OP I’m a pakistani American (1st gen) who lives in Bethesda. I dress elegantly for work but nothing over the top. The key here is to maintain your femininity. Honestly Lahore has some of the best fashion I’ve ever seen in the world. You’re just not going to do those types of things here. It’s more of being inspired by thier creativity, willingness to use color, willingness to highlight their beauty with different color and embroidery and hairstyles makeup and jewelry and perfume. Pakistani beauty is about the whole package. Just use more color - more dashes of elegance- and you will be channeling it. And bye the way, it doesn’t photograph well like western style, it’s all about the in person experience of the style.

If you want to, you can find some of what inspires you at the mall (Macy’s!), or you can order things from Lahore and mix them into your western wardrobe. I do this (mostly I’m the summer) and people do love it.

Don’t hold back! Enjoy your heritage!


https://jeem.pk/

https://www.instagram.com/p/CYL3Dl4tO7O/?utm_medium=copy_link

https://www.instagram.com/p/CXG8a-lMuwe/?utm_medium=copy_link

NP
What about Jewish women? Any specific ways to dress?

https://instagram.com/cocobeautea?utm_medium=copy_link

https://instagram.com/maryamishtiaq?utm_medium=copy_link

https://instagram.com/storyofstyle?utm_medium=copy_link

https://instagram.com/withloveleena?utm_medium=copy_link

NP. This is a fascinating thread. I am Pakistani American and live in Bethesda. My White friends think I dress elegantly. The desi fashionistas in Bethesda think I am boring and not trendy! I get that Bethesda has a nerdier vibe than McLean but looking elegant is not hard and the women in my family (including my in-laws) are all considered “put-together.” This seems more like OP is transitioning from one social class to the next. Her curiosity does not deserve snarky responses.

OP, have you been back to Pakistan recently? Women there are far better dressed then we are here. You should start following the magazines on Instagram. They are so on trend they are the point of being shallow there! They also know how to pair Eastern looks with Western. The same can be said for my friends in India. Additionally, people from South Asia know their textiles. The weights of different types of silks, voiles, lawns, wools. South Asians also know a lot more about tailoring since many items are bespoke. I really wish I knew you in real life so I could help you and give you confidence and maybe take you shopping.

Anonymous wrote:

Indian woman here. These celebrities are trashy, not elegant, especially Padma. Beautiful is different than elegant.

Anonymous wrote:Half white, half Asian.

Elegance to me means aging gracefully (no fillers or botox), dressing cleanly and simply, without heavy makeup or jewelry. Elegance is more about mannerisms and tone (kind, listen before you speak, make eye contact, etc) and how you present yourself.

I like this. Im Indian American and honestly not very elegant. My mom looked beautiful in sari, but i don't know how to put one on myself. She wore simple not expensive clothes and shoes as an everyday uniform and wore her hair in the same way in a clip at the nape of her neck. Despite thinning hair, bad teeth, and wrinkles, she was beautiful to me and everyone who came to know her would call her elegant. I think she simply didn't care too much for frivolous things and aged gracefully. She smiled and laughed and didnt take herself too seriously. She wore huge diamond earrings and lots of gold definitely a south asian thing, and not something many White women can pull off (or maybe its just not their style).

Anonymous wrote:OP asked for women of color to post, but then a bunch of middle aged white women got all offended and tried to tell the women of color who actually posted that we are wrong (whatever, ladies, we're used to your condescending rudeness and we know you're just jealous and insecure). And once again got two completely different Indian women confused (probably the same woman who on a different thread said she got Priyanka Chopra and Padma Lakshmi mixed up all the time).

Asian woman here. Yes yes yes! Agreed to above. Damned if we do damned if we don't. White women judginess. But so many white ladies gladly partake in yoga class. A little appropriation?

Anonymous wrote:How would you know if you are elegant or stylish or well dressed? What defines it?

Yes, that's what OP is asking. Thank you for restating the question.

How would you know if you are elegant or stylish or well dressed? What defines it?

OP asked for women of color to post, but then a bunch of middle aged white women got all offended and tried to tell the women of color who actually posted that we are wrong (whatever, ladies, we're used to your condescending rudeness and we know you're just jealous and insecure). And once again got two completely different Indian women confused (probably the same woman who on a different thread said she got Priyanka Chopra and Padma Lakshmi mixed up all the time).

Anonymous wrote:

BOOOOORING. WASPY. SO UGLY. The opposite of what OP wants.

Anonymous wrote:

If look at Priyanka she has a cooler undertone hence gold will not look good on her.
It’s all about your skin tone.

This is Aishwarya Rai. Not Priyanka Chopra.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Half Pak/Kashmiri, half white. I guess I have my feet in both worlds.

I personally:

Avoid too much jewellery. I like jewellery a lot but when I stand in front of mirror before leaving for the morning, I always take off one piece

Tasteful makeup, not too bright or too much. But always some makeup.

No crazy colours on nails, but I'll still do navy nails, dark burgundy, bright pink etc.

Good quality clothing, ideally lined, for smooth sleek fit.

Styled clean hair, well brushed but not too much hairspray. Movement is good.

Honestly the rules so to speak for women regards of race, are universal.

Omg please stop. These "rules" scream WASP, and they're not universal.

Jewelry ... stop parroting a Nazi sympathizer. In Africa and South Asia, yellow gold jewelry is a beautiful marker of elegance. Visit these places, get enlightened.

As a Black woman, bright makeup looks great and elegant on me. I don't know what a "crazy color" even means re: manicures, but speak for yourself.

Hairspray? Barely a thing in my culture, and some of our natural hairstyles don't always have movement. Doesn't make them not elegant.

Your rules are boring. Not elegant. Let that brown girl magic side pop a little more.

I'm the boring Pak/white person who posted my opinion. You have a right to yours. No need to be rude. I didn't go into too much detail in my post. But since you are being somewhat blunt in your responses I will clarify

Regarding jewelry, any jewelry is elegant incl 22k. It is just not good to wear too much of any jewelry. I wear 22k jewelry. But if I wear bold earrings I'll skip the necklace. Or instead of four or five bangles I'll wear two max.

Makeup, not too bright..nit too much.I personally wear a bold bright lip. But I won't wear bright eyeshadow. Or if I play up my eyes I'll do a more neutral lip. It is all about balance. Some S. Asian women, esp for events can go a little heavy handed on the makeup.

By crazy nail colour I meant bright oranges green etc. If you like those colours that's your right. Don't be so defensive.

I referenced hairspray BC OP is Pak. I am half Pak and our hair texture us different than yours. I would not have referenced hairspray if OP was African American. Again, stop being so defensive. I was addressing this to OP. Not African American ladies.

My guidelines for myself are quite universal and not waspy. I am quite the opposite of waspy.

If look at Priyanka she has a cooler undertone hence gold will not look good on her.
It’s all about your skin tone.