Anonymous wrote:Teaching my kids a second language. I really thought I’d be able to teach my kids French since I was a French major in college and lived in France - but it’s just too much work!!

Don’t worry about this, they will learn in school and if they are motivated they will pick it up quickly.

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Teaching my kids a second language. I really thought I’d be able to teach my kids French since I was a French major in college and lived in France - but it’s just too much work!!

+1 German speaker here (as a second language -- fluent but not native). It's especially discouraging when your kid rebels against the second language. I've mostly given up.

+2 I was so optimistic about teaching my kids my hard one second language when I was first pregnant. I was so naive. I takes SO MUCH work and I am not remotely fluent enough for that.

Also not modeling good screen habits.

+3 My kids understand my native language but cannot speak it. Seeing other kids speak my language makes me wish mine could do it too. I've given up pretty much since they rebel.

Add to this:
- Not strict when they sneakily watch TV in the basement
- Not reading to them when they were younger (but they like reading now, no thanks to me)
- No punishments for refusing to do chores, or refusing to cleanup or make the bed. I try punishing them by taking away TV time, but they sneakily do it anyways, and it leads to meltdowns so I have given up. I cannot deal with meltdowns and rather have the messy house and unmade beds.
- Way too many toys that never get used
- Not playing outside much with them

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Anonymous wrote:I don't follow all rules, if they don't work for us. People here are horrified by that, but I don't think it's a big deal. I teach my kids to think critically. For example: there is no eating or drinking on mass transit. But years ago my DD was assigned in the lottery to an elementary school that required us to leave home at 7am to get to her school on time. Not a morning girl, I got her up as late as possible which meant she ate breakfast on the train. Never foods that created crumbs, and she never left trash on the train. So no big deal. People here were HORRIFIED that I wasn't teaching her to follow all rules.

This explains why so many people are so disrespectful and entitled. Unlike PP, I don’t think this leads to violent crime, but I do think it is creating lots of rude people who think they can do whatever they want and feel that they shouldn’t be expected to follow rules they don’t agree with. There has been a tremendous loss of basic common courtesies over the last few years.

+1

Teaching her to break the rules that are not convenient for her is not teaching her to think critically. We can all "think critically" to decide which rules we don't like and will not follow, regardless of how it affects the people around us.

Explain how a kid eating on a train without making any mess, affects people around her. Especially when at least a third of them are sipping Starbucks, eating an RX bar or an apple, etc.

I’m betting you are white. You are teaching her she lives in a world where the rules don’t actually apply to her and she can smile sweetly and get out of trouble. Do you want everyone eating however they want on the metro? Or just your daughter under circumstances you’ve deemed acceptable while others should still follow the rules? It must be nice to believe you don’t need to fear getting in trouble for breaking rules while also still wanting those rules generally upheld against others. You’re a clown raising an a-hole

+1

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Anonymous wrote:My 7 year old has “his own phone” (really an old iPhone that he just uses to play games and watch YouTube, it doesn’t have a separate data connection and he can’t call or text on it) and this has been going on for about 2 years now.

Lol, you think the fact that he can’t call or text on it mitigates the fact that he has unlimited access to games and YouTube?

Quit ruining the game.

Just love them….things will work out.

Anonymous wrote:My high school/college kids have never been to church or the equivalent. I hear their godlessness is leading to the downfall of society but they both seem to have strong moral compasses and be good people so who knows.

This is probably the least worse way to ruin your kids

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Anonymous wrote:Mine are grown. It's too late. They are ruint.

You are such a slacker. I finished ruining mine by the time they were like 3. Waiting till they are adults is just helicopter parenting.

You’re my hero! 😂

My high school/college kids have never been to church or the equivalent. I hear their godlessness is leading to the downfall of society but they both seem to have strong moral compasses and be good people so who knows.

Anonymous wrote:My 7 year old has “his own phone” (really an old iPhone that he just uses to play games and watch YouTube, it doesn’t have a separate data connection and he can’t call or text on it) and this has been going on for about 2 years now.

Lol, you think the fact that he can’t call or text on it mitigates the fact that he has unlimited access to games and YouTube?

My 7 year old has “his own phone” (really an old iPhone that he just uses to play games and watch YouTube, it doesn’t have a separate data connection and he can’t call or text on it) and this has been going on for about 2 years now.

I gave my kids iPhones in 4th grade.

It actually makes me kind of sick to read that. At least they can only use them for phone calls (and in the 10-year old's case, only FaceTime calls because he doesn't have a wireless plan), texting, audible, kindle, wikipedia, and subway surfers.

Anonymous wrote:Too much screen time
Not making them do enough chores

this

Anonymous wrote:Mine are grown. It's too late. They are ruint.

You are such a slacker. I finished ruining mine by the time they were like 3. Waiting till they are adults is just helicopter parenting.

Anonymous wrote:My oldest just graduated from college. My second oldest has just finished her sophomore year.

I never set my foot on either campuses. Just didn't happen, timing wasn't right, etc. They are on their own.

That actually really isn’t ok. Not in a tongue in cheek way. You should go visit the younger one’s college while she’s still there.

I came here to say I buy my kid too many toys but I also want to add that the mom who actively teaches her daughter to ignore rules that are inconvenient for her is the worst