Anonymous wrote:What you did was entirely unnecessary understandable, OP. You have my sympathy.

CPS isn’t going to do a darn thing.

Her father and the therapist acted correctly in this situation.

Learn some psychology to outwit your difficult teen, and hang in there!

Anonymous wrote:I would change your story to when she threw water on your face you moved and threw up your hands because you thought she might throw the glass and your hand glanced her cheek. Could it have happened like that?

I would stick to that story if cos is involved. That’s what they are going to want to hear to close the case. Get the other sibling on board with it was a chaotic night. Did you te t or leave a message to anyone with a different version?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oppositional defiant disorder, OP.

This.

And returning violence in this situation will only escalate her ODD.

It’s not uncommon with kids who have split families. It happens in other situations as well. It’s fairly common but it doesn’t have to be a permanent condition.

Anonymous wrote:13 yr old dd is snarky, mean and entitled. She disrespects authority, doesn't take consequences seriously and lacks true remorse. On the otherhand, she can act incredibly polished, polite and charming to strangers. Recently we had a situation where she threw a glass of water on her sibling/me during dinner, and when I took her phone privilege away for a week, she took my phone and hid it saying I can't have my phone until she gets hers back. In the ensuing argument, tempers rose, lot of F word, and when she called me a f*ing B, I lost it and smacked her in the face. She called my ex who came to pick her up. He had her go speak to her therapist who reported me to the CPS. I am still waiting for a visit (its been 2 days) but I am heartbroken how this has turned out. I regret smacking her on the cheek and plan to apologize when I see her but I am concerned about her behavior. Her iphone has been returned and there is no consequence to her behavior which was unacceptable. I'm wracked with anxiety waiting for the CPS to come. Any advice? Your thoughts? I am full of regret and sadness.

Anonymous wrote:I'm in shock about how many people here are condoning child abuse. If an adult slapped another adult it would absolutely be an arrest able assault and battery. Why do you think that is OK? If a husband slaps a wife because she said something rude, that would have to be OK too. WTAF is wrong with you people? This is much worse to do to a child than an adult and can have lasting life-long repercussions.

Emotionally mature adults don't slap anyone for words. She's been traumatized already by a divorce and now her mother slaps her in the face too. The therapist had to report this. Nothing will happen to you as a result (other than relationship deterioration) but it absolutely was child abuse. I promise you she will never forget that you did that and you have lost any chance of her respecting you. You can't discipline well without their respect, all you can do now is punish her. Your emotional immaturity needs therapy asap.

Anonymous wrote:We had to deal with a cps worker once - nephew telling false stories for attention regarding his extended family. They visited my daughter at school and interviewed her first. Then contacted me. The interview they had with my daughter pretty much exonerated us as parents fully, so we did go ahead and cooperate. My husband talked to his mom and got really worked up/wanted to get a lawyer/deny the interview but I thought that would make it all worse and make us look guilty. Which we weren’t

Anonymous wrote:OP here (I think my previous post got buried so posting again) Wow, thank you all for all your input and perspectives, good and bad. I take everything I read here with an open mind and heart. My ex undermines my parenting by always coming to take her away when she calls him when I am mad at her. She used to call me to be picked up when she fought with her father, but I wanted to respect his space for parenting, so I rarely did. I know exactly how exasperated he must be feeling, and I know he needed to parent in his own way. His insecurities about parenting are at the root of all this, so he needs to feel like a "hero" protecting his daughter. Re the iphone, he bought it for her and asked for it back and gave it back to her despite my telling him that I took away her phone privileges. Also, regarding the therapist, I don't know if my ex knew she would call the CPS when he asked her to see my dd to talk about what happened. I want to think he didn't and was surprised as much as me. The therapist is young and inexperienced. She probably went by the book and could not see the nuances of the actual need at that moment, which was to bring the family together instead of the knee-jerk reaction. She only reacted to the corporeal punishment (slap) and could not see the bigger picture. In my book, she failed as a therapist because she ultimately caused more harm than good. Lastly, I am reading mixed advice about CPS. It has been over 48 hours and no visit. I want to think they dropped the case, but should I not talk to them if they do visit?