Anonymous wrote:Can OP move to Virginia then divorce?

Sure. But you have to be a resident of the state for six months. However I think op in her spouse would both have to move to Virginia to make this work

Can OP move to Virginia then divorce?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sure, see Kevin Federline.

That was child support

Because they were only married for 2 years. 20 years has far different calculations.

Ask Britney Spears, Kelly Clarkson, Halle Berry and Mary J Blige.

https://www.washingtonian.com/2021/12/03/more-and-more-women-are-paying-alimony-to-failure-to-launch-ex-husbands-and-theyre-really-really-not-happy-about-it/

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I knew someone who had to pay alimony to her no-account DH. He quit his job, it was supposed to be a temporary thing, but he never tried to find another job. Then he filed for divorce, and demanded alimony. He got it.

Did they have children? Did he take care of them?

He unilaterally decided to be a SAHF without wife's agreement, so yes, there were kids. Their kid was friends with my kid.

Anonymous wrote:So if you started your business BEFORE you married, would the outcome be the same ... your spouse still gets half?

No, not the same. OP needs to see an attorney.

Anonymous wrote:In the state of Virginia if you can prove adultery he will not get alimony. He will get half the marital assets though.

Nobody cares, including judges.

In the state of Virginia if you can prove adultery he will not get alimony. He will get half the marital assets though.

Yes.

I have to pay my husband alimony. It sucks. We are in Virginia. I make ~3X what he does (150K vs 450K). He had been under-employed for years (like part-time <$50K). We went through mediation. It is possible I might not have had to pay, but my lawyer and the mediator advised I might be better off to negotiate a smaller amount of alimony over a set number of years instead of taking my chances in court.

Don’t know the laws in Maryland, but it may help if you can get proof of the adultery. In Virginia, that can mean no alimony for the adulterer. But DO NOT have sex with him. That can be seen as condoning the affair.

The 20 years may also be a factor. In Virginia, 20 years can mean “lifetime” alimony (until retirement, usually). But again, proof of adultery could help.

Do not let on you are considering divorce. See at least 3 lawyers. If you can mediate, you will have more flexibility. You might consider options like paying him alimony for longer to avoid having to give up your business. If you go to court, there is very little flexibility. They split things down the middle and there isn’t horse trading like there can be in mediation. And you will save tens or even hundreds of thousands of dollars to not have to go to court and not have to hire expert witnesses.

Be smart and start making spreadsheets of worst case and your potential legal fees. They figure out scenarios you could offer up or live with that leave you with more money in your pocket.

Yes, my ex asked for it. It was denied though because we’d only been married 2 years.

Anonymous wrote:I knew someone who had to pay alimony to her no-account DH. He quit his job, it was supposed to be a temporary thing, but he never tried to find another job. Then he filed for divorce, and demanded alimony. He got it.

There was a thread on mommd a long time ago where she ended up divorcing her alcoholic husband after putting him through rehab. She ended up paying alimony for at least a few years.

https://mommd.com/forums/topic/sigh-long-late-night-rant/

Anonymous wrote:I knew someone who had to pay alimony to her no-account DH. He quit his job, it was supposed to be a temporary thing, but he never tried to find another job. Then he filed for divorce, and demanded alimony. He got it.

Did they have children? Did he take care of them?

I think if you hire a very aggressive lawyer and put up a fight you will not likely pay much for very long. Now child support is a different thing. How old are your kids?

You will have to pay very little in alimony. My MIL barely worked, was married to my FIL for decades, and my FIL made 1+ million every year in earned income, working for a huge company. Got his mistress pregnant and my MIL received minimum alimony for a short period of time, as the judge expected her to be on her feet financially. My FIL moved a lot of assets to the mistress and child, and my MIL was not able to recover those. They are in MD. California is a different animal.