For me not waiting until the last minute is key. I overpack if I do it last minute or rush. I also have 1 small suitcase that I use - so it has to fit. I review where I'm going, what I'm going to do and the weather at the location. I allow myself no more than 3 pairs of shoes - the largest/heaviest gets worn on the plane, the others are filled with socks/underwear to use the space wisely. Next I try on the outfits I'm considering taking and see how they fit, how I feel in them and what they will pair with. I also have discovered that whenever I tell myself I "might" need this I don't. After I have outfits that work together, a color theme and an idea of what I will be doing. I do a trial pack. My suitcase is expandable - but my rule of thumb is I can't expand the bag heading out for a vacation. Being able to do laundry can help with overpacking as well - pack for a 1 week - 10 days with the knowledge you will be doing laundry - so my clothes have to be clothes I can wash easily. While I am traveling I make mental tallies of what I used, what I didn't, and what I wish I have brought. The more I do it the better I get at it. When I return from a trip - as I unpack my bag I make notes on my excel packing list- what I liked, what I didn't, what shoes were comfortable. Next trip I review my list and notes - this has helped me tremendously - especially when it comes to footwear or jackets.

I pack less for 1 month than my DH packs for 1 week. We manage our own bags and he experiences the error of this ways.

OP…

Thank you all for the new suggestions and sympathy for my DH’s death. He was the best and I miss him so much.

The PP that mentioned anxiety, is probably correct.

One thing that would help me, I think, is to purge my clothes and develop a capsule wardrobe…..although I’m not really sure how to do that. I just have too much stuff.

I really need to quit traveling with so many items that are easily replaceable.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP again….I also took 3 dresses. I’m hopeless.

Why are you bringing jeans- especially 2 pairs - on a summer vacation?

I have issues.

I'm a different PP who just packed 2 pairs of jeans into my summer vacation bag. It's because I'm going to a mountainous northern area where the temps will range from 50s-70s! I'm so excited to not be hot!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP again….I also took 3 dresses. I’m hopeless.

Why are you bringing jeans- especially 2 pairs - on a summer vacation?

I have issues.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We once packed for 6 weeks in carry ons. This was for a trip to Paris and the Alps in the summer, and what took up the most space was the hiking boots. We carried our fleece and rainjackets with us on the flight. We knew we had laundry facilities available, and just packed minimally. No electronics for the kids either - they watched movies on the plane, and had books at their destinations. Just capsule wardrobes, shared toiletries and important medications (Epipen and Synthroid: you can't get Synthroid in France). We had an Embassy event to go to and had one nice outfit for that, that we rewore for nights out.

My parents are like you. They cannot travel without several suitcases for every short trip. I have no idea what they put in there.

Thank you for a help-free, whimsical answer that served no useful purpose, but one which you wanted to get out there. This is completely unhelpful to the OP (and anyone, like me, who similarly overpacks and would be interested in reality-based answers). But really good to know you hike in the Alps with your severely allergic children, have important embassy functions for which you can wear a dress you can squeeze into your suitcase and which - importantly - pulls double-duty (Yay for you!) for that one night out on the town with hubby during your otherwise rustic, high-altitude “vacances.” And also very good to know about your doltish parents who overpack with God-knows-what they need and apparently don’t use. You charmed me with your sincerity.

Haha, very funny, PP! 😄

Anonymous wrote:This thread is interesting. I am not a carry on for two weeks person—but I am someone who thinks a lot about travel outfits and wears pretty much everything I bring. I guess a difference is that sensibly or not I tend to approach big trips as a moment to buy new clothes for the occasion and then I bring and wear them all. It seems sort of depressing to me to wear the same outfit over and over and sink laundry is not appealing. What is the downside that you all see of bringing a larger bag? Just the concern re lost luggage?

A big reason I want a smaller bag is because I carry it myself.
A lot of my travel involves trains, subways, buses, and other public transportation. I sometimes visit places where the cars can't go and I have to walk with my bag down a dirt/rocky road or up several fights of a narrow staircase, and a huge wheeled bag would be difficult. It's so much easier to have a carryon sized backpack for this kind of travel.

For example, a few years ago my son (age 17 at the time) and I landed in Edinburgh and then immediately (still exhausted from our red eye flight) took a train to Inverness. Even though we had bought our tickets with assigned seats well before our trip, the train was packed (we actually had to ask people to get out of our assigned seats) with no room in the luggage racks. We spent 4 hours with our bags on our laps, squished between the people sitting next to us and the many people standing in the aisle. I have no idea what we would have done with our bags if they had been full sized wheeled suitcases.

Anonymous wrote:This thread is interesting. I am not a carry on for two weeks person—but I am someone who thinks a lot about travel outfits and wears pretty much everything I bring. I guess a difference is that sensibly or not I tend to approach big trips as a moment to buy new clothes for the occasion and then I bring and wear them all. It seems sort of depressing to me to wear the same outfit over and over and sink laundry is not appealing. What is the downside that you all see of bringing a larger bag? Just the concern re lost luggage?

I almost always check a bag, so not coming from a carry-on mentality. I like to be comfortable and look good (not fashion plate, but not sloppy). However, it is so much easier and more enjoyable to really only bring what you need. Ideal for me is to not bring any clothing that goes unworn and have some-to-most reworn. Some sink wash is OK with me - a few lighter, thinner pieces that easily dry overnight. Some laundry service is Ok with me if needed. Laundromat is a huge time suck so while I have done it, I prefer to avoid it.

I spend a lot of time and put a lot if thought into what clothes I pack though and basically pack a capsule wardrobe specific to each trip (weather, culture, activities, etc.). It makes my trip better - easier to pack and unpack, to keep my space and bag tidy, to know I have what I need and streamline any decisions of what to wear each day.

I pack light for work when I go overseas--save older sneakers or other shoes and throw out when you're packing to come home. Bring disposable toiletries too.

I feel some of you have irrational shame about being seen wearing the same clothes or swimsuits. No, they don't need to be reversible, for goodness' sakes! You don't need a different outfit every single day!

No one cares. We assume your stuff is cleaned in between wearings. We're not even looking at you that closely!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here….

Thanks so much for the replies. I definitely get stressed packing and it takes forever. I’m getting ready to go to a resort for 3 weeks and I really need to rein it in.

My biggest problems:
I take too many undergarments. Different style bras and lots of underwear. I went to the beach earlier this summer and took a ridiculous amount of clothing. I took 2 pair of jeans, 5 pairs of shorts, 8 tops, 5 swimsuits, 3 coverups, and 4 pairs of pajamas. I also took two pair of shoes, 4 pairs of socks, 2 light sweaters and a sweatshirt. My biggest problem, is the little stuff. My tablet, charging cords, extra reading glasses, 3 pairs of sunglasses and anything you can pick up at a pharmacy….just in case. I really need help.I even pack different types of underwear. My husband died 2 years ago, so it’s just my clothes. I was an over packer when he was living too. I so want to learn to be efficient. Again, thank you all and I look forward to more suggestions.

Sorry for your loss OP.

I'm the 3 item poster.

For a resort where you don't need to move your luggage from place to place, and you might be dining with same people every evening, I would add in carry-on

3 swim bottoms, 1 is reversible from stripes to solid, 1 is a pair of swim shorts for SUP or kayak, could also jog in then

3 swim tops that can mix and match with bottoms. Two are reversible, floral to solid, black to navy

5-6 dresses for dinner that are lightweight
2-3 sundresses that could also be coverups eg Sweaty Betty Ace Explorer midi or mini dress

Sarong/wrap/cardigan

The reason 3 works for me is in case something doesn't dry overnight, then there's something to wear, and you could go a few days without washing if you wanted.

Enjoy your trip!

Not OP, but a similar overpacker. This is super helpful. I’m going to format it and print it out for myself.

OP, I’m so sorry about the loss of your husband. I hope you have a great trip.

Anonymous wrote:This thread is interesting. I am not a carry on for two weeks person—but I am someone who thinks a lot about travel outfits and wears pretty much everything I bring. I guess a difference is that sensibly or not I tend to approach big trips as a moment to buy new clothes for the occasion and then I bring and wear them all. It seems sort of depressing to me to wear the same outfit over and over and sink laundry is not appealing. What is the downside that you all see of bringing a larger bag? Just the concern re lost luggage?

Two reasons:

1. I hate being loaded with bags. I want to travel light, and not have to worry about keeping track of my stuff.

2. I don't have a lot of stuff to begin with at home. But I do like pretty things - it's just that I choose them carefully and plan to wear them for years. I don't follow trends, I buy to suit my figure. So I fill my carry-on with my pretty things, and don't have to "force" myself to re-wear, since that's what I usually do at home anyway. On vacation, I re-wear more often, which is fine, because I like my clothes. Sink laundry is rare - usually there are laundry facilities available.

If you're a more consumerist type who buys a lot and cycles through trends, then obviously you'll see things differently, and that's perfectly fine.

This thread is interesting. I am not a carry on for two weeks person—but I am someone who thinks a lot about travel outfits and wears pretty much everything I bring. I guess a difference is that sensibly or not I tend to approach big trips as a moment to buy new clothes for the occasion and then I bring and wear them all. It seems sort of depressing to me to wear the same outfit over and over and sink laundry is not appealing. What is the downside that you all see of bringing a larger bag? Just the concern re lost luggage?

It sounds like anxiety. You need the security of your stuff everywhere you go.

If you start with that realization, perhaps you'll pack with more self-awareness that whatever you bring won't shield you from harm. YOU will protect yourself from harm. If there are affordable laundry facilities where you're going, then you can bring a capsule wardrobe and wash your clothes as needed. I like to change my shirts just like a PP said, because I don't want to stink in the second half of the day, but I'm still a minimalist packer because I wash my clothes frequently on vacation. When it comes to underwear: I remember my parents bringing a short clothe-line, small piece of soap and just washing underwear in the sink of the hotel room, then hanging it to dry. It's the easiest thing to wash, even if you don't have a laundry!

But what I wonder about when I read your update is: why duplicates? I don't even own so much stuff in my house, let alone bring it on vacation with me. Why do you need 5 swimsuits? Most people bring 1-2, then rinse and hang to dry overnight. Swimsuits don't need to washed with detergent every time you use them. Why extra pairs of glasses? Why bring many pharmacy items when surely there's one where you're going? I pack a little first aid kit with tylenol, alcohol wipes, bandaids and such.

I think, for you, what would work best is that you designate a bag or suitcase and you decide that you're going to bring whatever you want, but that if it doesn't fit, it's not traveling. It will force you to sort out in your brain which item really needs to come on your trip. It will be both an intellectual/organizational challenge as well as a therapy exercise for your anxiety.

Anonymous wrote:You have to be okay with rewearing and have clothes that all matches each other

So like here would be my packing list for 1-3 week long trip this summer

One rayon tank dress
One pair of flowy linen pants
One pair of shorts
One sleeveless tee
Two t shirts
One button up sleeveless shirt
One hoodie
One casual jacket
Two pairs of shoes
Underwear—one pair per night times 1.5
One bra

With the caveat that all the tops can all be worn with the bottoms. Like I’ll wear the tops over the dress so the dress is like a skirt and also the dress by itself. The hoodie and jacket has to go with all tops and all bottoms. Etc

Exactly this. Coordinate base layers and rewear things, especially pants and jackets/sweaters (t-shirts and blouses will vary up your outfits and take up less space, and are more likely to get sweaty or stained).

I've actually gotten worse at packing light since having kids because my clothes are more likely to get messy and I need more backups. But I used to be great at it, and can still do it for business!