Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m reading the Valentines Reminder differently. It says no candy because of allergies (which seems like a necessary health precaution and culturally neutral) and to remember that not everyone celebrates Valentines.

It doesn’t say that your child can’t celebrate, or even that the class won’t celebrate together, just that some people prefer not to celebrate. I’d see it as a heads-up to warn the kids not to get offended or think it weird if someone doesn’t give them a valentine or doesn’t want to accept one.

I’d suggest e-mailing the teacher for clarification.

OP here, and I agree that maybe there is a more charitable interpretation than how I initially read it and I hope you are right. However, for context, they made it very clear elsewhere there will be no class party and the class will not celebrate together, so I do know that that is part of the intended message.

Also, to be clear, I of course completely understand the candy issue and have no problem with skipping that due to allergies. It's the larger messaging that seems to signal (and I could be over-interpreting, but this is one of many such emails) that "certain specific holidays are arbitrarily not welcome here" that bothers me.

Anonymous wrote:Why is there secular Christmas but Hanukkah gets to have a religious symbol of a menorah? The nativity is banned.

Some things seriously puzzle me but whatever.

Anonymous wrote:Just because a holiday has "religious roots" somewhere in the dim past doesn't mean anyone who celebrates it now thinks it has any religious meaning. Halloween was fun at school - dressing up, parade and parties. Valentine's Day was all about friendship and caring, cards for everyone and parties. I find it so depressing that these kind of things can no longer happen at school because of this idea that absolutely everything we do has to include absolutely everyone.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree with the Op and think parents in this area should push back on these kind of messages with an undercurrent of you can celebrate but don’t enjoy it. In other parts of the country schools still have Halloween and horrors - Christmas 😱 secular version of course.

I mean people really believe that things should be inclusive then they should accept standard black and white American kids who celebrate halloween, valentine’s day, christmas, thanksgiving, etc

And include all the other holidays that other kids celebrate

Secular Christmas. Standard black and white American kids. Hoo boy.

Anonymous wrote:I agree with you too, OP. If I were to move my family to India, I absolutely would expect them to celebrate Diwali in school. Or for it not to be taboo. Why can’t the same be said for Halloween and Valentines?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So tell if I am being unreasonable to be annoyed here--

DC is in elementary school that frequently touts the beauty and joy of "sharing your culture." At one point, parents were invited in to "share an activity from your culture." As a result of that invitation, my kid brought home a little lantern they made in celebration of Diwali.

And yet, when it comes to mainstream secular holidays like Halloween or Valentines Day, we get emails like this:

Valentine's Reminder

As Valentine's Day approaches, let's be mindful of our school community's inclusive approach to celebrations. While the holiday is often celebrated with parties, distributing Valentines, and treats, it's important to recognize its religious roots, and that not all members of our community may observe it. Additionally, due to serious allergies, our school has a no-candy policy in classrooms.

We got a similar message around Halloween. I can't help but get the feeling, based on these emails, that if I took up the teacher on one of these invitations to "share my culture" around Halloween or Valentines Day or any other secular take on a mainstream American holiday (e.g. Christmas), it would not be well-received. I am all for my kid learning and celebrating other cultures, but this feels like a double standard.

Frankly, I find it annoying that we not allowed to have any common celebration with these holidays. I remember Halloween and Valentines Day as some of my most fun in-school experiences and this feels like they are caving to an unreasonably intolerant minority. Obviously we can and still do invite classmates over to celebrate these holidays at home, but that is not quite the same.

Thoughts?

Is this what people call white grievance? It sure seems like a MAGA issue.

Anonymous wrote:I agree with the Op and think parents in this area should push back on these kind of messages with an undercurrent of you can celebrate but don’t enjoy it. In other parts of the country schools still have Halloween and horrors - Christmas 😱 secular version of course.

I mean people really believe that things should be inclusive then they should accept standard black and white American kids who celebrate halloween, valentine’s day, christmas, thanksgiving, etc

And include all the other holidays that other kids celebrate

Anonymous wrote:So tell if I am being unreasonable to be annoyed here--

DC is in elementary school that frequently touts the beauty and joy of "sharing your culture." At one point, parents were invited in to "share an activity from your culture." As a result of that invitation, my kid brought home a little lantern they made in celebration of Diwali.

And yet, when it comes to mainstream secular holidays like Halloween or Valentines Day, we get emails like this:

Valentine's Reminder

As Valentine's Day approaches, let's be mindful of our school community's inclusive approach to celebrations. While the holiday is often celebrated with parties, distributing Valentines, and treats, it's important to recognize its religious roots, and that not all members of our community may observe it. Additionally, due to serious allergies, our school has a no-candy policy in classrooms.

We got a similar message around Halloween. I can't help but get the feeling, based on these emails, that if I took up the teacher on one of these invitations to "share my culture" around Halloween or Valentines Day or any other secular take on a mainstream American holiday (e.g. Christmas), it would not be well-received. I am all for my kid learning and celebrating other cultures, but this feels like a double standard.

Frankly, I find it annoying that we not allowed to have any common celebration with these holidays. I remember Halloween and Valentines Day as some of my most fun in-school experiences and this feels like they are caving to an unreasonably intolerant minority. Obviously we can and still do invite classmates over to celebrate these holidays at home, but that is not quite the same.

Thoughts?

Anonymous wrote:I agree OP. In my opinion, Valentines and Halloween are American celebrations that are only very loosely tied to religions. Growing up, every religion (except Jehovah’s Witness) celebrated them and they were just fun class parties. Now we are trying too hard to be PC and are not making anyone happy.

Honoring and learning about other cultures is fantastic, but we should not need to erase the American customs to do that.