Anonymous wrote:As ever, HHI is only one of a handful of crucial factors.

It's all about the mortgage, IMO. With a PITI under 1600 the number is lower than if your PITI is 3000, obviously.

Anonymous wrote:$125K+ It really depends on your expenses.

We had one income when the earning spouse made $98K. It was tight but do-able with grandparents contributing annually to the college fund.

When the main income went above $110 a year things felt less tight. Again, with grandparents giving 16K a year to kids' college funds.

Now at $145K for the earning spouse, and $10K a year from the non working spouse with a side hustle, we feel flush with cash and have upped our charitable giving to $350 a month.

Anonymous wrote:$150 for us. One kid.

We did this for a few years with 2 kids, and DH still maxed out retirement contributions. Ultimately I wanted to go back to work because we needed more money for all of the extra things, and I wanted to increase my retirement contributions.

Anonymous wrote:Don't stay at home spouses realize they are losing out on retirement savings like 401k + Employer match?

Of course they realize that. It is still possible to retire with one income if you're smart about saving and investing. Also, a lot of SAH parents do it for a few years then eventually go back to some type of work.

used to be 200k but with inflations its about 400k

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:$150 for us. One kid.

Must add - 11 yr old kid in private and many activities and one big trip. But first we paid off cars and home and had $1M in retirement. House worth $800k. 529 is about $200k. I retired at 45 last year. DH will retire in 12 years.

You are role model.

easier to do with one kid. Much harder with multiple.

We have $320K in college savings for 2 kids and still adding to it; $2.5mil in retirement/savings, no loans other than $180K mortgage with $700K home equity. We are in our 50s, and we want to retire early. But, private health insurance is expensive, and health issues go up as you get older.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:$150 for us. One kid.

Us too. I worked until the kid was 5. Our expenses are very low and our savings above average. We live in DC.

So your parents bought you a house?

Anonymous wrote:$150 for us. One kid.

Us too. I worked until the kid was 5. Our expenses are very low and our savings above average. We live in DC.

Anonymous wrote:We did it with $150K and three kids in NoVA.

that would be super tight if you are also trying to max out retirement.

We did it at $140K -- two kids -- but it was super tight. $160K gave us some breathing room but only barely. I don't think we were contributing to a college fund at that point (kids were early ES).

Agree with PPs that it really depends on your expenses.

I would say if you don't have an extra $1k every month after all expenses and saving for retirement, then it's questionable.

I don't know how old OP's kids are, but mine are now teens, and kids get more expensive as they get older.

There is so much more to it than money. Childcare - once you get to more than two kids, it seems like it would make sense to stay home. Work:life balance - does someone have a flexible enough job to be home when kids are home from school, summer camps, etc.

I had the luxury to have a job where I could work a part-time
job that I loved when the kids were little. My husband made around $125K at that time - I pulled in around $60K, part time. I tried the SAHM life, but it wasn't for me in a full time state.

Anonymous wrote:Is the number different from what would be required for a husband to stay home?

Hahaha good one

We both earned 60k each when I decided to stay home. Income slashed in half, but we made it work.

Anonymous wrote:My DH makes about 320k and I could SAH on this. I make 250k and he could SAH on my income as well. However it would greatly hamper our financial goals.

The key point is financial goals. I know a mid 40s couple that has $10M (after tax) from a company sale. Husband is "retired" and takes one-off gigs. Wife takes care of the kids. I doubt they make more than $400k in HHI, but already have the big slug taken care of.

I decided to stay home after my DH income went over $500k. My salary truly wasn't making a dent in our finances any longer and my time was better appreciated at home.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't stay at home spouses realize they are losing out on retirement savings like 401k + Employer match?

I’m not a SAHM partially for this reason, but yes, I imagine they do. They are choosing to raise their kids full time.

Thank you. I am always amazed at how people think SAHMs and their husbands don’t consider basic finances when making the choice for one spouse to stay home.