Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I have those thoughts in the dark of the night too. Mine are 24 and 26 and I know that I will never be free.Anonymous wrote:I see now how naive I was about what parenthood is like, and my reasons for wanting kids were short-sighted, stupid, and selfish.
And now I’m paying for it. I will never be free.
No need to feel sorry for my kids. They have a good life, and I block out these feelings during the day. It’s only at night when everyone is asleep and the house is quiet and still enough for these feelings to creep up that I’m overcome with sorrow.
That is all.
Not OP but do you mind sharing more? Are they SN? In my mind I am hoping to be free at about 18-20 year mark for my kid, so…
I’m not PP but I can understand what they mean. Even without SN and without actually physically caring for a kid anymore, there’s always the mental aspect of parenting that will be present as long as your kids live. There will never be a time where I’m truly free, of the mental load and emotional investment in parenting, even once my kids are grown.
Oh and having kids when you already suffer from anxiety is next level stress. I don’t regret but have my moments of what if I were free. It’s natural to feel this sometimes even if people don’t talk openly about it.
I am probably in denial but I am hoping I can let go at some point…
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I have those thoughts in the dark of the night too. Mine are 24 and 26 and I know that I will never be free.Anonymous wrote:I see now how naive I was about what parenthood is like, and my reasons for wanting kids were short-sighted, stupid, and selfish.
And now I’m paying for it. I will never be free.
No need to feel sorry for my kids. They have a good life, and I block out these feelings during the day. It’s only at night when everyone is asleep and the house is quiet and still enough for these feelings to creep up that I’m overcome with sorrow.
That is all.
Not OP but do you mind sharing more? Are they SN? In my mind I am hoping to be free at about 18-20 year mark for my kid, so…
One has ASD, level one low support. One has multiple LDs and ADHD, anxiety and other issues. The second is in grad school and needs quite a bit of emotional support. The first one has a good job and just moved out to their own apartment but needs some support to keep it up and that won’t change.
According to the LCSW we see, we should have a bit more freedom when they hit 30- it will be gradual.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I have those thoughts in the dark of the night too. Mine are 24 and 26 and I know that I will never be free.Anonymous wrote:I see now how naive I was about what parenthood is like, and my reasons for wanting kids were short-sighted, stupid, and selfish.
And now I’m paying for it. I will never be free.
No need to feel sorry for my kids. They have a good life, and I block out these feelings during the day. It’s only at night when everyone is asleep and the house is quiet and still enough for these feelings to creep up that I’m overcome with sorrow.
That is all.
Not OP but do you mind sharing more? Are they SN? In my mind I am hoping to be free at about 18-20 year mark for my kid, so…
I’m not PP but I can understand what they mean. Even without SN and without actually physically caring for a kid anymore, there’s always the mental aspect of parenting that will be present as long as your kids live. There will never be a time where I’m truly free, of the mental load and emotional investment in parenting, even once my kids are grown.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:If you’re wealthy send them to summer-long sleepaway camps, junior boarding school & then boarding school
Sad “solution”
Anonymous wrote:If you’re wealthy send them to summer-long sleepaway camps, junior boarding school & then boarding school
Anonymous wrote:I see now how naive I was about what parenthood is like, and my reasons for wanting kids were short-sighted, stupid, and selfish.
And now I’m paying for it. I will never be free.
No need to feel sorry for my kids. They have a good life, and I block out these feelings during the day. It’s only at night when everyone is asleep and the house is quiet and still enough for these feelings to creep up that I’m overcome with sorrow.
That is all.
Anonymous wrote:me too. mine are 29 and 31!
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I have those thoughts in the dark of the night too. Mine are 24 and 26 and I know that I will never be free.Anonymous wrote:I see now how naive I was about what parenthood is like, and my reasons for wanting kids were short-sighted, stupid, and selfish.
And now I’m paying for it. I will never be free.
No need to feel sorry for my kids. They have a good life, and I block out these feelings during the day. It’s only at night when everyone is asleep and the house is quiet and still enough for these feelings to creep up that I’m overcome with sorrow.
That is all.
Not OP but do you mind sharing more? Are they SN? In my mind I am hoping to be free at about 18-20 year mark for my kid, so…