Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Also, while I value chess dad's advice, there's always stuff left out of the story like their child had a lot of outbursts at this supposedly great charter and they also spent a year at Auburn where their child did not do well at all.
I bring this up to you OP because things don't always go in one direction. With those diagnoses it's sometimes one step forward two steps back. I've been happy to hear chess dad's child is doing well at the mainstream private.
It’s mom not dad this time. DS had a bad 1/2 year in second grade before his ADHD was diagnosed. Also, DS did not get along with his Sp Ed teacher in second grade and she was replaced. So much for out bursts in elementary school. Overall, our charter was great for prek-2 and ok for 3-5.
DS went to Auburn for a year. A huge waste of time and money. He certainly did not learn anything that year and I got more phone calls than I ever did at the charter. DS’s behavior was awful that year too. Terrible fit.
OP here. Where did you go from Auburn? I'm very interested in that because I heard that once the kid is in a SN private like Auburn/KTS, it's relatively hard to transfer him/her to a mainstream private since the mainstream may not want to take a chance on a student from SN private.
We went to Fusion which my DS loved as opposed to Auburn. Fusion was great! We were able to catch DS up in English: vocabulary, grammar and writing. The main reason we hated Auburn was bc the English teacher was illiterate judging by all his grammatical errors on progress reports. He also assigned Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein to 6 graders![]()
Back on point. Then Fusion went to virtual learning for 1/2 the year. After Fusion, I hired private tutors for a year to fill out DS’s holes in English and Math. DS did great at Fusion, all As, great recommendations from his English, Math, Science and HOS which is why DS is at the school he is now. Took the SSAT. We applied to a bunch of mainstream private schools and he got into all and goes to his first choice.
COVID was actually great because we had DS all caught up. He is an academic rock star. Excels in his top math class and is an excellent writer. Very self motivated, neat, well organized with good time management.
Thank you so much.
I only remotely heard about Fusion and I thought they are mainly a collection of regional offices providing 1:1 tutors? It is there actually a school, a class and a head of school at each location?
For your DS to reach a point that he “Excels in his top math class and is an excellent writer. Very self motivated, neat, well organized with good time management”, do you think it’s mainly due to the one year at Fusion? Or it’s also related to the years he spend at the charter school?

Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:DS went to Auburn for 6 grade since our charter was prek-5. This was at the advice of our neuropsych - but I think he did not have current info.
My kid has had 1 psycho Ed eval and 2 neuropsych evals. But I think for all the useful info in neuropsych evals, school recommendations tend to be the weakest: it’s hard to keep up with current info…. Something to keep in mind going forward, OP.
An eval from a developmental pediatrician is more like a psycho eval (than a neuropsych eval), right? Should we get a neuropsych eval?
Thanks for any input.
Neuropsych evals are usually done when the child is 7, mainly because they want kids to take the WISC not the WIPPSI. So wait. My DS had the psycho Ed eval at 4 then neuropsych evals at 7 and 10. It’s usually recommended that neuropsych evals are done every 3 years but we didn’t do another at 13, mainly because DS isn’t having any issues and doesn’t need an IEP.
A developmental pediatrician evaluation isn’t a psychoed eval. Our dev ped wanted to see the results of our kid’s psych Ed eval. I would recommend that your child get a psych Ed eval if you want to send her to public school with IEP or you can ask the public school do it as part of the IEP process.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Also, while I value chess dad's advice, there's always stuff left out of the story like their child had a lot of outbursts at this supposedly great charter and they also spent a year at Auburn where their child did not do well at all.
I bring this up to you OP because things don't always go in one direction. With those diagnoses it's sometimes one step forward two steps back. I've been happy to hear chess dad's child is doing well at the mainstream private.
It’s mom not dad this time. DS had a bad 1/2 year in second grade before his ADHD was diagnosed. Also, DS did not get along with his Sp Ed teacher in second grade and she was replaced. So much for out bursts in elementary school. Overall, our charter was great for prek-2 and ok for 3-5.
DS went to Auburn for a year. A huge waste of time and money. He certainly did not learn anything that year and I got more phone calls than I ever did at the charter. DS’s behavior was awful that year too. Terrible fit.
OP here. Where did you go from Auburn? I'm very interested in that because I heard that once the kid is in a SN private like Auburn/KTS, it's relatively hard to transfer him/her to a mainstream private since the mainstream may not want to take a chance on a student from SN private.
We went to Fusion which my DS loved as opposed to Auburn. Fusion was great! We were able to catch DS up in English: vocabulary, grammar and writing. The main reason we hated Auburn was bc the English teacher was illiterate judging by all his grammatical errors on progress reports. He also assigned Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein to 6 graders![]()
Back on point. Then Fusion went to virtual learning for 1/2 the year. After Fusion, I hired private tutors for a year to fill out DS’s holes in English and Math. DS did great at Fusion, all As, great recommendations from his English, Math, Science and HOS which is why DS is at the school he is now. Took the SSAT. We applied to a bunch of mainstream private schools and he got into all and goes to his first choice.
COVID was actually great because we had DS all caught up. He is an academic rock star. Excels in his top math class and is an excellent writer. Very self motivated, neat, well organized with good time management.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:DS went to Auburn for 6 grade since our charter was prek-5. This was at the advice of our neuropsych - but I think he did not have current info.
My kid has had 1 psycho Ed eval and 2 neuropsych evals. But I think for all the useful info in neuropsych evals, school recommendations tend to be the weakest: it’s hard to keep up with current info…. Something to keep in mind going forward, OP.
An eval from a developmental pediatrician is more like a psycho eval (than a neuropsych eval), right? Should we get a neuropsych eval?
Thanks for any input.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Also, while I value chess dad's advice, there's always stuff left out of the story like their child had a lot of outbursts at this supposedly great charter and they also spent a year at Auburn where their child did not do well at all.
I bring this up to you OP because things don't always go in one direction. With those diagnoses it's sometimes one step forward two steps back. I've been happy to hear chess dad's child is doing well at the mainstream private.
It’s mom not dad this time. DS had a bad 1/2 year in second grade before his ADHD was diagnosed. Also, DS did not get along with his Sp Ed teacher in second grade and she was replaced. So much for out bursts in elementary school. Overall, our charter was great for prek-2 and ok for 3-5.
DS went to Auburn for a year. A huge waste of time and money. He certainly did not learn anything that year and I got more phone calls than I ever did at the charter. DS’s behavior was awful that year too. Terrible fit.
OP here. Where did you go from Auburn? I'm very interested in that because I heard that once the kid is in a SN private like Auburn/KTS, it's relatively hard to transfer him/her to a mainstream private since the mainstream may not want to take a chance on a student from SN private.
. Excels in his top math class and is an excellent writer. Very self motivated, neat, well organized with good time management.Anonymous wrote:DS went to Auburn for 6 grade since our charter was prek-5. This was at the advice of our neuropsych - but I think he did not have current info.
My kid has had 1 psycho Ed eval and 2 neuropsych evals. But I think for all the useful info in neuropsych evals, school recommendations tend to be the weakest: it’s hard to keep up with current info…. Something to keep in mind going forward, OP.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Also, while I value chess dad's advice, there's always stuff left out of the story like their child had a lot of outbursts at this supposedly great charter and they also spent a year at Auburn where their child did not do well at all.
I bring this up to you OP because things don't always go in one direction. With those diagnoses it's sometimes one step forward two steps back. I've been happy to hear chess dad's child is doing well at the mainstream private.
It’s mom not dad this time. DS had a bad 1/2 year in second grade before his ADHD was diagnosed. Also, DS did not get along with his Sp Ed teacher in second grade and she was replaced. So much for out bursts in elementary school. Overall, our charter was great for prek-2 and ok for 3-5.
DS went to Auburn for a year. A huge waste of time and money. He certainly did not learn anything that year and I got more phone calls than I ever did at the charter. DS’s behavior was awful that year too. Terrible fit.
Anonymous wrote:Also, while I value chess dad's advice, there's always stuff left out of the story like their child had a lot of outbursts at this supposedly great charter and they also spent a year at Auburn where their child did not do well at all.
I bring this up to you OP because things don't always go in one direction. With those diagnoses it's sometimes one step forward two steps back. I've been happy to hear chess dad's child is doing well at the mainstream private.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It truly depends on your child’s needs. MCPS is huge and has a lot of options. However, the downside is that if your child doesn’t fit into one of their programs, they will still stick them there and just try their best. In addition, it is very impersonal- the people making the placement decisions have often never met your child.
In a smaller district, it is probably more personal but they won’t have the same options.
I did not find this with MCPS. when my son didn’t fit, they developed a program within a program for him. The resources at MCPS are amazing and the commitment to success was evident. Also even though it’s big, the special Ed community at the schools is small and the same people are involved with your child for years. So I didn’t find it impersonal either.
I do think better districts are better equipped to handle special needs. My son got so many more services and opportunities than his cousin who was in a smaller district that had less resources.
Was in a W district and not Autism (the parents of autistic kids do a great job advocating) but we had a horrendous MCPS experience with adhd and dyslexia. I have to say the complete opposite of this PP - horrible teacher culture. Would choose any place over MCPS - literally DCPS has to have been better. Yep
What is W district ... if you don't mind me asking?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I think the top school systems have more of the resources and experience to do SN well. I don’t think a school system that has trouble educationing NT students can do SNs well.
My DS with ASD/ADHD, combined type, attended a DC immersion charter and while they tried their best, it was subpar. The main issue being that while they gave us everything our neuropsych recommended in the IEP, the overall education in English and Math wasn’t great and DS was fully mainstreamed, got As and 5s in PARCC.
Now DS goes to a top mainstream private in MA after catching up and fixing holes in his English and Math when we were homeschooling for a year due to COVID.
I think you should go to the best school system possible. At least there you know the education is good. Why would you expect a school system that doesn’t do education well to be better with SNs?
I agree with you that I'm definitely not considering "bad" or "subpar" school systems. I'm really trying to compare the good one (e.g., Bethesda or Potomac) with the very top one nationwide (Lexington MA, Scarsdale NY or Short Hills NJ). Would the very top ones be too competitive while the good one is the right balance for an ASD + ADHD kid? Any thought is appreciated.
Even more interestingly, you mentioned your DS is doing well in the mainstream private. Can I ask how did you manage that? My DS is currently in a small and warm mainstream private Pre-K class. He is very happy there, although is not gaining too much social skills. The reason we are thinking about leaving is because our developmental pd thinks the mainstream private classroom doesn't really know how to support an ASD + ADHD kid and thus recommends us to add an 1:1 aide for DS in school for a year or so to help improving DS's social skills and self-regulation skills, however the school is not very willing to accommodate the 1:1 aide. That's why we are considering public schools instead. Do you mind talk a little bit, in your opinion, what kind of mainstream private is good for ASD + ADHD kid? Of course maybe your DS is more high functioning than mine currently, so maybe we just need to get our DS some strong support for a year or two before sending him back to another mainstream private ...
My kid is in middle school. At this point he doesn’t need any services, meds or accommodations. DS was diagnosed with ASD/Asperger’s when he was four and ADHD, combined type when he was 7. He was fully mainstreamed with IEP prek-5 at a dual language immersion charter. At this point, I doubt he would get an ADHD diagnosis if he had another neuropsych eval: He has no academic issues, has excellent executive functioning and is a top student. Granted his ADHD was mostly hyperactive not impulsive or inattentive. DS gets along well with peers and has friends.
If your child is happy at his preschool, let him stay there. The one on one aid isn’t going to do much of anything with helping with social skills. I am presuming your child is fine with adults and the issue is with peers. Keep your kid at the school if he is happy!
I am not sure what mainstream private would be the best for your DS. While I complain about my kid’s immersion charter, they were great about providing supports and services through the IEP including OT, pragmatic speech, social skills classes, PT, etc. We only used school provided services except for a few months, 4?, of private OT. I am not sure if these services were helpful to be honest. The most helpful was DS having a wonderful, warm, nurturing SN teachers/case manager in some of those years and OT which taught DS to type on a laptop starting in 2nd grade. School OT also taught him to tie his shoes, buttons, zippers, utensils, etc.
As I said, the education in English especially in writing and Math was poor and DS was in the top reading and math groups throughout elementary school.
Since your DC is little, your main concern should be how much he likes his school and it sounds like he does. I would keep him there and not bother with the 1:1 aid unless the school thinks he needs one.
Really appreciate your inputs. Part of me definitely agree with you (why bother change since DS is happy right now). But … our developmental pd strongly recommend adding 1:1 aide if we stay at the current private, and part of me agree with that. The school is very nice and warm and DS is happy, but there is no SN support: there is no teacher with SN background and no speech and OT therapy integrated in the school day (all we can do is to add some speech and OT therapy after school). As a result, DS’s social & communicative skills as well as self-regulation skills are not getting improved fast enough. Our dev pd recommended either staying at current school but adding an 1:1 aide as well as integrated speech/OT in the classroom, or going to a good public with IEP, or going to an “SN lite” private where at least classroom teachers have SN background (unfortunately “SN lite” privates are very rare and they are all full). At the current school I’m not sure I can be allowed to add the 1:1 aide or classroom speech/OT for DS for long. Yes it’s possible I’m overreacting and DS doesn’t need 1:1 aide at all and he will grow out of all the issues by himself. However I also think early intervention for ASD is important and DS is already entering K so I probably should not do “let’s wait and see” any more. I’m just trying to show you my perspectives. Let me know your thoughts - thanks a million.
On a separate note, what do you think help your DS transitioning from ASD/ADHD to where he is right now? The way I read it, it’s either time (he simply grows out of it) or it’s that wonderful SN teacher? Then we probably should get our DS to a place where he can be supported by some SN educator / teacher?
For K, I would move to a top school system that does inclusion well and get your child an IEP. I would not move him to a SN private or a SN lite private without trying mainstream with IEP first at a good school. Main thing I would look for in a school: warm, nurturing SN teachers in the classroom (co-teaching with the main teacher) especially if you are doing mainstreamed with IEP. Having the SN teacher in the classroom is way better than a 1:1 aide, better for the entire class actually. Smaller class size for inclusive classes. The school should provide OT, speech, etc as pull outs and provide all the services and accommodations at school as part of a regular school day.
Newton, MA is also great like Lexington. You want to go to a school system with sophisticated parents who already did the heavy lifting and got their kids with ASD/ADHD what they needed from their school system: Wealthy school systems are best with this as are progressive Blue states and MA is the bluest.
My kid still has ASD/Asperger’s. It’s not something you outgrow. His grandfather also likely had it and he lived a successful, contented life without a diagnosis or anything so I am not surprised that DS does fine with a diagnosis and aware of his issues. It’s maturity and time that helped a lot as well as “just having the awareness” - DS is very smart, self aware, very self motivated, confident and happy. I personally think happiness in school counts for a lot too. DS was never bullied, had friends and always got along with peers even when he did not always get along with adults.
Good luck!
Many many thanks!
You are welcome. As an example my kid’s kindergarten class had a head teacher, assistant teacher and the SN teacher in a classroom of 17 kids. Better than most private schools in DC
.
This is amazing ... I have to ask: is it common for a mainstream public school to have SN teacher in the classroom? Or this is some sort of specialized program that only exist in the charter school you attended?
Also, the student-teacher ratio is amazing, I have no idea how to find a public elementary with that kind of teacher student ratio ... guess I need to start calling elementary schools nationwide ;P
I don’t either to be honest. Our charter was relatively new and they really emphasize using “best practices” and having a SN teacher as part of an inclusive classroom was “best practice” I was told. Normally the K classes were 18 kids with 2 teachers.
Also, it was a dual language charter where kids entered by lottery when they are 3/4 yrs old. Most parents don’t send their kids to a dual language charter if they are aware that their child has issues. Every parent at the school whose child was diagnosed with a SN found out once they were already at the school so the school tried their best to provide supports and accommodations. My DS with ASD/ADHD qualified for the most supports and services when he was there and he was part of a huge bubble class so the school provided many supports like the SN teacher (who had just graduated from NYU with a masters in Sp Ed and was wonderful!) that wasn’t there previously.
I am not sure if our charter continues this practice.
Anyway, look for schools that does inclusion well by following “best practice”: small class size with a SN teacher in the classroom should be a given especially in early elementary.
Anonymous wrote:Your post seems to be implying that FCPS and MCPS are not among the top school districts in the country. You'd be wrong about that. They are very diverse but the schools you seem to be looking at in places like Potomac or Great Falls/McLean are some of the top in the country and highly competitive with those in Lexington and other places. The average scores for FCPS and MCPS may be lower because there are many lower performing areas but these districts are huge unlike the districts in places like the Mass. burbs.
Anonymous wrote:Also, while I value chess dad's advice, there's always stuff left out of the story like their child had a lot of outbursts at this supposedly great charter and they also spent a year at Auburn where their child did not do well at all.
I bring this up to you OP because things don't always go in one direction. With those diagnoses it's sometimes one step forward two steps back. I've been happy to hear chess dad's child is doing well at the mainstream private.
Anonymous wrote:Reality check.
You are not going to get a 1:1 aide in public school in this area. I don't know about other areas but I imagine it's the same. They won't allow you to pay for your own aide either. The only kids I have known to get one is when they might have feeding or mobility challenges. Sometimes kids in the emotional support programs get a few hours of help during the day to manage big emotions especially if your child is in one of the specialized programs and is mainstreamed for part of the day.
You need a private school that will allow you to pay for your own aide. A number of privates do allow this. It's not widely advertised and they are usually the ones that are PK-3 or PK-1st or for the lower age groups.