OP my father was like this - it is 100% misogyny. If he's not doing it at work and to his friends and to the store clerk and postmaster, he's doing it to you because on some level he hates and disrespects women, including the one who probably does most of the housework and who bore his children. It's disgusting.

My brother grew up to be the same kind of husband because our mother never challenged our father - but she did die about 20 years earlier than her family history of longevity would suggest she should have. It's extremely stressful to live walking on eggshells waiting for the next tirade and to live in the absence of affection but the presence of constant contempt.

After 30 years of watching my parents marriage I estranged myself from them - my mother had cried on my shoulder from the time I was preteen every time he abused her, but when he and my brother abused me in the same way, she would get snide and basically tell me to suck it up. After 30 years I had almost as much contempt for her as I did for my father and brother.

If you have a daughter, what in the world do you think she is learning from this? And don't pretend your kids don't know. You're a fool if you think that.

Leave him.. Divorce and live separately. You will have peace. Your kids will be relieved to be free of the dynamic. Get out before he has a stroke or serious heart attack and you’re stuck being his caretaker.

Just leave. Sorry you’re dealing with this. It will not improve.

Oh, and my ex would also narrate into the audio. It was hard living together. Now I thu j it’s so ridiculous I chuckle.

Anonymous wrote:Get a go pro and tape everything. Send around footage of his mentally ill outbursts.

Since you are wearing the camera in his head he knows he’s being taped. So two things, it will Big Brother him into a more normal speaking style, or you can use the footage of his Rages however you wish.

I guess I third thing can happened as did with my HFA/Bipolar spouse. He starts narrating total falsities as if he’s acting in a play for the camera. Of course he is the victim.

Mentally ill men are so very ill.

My husband did this to me. But he didn’t tell me. He would get very quiet while he taped. He almost didn’t say anything when I asked for a response. It would drive me crazy.

I would never deal with that. I'd leave.

Good luck, OP.

OP, sincere question, why are you still with him?

Secondly, if you decide to stay, STOP trying to get him to be able to have a normal conversation about door locks, traffic, etc. Practice acceptance, you cannot control him. Just focus on doing what YOU want to do and leave him alone.

I don't think you are "nagging" or being unreasonable - we should be able to ask our spouse to lock the frickin door on their way out - but obvs. that is not working in your home.