Anonymous
Post 08/27/2022 13:30     Subject: 3rd kid at 43.
Anonymous wrote:I just can't help but look around the dinner table thinking ... we're not all here yet.

If that makes ANY sense at all.


That's beautiful.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2022 12:22     Subject: 3rd kid at 43.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I had a surprise at age 44. It’s been great. DH and I laugh that he keeps us young (and it truly seems to be the case). No issues with the pg or after. Although I was shocked when I found out we now can’t imagine life without him.


There are no surprise preganancies.

Who made you Merriam-Webster? No one else here is having trouble understanding what this thread means by “surprise” pregnancy. You don’t get to make up definitions. Move on.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2022 12:15     Subject: 3rd kid at 43.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I had a surprise at age 44. It’s been great. DH and I laugh that he keeps us young (and it truly seems to be the case). No issues with the pg or after. Although I was shocked when I found out we now can’t imagine life without him.


There are no surprise preganancies.

You can get pregnant while on birth control.


Was the pp who had this “surprise pregnancy” on the pill ? No, she was not. No birth control methods.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2022 12:13     Subject: 3rd kid at 43.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I had a surprise at age 44. It’s been great. DH and I laugh that he keeps us young (and it truly seems to be the case). No issues with the pg or after. Although I was shocked when I found out we now can’t imagine life without him.


There are no surprise preganancies.


What does this mean? DH had a vasectomy but I know the tube can sometimes (super rare) grow back. So if I got pregnant, would that not be a surprise pregnancy?


True- I know someone who got pregnant with an IUD- they miscarried at 10 weeks but it is still possible to have good birth control methods in place and still get pregnant.


It’s a lot more rare than people make it sound. Forgetting to take your pill on time a few days and not using other protection is not a surprise pregnancy. Using pull and pray is not a surprise pregnancy.


You are correct - however - when someone says there are NO surprise pregnancies that isn’t a totally fair statement, and it’s not true.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2022 11:16     Subject: Re:3rd kid at 43.
I had a baby at 40 and found it easy at the beginning. But DS turned out to have special needs, and at 61 it is not easy. And there is no end in sight.

You need to think long term.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2022 11:13     Subject: 3rd kid at 43.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:FWIW, my practice says no kids after 40


My law practice forbids male associates from having kids after 40.


Why not female associates? I do have to ask how is this legal.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2022 11:10     Subject: 3rd kid at 43.
It's incredibly selfish to have a child that old. My mother had me when she was 40 and she died when I was four. Maybe you won't be diagnosed with breast cancer when this child is two but maybe you will and leave a four year old motherless. Get a puppy.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2022 11:04     Subject: 3rd kid at 43.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I had a surprise at age 44. It’s been great. DH and I laugh that he keeps us young (and it truly seems to be the case). No issues with the pg or after. Although I was shocked when I found out we now can’t imagine life without him.


There are no surprise preganancies.


What does this mean? DH had a vasectomy but I know the tube can sometimes (super rare) grow back. So if I got pregnant, would that not be a surprise pregnancy?


True- I know someone who got pregnant with an IUD- they miscarried at 10 weeks but it is still possible to have good birth control methods in place and still get pregnant.


It’s a lot more rare than people make it sound. Forgetting to take your pill on time a few days and not using other protection is not a surprise pregnancy. Using pull and pray is not a surprise pregnancy.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2022 10:22     Subject: 3rd kid at 43.
Anonymous wrote:FWIW, my practice says no kids after 40


My law practice forbids male associates from having kids after 40.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2022 10:15     Subject: 3rd kid at 43.
I'd you need to discuss with spouse what the plan would be should you find out you will be having a significantly impaired SN child during the pregnancy, what you would do, and the impact to your family unit and existing children this would have.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2022 10:15     Subject: Re:3rd kid at 43.
I find the sibling bond is stronger with just two than with three, especially if the three are spaced far apart. How it will affect the family dynamic depends on the ages of the other two.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2022 10:10     Subject: 3rd kid at 43.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My neighbor had a child at 46 - her first. So, she's 54 with a 2nd grader and will be 64 when that child is a senior in high school. While they are happy, those numbers would make me think hard about the long-term implications of your deicsion to have a baby at 43.

This. My dad was dead at 67


This would be my concern as well. I think a baby at 43 seems doable enough, but age catches up to all of us.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2022 10:03     Subject: 3rd kid at 43.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I had a surprise at age 44. It’s been great. DH and I laugh that he keeps us young (and it truly seems to be the case). No issues with the pg or after. Although I was shocked when I found out we now can’t imagine life without him.


There are no surprise preganancies.

You can get pregnant while on birth control.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2022 09:56     Subject: 3rd kid at 43.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I had a surprise at age 44. It’s been great. DH and I laugh that he keeps us young (and it truly seems to be the case). No issues with the pg or after. Although I was shocked when I found out we now can’t imagine life without him.


There are no surprise preganancies.


What does this mean? DH had a vasectomy but I know the tube can sometimes (super rare) grow back. So if I got pregnant, would that not be a surprise pregnancy?


True- I know someone who got pregnant with an IUD- they miscarried at 10 weeks but it is still possible to have good birth control methods in place and still get pregnant.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2022 09:54     Subject: 3rd kid at 43.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I had a surprise at age 44. It’s been great. DH and I laugh that he keeps us young (and it truly seems to be the case). No issues with the pg or after. Although I was shocked when I found out we now can’t imagine life without him.


There are no surprise preganancies.


What does this mean? DH had a vasectomy but I know the tube can sometimes (super rare) grow back. So if I got pregnant, would that not be a surprise pregnancy?