Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I think this needs context. Did he introduce you as his "friend" and treat you as though you were "just a friend"? Or did he introduce you as his friend and interact with you as if you were his love interest (weird wording, I know, but I'm struggling to come up with something other than girlfriend given how controversial that seems to be here)? Did he put his arm around you, make sure to get you a drink, look at you with affection, talk you up, etc? Or did he treat you the same way he treated everyone else there?
It was clear through body language, kisses, tending to me that we are romantic. I didn’t feel he was denying we are romantic. I just felt like…here’s another random chick I’m screwing….when he called me his friend.
Anonymous wrote:He should have referred to you as his current piece of ass.
Anonymous wrote:Normally I would say that you had every right to be miffed at this - but considering he was very affectionate toward you while in their company, then I wouldn’t think twice about this one.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Have the two of you discussed how you want to label yourselves? If not, I can understand why he didn’t want to be presumptuous and call you his GF. Use your words and talk to him.
We have discussed it before and didn’t see eye to eye. He thinks boyfriend/girlfriend is some HUGE title. He see it the way I see being engaged. The day to day of our relationship is very good. We act like a couple and as far as I can tell (and from his words) he isn’t seeing anyone else. I guess I just have to deal with this “friend” thing. But for me it’s annoying. Titles are a form of respect in my eyes. An even though our relationship emotionally progresses there is a part of me that has a hard time taking him seriously as a potential partner because he keeps calling me his friend.
You should have mentioned this in your first post, OP. It's so irritating when people do this - it changes the entire tenor of the issue. This is a big problem. He doesn't want to commit, even with words.
Apologies for not making the original post longer. The odd thing is that he is very committed in deeds. He initiates spending a ton of time together, plans dates, is always there for me when I need him, invites me into his social life, brings me to work events, considers me in the future, etc. He is just adamant about not calling me his girlfriend. That leads me to be confused on whether I should just continue and be happy because we get along very well, or if this word hang up is indicative of a larger commitment problem.
NP - he’s pulling this crap in his 40s? Hell no. If he were in his early 20s, I might give him a pass for immaturity. That’s a total deal-breaker for a man in his 40s to behave this way.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Have the two of you discussed how you want to label yourselves? If not, I can understand why he didn’t want to be presumptuous and call you his GF. Use your words and talk to him.
We have discussed it before and didn’t see eye to eye. He thinks boyfriend/girlfriend is some HUGE title. He see it the way I see being engaged. The day to day of our relationship is very good. We act like a couple and as far as I can tell (and from his words) he isn’t seeing anyone else. I guess I just have to deal with this “friend” thing. But for me it’s annoying. Titles are a form of respect in my eyes. An even though our relationship emotionally progresses there is a part of me that has a hard time taking him seriously as a potential partner because he keeps calling me his friend.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Have the two of you discussed how you want to label yourselves? If not, I can understand why he didn’t want to be presumptuous and call you his GF. Use your words and talk to him.
We have discussed it before and didn’t see eye to eye. He thinks boyfriend/girlfriend is some HUGE title. He see it the way I see being engaged. The day to day of our relationship is very good. We act like a couple and as far as I can tell (and from his words) he isn’t seeing anyone else. I guess I just have to deal with this “friend” thing. But for me it’s annoying. Titles are a form of respect in my eyes. An even though our relationship emotionally progresses there is a part of me that has a hard time taking him seriously as a potential partner because he keeps calling me his friend.
You should have mentioned this in your first post, OP. It's so irritating when people do this - it changes the entire tenor of the issue. This is a big problem. He doesn't want to commit, even with words.
Apologies for not making the original post longer. The odd thing is that he is very committed in deeds. He initiates spending a ton of time together, plans dates, is always there for me when I need him, invites me into his social life, brings me to work events, considers me in the future, etc. He is just adamant about not calling me his girlfriend. That leads me to be confused on whether I should just continue and be happy because we get along very well, or if this word hang up is indicative of a larger commitment problem.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Have the two of you discussed how you want to label yourselves? If not, I can understand why he didn’t want to be presumptuous and call you his GF. Use your words and talk to him.
We have discussed it before and didn’t see eye to eye. He thinks boyfriend/girlfriend is some HUGE title. He see it the way I see being engaged. The day to day of our relationship is very good. We act like a couple and as far as I can tell (and from his words) he isn’t seeing anyone else. I guess I just have to deal with this “friend” thing. But for me it’s annoying. Titles are a form of respect in my eyes. An even though our relationship emotionally progresses there is a part of me that has a hard time taking him seriously as a potential partner because he keeps calling me his friend.
You should have mentioned this in your first post, OP. It's so irritating when people do this - it changes the entire tenor of the issue. This is a big problem. He doesn't want to commit, even with words.