Anonymous
Post 07/20/2023 18:58     Subject: "Died unexpectedly" in obit

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Suicide or OD 90% of the time. If it was a natural 'suddenly' (ie stroke or heart attack) it's usually spelled out to avoid the implications of the aforementioned causes.


This. If it's a heart attack, the obit will say heart attack


Not always. I know of two people who died of a heart attack and one obituary said “unexpectedly” and one said “after a sudden illness.”

You know what they say about those who ASSume. Look at you, true to form.


May I ask why you are so hostile?

It is human curiosity to inquire how people died. When I read "died unexpectedly" I do think overdoses. Obits go out of their way to avoid mentioning overdoses whereas for other deaths they're usually upfront. Including suicides ("took his life."


I write obituaries as part of my job. You are wrong. Plain and simple, you are wrong. Just like there is no wrong or right way to grieve, there is no wrong or right way for a family to decide what to share and what not to share in an obituary, nor is there a wrong way for a grieving family to find the word choices that work for them. I have written the following as “died unexpectedly/died suddenly,” and I have read the following as “died unexpectedly/died suddenly,” when I was a friend or close family member who knew the cause of death:
-Heart attack
-Horrible ATV accident
-Aneurysm
-Hit in the head by a tree branch
-Undiagnosed congenital heart defect, and the family didn’t want to wait for autopsy report before moving forward with funeral
-Child who accidentally choked at home
-Yes, accidental overdose
-Yes, suicide

You are incorrect to ASSume. Of course curiosity is natural—we all feel it. Kind, intelligent, respectful people go beyond their base instincts and act in a civilized manner, which is to say they do not feel entitled to private family information, they do not feel entitled to invade privacy of the family and of the deceased, and they do not dishonor the family and the deceased by gossiping and speculating. Those who gossip and speculate and spread rumors and false information and conspiracy theories are absolute garbage.


You are a sock puppet who has now posted 7 times in this thread pretending to be others. Next of kin writes obits, not other people. Nice try, loser.

Suicide- I guarnatee.


The writer could work in a funeral home. They help families with wording.
Anonymous
Post 07/20/2023 18:53     Subject: "Died unexpectedly" in obit

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Suicide or OD 90% of the time. If it was a natural 'suddenly' (ie stroke or heart attack) it's usually spelled out to avoid the implications of the aforementioned causes.


This. If it's a heart attack, the obit will say heart attack


Not always. I know of two people who died of a heart attack and one obituary said “unexpectedly” and one said “after a sudden illness.”

You know what they say about those who ASSume. Look at you, true to form.


May I ask why you are so hostile?

It is human curiosity to inquire how people died. When I read "died unexpectedly" I do think overdoses. Obits go out of their way to avoid mentioning overdoses whereas for other deaths they're usually upfront. Including suicides ("took his life."


I write obituaries as part of my job. You are wrong. Plain and simple, you are wrong. Just like there is no wrong or right way to grieve, there is no wrong or right way for a family to decide what to share and what not to share in an obituary, nor is there a wrong way for a grieving family to find the word choices that work for them. I have written the following as “died unexpectedly/died suddenly,” and I have read the following as “died unexpectedly/died suddenly,” when I was a friend or close family member who knew the cause of death:
-Heart attack
-Horrible ATV accident
-Aneurysm
-Hit in the head by a tree branch
-Undiagnosed congenital heart defect, and the family didn’t want to wait for autopsy report before moving forward with funeral
-Child who accidentally choked at home
-Yes, accidental overdose
-Yes, suicide

You are incorrect to ASSume. Of course curiosity is natural—we all feel it. Kind, intelligent, respectful people go beyond their base instincts and act in a civilized manner, which is to say they do not feel entitled to private family information, they do not feel entitled to invade privacy of the family and of the deceased, and they do not dishonor the family and the deceased by gossiping and speculating. Those who gossip and speculate and spread rumors and false information and conspiracy theories are absolute garbage.


You are a sock puppet who has now posted 7 times in this thread pretending to be others. Next of kin writes obits, not other people. Nice try, loser.

Suicide- I guarnatee.
Anonymous
Post 07/20/2023 18:42     Subject: "Died unexpectedly" in obit

Anonymous wrote:Suicide or OD.

If they could have truthfully said "passed away peacefully, surrounded by family, after a brief illness" they would have.

But they can't because he either blew his head off or OD'd on fentanyl.


Presumptuous.

Maybe it was a heart attack or stroke or aortic aneurysm or brain aneurysm or a fall or meningitis or asthma attack or choking or other.
Anonymous
Post 07/20/2023 18:41     Subject: "Died unexpectedly" in obit

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I guess seeing someone retire early from a very lucrative position at such an early age makes me wonder if "retired" = "fired" because of a some mental or addiction problem, followed by suicide or OD soon thereafter.


You have an interesting bias in life. I would assume that the person was diagnosed with something terminal and decided to make his remaining time as meaningful as possible while he could, but the disease progressed much faster than expected.


This is OP. I guess I remember this person as somewhat insecure and competitive and reminds me of a similar person I knew who did actually die of suicide and had a very similar personality.


You are absolutely disgusting.


+1 everything OP is saying is making this nosy interest in someone's death seem more and more gross
Anonymous
Post 07/20/2023 18:40     Subject: "Died unexpectedly" in obit

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Suicide or OD 90% of the time. If it was a natural 'suddenly' (ie stroke or heart attack) it's usually spelled out to avoid the implications of the aforementioned causes.


This. If it's a heart attack, the obit will say heart attack


Not always. I know of two people who died of a heart attack and one obituary said “unexpectedly” and one said “after a sudden illness.”

You know what they say about those who ASSume. Look at you, true to form.


May I ask why you are so hostile?

It is human curiosity to inquire how people died. When I read "died unexpectedly" I do think overdoses. Obits go out of their way to avoid mentioning overdoses whereas for other deaths they're usually upfront. Including suicides ("took his life."


I write obituaries as part of my job. You are wrong. Plain and simple, you are wrong. Just like there is no wrong or right way to grieve, there is no wrong or right way for a family to decide what to share and what not to share in an obituary, nor is there a wrong way for a grieving family to find the word choices that work for them. I have written the following as “died unexpectedly/died suddenly,” and I have read the following as “died unexpectedly/died suddenly,” when I was a friend or close family member who knew the cause of death:
-Heart attack
-Horrible ATV accident
-Aneurysm
-Hit in the head by a tree branch
-Undiagnosed congenital heart defect, and the family didn’t want to wait for autopsy report before moving forward with funeral
-Child who accidentally choked at home
-Yes, accidental overdose
-Yes, suicide

You are incorrect to ASSume. Of course curiosity is natural—we all feel it. Kind, intelligent, respectful people go beyond their base instincts and act in a civilized manner, which is to say they do not feel entitled to private family information, they do not feel entitled to invade privacy of the family and of the deceased, and they do not dishonor the family and the deceased by gossiping and speculating. Those who gossip and speculate and spread rumors and false information and conspiracy theories are absolute garbage.
Anonymous
Post 07/20/2023 18:37     Subject: "Died unexpectedly" in obit

Maybe he retired early because he had concerning symptoms and was
just starting treatment and or awaiting a diagnosis. It’s entirely plausible therefore that his death was unexpected- could have died in his sleep or had a heart attack.
Anonymous
Post 07/20/2023 18:33     Subject: "Died unexpectedly" in obit

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Suicide or OD 90% of the time. If it was a natural 'suddenly' (ie stroke or heart attack) it's usually spelled out to avoid the implications of the aforementioned causes.


This. If it's a heart attack, the obit will say heart attack


Not always. I know of two people who died of a heart attack and one obituary said “unexpectedly” and one said “after a sudden illness.”

You know what they say about those who ASSume. Look at you, true to form.


May I ask why you are so hostile?

It is human curiosity to inquire how people died. When I read "died unexpectedly" I do think overdoses. Obits go out of their way to avoid mentioning overdoses whereas for other deaths they're usually upfront. Including suicides ("took his life."


Not trie. See pp.
Anonymous
Post 07/20/2023 18:32     Subject: "Died unexpectedly" in obit

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Suicide or OD 90% of the time. If it was a natural 'suddenly' (ie stroke or heart attack) it's usually spelled out to avoid the implications of the aforementioned causes.


This. If it's a heart attack, the obit will say heart attack


Not always. I know of two people who died of a heart attack and one obituary said “unexpectedly” and one said “after a sudden illness.”

You know what they say about those who ASSume. Look at you, true to form.


May I ask why you are so hostile?

It is human curiosity to inquire how people died. When I read "died unexpectedly" I do think overdoses. Obits go out of their way to avoid mentioning overdoses whereas for other deaths they're usually upfront. Including suicides ("took his life."
Anonymous
Post 07/20/2023 18:29     Subject: "Died unexpectedly" in obit

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes the cause of death has yet to be determined (and may never be determined) at the time the obit was written. Some deaths are mysterious. I'd still give it a 50% chance it was a suicide.


Agree because someone actually had to sign off re: “cause”.
Anonymous
Post 07/20/2023 17:53     Subject: "Died unexpectedly" in obit

OP what the obit says in this case isn’t code. You didn’t know before and you still don’t know, and they don’t want to tell you via the obit or perhaps at all.
Anonymous
Post 07/20/2023 17:53     Subject: Re:"Died unexpectedly" in obit

My 54-year-old sister dropped dead mid-sentence in the middle of my parents' care center room. No idea what caused it. I believe my BIL put "unexpectedly" in the obit. At her funeral, I got into a conversation with a friend of hers, who I did not know, and a few minutes in I realized this woman had assumed my sister killed herself. I found a way to insert something ilke, yeah, it's hard enough on my parents to lose a daughter, much less be standing there helpless after she dropped dead out of nowhere right in front of them.
Anonymous
Post 07/20/2023 17:46     Subject: Re:"Died unexpectedly" in obit

Anonymous wrote:Died unexpectedly could mean all of the causes previously mentioned or it could mean a freak accident, like a tree fell on him, or it could mean that the cause of death is unknown because the autopsy results haven’t come back. It’s unkind to speculate about an unseemly cause.


This. Maybe an autopsy was required. Look how long it took for the results of Lisa Marie Presley. The funeral could take place before the results are known. The family may not see a need to release the results.
Anonymous
Post 07/20/2023 17:36     Subject: "Died unexpectedly" in obit

Anonymous wrote:A 50yr old in my neighborhood died and that is how his obit read. He had a heart attack.


I know someone who had a fall and it was worded that way too.
Anonymous
Post 07/20/2023 17:32     Subject: "Died unexpectedly" in obit

A 50yr old in my neighborhood died and that is how his obit read. He had a heart attack.
Anonymous
Post 07/20/2023 17:26     Subject: "Died unexpectedly" in obit

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I know of two separate cases where it was undiagnosed late stage cancer. Terminal, obviously.

My father died just a month and a half after his cancer was discovered. He went to the ER with bad back pain and it turns out that he was riddled with cancer. My mom was bothered by the idea that everyone would assume he died of covid (though I have no idea why), so his obituary said he died after a brief battle with cancer. The truth is, there was no battle. It was too late for anything but hospice.


Yeah, but it headed off people like op!