No gifts! If your child is very close to the birthday kid and really wants to give them a gift, do it another time. I think that makes it more fun anyway because there’s nothing to stop the kid from opening it immediately and all of the attention at that moment can be on a single gift instead of a huge pile of stuff plus party craziness.

Anonymous wrote:I have zero preferences as a guest. Either is totally fine.

Being on the receiving end now for several years with kids in late elementary, I would say that 50% of gifts max get used, no matter how well intentioned.

My kids are old enough now that exchanging with close friends is really fun for them, but I'd go back and make those early, all-class parties "no gifts" in a heartbeat.

Same. The kids get a lot of gifts, but they don’t like at least 1/2 of them.

I prefer no gift parties. My kids don’t always know the birthday kid well enough to know what they’d want, so I end up having to guess. There are times when we’ve got 3 parties in one weekend and having to buy and wrap gifts for every party is just another thing that I barely have time to do.

I also prefer no gift parties for my kids. They have so much already, and the party should be about celebrating with friends — not what you get.

Anonymous wrote:No gift. I can’t tell you how many times I have thought hard about a gift and picked out something the kid already had.

(Okay I can tell you, it was three times.)

No gift. I can’t tell you how many times I have thought hard about a gift and picked out something the kid already had.

Gifts. I never know exactly what to do with a no gift party.

Anonymous wrote:I prefer gift parties. Any non-gift parties I end up going back and forth on whether to bring a gift and I show up with nothing and I see a stack of gifts. It's just easier for me to bring something.

Same. I prefer gift parties because then I know that I'll be doing what others are doing. We've been invited to no gift parties and then show up without a gift only to find that most of the other guests have brought gifts. Then my kid is asking why we didn't bring a gift since everyone else did. The last couple of no-gift parties, I took a generic gift that was wrapped, left it in the car and went in. If there were many gifts, then I went and grabbed the gift from the car. If there were fewer gifts, then I left it in the car. It feels like a no-win situation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No gift. We’re in Los Angeles and it must be different here because all the class birthday parties are no gift parties. DS is 4 and has never been to a yes-gifts party.

Well of course nobody brings gifts to a kid celebrating their birthday at SCHOOL with their CLASS. We're talking about a party the parents throw!

Not at school! I meant their parties at the homes or a venue!! I meant friends from my kid’s class.

Sorry for my poor turn of phrase!

Anonymous wrote:No gift parties seem great in theory. But when I abide by the host’s wishes I inevitably feel like the ahole when I show up no gift in hand and there’s a stack of beautifully wrapped and bagged gifts on the console. If you’re the host of a no-gift party, how do you handle gifts? Put them in a closet? Open them during the party? Display them but don’t open them until party is over?

I put them in the closet. I would never display gifts at a no gift party. I rarely even give them to my kids anyway. Just donate them.

No gift parties seem great in theory. But when I abide by the host’s wishes I inevitably feel like the ahole when I show up no gift in hand and there’s a stack of beautifully wrapped and bagged gifts on the console. If you’re the host of a no-gift party, how do you handle gifts? Put them in a closet? Open them during the party? Display them but don’t open them until party is over?

Anonymous wrote:No gift. We’re in Los Angeles and it must be different here because all the class birthday parties are no gift parties. DS is 4 and has never been to a yes-gifts party.

Well of course nobody brings gifts to a kid celebrating their birthday at SCHOOL with their CLASS. We're talking about a party the parents throw!

No gift. We’re in Los Angeles and it must be different here because all the class birthday parties are no gift parties. DS is 4 and has never been to a yes-gifts party.

Anonymous wrote:Seriously people LIKE bringing gifts?!?? No gifts all the way. Too much mental load to shop, wrap and prep everything in advance. I have enough stuff to do and I don't need to get your kid a toy that they may or may not like

I don't, but my kids do. And I'm pretty sure the birthday kids enjoy receiving them, too.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks for the feedback. We will not do a gift registry and it is his whole class plus at his party.

I think we’ll do No Gifts.

Did you have parties growing up? Did your parents tell people not to give gifts. If yes and no than I think you are mean.

OP here. I had gift birthday parties growing up but no more than four parties my entire childhood. A birthday party every year for a child just wasn’t done where I grew up. Always a family party but absolutely not a friend birthday party every year. No one did that.

I am decidedly not mean. We are lucky enough to be from a loving family and can easily afford gifts for our kids.

It is going to be a large no gift party. We decided.

Anonymous wrote:Seriously people LIKE bringing gifts?!?? No gifts all the way. Too much mental load to shop, wrap and prep everything in advance. I have enough stuff to do and I don't need to get your kid a toy that they may or may not like

Yes, I like picking out gifts people will like, and my kids like it too. Sometimes we design our own wrapping paper. I buy fancy wrapping paper people are unlikely to have (mine isn't from Target or Walgreens). Sometimes we wrap gifts in comics from the newspaper. Gifts are fun!