea that best men give speeches...!

That's messed up, why would you do that to your kid? Seems like you're trying to stress him and make him not want to do it. If his dad wants him to say something or do a job I'm sure he'll tell him. Think of it as an honorary role where he'll stand up for his dad. Not traditional. Unless you also told your kid he has to be an adult by the wedding so he can witness the marriage certificate. Just grow up OP. Don't ruin this for your kid. Stay the f out of it unless you are asked. If you have an actual concern mention it to his dad.

My teenage stepdaughter was her dad’s Best Girl at our wedding - based on my suggestion. We wanted her to stand up with us, and neither of us wanted or needed a large wedding party - I had a maid of honor and we had a ring bearer and flower girl.

As far as I recall, no one was shocked or appalled.

I was my mom's "MOH" when she got married at 50.

It's mostly symbolic. I dont see the snark. I think its sweet.

Adorable.

It's adorable.

Anonymous wrote:we to a wedding last fall where the 14 yr old son was the groom's best man. And he gave a simple but lovely (and well-prepared) toast. Basically a few soft jokes about the dad, a few lovely things about the bride, a welcome to the family. Cheer

This was my stepson when DH and I got married. He also walked his grandmother down the aisle to be seated. DH's brother stepped up to do a few of the more adult, practical things but my stepson made a very sweet and funny toast, and even danced with me. It was my first wedding but obviously DH's second so there was no crazy bachelor party. He, my stepson and a group of friends went golfing and out to a nice dinner a month or so before the wedding.

If your son is comfortable, it's a lovely way for your ex to indicate how important your son is to him even as he goes into his new marriage.

Anonymous wrote:You’re all assuming that 13 YO is happy about this wedding and his dad’s remarriage. OP I think that is key.

This. I personally think it’s weird for a kid to go to their parent’s or parents’ wedding, but I’m old school. I’ve never had a friend be excited about their parent getting remarried.

This is a beautiful idea. Your DS deserves to feel honored and valued (and maybe a little grown-up) in such an important moment, and this is a really nice way for DS' father to accomplish that. It is also a very clear demonstration that DS will continue to be at the heart of his growing family circle. I hope DS is gaining an even wider group of people who love and value him. And you must be raising a pretty great kid, OP, for him to be entrusted with what we all agree is a significant role in the wedding, too.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The groomsmen have a role to play with things like helping guests to seats, rounding up the right people for group photos. A 13-year-old is a child, not a man.

Oh for crying out loud, have the groomsmen, ushers, or other family or friends play that role. You're ridiculous.

Yes! And why can't a 13 year old help people to their seats? They aren't 3.