Anonymous wrote:What do you wear when you want to look great but like you didn't have to try hard to achieve that greatness? Smart casual edition.

In other words, when you're an accomplished 42 year old woman supposed to go out for drinks on Saturday night in a cool restaurant bar with a friend for your monthly catch up session and she asks if it's okay if she brings along a couple other people who are just in town for a couple days and you say "sure, the more the merrier!" but then you find out that couple other people are none other than the girl who tortured you for being uncool in middle school and the guy who turned you down for a Sadie Hawkins dance in ninth grade...what do you wear?

Damn.

I can't wait to see what other people suggest. Just glancing at the first few comments, I think a dress is too much in this situation. I would go with a very current/flattering pair of jeans. Maybe black, but blue jeans work, too.

A pretty, stylish top like this: https://www.nordstrom.com/s/sequin-keyhole-neck-blouse/7121015?origin=coordinating-7121015-0-3-PDP_1-recbot-also_viewed_graph&recs_placement=PDP_1&recs_strategy=also_viewed_graph&recs_source=recbot&recs_page_type=product&recs_seed=6473911&color=RICH%20BLACK

Black booties or something like that. Simple jewelry.

Another idea is a soft sweater in your favorite/most flattering color. Something that makes you feel great.

Anonymous wrote:Ok hear me out I know that these are Abercrombie but they are amazing and come in like 20 different washes https://www.abercrombie.com/shop/us/p/90s-ultra-high-rise-straight-jeans-47017866?seq=18&source=googleshopping&cmp=PLA:EVG:20:A:USCA:X:GGL:X:SHOP:X:X:X:X:A%26F+Adults_Google_Shopping_SSC_US_Zombie_All+products_PRODUCT_GROUP&gclid=Cj0KCQjwnbmaBhD-ARIsAGTPcfVZrZKpROj_HsBi2JO_FAZGo3LWhVWqaQcbdP4QpemadEBs3FXhlIIaAri_EALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds

Options to go with:
1. https://www.abercrombie.com/shop/us/p/90s-ultra-high-rise-straight-jeans-47017866?seq=18&source=googleshopping&cmp=PLA:EVG:20:A:USCA:X:GGL:X:SHOP:X:X:X:X:A%26F+Adults_Google_Shopping_SSC_US_Zombie_All+products_PRODUCT_GROUP&gclid=Cj0KCQjwnbmaBhD-ARIsAGTPcfVZrZKpROj_HsBi2JO_FAZGo3LWhVWqaQcbdP4QpemadEBs3FXhlIIaAri_EALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds and this https://bananarepublicfactory.gapfactory.com/browse/product.do?pid=402846011&vid=1&tid=bfpl000029&kwid=1&ap=7&gclid=Cj0KCQjwnbmaBhD-ARIsAGTPcfXsnUjucysUyzIT_y06gl2s3EYR87CksUhrhuxGBdda5qj8PySukeUaAm54EALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds#pdp-page-content

2. https://bananarepublic.gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=746496032&vid=1&tid=brpl000047&kwid=1&ap=7&gclid=Cj0KCQjwnbmaBhD-ARIsAGTPcfXREKOJeyVnXxHvT8VptGG4BnCHcaD3sYdqwnmyNMFKkdJk0cMs3ekaAv-kEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds#pdp-page-content with hoop earrings as shown

Or dress like this https://bananarepublic.gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=745471072&vid=1&tid=brpl000047&kwid=1&ap=7&gclid=Cj0KCQjwnbmaBhD-ARIsAGTPcfWUbrWgjTyZWn-v4-I-7CdAvFAkNlRU0Uoqri7oLNB2e3QU2L9YtngaArdZEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds#pdp-page-content

Or jumpsuit (can also be paired with above Moto jacket)
https://www.lulus.com/products/in-the-city-black-surplice-sleeveless-jumpsuit/875282.html

shoot the second jeans link is supposed to be this to go with the jeans and Moto jacket https://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=873053002&vid=1&tid=onpl000078&kwid=1&ap=7&gclid=Cj0KCQjwnbmaBhD-ARIsAGTPcfX-kFiHuXAp8nzr3LrXHOeYS5knM9LTI8SqF212unaso9YtTcedjNYaAsQrEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds#pdp-page-content

Ok hear me out I know that these are Abercrombie but they are amazing and come in like 20 different washes https://www.abercrombie.com/shop/us/p/90s-ultra-high-rise-straight-jeans-47017866?seq=18&source=googleshopping&cmp=PLA:EVG:20:A:USCA:X:GGL:X:SHOP:X:X:X:X:A%26F+Adults_Google_Shopping_SSC_US_Zombie_All+products_PRODUCT_GROUP&gclid=Cj0KCQjwnbmaBhD-ARIsAGTPcfVZrZKpROj_HsBi2JO_FAZGo3LWhVWqaQcbdP4QpemadEBs3FXhlIIaAri_EALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds

Options to go with:
1. https://www.abercrombie.com/shop/us/p/90s-ultra-high-rise-straight-jeans-47017866?seq=18&source=googleshopping&cmp=PLA:EVG:20:A:USCA:X:GGL:X:SHOP:X:X:X:X:A%26F+Adults_Google_Shopping_SSC_US_Zombie_All+products_PRODUCT_GROUP&gclid=Cj0KCQjwnbmaBhD-ARIsAGTPcfVZrZKpROj_HsBi2JO_FAZGo3LWhVWqaQcbdP4QpemadEBs3FXhlIIaAri_EALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds and this https://bananarepublicfactory.gapfactory.com/browse/product.do?pid=402846011&vid=1&tid=bfpl000029&kwid=1&ap=7&gclid=Cj0KCQjwnbmaBhD-ARIsAGTPcfXsnUjucysUyzIT_y06gl2s3EYR87CksUhrhuxGBdda5qj8PySukeUaAm54EALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds#pdp-page-content

2. https://bananarepublic.gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=746496032&vid=1&tid=brpl000047&kwid=1&ap=7&gclid=Cj0KCQjwnbmaBhD-ARIsAGTPcfXREKOJeyVnXxHvT8VptGG4BnCHcaD3sYdqwnmyNMFKkdJk0cMs3ekaAv-kEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds#pdp-page-content with hoop earrings as shown

Or dress like this https://bananarepublic.gap.com/browse/product.do?pid=745471072&vid=1&tid=brpl000047&kwid=1&ap=7&gclid=Cj0KCQjwnbmaBhD-ARIsAGTPcfWUbrWgjTyZWn-v4-I-7CdAvFAkNlRU0Uoqri7oLNB2e3QU2L9YtngaArdZEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds#pdp-page-content

Or jumpsuit (can also be paired with above Moto jacket)
https://www.lulus.com/products/in-the-city-black-surplice-sleeveless-jumpsuit/875282.html

Better recs in this thread than I have seen in the standard B&F threads, good luck OP! I will say Zara has never done this petite any favors though...

Curious to hear some examples of "coded" and "quiet" luxury bags.

OP, why do you care what these former school peers will think about you? You will probably never see them again. Does your life success depend on their opinion? so wear whatever you want to wear, and if conversation gets unpleasant or boring or if you do not like something, just say good bye and leave.

Anonymous wrote:Bonus points if it hides a hypothetical extra 19 pounds one hasn't been able to shake since covid, a lot on a petite hourglass frame.

I'm petite with an hourglass figure. From my closet, I'd wear ankle-length washed black jeans (Madewell) to wear with a silk shirt or my cashmere v-neck sweater (wear a little black tank under ether one to show just a tad). Black suede flats or maybe ankle boots with a little heel. Gold hoops and your favorite necklace. BTW, good luck on losing the Covid weight. I did that and it has made a big difference for me, both in terms of how I look and feel.

Switching over from fashion advice to life advice -- I'm glad to hear you're in a good place, OP, but, that said, if I were you, I'd bow out. I've been to those HS reunions where I've had to confront the the jerks, and, sure, it was a nice feeling to realize that I'd left that chapter in my life far behind, but, I still didn't want to spend the night catching up with those people. I mean, I hope they also have left that chapter in their lives behind and become better people, but honestly, life is too short to waste on them when there are people I like and love much more and would rather spend time with.

Jeans, crisp white shirt, jewelry. Black waterfall neck silk shirt for DDD.

Being discussed in another thread - silk midi skirt (with side slit if you like your legs) and loose/slightly cropped sweater. You don't need to dress like you just got back from apple picking if you're not going apple picking; wtf.

Just wear something that looks good on your body type.

Coated or vegan leather jeans or trousers in a cut that is flattering for you. A slim, and well fitting, top -- e.g., a lightweight cashmere sweater. High quality simple boots and high quality crossbody bag. Simple, dainty gold jewelry.

I think monochromatic outfits look sophisticated and effortlessly cool -- maybe the above all in creams, or blacks, or even chocolate browns.

Could add a blazer too.

How do these people even know each other? Did you all go to high school together?

Get a blow out. Wear polished clothes you're comfortable and confident in. Ask them lots of questions about themselves. Be conversationally and karmically generous.

I'd probably wear my fav jeans, a lightweight sweater, a vintage hermes scarf, and cute croc boots.

You got this!

Anonymous wrote:This is op. I wear a lot of dresses but I think I want pants for this. My friend is coming from apple picking and will be wearing jeans.

I'm not cancelling. I'm honestly in a good place and the middle school bully doesn't have power over me anymore. Okay, I guess I wouldn't think much about what to wear of that was 100% true, but I'm not going to let that stop me. I just want my outsides to reflect my inner confidence. I've focused mostly on work clothes so don't have much for going out that fits well right now.

I would do wide-leg or straight-leg jeans, chunky black leather booties, a bodysuit or slightly cropped top, and an oversized blazer (or shacket maybe, if they are coming from apple picking and will be more casual?) on top.

Anonymous wrote:Jeans. White button down top. Casual jacket (over the shoulders.) Coded luxury bag (that you already own or borrow from someone). For the love of god everyone stop wearing those short booties they cut you off at the leg and make you look like elves.

Ugh.

for your monthly catch up session and she asks if it's okay if she brings along a couple other people who are just in town for a couple days and you say "sure, the more the merrier!" but then you find out that couple other people are none other than the girl who tortured you for being uncool in middle school and the guy who turned you down for a Sadie Hawkins dance in ninth grade...what do you wear?

Well, I wouldn't go if a person who "tortured me" in middle school were going. And I also wouldn't feel either way about a person who turned me down for a dance invite in 9th grade - he wasn't obligated to say yes, any more than a female invitee would have been, and it was many years ago.

But, if I were going for drinks with a friend and wanted to look nice, I would wear a nice pair of straight leg jeans, a flowy top, and ballet flats or low boots.