Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP sounds ridiculously immature

Did you find out about a close relative's wedding via mailed invitation only? That's normal?

Anonymous wrote:OP sounds ridiculously immature

Anonymous wrote:Now most people send out a save the date card. Have they set up a registry? Just ask the niece if the date is set. If not set, relax.

Anonymous wrote:Just look on The Knot. Type in your niece’s name plus her fiancé’s name and you’ll find the date. Haven’t known a young person to not use this website in years.

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Anonymous wrote:If you know the date, and you plan on going to the wedding, then just buy your airfare.
I’d buy Southwest because it’s the most flexible, and if the wedding doesn’t go through then you can keep the funds for another time, if you book with miles you get the miles back.

Southwest doesn't fly direct to where I'm going. Only 2 carriers fly direct and it's over 5 hours on a plane. Non direct is 8 hours so I avoid that with young kids if at all possible.

Omg you have 2 options:1) just buy the tickets now when prices are good and go regardless of wedding just for a visit if wedding doesn’t happen 2) don’t go! Christ sake.

is!

1) Change fees are $150/ticket so there goes $600 if in fact the date isn't set.

2) I'm going. My niece is a nice person that deserves support despite my sibling being weird.

Then ASK YOUR NIECE what the wedding date is. Cut the drama.

That's what I'm going to do as said in my first post. But I'm venting about why the heck my sibling sucks so much.

Maybe your sibling sucks but you, OP, are a PITA

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you know the date, and you plan on going to the wedding, then just buy your airfare.
I’d buy Southwest because it’s the most flexible, and if the wedding doesn’t go through then you can keep the funds for another time, if you book with miles you get the miles back.

Southwest doesn't fly direct to where I'm going. Only 2 carriers fly direct and it's over 5 hours on a plane. Non direct is 8 hours so I avoid that with young kids if at all possible.

Omg you have 2 options:1) just buy the tickets now when prices are good and go regardless of wedding just for a visit if wedding doesn’t happen 2) don’t go! Christ sake.

is!

1) Change fees are $150/ticket so there goes $600 if in fact the date isn't set.

2) I'm going. My niece is a nice person that deserves support despite my sibling being weird.

Then ASK YOUR NIECE what the wedding date is. Cut the drama.

That's what I'm going to do as said in my first post. But I'm venting about why the heck my sibling sucks so much.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you know the date, and you plan on going to the wedding, then just buy your airfare.
I’d buy Southwest because it’s the most flexible, and if the wedding doesn’t go through then you can keep the funds for another time, if you book with miles you get the miles back.

Southwest doesn't fly direct to where I'm going. Only 2 carriers fly direct and it's over 5 hours on a plane. Non direct is 8 hours so I avoid that with young kids if at all possible.

Omg you have 2 options:1) just buy the tickets now when prices are good and go regardless of wedding just for a visit if wedding doesn’t happen 2) don’t go! Christ sake.

is!

1) Change fees are $150/ticket so there goes $600 if in fact the date isn't set.

2) I'm going. My niece is a nice person that deserves support despite my sibling being weird.

Then ASK YOUR NIECE what the wedding date is. Cut the drama.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you know the date, and you plan on going to the wedding, then just buy your airfare.
I’d buy Southwest because it’s the most flexible, and if the wedding doesn’t go through then you can keep the funds for another time, if you book with miles you get the miles back.

Southwest doesn't fly direct to where I'm going. Only 2 carriers fly direct and it's over 5 hours on a plane. Non direct is 8 hours so I avoid that with young kids if at all possible.

Omg you have 2 options:1) just buy the tickets now when prices are good and go regardless of wedding just for a visit if wedding doesn’t happen 2) don’t go! Christ sake.

is!

1) Change fees are $150/ticket so there goes $600 if in fact the date isn't set.

2) I'm going. My niece is a nice person that deserves support despite my sibling being weird.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you know the date, and you plan on going to the wedding, then just buy your airfare.
I’d buy Southwest because it’s the most flexible, and if the wedding doesn’t go through then you can keep the funds for another time, if you book with miles you get the miles back.

Southwest doesn't fly direct to where I'm going. Only 2 carriers fly direct and it's over 5 hours on a plane. Non direct is 8 hours so I avoid that with young kids if at all possible.

Omg you have 2 options:1) just buy the tickets now when prices are good and go regardless of wedding just for a visit if wedding doesn’t happen 2) don’t go! Christ sake.

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Anonymous wrote:
You're way out of line, OP. If they're not ready to confirm a date, it means you might be out thousands if the date changes, unless you purchase a refundable/movable ticket.

Also, a wedding is a complex event to organize. Your niece has a million things to think about, and as a general rule, brides aren't thinking of one aunt's financial situation and how many times she's flown to visit. If she thinks of you at all, it's perhaps in the opposite way - that you seem so wealthy that travel for you will pose no problem. How is she supposed to read your mind? How is your sister supposed to read your mind? How can anyone accommodate you if you don't explain?

I said that exactly, hey looking to see if the dates are solid because the flight prices are good.

No. You did not explain that you've been tightening your belt and making sacrifices to visit them regularly for years, and that buying tickets to this wedding closer to the date would be a financial burden. Because this is how you've described it to us: that it's a long-festering resentment that your family has not reciprocated your attentions for a long while, and you feel as if you're always the one spending the money and making the effort, so now it's the last straw.

And I'll guess why. It's because it's not a real financial burden, you just like to bean count.
If you have a fit now, you'll be seen as the aunt who likes to draw attention to herself when it's the bride's time to shine.

Nope, I don't engage in drama. I just replied "understood" and won't be asking again.

They didn't come to my wedding so, yeah, tells you a lot about our lopsided relationship.