Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wish my husband would lose 40 pounds. I hate that I'm not attracted to him. And no--I'm not that fit. I'm just shallow. We both struggle with our weight, so I don't blame him or think less of him for it. He tries, just like I do. But I can't really help it. He looks more and more like his father to me. He's not an unattractive man, and he's never been skinny. But something about the age and the weight together--I don't know. I really wish I could feel attracted to him again. But it's just not there anymore.

It's OK, he is not that into you either anymore; you probably remind him of your fat mom. In any case, if he cared, he'd do something about it. But he knows you are disposable.

Anonymous wrote:The more attractive a man is, the more successful a man is, the more his options increase, and I like that I am really attracted to my DH but not necessarily everyone else is.

I know a really tall, attractive man who is constantly hit on my women. A friend feels sorry for his wife because that's a lot of women to fend off, and sometimes she actively has to!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wish my husband would lose 40 pounds. I hate that I'm not attracted to him. And no--I'm not that fit. I'm just shallow. We both struggle with our weight, so I don't blame him or think less of him for it. He tries, just like I do. But I can't really help it. He looks more and more like his father to me. He's not an unattractive man, and he's never been skinny. But something about the age and the weight together--I don't know. I really wish I could feel attracted to him again. But it's just not there anymore.

It's OK, he is not that into you either anymore; you probably remind him of your fat mom. In any case, if he cared, he'd do something about it. But he knows you are disposable.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The more attractive a man is, the more successful a man is, the more his options increase, and I like that I am really attracted to my DH but not necessarily everyone else is.

I know a really tall, attractive man who is constantly hit on my women. A friend feels sorry for his wife because that's a lot of women to fend off, and sometimes she actively has to!

Yep. My husband has had women chasing him hard since I met him when he was 25. He appeals to women of all ages…still at 51.

I have always been equivalent in looks, fitness, intelligence career- [/b]but women are ruthless. Men seem to respect the ring on a finger more than the women that see it as a “challenge”.

It can be exhausting. And if you lose trust over time…awful.

[b]


This is the raw unadorned truth. Internalized sexism and a desperate clawing at limited resources. The more competitive women become over promotions and seats in political office the better it will be for our daughters.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wish my husband would lose 40 pounds. I hate that I'm not attracted to him. And no--I'm not that fit. I'm just shallow. We both struggle with our weight, so I don't blame him or think less of him for it. He tries, just like I do. But I can't really help it. He looks more and more like his father to me. He's not an unattractive man, and he's never been skinny. But something about the age and the weight together--I don't know. I really wish I could feel attracted to him again. But it's just not there anymore.

It's OK, he is not that into you either anymore; you probably remind him of your fat mom. In any case, if he cared, he'd do something about it. But he knows you are disposable.

Anonymous wrote:I wish my husband would lose 40 pounds. I hate that I'm not attracted to him. And no--I'm not that fit. I'm just shallow. We both struggle with our weight, so I don't blame him or think less of him for it. He tries, just like I do. But I can't really help it. He looks more and more like his father to me. He's not an unattractive man, and he's never been skinny. But something about the age and the weight together--I don't know. I really wish I could feel attracted to him again. But it's just not there anymore.

Anonymous wrote:I don't feel this way at all. For some reason TBH I feel... suspicious probably isn't the right word but I feel something not positive about super good looking men who put more than average effort into their looks.
I have always been way more into personality than looks though, BDE is real to me!

Plus I always wanted to be better looking than my husband so I wouldn't have to be perpetually self conscious about my looks.
I also feel that a lot of men are still attractive as they age while many women lose their looks so it would compound the issue if my DH were already better looking.

Anonymous wrote:I cannot sleep with a man I find unattractive. Looks are important, personality is important, hygiene brains, morals are also important to me. I do not care if the person is not too wealthy. MC is fine by me. But, my ovaries would shrivel into dust if the man was unattractive, unclean, dumb, obnoxious or a jerk. Eeeekkk.

That is the reason that I admire the Kardashians. They end up with really hideous looking or weird men. How are they sleeping with them? Or having kids with them? These are women who are not shallow at all.

Similarly, women like Melania who married Donnie. She had to sleep with him at least once or twice, right? That woman has done so much to help her parents out of a communist country and bring them to America. This is for me a great example of filial piety and self sacrifice!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Would a mini makeover help him be more attractive again? My husband went from a 4 to a 9 with new haircut, facial hair, and clothes in his best colors (He had no idea). He should have been scooped YEARS before I met him, but other women must not have had vision. The beard is a non-negotiable presence in our marriage. He has lots of sway over my styling in return.

Should she make over her kids too ?

Mommy thinks you're ugly baby we're going to fix you up

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

DH isn’t ugly but he’s less attractive than me and sometimes I feel annoyed by it for some reason. Or jealous of friends with more attractive husbands. Also, our kids have some of his less attractive features which which I feel annoyed about too sometimes…

I know, I’m horrible. Can anyone relate though? How do I get over it?

How do you know he is less attractive?

Men may pay more attention to you than women do to him. However, this would mean little since men might be paying attention because they sense your contempt and believe you are open to sex.

Women are objectively more attractive than men. Again, this means little since the relevant factor is marketability, meaning which of the two of you is more likely to land a relationship post-divorce is the more important.

Now, marketability could mean who is more likely to find hook-up sex. Clearly, a married woman who is even moderately attractive could find sex easier than an attractive married man.

You think you are hotter? Here is how you get over it. Stop being horrible and cut him free (via divorce.) He will find more women to form relationships with and may find someone who treats him well.

Women are objectively more attractive than men? Huh?

Anonymous wrote:

Women are objectively more attractive than men? Huh?

Yes, I think a woman's body (or appearance) is more attractive than a man's.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The more attractive a man is, the more successful a man is, the more his options increase, and I like that I am really attracted to my DH but not necessarily everyone else is.

I know a really tall, attractive man who is constantly hit on my women. A friend feels sorry for his wife because that's a lot of women to fend off, and sometimes she actively has to!

Yep. My husband has had women chasing him hard since I met him when he was 25. He appeals to women of all ages…still at 51.

I have always been equivalent in looks, fitness, intelligence career- [/b]but women are ruthless. Men seem to respect the ring on a finger more than the women that see it as a “challenge”.

It can be exhausting. And if you lose trust over time…awful.