Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

I was planning to wear something that says "formal tea/garden party".

I have this already: https://us.dolcegabbana.com/fashion/women/clothing/dresses/abito-multicolor-158052145310294.html?keeplocale=true&Country=US

but I can find something longer and maybe a tad fancier. I just don't want to wear a ballgown to a farm in the morning

Beautiful but only an idiot would pay $2000+ for a dress to wear to a barn wedding!

Lovely.

I posted that I already own the D and G dress. Didn’t buy it for the wedding. But by all means, don’t miss an opportunity to be rude.

NP. So, you said earlier that you have the whole gamut in your closet already. Do you have any long-but-kinda-casual dresses, like people are suggesting? What are you leaning toward? Curious to see links/pics to what else you like. I personally could never afford a $2k dress, but it is cute, so let me live vicariously through you!

The fact that OP has pointedly ignored people’s helpful suggestions shows me that she just wanted to show off her $2K dress, and she’s miffed that more people didn’t just fawn all over it. It’s pretty, but it’s nowhere near formal enough to cover the bases if other people are dressed up.

Anonymous wrote:Why can’t you or DH call someone, anyone else, who is attending the wedding? Don’t make it some big deal, just ask, “We’re unsure what to wear—may I ask what you are wearing?”

This. Just ask.

Why can’t you or DH call someone, anyone else, who is attending the wedding? Don’t make it some big deal, just ask, “We’re unsure what to wear—may I ask what you are wearing?”

What is your DH wearing?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this weird? I have been to many black and white tie events and never once have I been invited to something that says "white tie" and takes place at 11 am. Do I trust that they want us in white tie and wear a ballgown before noon or should I maybe do a cocktail dress.

For reference: it is a wedding, venue is a farm and it will be outdoor brunch reception.

Oh my goodness. These people sound very confused.

White tie is appropriate for 12:00 noon and 8:00 pm, or later. Anything else is incorrect. And at farm with an outdoor brunch reception? Please tell us you're joking.

They are my husband's relatives so I don't feel comfortable calling for clarification. Luckily we will be staying down the street in a hotel. I can pack white tie appropriate clothes for both my husband and myself. Worst case is I'll wear a formal garden party outfit, if I get there and people are truly wearing white tie, I can dash back to the hotel and change.

Would this bother you if you were the couple? I just don't want to embarrass myself if I show up under dressed.

I don't understand why you'd bring multiple dresses and plan to potentially dash back and forth between the hotel and venue to change (??) vs. reaching out to find out more information and clarify the couple's intentions (or at least aligning with other attendees on what they are wearing). Just don't be condescending in your inquiry or like you know better than them how things are "done."

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

I was planning to wear something that says "formal tea/garden party".

I have this already: https://us.dolcegabbana.com/fashion/women/clothing/dresses/abito-multicolor-158052145310294.html?keeplocale=true&Country=US

but I can find something longer and maybe a tad fancier. I just don't want to wear a ballgown to a farm in the morning

Beautiful but only an idiot would pay $2000+ for a dress to wear to a barn wedding!

Sounds like OP has both $ and good taste. I'd love to own both the dress and the model's figure.

Anonymous wrote:To the OP : Do you know anyone else invited to the wedding? They might have secured more information regarding the dress code.

Good idea!

To the OP : Do you know anyone else invited to the wedding? They might have secured more information regarding the dress code.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

I was planning to wear something that says "formal tea/garden party".

I have this already: https://us.dolcegabbana.com/fashion/women/clothing/dresses/abito-multicolor-158052145310294.html?keeplocale=true&Country=US

but I can find something longer and maybe a tad fancier. I just don't want to wear a ballgown to a farm in the morning

Beautiful but only an idiot would pay $2000+ for a dress to wear to a barn wedding!

Lovely.

I posted that I already own the D and G dress. Didn’t buy it for the wedding. But by all means, don’t miss an opportunity to be rude.

NP. So, you said earlier that you have the whole gamut in your closet already. Do you have any long-but-kinda-casual dresses, like people are suggesting? What are you leaning toward? Curious to see links/pics to what else you like. I personally could never afford a $2k dress, but it is cute, so let me live vicariously through you!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

I was planning to wear something that says "formal tea/garden party".

I have this already: https://us.dolcegabbana.com/fashion/women/clothing/dresses/abito-multicolor-158052145310294.html?keeplocale=true&Country=US

but I can find something longer and maybe a tad fancier. I just don't want to wear a ballgown to a farm in the morning

Beautiful but only an idiot would pay $2000+ for a dress to wear to a barn wedding!

Lovely.

I posted that I already own the D and G dress. Didn’t buy it for the wedding. But by all means, don’t miss an opportunity to be rude.

Being on a farm means nothing. I went to a $$$$$ wedding recently at a “farm” that is also a Michelin starred restaurant. The D&G dress looks perfect to me OP.

Really, OP, I think it's best to contact the hosts and ask. It doesn't matter that they're not close relatives. They've probably received multiple questions about the dress code by now. You won't be the only one!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They clearly have no clue what they are asking. Wear a pretty, summery dress and be done with it. Maybe a long dress because that kind of checks the formality box if people are dressed up, but you can find something light and comfortable.

https://www.nordstrom.com/s/eliza-j-floral-flutter-sleeve-dress/5900351?origin=keywordsearch-personalizedsort&breadcrumb=Home%2FAll%20Results&color=338

Something like this would be perfect.

That is ugly and frumpy.

Agree. It looks like a nightgown. Just find a nice sundress and a wide brim hat and sandals.

A wide brim hat?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They clearly have no clue what they are asking. Wear a pretty, summery dress and be done with it. Maybe a long dress because that kind of checks the formality box if people are dressed up, but you can find something light and comfortable.

https://www.nordstrom.com/s/eliza-j-floral-flutter-sleeve-dress/5900351?origin=keywordsearch-personalizedsort&breadcrumb=Home%2FAll%20Results&color=338

Something like this would be perfect.

That is ugly and frumpy.

Maybe on your body.

lol I was just reading the thread about people being mean.
Did you design the dress? Why the nastiness? I'm allowed to not like it.

NP… you were the first to say the dress is ugly and frumpy.

Not liking some random dress is not the same thing as insulting another person here. I would never do that.

Another NP. Insulting someone else’s idea and taste while providing no suggestions of your own is pretty small of you. And for you to then try to say someone else is being mean is absurd. Don’t dish it out if you can’t take it.

Well, I have no idea what to suggest one wear to a "white tie" wedding at 11 AM on a farm because it doesn't make any sense, something upon which we all agree.

I think the long dress suggestion is a great one, because long offers a degree of formality that will make OP fit in if people are dressed up, but you can easily find a comfortable long dress—more like just a church dress or a garden party dress—that isn’t beaded, made of silk, over-the-top in case most people are dressed down. I like the blue dress but I agree with others that unless you’re willing to post a few options, you shouldn’t be rude about the suggestions someone else made.

OP, it’s obvious the hosts do not understand what white tie means. It is totally ok for your husband to reach out and clarify.