Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know this sounds awful - but I am just exhausted.

I have one 2 y/o and work full-time. It is exhausting meeting his needs - it's just constant demands for attention and tantrums. He will ask for food that he likes then immediately hates it when I bring it out. This morning he has pooped x6 and it's like this every morning. We've talked to his pediatrician and she says it's normal. He screams if I suggest trying the potty. Every food that I offer is "yucky", this morning he woke up at 5AM and ran out to his toy room and immediately began and tantrum when he couldn't' find a specific garbage truck toy.

He is just constantly running and bumping into things, he ran into the couch at full-speed. He screams if he sees an ant. He is so high energy and demanding. We take him to the park, zoo, museum, playdates, outside play for hours on end but its NEVER enough - when its time to leave it's just screaming meltdowns. I am embarassed at his behavior and blame myself for how he acts wondering if there's something i'm doing wrong.

My sisters daughter will just sit quietly and play by herself and sit on my sisters lap and read books. My son is just so much, all the time. It has completley turned me off from having another child and i'm considering having my tubes tied to prevent another pregnancy. I feel like my husband and son deserve a more attentive and engaging mother who is willing to play with him for 8+ hours/day and do crafts/art/fun things but the truth is I am TIRED of having my entire day and free time devoted to my son and his ever constant demands.

Everything is just a constant struggle - eating, potty training, getting in or out of the bath, going to sleep, leaving the park or leaving any kind of activity.

I'm 32. I've had a migraine for a week and my husband is very patient, loving and attentive. I am alone with my son today and just hate it. I have tried SSRI's and therapy but found the SSRI's caused weight gain and decreased libido. I'm withdrawing from one SSRI this week. The worst part is I can't have my husband watch him for any period of time without my son screaming MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY, if he gets hurt he refuses to let his Dad comfort him. It's just ... constant. I just always feel like I want to run away or cry. This isn't how I imagined motherhood.

In the teen years, your niece will be a terror and your son will be chill.

Girls are easier to raise as young children than boys.

Boys are easier to raise as teens than girls.

A generalization, yes, but based in some reality.

I’m a OP with a difficult older child with multiple diagnoses and an typical younger child. My kid who needs extra help is a girl and my typical one is a boy. These generalizations are really really not useful and contribute to boys not getting the help they need early enough AND girls being vilified for being active when younger. If you and your child are struggling do NOT assume they will grow out of it and be an easy teen.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know this sounds awful - but I am just exhausted.

I have one 2 y/o and work full-time. It is exhausting meeting his needs - it's just constant demands for attention and tantrums. He will ask for food that he likes then immediately hates it when I bring it out. This morning he has pooped x6 and it's like this every morning. We've talked to his pediatrician and she says it's normal. He screams if I suggest trying the potty. Every food that I offer is "yucky", this morning he woke up at 5AM and ran out to his toy room and immediately began and tantrum when he couldn't' find a specific garbage truck toy.

He is just constantly running and bumping into things, he ran into the couch at full-speed. He screams if he sees an ant. He is so high energy and demanding. We take him to the park, zoo, museum, playdates, outside play for hours on end but its NEVER enough - when its time to leave it's just screaming meltdowns. I am embarassed at his behavior and blame myself for how he acts wondering if there's something i'm doing wrong.

My sisters daughter will just sit quietly and play by herself and sit on my sisters lap and read books. My son is just so much, all the time. It has completley turned me off from having another child and i'm considering having my tubes tied to prevent another pregnancy. I feel like my husband and son deserve a more attentive and engaging mother who is willing to play with him for 8+ hours/day and do crafts/art/fun things but the truth is I am TIRED of having my entire day and free time devoted to my son and his ever constant demands.

Everything is just a constant struggle - eating, potty training, getting in or out of the bath, going to sleep, leaving the park or leaving any kind of activity.

I'm 32. I've had a migraine for a week and my husband is very patient, loving and attentive. I am alone with my son today and just hate it. I have tried SSRI's and therapy but found the SSRI's caused weight gain and decreased libido. I'm withdrawing from one SSRI this week. The worst part is I can't have my husband watch him for any period of time without my son screaming MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY, if he gets hurt he refuses to let his Dad comfort him. It's just ... constant. I just always feel like I want to run away or cry. This isn't how I imagined motherhood.

In the teen years, your niece will be a terror and your son will be chill.

Girls are easier to raise as young children than boys.

Boys are easier to raise as teens than girls.

A generalization, yes, but based in some reality.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Neuropsych eval

He doesn’t need a psychiatrist. He needs a mom who says NO and needs it. The child is simply spoiled and has learned he gets what he wants by screaming and acting like a PIA.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know this sounds awful - but I am just exhausted.

I have one 2 y/o and work full-time. It is exhausting meeting his needs - it's just constant demands for attention and tantrums. He will ask for food that he likes then immediately hates it when I bring it out. This morning he has pooped x6 and it's like this every morning. We've talked to his pediatrician and she says it's normal. He screams if I suggest trying the potty. Every food that I offer is "yucky", this morning he woke up at 5AM and ran out to his toy room and immediately began and tantrum when he couldn't' find a specific garbage truck toy.

He is just constantly running and bumping into things, he ran into the couch at full-speed. He screams if he sees an ant. He is so high energy and demanding. We take him to the park, zoo, museum, playdates, outside play for hours on end but its NEVER enough - when its time to leave it's just screaming meltdowns. I am embarassed at his behavior and blame myself for how he acts wondering if there's something i'm doing wrong.

My sisters daughter will just sit quietly and play by herself and sit on my sisters lap and read books. My son is just so much, all the time. It has completley turned me off from having another child and i'm considering having my tubes tied to prevent another pregnancy. I feel like my husband and son deserve a more attentive and engaging mother who is willing to play with him for 8+ hours/day and do crafts/art/fun things but the truth is I am TIRED of having my entire day and free time devoted to my son and his ever constant demands.

Everything is just a constant struggle - eating, potty training, getting in or out of the bath, going to sleep, leaving the park or leaving any kind of activity.

I'm 32. I've had a migraine for a week and my husband is very patient, loving and attentive. I am alone with my son today and just hate it. I have tried SSRI's and therapy but found the SSRI's caused weight gain and decreased libido. I'm withdrawing from one SSRI this week. The worst part is I can't have my husband watch him for any period of time without my son screaming MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY, if he gets hurt he refuses to let his Dad comfort him. It's just ... constant. I just always feel like I want to run away or cry. This isn't how I imagined motherhood.

In the teen years, your niece will be a terror and your son will be chill.

Girls are easier to raise as young children than boys.

Boys are easier to raise as teens than girls.

A generalization, yes, but based in some reality.

Anonymous wrote:Neuropsych eval

Anonymous wrote:I know this sounds awful - but I am just exhausted.

I have one 2 y/o and work full-time. It is exhausting meeting his needs - it's just constant demands for attention and tantrums. He will ask for food that he likes then immediately hates it when I bring it out. This morning he has pooped x6 and it's like this every morning. We've talked to his pediatrician and she says it's normal. He screams if I suggest trying the potty. Every food that I offer is "yucky", this morning he woke up at 5AM and ran out to his toy room and immediately began and tantrum when he couldn't' find a specific garbage truck toy.

He is just constantly running and bumping into things, he ran into the couch at full-speed. He screams if he sees an ant. He is so high energy and demanding. We take him to the park, zoo, museum, playdates, outside play for hours on end but its NEVER enough - when its time to leave it's just screaming meltdowns. I am embarassed at his behavior and blame myself for how he acts wondering if there's something i'm doing wrong.

My sisters daughter will just sit quietly and play by herself and sit on my sisters lap and read books. My son is just so much, all the time. It has completley turned me off from having another child and i'm considering having my tubes tied to prevent another pregnancy. I feel like my husband and son deserve a more attentive and engaging mother who is willing to play with him for 8+ hours/day and do crafts/art/fun things but the truth is I am TIRED of having my entire day and free time devoted to my son and his ever constant demands.

Everything is just a constant struggle - eating, potty training, getting in or out of the bath, going to sleep, leaving the park or leaving any kind of activity.

I'm 32. I've had a migraine for a week and my husband is very patient, loving and attentive. I am alone with my son today and just hate it. I have tried SSRI's and therapy but found the SSRI's caused weight gain and decreased libido. I'm withdrawing from one SSRI this week. The worst part is I can't have my husband watch him for any period of time without my son screaming MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY, if he gets hurt he refuses to let his Dad comfort him. It's just ... constant. I just always feel like I want to run away or cry. This isn't how I imagined motherhood.

Anonymous wrote:My son when he was 2 was a nightmare. My friends (who all had daughters) would go to lunch and their girls would sit there quietly and behave themselves. My son would run out into the street if I wasn't watching him with an eagle eye. Boys are tough. The first thing I learned - my son is now 17 - is that my son needs a run every single day. Like to the point of exhaustion. We lived overseas in a big city where the parks were not so safe and it was exhausting trying to keep him from falling off something. But here you have great parks and lots of places to run.

My suggestion is to get him a small bike or tricycle and take him to the park as often as possible. First thing on a sunday morning, take him to the track and have him follow you around. Something, anything.

The second thing I learned is that boys are much easier than girls after about 4 years old. My friend's girls are difficult now! So much drama. My son still just needs exercise and he is easy. Without exercise, a bit of a nightmare (think pandemic!) but otherwise, no drama.

The third thing I learned is find him an activity he enjoys - I put my son in so many classes, some he liked, some he didn't - but at least it gave us a break. And he found a sport he loves and excels in.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here -

He has always been this way. Let me add he is a very loving boy which is part of why I feel so guilty. He doesn't hit or kick thankfully.

He has always been active and high energy. My husband was diagnosed with ADHD at a young age and took Ritalin. He is ... 34 months old so almost 3.

He has never slept through the night and still wakes 1-2x/night. He will not respond to my husband at night and cry/scream for me. We are encouraging him to try the potty and having him sit before and after meals and before and after sleeping. We read him books while he sits on the potty and give rewards and praise if he goes (he has 2x so far), but now the potty has become a spot he likes to sit and be read to.

The tantrums I just kind of zone out. I have to try really hard to not scream and reciprocate. I try to speak to him in a low, calm voice and give warning indicators that we will be leaving soon. He won't get up and and walk or take my hand when it's time to go, so at the end of the 5 minute indicator I have to pick him up and he begins thrashing.

Dear OP,

He sounds exactly like mine who is turning 5 next month.

As soon as your son turns 3, get the 5 pound weighted blanket from Amazon (the one with minky fabric on one side). The reviews will say "it's a miracle" and you will be skeptical. GET THE BLANKET. We went from every 45 minute wake-ups to once a night around 4 or 5 am. I am sending you prayers that it works for you as well as it did for me. Sleep for Mom is important at helping you be your best.

Next - Can you consider OT? We have had our son in two or three times a week since age 2. It has helped a ton with emotional regulation and giving an outlet to the need for big motor activities. It was like 1:1 private circus class in the beginning because he was so much in need. Then - if that starts to help, get a big swing at home that you can swing him in high and fast on days when there is no OT.

We let my son use a tablet on the potty. Voila - pooping on the potty everyday.

At 4 years and 8 months, my son started a super low dose of Ritalin. It has helped tremendously. We also supplement with fish oil gummies and magnesium gummies.

I could share lots more strategies, but I just want you to know you're not alone. It's not you, it's him.
I am certain you are doing a great job just by virtue of the fact that you are working on not yelling. I wish I had another. So maybe give the weighted blanket a try later this Spring and get back to sleep - and back to bed IYKWIM.

Anonymous wrote:He sounds exhausting! I'm sorry, op.

But I did notice that you said a few times that you give in--if he goes with dad he cries, he cries until he gets what he wants. You're creating a tiny monster by giving hj
What he wants when he cries. He knows that next time--he just has to cry and he gets what he wants! He should have regular time with dad every day, maybe dad does bath time and you take a walk. Every single day, so it becomes routine. Don't give in! You think you're helping him, but I think you're showing him you have inconsistent and weak boundaries and he's going to use that to his advantage, but it also scares kids when they don't know what to expect.

Anonymous wrote:He sounds exhausting! I'm sorry, op.

But I did notice that you said a few times that you give in--if he goes with dad he cries, he cries until he gets what he wants. You're creating a tiny monster by giving hj
What he wants when he cries. He knows that next time--he just has to cry and he gets what he wants! He should have regular time with dad every day, maybe dad does bath time and you take a walk. Every single day, so it becomes routine. Don't give in! You think you're helping him, but I think you're showing him you have inconsistent and weak boundaries and he's going to use that to his advantage, but it also scares kids when they don't know what to expect.