"Very attractive" women get too much attention from the wrong men, unless you have a bouncer to run a credit/background check first. "Decent looking" women get attention from a better crowd.
A very attractive woman can look decent by dressing down and wearing less makeup.

Being "very attractive" works when you are targeting a specific individual and will take initiative.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wondering how dating life compares for those who are very attractive vs those of us who are average. Have you found it harder or easier to find a long term partner? Any disadvantages to being very attractive?

Advantage is that it is easy to find a man because men come up to me all the time. The downside is that men come up to me all time.

Where do they come up to you? DC women aren't the best dressers. Most of them lack makeup or good fashion sense and look like moms.

I'm "girl next door" attractive vice "very attractive" and men approach me quite often in the DC area. That's not unusual, so I'm sure really attractive women get it all of the time.

I'm surprised they do since many hold clearances and would be afraid of branded a perv in this post me too generation. I thought attractive women fished for men online.

Anonymous wrote:This is one area where it’s a big advantage. I think it’s a disadvantage at work and in some social situations. The advantage is specifically in getting men interested in going on multiple dates with you. After that, you have to know how to pick well and you also have to be a happy and sane person. And then you have to be compatible. But in terms of choice at the top of the funnel, it is an advantage (even at age 45). Very very unfair, I admit.

I agree.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wondering how dating life compares for those who are very attractive vs those of us who are average. Have you found it harder or easier to find a long term partner? Any disadvantages to being very attractive?

Advantage is that it is easy to find a man because men come up to me all the time. The downside is that men come up to me all time.

Where do they come up to you? DC women aren't the best dressers. Most of them lack makeup or good fashion sense and look like moms.

I'm "girl next door" attractive vice "very attractive" and men approach me quite often in the DC area. That's not unusual, so I'm sure really attractive women get it all of the time.

Anonymous wrote:My younger sister is drop dead gorgeous and while in college and for a few years after all she was attracting were good looking frat boy types whose priorities were getting drunk and getting laid. That is definitely not my sisters type! It wasn’t until she was 25 or so before she was in an environment of young professionals who had developed very different priorities. She is now happily married but if ask her about her dating history she’d say it was nothing to brag about as she didn’t date much. FWIW before she went to college my father warned her about the frat boy types and she took it to heart.

The bolded is worth a lot.

With proper guidance, gorgeous women will have great options. However if they are not guided, they tend to pick the same kind of loser over and over again.

My younger sister is drop dead gorgeous and while in college and for a few years after all she was attracting were good looking frat boy types whose priorities were getting drunk and getting laid. That is definitely not my sisters type! It wasn’t until she was 25 or so before she was in an environment of young professionals who had developed very different priorities. She is now happily married but if ask her about her dating history she’d say it was nothing to brag about as she didn’t date much. FWIW before she went to college my father warned her about the frat boy types and she took it to heart.

I'd say when I was younger I was a solid 8, maybe a DC 9. 5'6", 125 lbs, good skin, straight dark hair, nice teeth, etc.
It gave me options. I'm naturally a little on the shy side, so it helped that I wouldn't have to do any of the asking out--men were constantly asking me. Also, because I'm a nerd at heart, I've always been able to attend very competitive schools and the men I dated at those schools were extremely accomplished. Some were jerks, though.
DD is gorgeous; objectively much better looking than me when I was her age. What I notice about her is that people are constantly buying her or giving her things, even strangers.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:On a scale of 1-10 I think I’m a 6 or a 7 on a good day. So, attractive but far from gorgeous. But, I’m very outgoing, very curious about people and I believe I’m a good listener. My dating life was always very good (now married) because of those aspects and not really because of my looks. My husband is a solid 9 and when I met him his girlfriend was a 10 but he broke up with her because other than her beauty she didn’t have much to offer.

I think it’s funny that your post demonstrates precisely the type of stereotyping that beautiful women have to deal with- that they don’t have much to offer other than their beauty. All people have much more to offer than their appearance, most people are fascinating once you get to know them.

The kinder and more realistic way to look at things would have been to assume that she and your husband simply didn’t make a good match, but because she was beautiful, you include this little dig that she “didn’t have much to offer,” probably out of some petty jealousy or insecurity.

My DH said she didn’t have much to offer. I only met her once at a party and just said hello. She seemed nice and she was certainly pretty.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I always wonder about women who respond to threads like this. Do you really think you are "Very" attractive? LOL.

I don’t think they think they are Helen of Troy, but I think women know roughly what decile they fall in, or at the least which quartile!

Literally every woman I know thinks she's in the top quartile.

No...I am like a 6. Slightly better than average at my age (46) compared to women my age because I still take care of myself but that's where it ends

Anonymous wrote:Terrible, many choices but all still somehow awful. Once I switched to women, the dating world was in my hands. Will never go back.

Same!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:On a scale of 1-10 I think I’m a 6 or a 7 on a good day. So, attractive but far from gorgeous. But, I’m very outgoing, very curious about people and I believe I’m a good listener. My dating life was always very good (now married) because of those aspects and not really because of my looks. My husband is a solid 9 and when I met him his girlfriend was a 10 but he broke up with her because other than her beauty she didn’t have much to offer.

I think it’s funny that your post demonstrates precisely the type of stereotyping that beautiful women have to deal with- that they don’t have much to offer other than their beauty. All people have much more to offer than their appearance, most people are fascinating once you get to know them.

The kinder and more realistic way to look at things would have been to assume that she and your husband simply didn’t make a good match, but because she was beautiful, you include this little dig that she “didn’t have much to offer,” probably out of some petty jealousy or insecurity.

DP.

It's unfortunate but it's reality. People are lazy, and strikingly beautiful people are frequently put into a box based on their looks. Their looks stand out, people label them " that beautiful woman" and are not willing or able to dig deeper. This makes navigating relationships more challenging for them than one otherwise assume.

Anonymous wrote:On a scale of 1-10 I think I’m a 6 or a 7 on a good day. So, attractive but far from gorgeous. But, I’m very outgoing, very curious about people and I believe I’m a good listener. My dating life was always very good (now married) because of those aspects and not really because of my looks. My husband is a solid 9 and when I met him his girlfriend was a 10 but he broke up with her because other than her beauty she didn’t have much to offer.

I think it’s funny that your post demonstrates precisely the type of stereotyping that beautiful women have to deal with- that they don’t have much to offer other than their beauty. All people have much more to offer than their appearance, most people are fascinating once you get to know them.

The kinder and more realistic way to look at things would have been to assume that she and your husband simply didn’t make a good match, but because she was beautiful, you include this little dig that she “didn’t have much to offer,” probably out of some petty jealousy or insecurity.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:On a scale of 1-10 I think I’m a 6 or a 7 on a good day. So, attractive but far from gorgeous. But, I’m very outgoing, very curious about people and I believe I’m a good listener. My dating life was always very good (now married) because of those aspects and not really because of my looks. My husband is a solid 9 and when I met him his girlfriend was a 10 but he broke up with her because other than her beauty she didn’t have much to offer.

She just dumped him and he settled with you

NP. Well her loss then.

Unfortunately for you, crapping on people on DCUM will never improve your dating potential.

You came across as shitting your husband’s ex GF, and full of yourself for marrying a 9 man. As if you knew much about his ex GF or their relationship…..

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:On a scale of 1-10 I think I’m a 6 or a 7 on a good day. So, attractive but far from gorgeous. But, I’m very outgoing, very curious about people and I believe I’m a good listener. My dating life was always very good (now married) because of those aspects and not really because of my looks. My husband is a solid 9 and when I met him his girlfriend was a 10 but he broke up with her because other than her beauty she didn’t have much to offer.

She just dumped him and he settled with you

NP. Well her loss then.

Unfortunately for you, crapping on people on DCUM will never improve your dating potential.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:On a scale of 1-10 I think I’m a 6 or a 7 on a good day. So, attractive but far from gorgeous. But, I’m very outgoing, very curious about people and I believe I’m a good listener. My dating life was always very good (now married) because of those aspects and not really because of my looks. My husband is a solid 9 and when I met him his girlfriend was a 10 but he broke up with her because other than her beauty she didn’t have much to offer.

She just dumped him and he settled with you

Hmmm…..very snarky! Sounds like you have real world experience with settling. Divorced?