Anonymous
11/07/2023 11:22
Subject: Visiting high reaches
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:and yet those who got in the ivies are Nigerian doctor’s kids and Obama’s daughters instead of kids you mentioned. When are we gonna stop lying about “equity “?Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:We went to a few ivies because the DDs school admissions officer thought she should and DD decided that she didn’t like the vibe, or the size, and didn’t apply to any Ivies. Asian kid, 1 year pre Supreme Court decision, so the deck was stacked again and she really didn’t stand a chance. Better for her that she didn’t set her heart on it. So visiting some Ivies WAS helpful, in a backwards way.
Your child doesn’t have the deck stacked against her. Going to Binghamton instead of Yale isn’t a hardship. There are kids who really have the deck stacked against them - born into generational poverty, a parent with substance abuse, a parent incarcerated, violent homes/communities, homeless, food insecure. Just stop already.
Even if those kids don't get into Yale or Harvard, it is THOSE kids who have life stacked against them. Majority of kids on DCUM (ie parents posting on DCUM) are privileged and don't really know what it's like to experience a rough, challenging life and to have the deck of life stacked against them. the fact their parent is concerned about what college they attend shows they have the support to go far in life.
So what’s wrong for PP to claim the unfair disadvantage by ivies? Only one group of people can be disadvantaged?
The PP would be much happier in life if they were not so obsessed with "unfair advantage for the disadvantaged" Even if Harvard and Yale did not focus on increasing "disadvantaged attendance", your privileged kid still would only have a single digit chance of acceptance. Not like changing that will give everyone a 30-40% chance.
And no, a rich/UMC kid whose parents both attended college and are concerned with getting them into a T20 school is not really "disadvantaged" in life. Anymore so than their kid is disadvantaged that they have to drive a Honda instead of a Tesla.
+1
Anonymous
11/07/2023 10:51
Subject: Visiting high reaches
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Visited Harvard. Disappointed and not impressed. It was immediately dropped from consideration. It's not a waste. Helps to narrow the list and realize things you may never have learned without an in-person visit.
Ha ha ha. I’m sure Harvard was devastated.
It really isn't for everyone. The campus is so-so. And then there are all the tourists. Harvard Square isn't what it used to be. And the school is clearly focused on its graduate programs. A visit is a good thing to do to make things clear. For a good undergrad experience, Harvard is not where it's at for a lot of smart kids. Visits are clarifying
+1
My engineering kid visited Cornell and wanted to like it. But just couldn't. The campus is in the middle of nowhere (we are not east coast)---the drive from Boston with stops in NY at various schools showed us it truly was middle of nowhere. They were not giving tours, were not helpful with any questions, just had a "we don't care attitude---our acceptance rate is single digits and we don't need you to apply" Did not get anyone who was helpful on the tour, the students on campus (it was summer) did not seem "happy". So for my kid, it helped make decision to not apply.
We did 10 campuses in a week, and this was by far the "worst experience" short of "Troy NY sucks and no way in Hell am I living in this town for 4 years" (I agree Ithaca is a much better college town).
My kid had a completely opposite visit. Visited Cornell last fall on a school trip for students studying hospitality. Had tours with current students and meetings with admissions officers. Peak foliage. Met professors at lunch. My kid came back so excited.
Just applied ED for the hotel admin program. 🙏
Well Cornell's Hotel Admin program is unique and top notch. While Cornell Engineering is "good", there are many many other great options that are not as cut-throat and will provide guidance to the undergrads. My kid wanted to be somewhere that wants them, not somewhere "that they should just be happy to have gotten a spot". They found that and are incredibly happy.
If they give you a spot, doesn't it mean they want you? Nice way to say you couldn't get in
Anonymous
11/07/2023 10:29
Subject: Visiting high reaches
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Visited Harvard. Disappointed and not impressed. It was immediately dropped from consideration. It's not a waste. Helps to narrow the list and realize things you may never have learned without an in-person visit.
Ha ha ha. I’m sure Harvard was devastated.
It really isn't for everyone. The campus is so-so. And then there are all the tourists. Harvard Square isn't what it used to be. And the school is clearly focused on its graduate programs. A visit is a good thing to do to make things clear. For a good undergrad experience, Harvard is not where it's at for a lot of smart kids. Visits are clarifying
Your opinion matters only after you’ve been accepted.
nope---matters before. If a kid doesn't like the campus and environment, then they can cross it off their list. Whole point is kids should apply to schools they actually are excited to attend. Not just apply to "highly ranked schools".
Anonymous
11/07/2023 10:28
Subject: Visiting high reaches
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Visited Harvard. Disappointed and not impressed. It was immediately dropped from consideration. It's not a waste. Helps to narrow the list and realize things you may never have learned without an in-person visit.
Ha ha ha. I’m sure Harvard was devastated.
It really isn't for everyone. The campus is so-so. And then there are all the tourists. Harvard Square isn't what it used to be. And the school is clearly focused on its graduate programs. A visit is a good thing to do to make things clear. For a good undergrad experience, Harvard is not where it's at for a lot of smart kids. Visits are clarifying
+1
My engineering kid visited Cornell and wanted to like it. But just couldn't. The campus is in the middle of nowhere (we are not east coast)---the drive from Boston with stops in NY at various schools showed us it truly was middle of nowhere. They were not giving tours, were not helpful with any questions, just had a "we don't care attitude---our acceptance rate is single digits and we don't need you to apply" Did not get anyone who was helpful on the tour, the students on campus (it was summer) did not seem "happy". So for my kid, it helped make decision to not apply.
We did 10 campuses in a week, and this was by far the "worst experience" short of "Troy NY sucks and no way in Hell am I living in this town for 4 years" (I agree Ithaca is a much better college town).
My kid had a completely opposite visit. Visited Cornell last fall on a school trip for students studying hospitality. Had tours with current students and meetings with admissions officers. Peak foliage. Met professors at lunch. My kid came back so excited.
Just applied ED for the hotel admin program. 🙏
Well Cornell's Hotel Admin program is unique and top notch. While Cornell Engineering is "good", there are many many other great options that are not as cut-throat and will provide guidance to the undergrads. My kid wanted to be somewhere that wants them, not somewhere "that they should just be happy to have gotten a spot". They found that and are incredibly happy.
Anonymous
11/07/2023 10:21
Subject: Visiting high reaches
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Visited Harvard. Disappointed and not impressed. It was immediately dropped from consideration. It's not a waste. Helps to narrow the list and realize things you may never have learned without an in-person visit.
Ha ha ha. I’m sure Harvard was devastated.
It really isn't for everyone. The campus is so-so. And then there are all the tourists. Harvard Square isn't what it used to be. And the school is clearly focused on its graduate programs. A visit is a good thing to do to make things clear. For a good undergrad experience, Harvard is not where it's at for a lot of smart kids. Visits are clarifying
+1
My engineering kid visited Cornell and wanted to like it. But just couldn't. The campus is in the middle of nowhere (we are not east coast)---the drive from Boston with stops in NY at various schools showed us it truly was middle of nowhere. They were not giving tours, were not helpful with any questions, just had a "we don't care attitude---our acceptance rate is single digits and we don't need you to apply" Did not get anyone who was helpful on the tour, the students on campus (it was summer) did not seem "happy". So for my kid, it helped make decision to not apply.
We did 10 campuses in a week, and this was by far the "worst experience" short of "Troy NY sucks and no way in Hell am I living in this town for 4 years" (I agree Ithaca is a much better college town).
+1
I think Cornell is also so big, that it is like a city unto itself. They give zero personal attention, which was striking after being somewhat coddled at even mid-tier SLAC’s.
yes, my kid quickly realized they were going to target schools that do give personal attention and care about the undergrads and mostly in the 5-8K undergrad range. As an engineer, SLAC were not their thing. Happy my kid recognized that on tours and chose not to apply to Cornell---they would have been miserable there
Anonymous
11/07/2023 10:18
Subject: Visiting high reaches
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:and yet those who got in the ivies are Nigerian doctor’s kids and Obama’s daughters instead of kids you mentioned. When are we gonna stop lying about “equity “?Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:We went to a few ivies because the DDs school admissions officer thought she should and DD decided that she didn’t like the vibe, or the size, and didn’t apply to any Ivies. Asian kid, 1 year pre Supreme Court decision, so the deck was stacked again and she really didn’t stand a chance. Better for her that she didn’t set her heart on it. So visiting some Ivies WAS helpful, in a backwards way.
Your child doesn’t have the deck stacked against her. Going to Binghamton instead of Yale isn’t a hardship. There are kids who really have the deck stacked against them - born into generational poverty, a parent with substance abuse, a parent incarcerated, violent homes/communities, homeless, food insecure. Just stop already.
Even if those kids don't get into Yale or Harvard, it is THOSE kids who have life stacked against them. Majority of kids on DCUM (ie parents posting on DCUM) are privileged and don't really know what it's like to experience a rough, challenging life and to have the deck of life stacked against them. the fact their parent is concerned about what college they attend shows they have the support to go far in life.
So what’s wrong for PP to claim the unfair disadvantage by ivies? Only one group of people can be disadvantaged?
The PP would be much happier in life if they were not so obsessed with "unfair advantage for the disadvantaged" Even if Harvard and Yale did not focus on increasing "disadvantaged attendance", your privileged kid still would only have a single digit chance of acceptance. Not like changing that will give everyone a 30-40% chance.
And no, a rich/UMC kid whose parents both attended college and are concerned with getting them into a T20 school is not really "disadvantaged" in life. Anymore so than their kid is disadvantaged that they have to drive a Honda instead of a Tesla.
Anonymous
11/07/2023 10:17
Subject: Visiting high reaches
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Visited Harvard. Disappointed and not impressed. It was immediately dropped from consideration. It's not a waste. Helps to narrow the list and realize things you may never have learned without an in-person visit.
Ha ha ha. I’m sure Harvard was devastated.
It really isn't for everyone. The campus is so-so. And then there are all the tourists. Harvard Square isn't what it used to be. And the school is clearly focused on its graduate programs. A visit is a good thing to do to make things clear. For a good undergrad experience, Harvard is not where it's at for a lot of smart kids. Visits are clarifying
Your opinion matters only after you’ve been accepted.
Not really. Not quite the same, but my cousin applied to the Naval Academy on a whim, knowing she really wanted to go somewhere else and assuming she wouldn't get in. Joke was on her! She was ultimately admitted, hated it, and transferred out. Applying just because of prestige is a bad idea.
Anonymous
11/07/2023 07:03
Subject: Visiting high reaches
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Visited Harvard. Disappointed and not impressed. It was immediately dropped from consideration. It's not a waste. Helps to narrow the list and realize things you may never have learned without an in-person visit.
Ha ha ha. I’m sure Harvard was devastated.
It really isn't for everyone. The campus is so-so. And then there are all the tourists. Harvard Square isn't what it used to be. And the school is clearly focused on its graduate programs. A visit is a good thing to do to make things clear. For a good undergrad experience, Harvard is not where it's at for a lot of smart kids. Visits are clarifying
Your opinion matters only after you’ve been accepted.
Anonymous
11/07/2023 06:37
Subject: Visiting high reaches
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Visited Harvard. Disappointed and not impressed. It was immediately dropped from consideration. It's not a waste. Helps to narrow the list and realize things you may never have learned without an in-person visit.
Ha ha ha. I’m sure Harvard was devastated.
It really isn't for everyone. The campus is so-so. And then there are all the tourists. Harvard Square isn't what it used to be. And the school is clearly focused on its graduate programs. A visit is a good thing to do to make things clear. For a good undergrad experience, Harvard is not where it's at for a lot of smart kids. Visits are clarifying
+1
My engineering kid visited Cornell and wanted to like it. But just couldn't. The campus is in the middle of nowhere (we are not east coast)---the drive from Boston with stops in NY at various schools showed us it truly was middle of nowhere. They were not giving tours, were not helpful with any questions, just had a "we don't care attitude---our acceptance rate is single digits and we don't need you to apply" Did not get anyone who was helpful on the tour, the students on campus (it was summer) did not seem "happy". So for my kid, it helped make decision to not apply.
We did 10 campuses in a week, and this was by far the "worst experience" short of "Troy NY sucks and no way in Hell am I living in this town for 4 years" (I agree Ithaca is a much better college town).
My kid had a completely opposite visit. Visited Cornell last fall on a school trip for students studying hospitality. Had tours with current students and meetings with admissions officers. Peak foliage. Met professors at lunch. My kid came back so excited.
Just applied ED for the hotel admin program. 🙏
Anonymous
11/07/2023 06:10
Subject: Visiting high reaches
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Visited Harvard. Disappointed and not impressed. It was immediately dropped from consideration. It's not a waste. Helps to narrow the list and realize things you may never have learned without an in-person visit.
Ha ha ha. I’m sure Harvard was devastated.
I felt that way about MIT. They surely didn’t care but it was good to cross it off as a place I didn’t want to reply. We didn’t make a special trip just for MIT and we’re visiting several schools in the area. I would only see the high reaches if you are there for other reasons.
Anonymous
11/07/2023 03:22
Subject: Visiting high reaches
Anonymous wrote:I can't help but think it's a waste of time and money. Thoughts?
If you have the time and money, sometimes it's just a fun trip to see different parts of the country and spend some quality time.
If you need to be more strategic, definitely try to visit if you're applying ED or any kind of restrictive early action. We eliminated a whole bunch of schools. Columbia? To hell with that misery. Chicago? I loved it. DC did not. Something about awkward, socially deficient students. Thought Northwestern would be a win. Nope. Left both of us cold. Notre Dame? Really nice students, but it's genuinely middle of nowhere and very Catholic under grey skies. Didn't feel part of the cult. WashU? Country club school. All that was missing were the golf carts.
We eventually found the school that seemed right for him. Applied ED. Got in. It's been a great experience. Feels like it's the right place. And in the meantime, we had a fun trip
Anonymous
11/06/2023 22:48
Subject: Visiting high reaches
Because if you can afford it, visiting can help your kid decide "yes I really like the school" vs "nope, don't want that T25 school despite what everyone says and now I don't have 4 extra supplementals to worry about"
I would recommend visiting schools in your area first. If you live in DC or close in NoVa, check out Georgetown, Maryland, ACU, GW etc... It gives the kid a start on what colleges are about in an urban environment. Go from there and try to decide what your kid is looking for. My kid (coming from a small class private school) wanted to attend a big state school with a bunch of school spirit.
The process was enlightening to me. My kid loved NC, but hated NC State (we left the tour 15 minutes into it). Georgetown was out because we live two blocks from campus. Wisconsin was awesome, but too cold in the winter. Same with Michigan. Texas was too far from home. SMU was great but not for my kid
it was good to let my kid go to these campuses and get the vibe. I also agree with a PP. Tour schools that your kid is likely to be accepted and go from there. Good luck!
Anonymous
11/06/2023 22:40
Subject: Visiting high reaches
Anonymous wrote:My '21 got in to quite a few "high reaches" and we made 4 trips in March/April, 3 to admitted student days and 1 independent. Well worth it at that point, but we considered trips to be a waste of money until she was in.
I see how you worked in that humble brag.
Stealth.
Anonymous
11/06/2023 22:38
Subject: Visiting high reaches
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Visited Harvard. Disappointed and not impressed. It was immediately dropped from consideration. It's not a waste. Helps to narrow the list and realize things you may never have learned without an in-person visit.
Ha ha ha. I’m sure Harvard was devastated.
It really isn't for everyone. The campus is so-so. And then there are all the tourists. Harvard Square isn't what it used to be. And the school is clearly focused on its graduate programs. A visit is a good thing to do to make things clear. For a good undergrad experience, Harvard is not where it's at for a lot of smart kids. Visits are clarifying
+1
My engineering kid visited Cornell and wanted to like it. But just couldn't. The campus is in the middle of nowhere (we are not east coast)---the drive from Boston with stops in NY at various schools showed us it truly was middle of nowhere. They were not giving tours, were not helpful with any questions, just had a "we don't care attitude---our acceptance rate is single digits and we don't need you to apply" Did not get anyone who was helpful on the tour, the students on campus (it was summer) did not seem "happy". So for my kid, it helped make decision to not apply.
We did 10 campuses in a week, and this was by far the "worst experience" short of "Troy NY sucks and no way in Hell am I living in this town for 4 years" (I agree Ithaca is a much better college town).
+1
I think Cornell is also so big, that it is like a city unto itself. They give zero personal attention, which was striking after being somewhat coddled at even mid-tier SLAC’s.
Anonymous
11/06/2023 22:35
Subject: Visiting high reaches
Well most of those kids aren’t likely to be accepted at an Ivy either, andI hope they don’t set their hearts on it. PP here just meant she had literally no hooks and therefore close to zero percent chance of getting into a top ivy. So I am glad she moved on. You should too.Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:We went to a few ivies because the DDs school admissions officer thought she should and DD decided that she didn’t like the vibe, or the size, and didn’t apply to any Ivies. Asian kid, 1 year pre Supreme Court decision, so the deck was stacked again and she really didn’t stand a chance. Better for her that she didn’t set her heart on it. So visiting some Ivies WAS helpful, in a backwards way.
Your child doesn’t have the deck stacked against her. Going to Binghamton instead of Yale isn’t a hardship. There are kids who really have the deck stacked against them - born into generational poverty, a parent with substance abuse, a parent incarcerated, violent homes/communities, homeless, food insecure. Just stop already.