I think someone asking about my vacation plans is intrusive.

Anonymous wrote:I’ve noticed that many of my friends and acquaintances make it a point to note where they are going on vacation each spring break and summer. I hear Aruba, Mexico, Turks and Caicos, Hawaii, Europe, etc.

When they ask me where I’m going and I say “oh probably a weekend at the beach,” there’s almost a look of disappointment/judgement.

Are vacations the ultimate status symbol around here? Is it a way to one up people?

Do the Russians pay more for class warfare trolling, or do the Chinese? Do you get paid solely by the thread started, or partly by replies?

Do you think your threads will help China take over Taiwan, or is this more a long-term effort?

Anonymous wrote:I’ve noticed that many of my friends and acquaintances make it a point to note where they are going on vacation each spring break and summer. I hear Aruba, Mexico, Turks and Caicos, Hawaii, Europe, etc.

When they ask me where I’m going and I say “oh probably a weekend at the beach,” there’s almost a look of disappointment/judgement.

Are vacations the ultimate status symbol around here? Is it a way to one up people?

It depends on who your friends are. I am not friends with people who look down on my vacation choices.

OP I think I can visualize the type of person you are talking about but I don’t think it’s a UMC thing, I think it’s an insecure thing. People who name drop brands, make sure people around them know they went to the most expensive X place, etc are very insecure. There’s a difference btw saying “oh I’m going to Aspen/Caribbean/Europe/whatever for vacation” and “I’m staying in the most exclusive resort, I’m flying first class, I’m spending X amount.” The former is just conversation and not at all bragging. The latter is classless and reeks of desperation to fit in.

Anonymous wrote:IME they just go on more vacations so it comes up naturally. I have never thought someone was bragging or trying to one up me by discussing their trips.

Same. The more $$$ one has- the more vacations one can afford at nice places. It is natural to be jealous OP.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think so. My friends are all telling me about their plans to go to Deep Creek, Outer Banks and Rehobeth. Us MC people apparently name drop too, the names are just less exciting

Are you saying outer banks and Rehoboth are worthy of name dropping?

I don’t think so. My friends are all telling me about their plans to go to Deep Creek, Outer Banks and Rehobeth. Us MC people apparently name drop too, the names are just less exciting

Anonymous wrote:You’re just jealous. Get over it.

I love how the default on DCUM for any criticism or observation of how UMC people act is automatically labeled jealousy.

OP, I'm guessing you don't like to travel as much as your friends. And that's ok, many people don't. And many people put their money into other things, not travel. You are probably like that.

They probably aren't bragging. They are excited. It's an important experience for them. It's a good conversation starter too, to talk about places/experiences people have in common. It matters to them. Other things matter to you.

Anonymous wrote:You’re not crazy to feel this way. I’ve traveled a lot with an annual travel budget of at least 75k. Sometimes more.

I loath running into other Americans on trips because at least 75% just want to get into a pissing contest. One trick is to tell them it’s my first trip. Then I’m just an idiot to them, they “win” and they go away. There are a few nice travelers but they are sadly the exception.

As far as I’m concerned, your instincts aren’t wrong. Thanks to social media, travel is now the ultimate form of conspicuous consumption.

+100. Bragging is rude no matter the topic. It’s also just so needy and desperate feeling. “A Lion will never have to tell you it’s a Lion.”

Most people I've met here love to travel. I do to and I like to talk about it, especially itineraries and cool places to see. I have a coworker who loves luxury travel and I like hearing about his trips, even though I would never spend money like that on a hotel or first class seat. I still enjoy it and he seems to really enjoy sharing the details of his travels and he gives me tips on maximizing credit card points.

But my DH has a friend who falls into the bragging category. This person has rich in-laws who pay for him and his wife to take luxury vacations or to take months off of work to travel, among other things (like buying them a house!). He likes to tell details about how amazing the hotel was, the first class seat, how they mentioned seeing some jewelry in shop window to the in-laws and the MIL tracked it down and gave it as a birthday gift. Blech! It annoys me so much that I can't spend time with them.

I think people are just happy to get away to different locales and want to share their enthusiasm.

Anonymous wrote:You’re not crazy to feel this way. I’ve traveled a lot with an annual travel budget of at least 75k. Sometimes more.

I loath running into other Americans on trips because at least 75% just want to get into a pissing contest. One trick is to tell them it’s my first trip. Then I’m just an idiot to them, they “win” and they go away. There are a few nice travelers but they are sadly the exception.

As far as I’m concerned, your instincts aren’t wrong. Thanks to social media, travel is now the ultimate form of conspicuous consumption.

+ 1

It is not only Americans. You should hear Indians (especially Gujaratis) talking about their travels and the places they have been. And it is not even the UMC crowd that is doing the pissing contest.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My family is UMC but I suffer from anxiety so traveling isn't my thing. Since I think I can look at this objectively, I don't see people sharing their travels as bragging moreso that it's a lot of people's hobbies. As most people get into their mid-40s and up, there aren't a ton of hobbies that can give people joy like travelling - especially those who like to plan their trips themselves. So it can be all-consuming and they can talk about it a lot but it's not usually a look at how much money I spent, but look at how much time and effort I spent and it's fun for them to share. I still like to listen even though I have no desire to travel

The best travel experiences I had were in my 20s when I was backpacking and prepared to slum it. Now everything has to be organized in advance, there's little flexibility to change the itinerary and my spouse likes a certain standard of accommodation. It's not the same experience that I had in the past where I met locals and other travelers, and made things up as I went along.

My experience too! I loved backpacking alone or with my bff in my 20s. Now I book things 6 months in advance and have to make sure I find a place nice enough to my DH, and with a pool for my kid. I have to carefully make sure everything is comfortable enough, like no crappy flights and no long bus rides. It occupies more of my mental space. It’s fancier and more expensive. If you make the mistake of asking me about summer plans at soccer practice, I might just tell you all about it.

Anonymous wrote:My family is UMC but I suffer from anxiety so traveling isn't my thing. Since I think I can look at this objectively, I don't see people sharing their travels as bragging moreso that it's a lot of people's hobbies. As most people get into their mid-40s and up, there aren't a ton of hobbies that can give people joy like travelling - especially those who like to plan their trips themselves. So it can be all-consuming and they can talk about it a lot but it's not usually a look at how much money I spent, but look at how much time and effort I spent and it's fun for them to share. I still like to listen even though I have no desire to travel

The best travel experiences I had were in my 20s when I was backpacking and prepared to slum it. Now everything has to be organized in advance, there's little flexibility to change the itinerary and my spouse likes a certain standard of accommodation. It's not the same experience that I had in the past where I met locals and other travelers, and made things up as I went along.