Anonymous
Post 07/28/2023 10:06     Subject: If you are not going to have food for the parents…
Anonymous wrote:Where’s the category for “I have plenty of food and have never run short for kids or adults but I just don’t see this as a huge deal”


This is where I am. I always have extra pizza and cake for adults but 98% of them won't touch it, so I can't really fault other people for deciding to skip it.
Anonymous
Post 07/28/2023 10:03     Subject: If you are not going to have food for the parents…
A lot of piggie 5 years old here who aren't satisfied with pizza and cake.
Anonymous
Post 07/28/2023 09:45     Subject: If you are not going to have food for the parents…
Where’s the category for “I have plenty of food and have never run short for kids or adults but I just don’t see this as a huge deal”
Anonymous
Post 07/28/2023 09:33     Subject: Re:If you are not going to have food for the parents…
Unless the theme is eating, then a kid’s party is presumably about something other than food. As long as the kids have fun then it’s a successful party - everyone can manage two hours without eating, and while it’s certainly nice for a host to provide a full meal it shouldn’t be expected at a kid’s party.
Anonymous
Post 07/28/2023 09:21     Subject: Re:If you are not going to have food for the parents…
Guys, it’s a 1.5 hour party for little kids. When I hosted my sons party last year at our home, I had more than enough pizza and cake for kids and adults and basically no adults ate anyway.

I agree that if it’s at your home there should be enough pizza and snacks for the adults. I don’t think it needs to be a huge elaborate spread that constitutes “good hosting.” It’s a toddler’s birthday party, not a 40th.

At a kids venue i fully expect the food to be only for the kids and I don’t think twice about it. Also, like adults can forgo a slice of pizza and cake at 11am. I think we’re being a bit harsh here.


Anonymous
Post 07/27/2023 23:45     Subject: If you are not going to have food for the parents…
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:People around here are mystifyingly cheap and bad hosts. I never experienced anything like it until I moved here. Where I come from and the circles I was in, running out of food for your guests no matter their age would be considered mortifying. Even coming close to running out so that your guests have noticed and are taking less food to be polite is considered bad hosting! Not serving food to all guests at whatever time of day just isn’t an option.

No one has ever been able to explain to me why this area in particular is like this.


Oh, I thought it as just the American custom? Glad to know that it is just my misfortune to meet horrible people in this neck of the woods.

I am an immigrant and I come from a culture here hospitality is taken seriously. e are taught to be inclusive and food is always abundant. I am horrified how uncivilized and uncouth people are here. They do not have even basic manners or etiquettes of hosting. The funny part is that everyone boasts about how rich they are but in reality they are poor and miserly people. Utterly disgusting.


And yet here you are. You are welcome to depart at your leisure.
Anonymous
Post 07/27/2023 13:49     Subject: Re:If you are not going to have food for the parents…
Have never had this happen and we go to dozens of parties each year. It’s interesting that some folks have experienced this multiple times and some not at all. I would love to know the why.
Anonymous
Post 07/27/2023 13:17     Subject: If you are not going to have food for the parents…
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Oh who cares! So what if a kid can't have a second piece of pizza. Kids barely go two hours without eating these days. They'll live.


So the people whose kids didn't get to eat, can just take their birthday presents home with them. With 25 kids, 12-15 gifts should be plenty for them, right? They'll live.

What a stupid idea. The point is that if you are going to bother to host a party, stop being cheap and order food for everyone. If this is outside your budget, don't host a venue party. Either host a party at home, at a park or don't host a party. But having a party where you cheap out and are a bad host is worse than not having a party.


If you want, sure, have your kid take their present home? Most people aren’t hosting children’s parties for the $20 gifts.

You are really worked up over a second slice of pizza. I suggest you bring a heavy snack with you if this is such a pernicious issue in your life. You can also text the hostess and ask whether the parents are eating too. Take some control of your own outcomes OP.


I’m the OP-and not the person who you are replying to here. I know it seems wild to you-but you are in the minority here. Also, you made almost the exact same comment further up. You really invested yourself in this for someone who doesn’t care what other people do. And also, it sounds like you have some personal food issues.


I am the PP they were replying to. Not only are in the minority, but they are socially dysfunctional. It is not required to have a party, but if you are going to host a party, you should at least be hospitable. Having insufficient food for the party attendees, is just plain rude and inhospitable. If you aren't going to serve enough food, then don't host. Find a cheaper option that you can afford to provide adequate hospitality for your guests.
Anonymous
Post 07/27/2023 13:12     Subject: If you are not going to have food for the parents…
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It depends on the time of day. 12:00 party? Yes, you need enough food for an actual lunch for everyone, including parents. 3:00 party? Half slice of pizza is plenty to wind the kids down from their activity and transition to cake.


Wrong. If the party is at a weird time then you can serve other stuff (fruit, snacks…whatever) but you need to have plenty of it. You don’t get to just have “less” pizza. But actually, you should always have a meal choice no matter what time of day the party is. But whatever you serve you need to have enough of it-ideally for everyone(including the parents that are required to be there with the kids).


Disagree. Most parents don’t even want the food. And serving a meal at 3 pm is silly.


+1 If the party is at 2 or 3 we already had lunch and birthday cake will be a sufficient snack. Just don't run out of cake!
1SWMom
Post 07/27/2023 12:59     Subject: If you are not going to have food for the parents…
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I don’t want to eat pizza at 3pm and I don’t know any other parents who do either.

I love it when hosts have beautiful cupcakes for the parents and coffee, or an “adult cooler” at pool parties but please don’t spend extra money to serve me a slice of tepid pizza at a trampoline park at 3pm.


Op here. This was an 1130 party. Just fyi for all the posters who keep mentioning a 3pm party. I agree you don’t need to serve a meal an a non meal time but you need to have stuff and it needs to be for the adults too. But regardless, the main issue with this particular party was that there was not enough food for the kids.

I disagree, a party at any time of day should have food.
My daughter’s next party is at 1:30pm, we are serving a full Brunch menu.
People shouldn’t have to eat before or after attending your event especially after they had to get their kids ready.
1SWMom
Post 07/27/2023 12:57     Subject: If you are not going to have food for the parents…
I do full open bar and adult catering and kid food at our parties, who the heck wants to be at a kid’s party anyway, I believe I should at least do it correctly and make it tolerable if not fun for the parents.
This a great example of do things correct or not at all IMO.

Anonymous
Post 07/26/2023 01:49     Subject: If you are not going to have food for the parents…
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It’s practically $1K floor to throw a 5 year old a party in this area with adequate space, food and drinks. It’s ridiculous. I don’t judge. And if the food runs out I would just tell my kid we will get something on the way home. It’s not a crisis.


I mean, you would think if you are investing that much you wouldn’t want your guests to leave hungry.


No - as someone who was raised in tight circumstances I feel uncomfortable spending an amount on a child’s bday party that would have been my parents’ food budget for several months growing up. It feels very extravagant. My point is more so that a kids party should not have to feel like an investment at all. And I do not begrudge anyone who is not trying to spend that kind of $$.


To be fair, in this case you don't invite 25 kids, maybe just a few.
Anonymous
Post 07/25/2023 22:29     Subject: If you are not going to have food for the parents…
Anonymous wrote:Re birthday parties for kids that are under 5:
Could you at least make sure to have enough for the kids?

In the last month I have attended two different parties that didn’t have enough food for the amount of kids they invited.

I get it-kid parties are expensive. But come on.

Personally I believe you should also have food for the adults when it’s not a drop off party but I know that’s a debate that’s been discussed numerous times. But at least have enough food for the kids!

Most recently I attended one that had 25 Kids in attendance and 3 pizzas. About 90% of the kids asked for seconds. And there wasn’t even enough for the first round as they had to cut a piece in half to have enough. Ridiculous.


Maybe people showed up with siblings or did not RSVP but just showed up.
Anonymous
Post 07/25/2023 16:59     Subject: If you are not going to have food for the parents…
Thinking of so many examples... My wealthy friends who threw a weekend long birthday party and flew in a chef who cooked for 60 people all weekend long. A working class neighbor who threw a block party and had a bbq with hot dogs and burgers so everyone could have multiple servings. It's only UMC people who, honestly, often suck at hosting.
Anonymous
Post 07/25/2023 16:56     Subject: If you are not going to have food for the parents…
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:People around here are mystifyingly cheap and bad hosts. I never experienced anything like it until I moved here. Where I come from and the circles I was in, running out of food for your guests no matter their age would be considered mortifying. Even coming close to running out so that your guests have noticed and are taking less food to be polite is considered bad hosting! Not serving food to all guests at whatever time of day just isn’t an option.

No one has ever been able to explain to me why this area in particular is like this.


Everyone feels house poor? When I logged in NOVA, my fixer upper townhome cost 2x what my parents’ much nicer single-family home costs. People stretch to buy any house. Some stretch more so they don’t feel like they’re taking a step down. At the same time, they have wealthy friends who spend more. People feel financially strapped.


Then don't throw a party if you can't afford it.

I'm solidly middle class (less than 150k HHI), and still host properly.


I 💯 think this is a UMC thing. Middle class people are generous at parties. Wealthy people throw extravagant parties with amazing food. Lower income people always have ample food at parties. This is UMC stinginess and I personally find it gross. These are people who never learned how to share freely.