Anonymous
Post 01/31/2023 21:22     Subject: student loan debt
I got married at 25. However both of us have heavy loans ($200k each) from med school. It’s fine. We are paying over 30 years. My kids are almost college age and we’ll still be paying our loans.
Anonymous
Post 01/31/2023 21:07     Subject: student loan debt
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It's perfectly sensible to take out big loans if you're sure you're going to spend the 10 years in public service to get the forgiveness. I know a ton of people who are currently getting everything forgiven. BIG debts.


PSLF doesn't cover private loans and public loans are capped far lower


Once they marry she won’t qualify for pslf without income based repayment which would take a big chunk of his income.


Eh, no. I know lots of people on PSLF with high earning partners with very manageable loan payments.
Anonymous
Post 01/31/2023 21:06     Subject: student loan debt
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It's perfectly sensible to take out big loans if you're sure you're going to spend the 10 years in public service to get the forgiveness. I know a ton of people who are currently getting everything forgiven. BIG debts.


PSLF doesn't cover private loans and public loans are capped far lower


Once they marry she won’t qualify for pslf without income based repayment which would take a big chunk of his income.
Anonymous
Post 01/31/2023 20:57     Subject: student loan debt
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I’d advise your son to wait for another 2 years post gf’s graduation. The huge debt can be an impediment in their ability to become financially stable. Are the 2 in the same page regarding budgeting and expenses? Finances can cause friction in relationships especially if there’s inequality in the debt burden coming in as a married couple. Is your son really okay with that huge debt?


+1. No harm in waiting a few years.


There is harm to the woman whose time you’re wasting. Infertility causes tension in marriage and costs as much as the young woman’s debt to address (if you’re lucky!). OPs son should break up with her so she can find an independent adult to start a family with.


Infertility at age 27 vs 24??? You can’t be serious.


Such a dumb thing to say. She needs more time to find a good guy then get engaged then get married then start trying. You don’t go from dumped by one guy to TTC inside 6 months.
Anonymous
Post 01/31/2023 20:55     Subject: student loan debt
I would recommend pre marital counseling where they talk seriously about financial plans. Ie: we will prioritize paying off the student loans so we will each put 20%/40% of our salary towards that and postpone getting house cars baby, etc, until it’s gone.

Anonymous
Post 01/31/2023 20:55     Subject: student loan debt
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I’d advise your son to wait for another 2 years post gf’s graduation. The huge debt can be an impediment in their ability to become financially stable. Are the 2 in the same page regarding budgeting and expenses? Finances can cause friction in relationships especially if there’s inequality in the debt burden coming in as a married couple. Is your son really okay with that huge debt?


+1. No harm in waiting a few years.


There is harm to the woman whose time you’re wasting. Infertility causes tension in marriage and costs as much as the young woman’s debt to address (if you’re lucky!). OPs son should break up with her so she can find an independent adult to start a family with.


Infertility at age 27 vs 24??? You can’t be serious.


Most people want to be married a few years before having children. So it’s infertility at 30-35 vs infertility at 25-30 and yes, those are statistically different.

Not to mention most people suffering with infertility don’t have to blame their in laws greed for their situation. This is a disaster waiting to happen.
Anonymous
Post 01/31/2023 20:44     Subject: student loan debt
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I’d advise your son to wait for another 2 years post gf’s graduation. The huge debt can be an impediment in their ability to become financially stable. Are the 2 in the same page regarding budgeting and expenses? Finances can cause friction in relationships especially if there’s inequality in the debt burden coming in as a married couple. Is your son really okay with that huge debt?


+1. No harm in waiting a few years.


There is harm to the woman whose time you’re wasting. Infertility causes tension in marriage and costs as much as the young woman’s debt to address (if you’re lucky!). OPs son should break up with her so she can find an independent adult to start a family with.


Infertility at age 27 vs 24??? You can’t be serious.
Anonymous
Post 01/31/2023 20:42     Subject: student loan debt
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I’d advise your son to wait for another 2 years post gf’s graduation. The huge debt can be an impediment in their ability to become financially stable. Are the 2 in the same page regarding budgeting and expenses? Finances can cause friction in relationships especially if there’s inequality in the debt burden coming in as a married couple. Is your son really okay with that huge debt?


+1. No harm in waiting a few years.


There is harm to the woman whose time you’re wasting. Infertility causes tension in marriage and costs as much as the young woman’s debt to address (if you’re lucky!). OPs son should break up with her so she can find an independent adult to start a family with.
Anonymous
Post 01/31/2023 20:31     Subject: Re:student loan debt
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I would tell your son not to marry her. If she round up so much debt for an education degree, she’s gonna be milking him and get the hell out.


I have to agree. Bad financial sense gets worse. She is getting a $220,000 masters to take a job making $55,000!


UVA undergrad put her in a position to marry a UVA CS major. That's a much better situation than having no debt, the same job and a degree from Longwood


I would rather have no degree at all than have $220k in student loan debt.



She’s going to be married to a very high earner while she teacher and raises a family. It sounds like she’ll be fine


Yes because we all know marriages at age 25 work out real well.


Are the stats worse than people who marry at 35?


Yes.


Not for two people with advanced degrees in their first marriage they aren’t.

She shouldn’t get married to this guy because she will have nightmare in laws. She should go find someone who can get married without asking mommy and daddy if he’s allowed.
Anonymous
Post 01/31/2023 20:29     Subject: Re:student loan debt
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I would tell your son not to marry her. If she round up so much debt for an education degree, she’s gonna be milking him and get the hell out.


I have to agree. Bad financial sense gets worse. She is getting a $220,000 masters to take a job making $55,000!


UVA undergrad put her in a position to marry a UVA CS major. That's a much better situation than having no debt, the same job and a degree from Longwood


I would rather have no degree at all than have $220k in student loan debt.



She’s going to be married to a very high earner while she teacher and raises a family. It sounds like she’ll be fine


Yes because we all know marriages at age 25 work out real well.


Are the stats worse than people who marry at 35?


Yes.
Anonymous
Post 01/31/2023 20:28     Subject: student loan debt
Anonymous wrote:I’d advise your son to wait for another 2 years post gf’s graduation. The huge debt can be an impediment in their ability to become financially stable. Are the 2 in the same page regarding budgeting and expenses? Finances can cause friction in relationships especially if there’s inequality in the debt burden coming in as a married couple. Is your son really okay with that huge debt?


+1. No harm in waiting a few years.
Anonymous
Post 01/31/2023 18:50     Subject: Re:student loan debt
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I would tell your son not to marry her. If she round up so much debt for an education degree, she’s gonna be milking him and get the hell out.


I have to agree. Bad financial sense gets worse. She is getting a $220,000 masters to take a job making $55,000!


UVA undergrad put her in a position to marry a UVA CS major. That's a much better situation than having no debt, the same job and a degree from Longwood


I would rather have no degree at all than have $220k in student loan debt.



She’s going to be married to a very high earner while she teacher and raises a family. It sounds like she’ll be fine


Yes because we all know marriages at age 25 work out real well.


Are the stats worse than people who marry at 35?
Anonymous
Post 01/31/2023 18:49     Subject: Re:student loan debt
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP only $27k of those loans are in the GF’s name. The rest, the, $197k is 100% in her parents’ names and GF has absolutely zero legal responsibility to pay those, only her parents do. Hope that clears things up for OP and other readers because a lot of people take out PP loans with informal, unenforceable “agreements” that they’re somehow the kid’s loans.


Private loans are co-signed. That makes them both parties’ responsibility


Parent Plus Loans are not private and are not co-signed. They are 100% in the parents’ name(s). Private loans, like Sallie Mae or CollegeAve, are co-signed, correct. I believe OP specified that GF’s loans are private not parent plus, no?


OP said private, so she’s on the hook
Anonymous
Post 01/31/2023 18:49     Subject: Re:student loan debt
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I would tell your son not to marry her. If she round up so much debt for an education degree, she’s gonna be milking him and get the hell out.


I have to agree. Bad financial sense gets worse. She is getting a $220,000 masters to take a job making $55,000!


UVA undergrad put her in a position to marry a UVA CS major. That's a much better situation than having no debt, the same job and a degree from Longwood


I would rather have no degree at all than have $220k in student loan debt.



She’s going to be married to a very high earner while she teacher and raises a family. It sounds like she’ll be fine


Yes because we all know marriages at age 25 work out real well.
Anonymous
Post 01/31/2023 18:47     Subject: Re:student loan debt
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP only $27k of those loans are in the GF’s name. The rest, the, $197k is 100% in her parents’ names and GF has absolutely zero legal responsibility to pay those, only her parents do. Hope that clears things up for OP and other readers because a lot of people take out PP loans with informal, unenforceable “agreements” that they’re somehow the kid’s loans.


Private loans are co-signed. That makes them both parties’ responsibility


Parent Plus Loans are not private and are not co-signed. They are 100% in the parents’ name(s). Private loans, like Sallie Mae or CollegeAve, are co-signed, correct. I believe OP specified that GF’s loans are private not parent plus, no?