Anonymous
Post 05/09/2024 09:50     Subject: Schools where balance is possible

Anonymous wrote:All of them depending on major


-1. Disagree. It depends on your DC and their abilities, OP.
Anonymous
Post 05/09/2024 09:49     Subject: Re:Schools where balance is possible

What is the consensus answer to this question?
Anonymous
Post 10/24/2023 11:55     Subject: Schools where balance is possible

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Any big state university. Michigan, UCLA, UNC etc. Yes a portion of the kids are high achievers but there is a portion who are not, too (or who weren’t as well prepared, etc). Vs any college like Wash U, Georgetown, etc will be virtually all high achievers.

I taught at UCLA and it was a super competitive environment. It was very hard to get into classes because everything was oversubscribed. And once you were in a class it was all about grades since the classes were huge and there was so few chances to interact with faculty. On top of that, because it's in LA, lots of kids go home for weekends or work off campus, so there was a weak social life outside of Greek life. The school felt like a big, unfriendly cattle call on a pretty campus with great weather. I would never send my kid there.


There you go. From the horses's mouth. The PP saying UCLA was full of slackers a) never attended b) didn't have a kid who attended and c) based their assessment of 10's of thousands of students on 2 acquaintances.

That is the kind of nonsense that ruins threads on DCUM.


I’m the original poster who said it. Spouse and I are from LA and still have lots of family and friends there. My husband went to ucla, niece just graduated and nephew is a sophmore, and many close friends’ kids currently attend. So yes I have close ties and they have all said this. My niece and nephew found their high school more challenging than college their first couple of years, and never found it unmanageable. Niece was history/film studies major and nephew is something related to comp sci.

I hear the exact same thing about UVA. Yes there are high achievers, but plenty of laid back kids and the classes aren’t very challenging (I just heard this from a neighbor whose junior is a government major or whatever uva calls poli sci).

I stand by that there will always be a range of abilities at any state university - ucla to michigan to umd. So I think they are excellent colleges to consider for students who want a more balanced life.


Still all hearsay. You didn't attend. You have zero first hand knowledge.


as is the professor’s information, since nor did they attend - they relayed second hand info from their students and/or their perceptions of it.


Wrong, professors get a very good sense of stress levels. Obsession with grades. Sense of community. Vibe in campus. And they see it year in and year out.


good to know - only current student and professors need reply to this thread, since responding about one’s kid’s, kid’s friends, relative’s, spouse’s experiences etc are second hand and not valid sources of information

I like ucla and michigan quite a lot and hope my own kids apply, as I think these are colleges with strong reputations where you can find all the challenge you do or do not want balanced with whatever else brings you pleasure/exploration (which was my original point in recommending state unis to OP)
Anonymous
Post 10/24/2023 11:41     Subject: Schools where balance is possible

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Any big state university. Michigan, UCLA, UNC etc. Yes a portion of the kids are high achievers but there is a portion who are not, too (or who weren’t as well prepared, etc). Vs any college like Wash U, Georgetown, etc will be virtually all high achievers.

I taught at UCLA and it was a super competitive environment. It was very hard to get into classes because everything was oversubscribed. And once you were in a class it was all about grades since the classes were huge and there was so few chances to interact with faculty. On top of that, because it's in LA, lots of kids go home for weekends or work off campus, so there was a weak social life outside of Greek life. The school felt like a big, unfriendly cattle call on a pretty campus with great weather. I would never send my kid there.


There you go. From the horses's mouth. The PP saying UCLA was full of slackers a) never attended b) didn't have a kid who attended and c) based their assessment of 10's of thousands of students on 2 acquaintances.

That is the kind of nonsense that ruins threads on DCUM.


I’m the original poster who said it. Spouse and I are from LA and still have lots of family and friends there. My husband went to ucla, niece just graduated and nephew is a sophmore, and many close friends’ kids currently attend. So yes I have close ties and they have all said this. My niece and nephew found their high school more challenging than college their first couple of years, and never found it unmanageable. Niece was history/film studies major and nephew is something related to comp sci.

I hear the exact same thing about UVA. Yes there are high achievers, but plenty of laid back kids and the classes aren’t very challenging (I just heard this from a neighbor whose junior is a government major or whatever uva calls poli sci).

I stand by that there will always be a range of abilities at any state university - ucla to michigan to umd. So I think they are excellent colleges to consider for students who want a more balanced life.


Still all hearsay. You didn't attend. You have zero first hand knowledge.


NP. And, still relevant. This isn't a competition or a court of law! I appreciate pp's perspective.
Anonymous
Post 10/24/2023 10:34     Subject: Re:Schools where balance is possible

Anonymous wrote:Where is Boston College on the scale of balance?

My question
Anonymous
Post 10/24/2023 10:25     Subject: Schools where balance is possible

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Any big state university. Michigan, UCLA, UNC etc. Yes a portion of the kids are high achievers but there is a portion who are not, too (or who weren’t as well prepared, etc). Vs any college like Wash U, Georgetown, etc will be virtually all high achievers.

I taught at UCLA and it was a super competitive environment. It was very hard to get into classes because everything was oversubscribed. And once you were in a class it was all about grades since the classes were huge and there was so few chances to interact with faculty. On top of that, because it's in LA, lots of kids go home for weekends or work off campus, so there was a weak social life outside of Greek life. The school felt like a big, unfriendly cattle call on a pretty campus with great weather. I would never send my kid there.


There you go. From the horses's mouth. The PP saying UCLA was full of slackers a) never attended b) didn't have a kid who attended and c) based their assessment of 10's of thousands of students on 2 acquaintances.

That is the kind of nonsense that ruins threads on DCUM.


I’m the original poster who said it. Spouse and I are from LA and still have lots of family and friends there. My husband went to ucla, niece just graduated and nephew is a sophmore, and many close friends’ kids currently attend. So yes I have close ties and they have all said this. My niece and nephew found their high school more challenging than college their first couple of years, and never found it unmanageable. Niece was history/film studies major and nephew is something related to comp sci.

I hear the exact same thing about UVA. Yes there are high achievers, but plenty of laid back kids and the classes aren’t very challenging (I just heard this from a neighbor whose junior is a government major or whatever uva calls poli sci).

I stand by that there will always be a range of abilities at any state university - ucla to michigan to umd. So I think they are excellent colleges to consider for students who want a more balanced life.


Still all hearsay. You didn't attend. You have zero first hand knowledge.


as is the professor’s information, since nor did they attend - they relayed second hand info from their students and/or their perceptions of it.

Actually, I did attend and received a degree, just not for undergrad.

I went to a much smaller university for undergrad and am very grateful for the smaller classes and huge amount of interaction I had with faculty. I arrived at UCLA expecting to be impressed given the school's reputation and left being very, very glad I didn't go there for undergrad.
Anonymous
Post 10/24/2023 10:23     Subject: Schools where balance is possible

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Any big state university. Michigan, UCLA, UNC etc. Yes a portion of the kids are high achievers but there is a portion who are not, too (or who weren’t as well prepared, etc). Vs any college like Wash U, Georgetown, etc will be virtually all high achievers.

I taught at UCLA and it was a super competitive environment. It was very hard to get into classes because everything was oversubscribed. And once you were in a class it was all about grades since the classes were huge and there was so few chances to interact with faculty. On top of that, because it's in LA, lots of kids go home for weekends or work off campus, so there was a weak social life outside of Greek life. The school felt like a big, unfriendly cattle call on a pretty campus with great weather. I would never send my kid there.


There you go. From the horses's mouth. The PP saying UCLA was full of slackers a) never attended b) didn't have a kid who attended and c) based their assessment of 10's of thousands of students on 2 acquaintances.

That is the kind of nonsense that ruins threads on DCUM.


I’m the original poster who said it. Spouse and I are from LA and still have lots of family and friends there. My husband went to ucla, niece just graduated and nephew is a sophmore, and many close friends’ kids currently attend. So yes I have close ties and they have all said this. My niece and nephew found their high school more challenging than college their first couple of years, and never found it unmanageable. Niece was history/film studies major and nephew is something related to comp sci.

I hear the exact same thing about UVA. Yes there are high achievers, but plenty of laid back kids and the classes aren’t very challenging (I just heard this from a neighbor whose junior is a government major or whatever uva calls poli sci).

I stand by that there will always be a range of abilities at any state university - ucla to michigan to umd. So I think they are excellent colleges to consider for students who want a more balanced life.


Still all hearsay. You didn't attend. You have zero first hand knowledge.


as is the professor’s information, since nor did they attend - they relayed second hand info from their students and/or their perceptions of it.


Wrong, professors get a very good sense of stress levels. Obsession with grades. Sense of community. Vibe in campus. And they see it year in and year out.
Anonymous
Post 10/24/2023 10:20     Subject: Schools where balance is possible

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Any big state university. Michigan, UCLA, UNC etc. Yes a portion of the kids are high achievers but there is a portion who are not, too (or who weren’t as well prepared, etc). Vs any college like Wash U, Georgetown, etc will be virtually all high achievers.

I taught at UCLA and it was a super competitive environment. It was very hard to get into classes because everything was oversubscribed. And once you were in a class it was all about grades since the classes were huge and there was so few chances to interact with faculty. On top of that, because it's in LA, lots of kids go home for weekends or work off campus, so there was a weak social life outside of Greek life. The school felt like a big, unfriendly cattle call on a pretty campus with great weather. I would never send my kid there.


There you go. From the horses's mouth. The PP saying UCLA was full of slackers a) never attended b) didn't have a kid who attended and c) based their assessment of 10's of thousands of students on 2 acquaintances.

That is the kind of nonsense that ruins threads on DCUM.


I’m the original poster who said it. Spouse and I are from LA and still have lots of family and friends there. My husband went to ucla, niece just graduated and nephew is a sophmore, and many close friends’ kids currently attend. So yes I have close ties and they have all said this. My niece and nephew found their high school more challenging than college their first couple of years, and never found it unmanageable. Niece was history/film studies major and nephew is something related to comp sci.

I hear the exact same thing about UVA. Yes there are high achievers, but plenty of laid back kids and the classes aren’t very challenging (I just heard this from a neighbor whose junior is a government major or whatever uva calls poli sci).

I stand by that there will always be a range of abilities at any state university - ucla to michigan to umd. So I think they are excellent colleges to consider for students who want a more balanced life.

I don't think it's that unusual to find college to be less stressful than high school. You are usually taking fewer classes with less classroom time per class, there's less busy work, and have fewer ECs that are demanding your attention. You're also more likely to be living on or near campus and spending less time commuting.

In college you also can pick your major so you spend more time on stuff you like (and presumably are good at) and less time on subjects you dislike. There are also majors that are easier than others.

Really, I don't think any of your info is specific to state schools. There are a range of abilities at every school.
Anonymous
Post 10/24/2023 10:19     Subject: Schools where balance is possible

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Any big state university. Michigan, UCLA, UNC etc. Yes a portion of the kids are high achievers but there is a portion who are not, too (or who weren’t as well prepared, etc). Vs any college like Wash U, Georgetown, etc will be virtually all high achievers.

I taught at UCLA and it was a super competitive environment. It was very hard to get into classes because everything was oversubscribed. And once you were in a class it was all about grades since the classes were huge and there was so few chances to interact with faculty. On top of that, because it's in LA, lots of kids go home for weekends or work off campus, so there was a weak social life outside of Greek life. The school felt like a big, unfriendly cattle call on a pretty campus with great weather. I would never send my kid there.


Very helpful insider’s take—thank you!
Anonymous
Post 10/24/2023 10:16     Subject: Schools where balance is possible

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Any big state university. Michigan, UCLA, UNC etc. Yes a portion of the kids are high achievers but there is a portion who are not, too (or who weren’t as well prepared, etc). Vs any college like Wash U, Georgetown, etc will be virtually all high achievers.

I taught at UCLA and it was a super competitive environment. It was very hard to get into classes because everything was oversubscribed. And once you were in a class it was all about grades since the classes were huge and there was so few chances to interact with faculty. On top of that, because it's in LA, lots of kids go home for weekends or work off campus, so there was a weak social life outside of Greek life. The school felt like a big, unfriendly cattle call on a pretty campus with great weather. I would never send my kid there.


There you go. From the horses's mouth. The PP saying UCLA was full of slackers a) never attended b) didn't have a kid who attended and c) based their assessment of 10's of thousands of students on 2 acquaintances.

That is the kind of nonsense that ruins threads on DCUM.


I’m the original poster who said it. Spouse and I are from LA and still have lots of family and friends there. My husband went to ucla, niece just graduated and nephew is a sophmore, and many close friends’ kids currently attend. So yes I have close ties and they have all said this. My niece and nephew found their high school more challenging than college their first couple of years, and never found it unmanageable. Niece was history/film studies major and nephew is something related to comp sci.

I hear the exact same thing about UVA. Yes there are high achievers, but plenty of laid back kids and the classes aren’t very challenging (I just heard this from a neighbor whose junior is a government major or whatever uva calls poli sci).

I stand by that there will always be a range of abilities at any state university - ucla to michigan to umd. So I think they are excellent colleges to consider for students who want a more balanced life.


Still all hearsay. You didn't attend. You have zero first hand knowledge.


I doubt many college students are posting on dcum. they are the only people who could answer this question using first-hand, current knowledge.
Anonymous
Post 10/24/2023 10:14     Subject: Schools where balance is possible

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Any big state university. Michigan, UCLA, UNC etc. Yes a portion of the kids are high achievers but there is a portion who are not, too (or who weren’t as well prepared, etc). Vs any college like Wash U, Georgetown, etc will be virtually all high achievers.

I taught at UCLA and it was a super competitive environment. It was very hard to get into classes because everything was oversubscribed. And once you were in a class it was all about grades since the classes were huge and there was so few chances to interact with faculty. On top of that, because it's in LA, lots of kids go home for weekends or work off campus, so there was a weak social life outside of Greek life. The school felt like a big, unfriendly cattle call on a pretty campus with great weather. I would never send my kid there.


There you go. From the horses's mouth. The PP saying UCLA was full of slackers a) never attended b) didn't have a kid who attended and c) based their assessment of 10's of thousands of students on 2 acquaintances.

That is the kind of nonsense that ruins threads on DCUM.


I’m the original poster who said it. Spouse and I are from LA and still have lots of family and friends there. My husband went to ucla, niece just graduated and nephew is a sophmore, and many close friends’ kids currently attend. So yes I have close ties and they have all said this. My niece and nephew found their high school more challenging than college their first couple of years, and never found it unmanageable. Niece was history/film studies major and nephew is something related to comp sci.

I hear the exact same thing about UVA. Yes there are high achievers, but plenty of laid back kids and the classes aren’t very challenging (I just heard this from a neighbor whose junior is a government major or whatever uva calls poli sci).

I stand by that there will always be a range of abilities at any state university - ucla to michigan to umd. So I think they are excellent colleges to consider for students who want a more balanced life.


Still all hearsay. You didn't attend. You have zero first hand knowledge.


as is the professor’s information, since nor did they attend - they relayed second hand info from their students and/or their perceptions of it.
Anonymous
Post 10/24/2023 10:05     Subject: Schools where balance is possible

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Any big state university. Michigan, UCLA, UNC etc. Yes a portion of the kids are high achievers but there is a portion who are not, too (or who weren’t as well prepared, etc). Vs any college like Wash U, Georgetown, etc will be virtually all high achievers.

I taught at UCLA and it was a super competitive environment. It was very hard to get into classes because everything was oversubscribed. And once you were in a class it was all about grades since the classes were huge and there was so few chances to interact with faculty. On top of that, because it's in LA, lots of kids go home for weekends or work off campus, so there was a weak social life outside of Greek life. The school felt like a big, unfriendly cattle call on a pretty campus with great weather. I would never send my kid there.


There you go. From the horses's mouth. The PP saying UCLA was full of slackers a) never attended b) didn't have a kid who attended and c) based their assessment of 10's of thousands of students on 2 acquaintances.

That is the kind of nonsense that ruins threads on DCUM.


I’m the original poster who said it. Spouse and I are from LA and still have lots of family and friends there. My husband went to ucla, niece just graduated and nephew is a sophmore, and many close friends’ kids currently attend. So yes I have close ties and they have all said this. My niece and nephew found their high school more challenging than college their first couple of years, and never found it unmanageable. Niece was history/film studies major and nephew is something related to comp sci.

I hear the exact same thing about UVA. Yes there are high achievers, but plenty of laid back kids and the classes aren’t very challenging (I just heard this from a neighbor whose junior is a government major or whatever uva calls poli sci).

I stand by that there will always be a range of abilities at any state university - ucla to michigan to umd. So I think they are excellent colleges to consider for students who want a more balanced life.


Still all hearsay. You didn't attend. You have zero first hand knowledge.
Anonymous
Post 10/24/2023 09:59     Subject: Schools where balance is possible

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Lately, I've been hearing my kid talk about the pressure in their high school and not wanting a cutthroat environment in college. Is it school dependent or more major dependent? What kind of school would you look for a good balance or education and time for sports, hobbies and friends? If your kid is smart, but doesn't want to grind, grind, grind at the expense of everything else, what kid of school would you target?


College Express has lists derived from surveys of hundreds of college counselors. Here’s one on colleges with balanced lives:

https://www.collegexpress.com/lists/list/the-experts-choice-colleges-where-life-is-balanced/406/


I have kids at two of the schools on this list. Academic rigor was important to each of them, but so was balance, and they both feel that they get that at their schools. So for them, at least, this list tracks.


Can you say which ones? My daughter is a workaholic and not looking for balance but I would love her to find it by mistake 😂 so maybe I can nudge her toward a slightly more chill school.


I would love to know this too! Also their major since that makes a big difference.
Anonymous
Post 10/24/2023 09:40     Subject: Schools where balance is possible

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Lately, I've been hearing my kid talk about the pressure in their high school and not wanting a cutthroat environment in college. Is it school dependent or more major dependent? What kind of school would you look for a good balance or education and time for sports, hobbies and friends? If your kid is smart, but doesn't want to grind, grind, grind at the expense of everything else, what kid of school would you target?


College Express has lists derived from surveys of hundreds of college counselors. Here’s one on colleges with balanced lives:

https://www.collegexpress.com/lists/list/the-experts-choice-colleges-where-life-is-balanced/406/


I have kids at two of the schools on this list. Academic rigor was important to each of them, but so was balance, and they both feel that they get that at their schools. So for them, at least, this list tracks.


Can you say which ones? My daughter is a workaholic and not looking for balance but I would love her to find it by mistake 😂 so maybe I can nudge her toward a slightly more chill school.
Anonymous
Post 10/23/2023 23:22     Subject: Schools where balance is possible

All of them depending on major