Anonymous wrote:Just last night, my mom (80) called me (54) to say "I just got a notification that your package arrived. Did you see it outside?" I'm like, what package, huh? I go get a package, and she sent me a mug that says "Sometimes you forget you're awesome so this is your reminder." I'm drinking out of it right now. She was so happy to send that mug, and said "it's not even your birthday!" when we were talking last night. Such a sweet thing to do, and it honestly made my day!
From childhood, we moved from one state to another, building a house that wouldn't be ready for months after we sold the one we were living in. My mom decided we would take an epic road trip across the United States, and my dad could fly in and meet us when he could. The "rules" were that when it was just my mom, if we saw anything we wanted to see we'd stop. We'd wing it. Three kids and mom. When my dad was with us, we had to have an itinerary (that would be me today!!). So for the entire summer we wandered the U.S. before making it back to our new city, where we settled in a hotel for another six weeks while the house was finished. It was the greatest summer and start to school ever. We all loved it so much.
Aww, these stories are great. I think I've turned a corner, DCUM. I used to be envious and cry about the mother wound, but now I'm genuinely happy for you all.
My 40th bday just passed. No call, text, card, email... nothing. I have 3 kids and live 20 mins away from my parents. I can count the number of times they've met my eldest on one hand. They've never even met my youngest. She's 2. My mom truly is the worst. I don't think she did the best she could or any of that. I think she is deeply disturbed and has never even considered seeking treatment. She has no friends or social life, limiting her sphere to just a few maladapted enablers.
I often wonder how it will hit me when she dies. In some ways, I've been waiting for that day to come my entire life. Will it finally be a sweet release?
I relate to the PP whose mother makes it clear her family is not priority. I've been getting the message that I'm an unwelcome burden for my entire life.