Anonymous
Post 05/06/2022 15:51     Subject: Is it messed up to not save for your kids college even if you can afford it?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I’m saving for my kids college education so they can graduate without any debt; however there will be strings attached. I will only pay for certain degrees, such as Engineering. Maybe premed if they show good promise, but I’d prefer a 4 years and our degree. Grades will need to be good. My kids will need to work summer jobs beginning at 15 and pay me what they can do that they have at least some skin in the game.

If they can’t do the above but still want higher education they can redeem themselves going to community college.


This is awful and your kids will pay in years of therapy for how controlling you are as a parent - only pay for certain degrees like Engineering or premed if promise? Wow.



I see where PP is coming from, although it is controlling. Please read How to Raise an Adult.

My expectation is that when my kids get there they will make the decisions I am happy with without any guidance from me.

"Train up a child in the way (s)he should go: and when (s)he is old, (s)he will not depart from it."


I don't consult the Bible for child or career development advice.

We told our kids that they can study whatever they want and that we will pay for it, provided that we expected them to be self-supporting after graduating. DC majored in philosophy (Class of '19) and is making $142K per year and DC2 majored in math (Class of '21) and is making $102K/year, so we are all good here.
Anonymous
Post 05/06/2022 15:50     Subject: Re:Is it messed up to not save for your kids college even if you can afford it?
OP where would you be without your CS degree?

It's affording you a nice life, yet in the same breath you are saying college degrees are worthless.

I don't know where my DH and I would be without our college degrees, truly.

I agree that college tuition is way too expensive and costs are over inflated. I also agree you CAN be successful without a college degree but what if your children don't want to go to a trade school or other program? What if your kid wants to go to law school or med school and you realize you can't help them at all?

Yes I agree the system is flawed but you singularly not saving money for your kid to stick it to the man isn't going to fix anything.

I think those of us who save just want to give our kids options and don't want to be caught unprepared.
Anonymous
Post 05/06/2022 15:17     Subject: Is it messed up to not save for your kids college even if you can afford it?
Anonymous wrote:Stay away from 529. There are other ways to help your children. Keep your family happy and healthy, invest all the extra you make and college costs shouldn't be a problem. 529 investment choices suck and there are high fees. It's for the company that gets your money, not your kids.


+1 We save and invest as much as we can, but not in a 529. They're pretty terrible investment choices. And our main goals are 1) paid off house, and 2) fully funded retirement. Anything left after than can be for post-secondary education - whether that's trade school or college.
Anonymous
Post 05/06/2022 15:09     Subject: Re:Is it messed up to not save for your kids college even if you can afford it?
Anonymous wrote:I put a small amount into a 529 monthly because my husband is a professor who gets tuition remission for his offspring at any university. But, like, he could die... and the tuition reimbursement only covers the tuition, I believe... and 529s can cover housing and such. So, it's sort of a backup emergency option for us.


Is it really any university? My spouse is a professor and the kids get free tuition there, or there’s a consortium program for tuition exchange, but it’s a limited number of schools, only 4 or 5 kids get it per year, and there has to be a student coming to the professor’s school to make it an even exchange. Also I think it’s taxed.
Anonymous
Post 05/06/2022 14:34     Subject: Is it messed up to not save for your kids college even if you can afford it?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Millennial here, went to a state school in the early 2010's and paid my way through because parents didn't have the money, and I still graduated with 40k in debt which I paid off in 3 years thanks to a decent starting salary (thank you CS degree). Now I make several times more and my wife is pregnant with our first kid, so thinking about college savings, but reading these forums it seems like everyone is obsessed with fully funding their kids college education. Why should I feel obligated to do so when 1) lots of college degrees these days are completely worthless and won't give anywhere close to a good ROI and 2) higher education is in a massive debt fueled bubble and maybe I don't want to help fuel it by paying extremely inflated tuition costs? I have a lot of friends who aren't in a financial position to contribute to 529's even if they wanted to, yet they still have kids. Honestly I think there's too much emphasis on saving for college given that so many degrees are worthless and the bubble just keeps expanding with all this free government money flowing into higher ed. Not every person should even go to college.

Why are you even having this child?


My question as well.
Anonymous
Post 05/06/2022 13:20     Subject: Re:Is it messed up to not save for your kids college even if you can afford it?
Anonymous wrote:I put a small amount into a 529 monthly because my husband is a professor who gets tuition remission for his offspring at any university. But, like, he could die... and the tuition reimbursement only covers the tuition, I believe... and 529s can cover housing and such. So, it's sort of a backup emergency option for us.


How old are your kids? My oldest (15) does not want to go the university where I work, but I'm still hoping she changes her mind. We have not yet discussed how much we have saved with her (around $150k). Have you had that discussion with your kids yet?
Anonymous
Post 05/06/2022 12:27     Subject: Is it messed up to not save for your kids college even if you can afford it?
What else are you going to do with the money? Ultimately, it gives your child choices. Whether he or she chooses to go to college or vocational school, it costs money. If he or she needs extra support or has a medical issue, while the 529 won't directly help that, you can pull it out to pay for their needs. Just because the world may not be where you want it to be, doesn't mean your child has to suffer with student loans or lack of financial support.
That being said, we are only supporting our child to the point of in state tuition. So, there can be limits too.
Anonymous
Post 05/06/2022 12:23     Subject: Is it messed up to not save for your kids college even if you can afford it?
We started saving when the kids were born. It wasn’t enough. In sharp contrast, a Catholic family we know with a dozen or more kids have told all their children that they are on their own at 18. If they are to do , they must figure it out on their own
Anonymous
Post 05/06/2022 12:03     Subject: Re:Is it messed up to not save for your kids college even if you can afford it?
Not really. If you think it’s a waste, that’s your opinion and your decision to save or not.
Anonymous
Post 05/06/2022 12:01     Subject: Is it messed up to not save for your kids college even if you can afford it?
Stay away from 529. There are other ways to help your children. Keep your family happy and healthy, invest all the extra you make and college costs shouldn't be a problem. 529 investment choices suck and there are high fees. It's for the company that gets your money, not your kids.
Anonymous
Post 05/06/2022 12:00     Subject: Is it messed up to not save for your kids college even if you can afford it?
Your baby is just theoretical at this point, OP. Once he/she is here in flesh and blood, and you watch him/her grow from baby, toddler, child, teen then young adult, learning how to eat, walk, talk, tie shoe laces, ride a bike, read, make friends, play sports, and see all sucesses AND failures your child goes through, you are going to want to help your child and provide support as much as you can. This is why we save for college (even though we agree that the currrent high cost of colleges is crazy and unsustainable.)
Anonymous
Post 05/06/2022 11:58     Subject: Is it messed up to not save for your kids college even if you can afford it?
Anonymous wrote:Millennial here, went to a state school in the early 2010's and paid my way through because parents didn't have the money, and I still graduated with 40k in debt which I paid off in 3 years thanks to a decent starting salary (thank you CS degree). Now I make several times more and my wife is pregnant with our first kid, so thinking about college savings, but reading these forums it seems like everyone is obsessed with fully funding their kids college education. Why should I feel obligated to do so when 1) lots of college degrees these days are completely worthless and won't give anywhere close to a good ROI and 2) higher education is in a massive debt fueled bubble and maybe I don't want to help fuel it by paying extremely inflated tuition costs? I have a lot of friends who aren't in a financial position to contribute to 529's even if they wanted to, yet they still have kids. Honestly I think there's too much emphasis on saving for college given that so many degrees are worthless and the bubble just keeps expanding with all this free government money flowing into higher ed. Not every person should even go to college.

Why are you even having this child?
Anonymous
Post 05/06/2022 11:52     Subject: Re:Is it messed up to not save for your kids college even if you can afford it?
I put a small amount into a 529 monthly because my husband is a professor who gets tuition remission for his offspring at any university. But, like, he could die... and the tuition reimbursement only covers the tuition, I believe... and 529s can cover housing and such. So, it's sort of a backup emergency option for us.
Anonymous
Post 05/06/2022 11:46     Subject: Is it messed up to not save for your kids college even if you can afford it?
We saved and glad we did.
My oldest is a Junior - and had a really challenging time the last few years.
The fact that we will not be applying for financial aid puts us in a different pile for admissions as schools need to balance student body.
My DS will at least get a look from admissions for some of the schools on his list. [this is what private college counselor told us]
Anonymous
Post 05/06/2022 11:42     Subject: Re:Is it messed up to not save for your kids college even if you can afford it?
Anonymous wrote:We've always saved only the minimum for tax purposes (4K?) However the grandparents pay for college for mine. I agree that not everyone should go to college.


Ditto.