I'd have one conversation with him informing him you will no longer be doing his laundry and then drop the rope on that entirely. DH and I both do laundry. I do mine, he does his. I do the kids stuff, he does the house linens. We both run random other loads of house towels/kitchen towels as needed.

Laundry is a big chore, it should be split.

And yet, men still rule the world.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Every adult should do their own laundry!

Women stop doing other people’s laundry, stop “making their lunch”, stop treating them like children!

Do you make your own diner separately too? Not helping each other out is not a marriage.

DP.

It's not a marriage either when one person keeps doing all or most of the " helping".

*dinner

Anonymous wrote:Every adult should do their own laundry!

Women stop doing other people’s laundry, stop “making their lunch”, stop treating them like children!

Do you make your own diner separately too? Not helping each other out is not a marriage.

I just wanted to say you are lucky, OP, that your husband even unpacked his suitcase. Mine will leave a suitcase full of clothes for MONTHS. He will say things like, "I can't find x article of clothing" when it is in the suitcase. He will buy new deodorant so he doesnt have to take the deodorant out of the suitcase.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH doesn’t do laundry or cook, or really anything, so I am divorcing him. Finances are an issue but there is always an answer to that if you want out bad enough.

Ladies - if finances are an issue that means your men are breadwinners. I would seriously consider doing the laundry for them because they earn more !

Not true. Sometimes it means the wife is the breadwinner and can’t afford to pay alimony and child support to a deadbeat dad.

OP said finances would be very difficult which likely means he brings more to the table AND she expects him to do household errands 50:50. She never responded who makes more. Yes, some women are breadwinners but statistically 70% chance her husband makes more money

Yeah, because he has a penis, not because he actually deserves it. Using institutionalized sexism as a cudgel against the very people who suffer from it is...quite a lewk.

The cause-effect is backwards. Many husbands have the higher paying job because the couple prioritized his job over hers. So he got more promotions while she mommy-tracked. You can say that's not fair, but it's the decision they made. Another thing is that women want husbands that earn more money than them. Read other threads about OPs looking for husbands and OPs divorcing their low income husbands for evidence.

Anonymous wrote:Laundry is literally the easiest household chore. It takes two seconds to throw a load in and walk away for an hour.

I cannot understand why this is the battle anyone would choose.

Which is why you should do your own and I will do mine.

Anonymous wrote:I mean, he clearly thinks it's fine to just do one's own laundry, even if doing someone else's at the exact same time would not require appreciable additional work or time. So why not just do yours? He's obviously fine with that division of labor. Better than seething about it and getting resentful.

This!

The only problem here is your reaction.

I do the kids' laundry, the sheets and towels, and my own clothes. When we first started dating, my husband used a laundry service for his clothes. Then when we started living together and before we had kids, I did his laundry along with mine. It felt like a nice thing to do for him. But I only have time for so much sorting and folding. So back to being responsible for his own clothes! Honestly, if he decided to use a laundry service again, I would probably add on our sheets and towels.

Every adult should do their own laundry!

Women stop doing other people’s laundry, stop “making their lunch”, stop treating them like children!

He’ll do his laundry when he wants to, is what will happen. The worst repercussions will be that the hamper will overflow and there may be baskets of clean clothes everywhere. So if this is going to bother you, figure out a place to put the hamper and baskets. My DH will also pull cr*p sometimes like put my clean clothes from the dryer on the floor because he had used all the baskets and is in a panic about doing his laundry (because he hasn’t done it for a month and has nothing clean). That’s when we enter into WWIII.

The other annoying thing DH will do is announce in an urgent voice on a Saturday “I have to do a lot of laundry today!!” implying that I shouldn’t do my own laundry or DC’s or the linens. I just ignore him and feel annoyed. Like I’m just not going to do laundry all weekend because he feels like he may, at some point, want to do a load? I think he actually thinks that he should have the washer and dryer reserved for his exclusive use, just in case.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH doesn’t do laundry or cook, or really anything, so I am divorcing him. Finances are an issue but there is always an answer to that if you want out bad enough.

Ladies - if finances are an issue that means your men are breadwinners. I would seriously consider doing the laundry for them because they earn more !

Not true. Sometimes it means the wife is the breadwinner and can’t afford to pay alimony and child support to a deadbeat dad.

OP said finances would be very difficult which likely means he brings more to the table AND she expects him to do household errands 50:50. She never responded who makes more. Yes, some women are breadwinners but statistically 70% chance her husband makes more money

Yeah, because he has a penis, not because he actually deserves it. Using institutionalized sexism as a cudgel against the very people who suffer from it is...quite a lewk.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH doesn’t do laundry or cook, or really anything, so I am divorcing him. Finances are an issue but there is always an answer to that if you want out bad enough.

Ladies - if finances are an issue that means your men are breadwinners. I would seriously consider doing the laundry for them because they earn more !

Ooh ooh do me next. I want some of that magical money that men get just because someone on DCUM declares it.

Ha!

If it were me, I may avoid washing your clothes because I'm afraid of ruining them. My clothes go in the wash, any temperature any detergent, then in the dryer until dry. Your clothes need to be presorted in a way only you know how to decide, washed in separate temperature loads with specific detergents, some hung out some in the dryer. And your clothes are expensive and hard to replace. I can order similar new shirts or pants to replace mine. You will need to spend hours trying on clothes to find replacements. Between getting in trouble for not doing laundry and getting in trouble for doing it wrong (you weren't home to answer questions about delicates, right?). I know which one I choose.