Anonymous wrote:Hi OP! I breastfed all four of my kids for at least a year. I want to talk about something that could have sabotaged my experience, but luckily i was able to overcome it.

Breastfeeding in public/with others around.
My mom was ADAMENT, that women should not breastfeed their babies in front of other people and certainly not in public! This was actually very stressful during the first few weeks--people were coming over to visit and see the new baby, and he'd need to eat, and my mom would say "Go into your room and feed him!" It got LONELY in there! I'd hear everyone else hanging out and chatting and laughing, and I was stuck in another room, trying to rush through the feeding.

If you are comfortable breastfeeding in front of others, don't let other people's ignorance force you into hiding! You have the legal right to breastfeed your baby anywhere you are legally allowed to be. And no, you don't "have to" cover up! Most babies will try to move the cover anyway--because they want to look at their mom's face while they are nursing.

By all means, if you PREFER to breastfeed in private, or with a tent or other cover up--do what makes you most comfortable! But don't feel like you HAVE to!

If you don't want to use a cover but still would like to be as modest as possible, you can practice at home in front of the mirror to see how different tops/positions will look while you are nursing. Lifting a shirt up (from the bottom) will expose less of your breast than pulling it down or unbuttoning buttons. They also make special tops for breastfeeding that makes it easier.

This is good advice. It took me some time to master just discreetly feeding the baby without having to go be alone in some other place.

Once you get comfortable with this breastfeeding is easy and convenient and efficient and free! ( as long as you can produce enough).

I never had to bother packing up food and had fun taking infant wherever I needed or wanted to go. Burns tons of calories too.

Anonymous wrote:Yeah! And free houses! And free cars!

Do you really think a year’s maternity leave and a supportive partner is comparable to free houses and free cars?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My pediatrician told me no dairy and I didn’t listen because I thought it was rubbish. My son had terrible problems when I drank milk. I’m going to follow it from the beginning this time around!! I ended up nursing for 19 months but he struggled in the beginning because of the sensitivity (tummy trouble and eczema).

Pumping is helpful. It sucks but it’s good to have a few backup bottles. What if you go out and want husband to feed or 6 months in you get smashing drunk and you’d rather give baby prior milk and do a pump and dump etc.

Know that it can really hurt the first few weeks. Latching can be super painful as your nipples adjust even with good latch. Seeing a lactation consultant can help. But it gets better.

+1. The medical community is all over the place with this dairy-or-no-dairy for nursing mothers but I luckily developed a dairy-aversion in my last months of pregnancy and just stayed with the no dairy for a full year after.

I've eaten more dairy postpartum than ever before in my life. Dairy every day multiple times a day. Started even drinking milk again! I'm hoping the dairy cravings resolve when I'm done nursing. My child has no tummy troubles or eczema and I would advise listen to your body. If you have a dairy aversion then sure avoid - but if you are like me and want dairy ALL the time then it is ok too. I would not blindly follow this dairy advice for no reason. I figure my body needs the calcium to produce breastmilk and better from dairy I'm consuming than from my bones. (There are of course other calcium rich foods but my body wants dairy... what can I say.)

I had a really challenging time with breastfeeding - post c-section. Make sure you have enough support postpartum - if you do end up needing to pump it is very helpful if there is someone there to help hold the baby. (I should have hired a post partum doula earlier than I did to have this support - but family and partner are also good if you have them.) My child did not have a tongue tie but was somehow not able to suck effectively - we did body work with an osteopath - and it was a total gamechanger.

For me persistence was necessary - I would say nursing finally started going well for us close to 4 months - there were times earlier where I wondered whether it was all worth it - and now that nursing is going really well - it is. But it was helpful to have some support to keep going. In addition to my doctors' support, I joined a lactation support group and having support from other women who had challenges and the LC was very helpful - hopefully this advice will be unnecessary for you though... Best of luck!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, take classes at the Breastfeeding Center prior to birth and, yes, find a good, highly recommended lactation consultant to meet you at the hospital at the birth as well as schedule a few home sessions.

And yes, start getting used to drinking lots of water!

My other advice is to have your home life set and conducive to nursing in the first six months. DH and I had lots of discussions and made plans for my responsibilities to be only the baby and self-care. I was not expected to do meals, laundry, cleaning, errands, etc. Turned out I could and did do a lot of those things after the first month or so but we definitely planned on making the baby and myself the only priority.

Good luck, OP!

This. Having a relaxing home life is extremely important. DH happily took care of everything except breastfeeding our baby! He used his paternity leave and vacation to stay home with us for the first eight weeks.

I also planned a year long break in graduate school to spend at home with our baby. It was wonderful not to have to worry about getting the baby used to bottles for daycare or do sleep training. It really should be this easy for all mothers.

LOL at this. I had seven weeks of maternity leave, DH took his 2 weeks of parental immediately after that. Both of us in demanding 'big jobs' with commutes. Absolutely nothing relaxing about any part of our first year...and yet I successfully breastfed/pumped for 16 months, even through DD's severe protein intolerances. The dietary restrictions were hard, and pumping was annoying, but I never had physical pain or supply issues so I consider myself lucky.

I have no clue why this made you laugh out loud. Especially after adding that you considered yourself lucky.

Because of the bolded. Like, really? So tone-deaf...

No, so on point. It really should be that easy for all new mothers.

Hi OP! I breastfed all four of my kids for at least a year. I want to talk about something that could have sabotaged my experience, but luckily i was able to overcome it.

Breastfeeding in public/with others around.
My mom was ADAMENT, that women should not breastfeed their babies in front of other people and certainly not in public! This was actually very stressful during the first few weeks--people were coming over to visit and see the new baby, and he'd need to eat, and my mom would say "Go into your room and feed him!" It got LONELY in there! I'd hear everyone else hanging out and chatting and laughing, and I was stuck in another room, trying to rush through the feeding.

If you are comfortable breastfeeding in front of others, don't let other people's ignorance force you into hiding! You have the legal right to breastfeed your baby anywhere you are legally allowed to be. And no, you don't "have to" cover up! Most babies will try to move the cover anyway--because they want to look at their mom's face while they are nursing.

By all means, if you PREFER to breastfeed in private, or with a tent or other cover up--do what makes you most comfortable! But don't feel like you HAVE to!

If you don't want to use a cover but still would like to be as modest as possible, you can practice at home in front of the mirror to see how different tops/positions will look while you are nursing. Lifting a shirt up (from the bottom) will expose less of your breast than pulling it down or unbuttoning buttons. They also make special tops for breastfeeding that makes it easier.

OP I would caution you on getting your heart set on anything when it comes to delivery and feeding your baby. You may be setting yourself up for postpartum mood issues if you aren’t able to feed the way you want. There is much you can do to set yourself up for success and stack the deck in your favor - but ultimately you may not have control over what happens. Your baby may have low blood sugar and need formula from the moment of birth. Your baby may not latch well and require syringe feeding. You may hate nursing or find it makes you feel trapped or experience dysphoric milk ejection reflex (think that is what it’s called). You may be among the 15 percent of women who produce insufficient milk. You may have a baby with allergies who requires special formula. So much can happen and life does not always follow our plans and it’s okay. Be ok with all outcomes as long as baby is fed and you will do your mental health and family a big favor.

Yeah! And free houses! And free cars!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, take classes at the Breastfeeding Center prior to birth and, yes, find a good, highly recommended lactation consultant to meet you at the hospital at the birth as well as schedule a few home sessions.

And yes, start getting used to drinking lots of water!

My other advice is to have your home life set and conducive to nursing in the first six months. DH and I had lots of discussions and made plans for my responsibilities to be only the baby and self-care. I was not expected to do meals, laundry, cleaning, errands, etc. Turned out I could and did do a lot of those things after the first month or so but we definitely planned on making the baby and myself the only priority.

Good luck, OP!

This. Having a relaxing home life is extremely important. DH happily took care of everything except breastfeeding our baby! He used his paternity leave and vacation to stay home with us for the first eight weeks.

I also planned a year long break in graduate school to spend at home with our baby. It was wonderful not to have to worry about getting the baby used to bottles for daycare or do sleep training. It really should be this easy for all mothers.

LOL at this. I had seven weeks of maternity leave, DH took his 2 weeks of parental immediately after that. Both of us in demanding 'big jobs' with commutes. Absolutely nothing relaxing about any part of our first year...and yet I successfully breastfed/pumped for 16 months, even through DD's severe protein intolerances. The dietary restrictions were hard, and pumping was annoying, but I never had physical pain or supply issues so I consider myself lucky.

I have no clue why this made you laugh out loud. Especially after adding that you considered yourself lucky.

Because of the bolded. Like, really? So tone-deaf...

PP isn't wrong. It SHOULD be that easy for all mothers, which is why we need better maternity leave, rather than the pitiful excuse the US currently has.

After reading all this I am glad I only breastfed for a short while. I would have been one unhappy mamma.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, take classes at the Breastfeeding Center prior to birth and, yes, find a good, highly recommended lactation consultant to meet you at the hospital at the birth as well as schedule a few home sessions.

And yes, start getting used to drinking lots of water!

My other advice is to have your home life set and conducive to nursing in the first six months. DH and I had lots of discussions and made plans for my responsibilities to be only the baby and self-care. I was not expected to do meals, laundry, cleaning, errands, etc. Turned out I could and did do a lot of those things after the first month or so but we definitely planned on making the baby and myself the only priority.

Good luck, OP!

This. Having a relaxing home life is extremely important. DH happily took care of everything except breastfeeding our baby! He used his paternity leave and vacation to stay home with us for the first eight weeks.

I also planned a year long break in graduate school to spend at home with our baby. It was wonderful not to have to worry about getting the baby used to bottles for daycare or do sleep training. It really should be this easy for all mothers.

LOL at this. I had seven weeks of maternity leave, DH took his 2 weeks of parental immediately after that. Both of us in demanding 'big jobs' with commutes. Absolutely nothing relaxing about any part of our first year...and yet I successfully breastfed/pumped for 16 months, even through DD's severe protein intolerances. The dietary restrictions were hard, and pumping was annoying, but I never had physical pain or supply issues so I consider myself lucky.

I have no clue why this made you laugh out loud. Especially after adding that you considered yourself lucky.

Because of the bolded. Like, really? So tone-deaf...

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, take classes at the Breastfeeding Center prior to birth and, yes, find a good, highly recommended lactation consultant to meet you at the hospital at the birth as well as schedule a few home sessions.

And yes, start getting used to drinking lots of water!

My other advice is to have your home life set and conducive to nursing in the first six months. DH and I had lots of discussions and made plans for my responsibilities to be only the baby and self-care. I was not expected to do meals, laundry, cleaning, errands, etc. Turned out I could and did do a lot of those things after the first month or so but we definitely planned on making the baby and myself the only priority.

Good luck, OP!

This. Having a relaxing home life is extremely important. DH happily took care of everything except breastfeeding our baby! He used his paternity leave and vacation to stay home with us for the first eight weeks.

I also planned a year long break in graduate school to spend at home with our baby. It was wonderful not to have to worry about getting the baby used to bottles for daycare or do sleep training. It really should be this easy for all mothers.

LOL at this. I had seven weeks of maternity leave, DH took his 2 weeks of parental immediately after that. Both of us in demanding 'big jobs' with commutes. Absolutely nothing relaxing about any part of our first year...and yet I successfully breastfed/pumped for 16 months, even through DD's severe protein intolerances. The dietary restrictions were hard, and pumping was annoying, but I never had physical pain or supply issues so I consider myself lucky.

I also had a kid with severe intolerances. It made BFing harder, however, I was lucky that I had decided to BF him because there was only 1 brand of formula that he could end up having. It was hard to get, super expensive and he refused to take it (and I don’t blame him, it smelled so disgusting I couldn’t imagine drinking it). FWIW, My second didn’t have the same food allergies and I BF him only for 6 months and switched to formula. I think I had PTSD from the first.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, take classes at the Breastfeeding Center prior to birth and, yes, find a good, highly recommended lactation consultant to meet you at the hospital at the birth as well as schedule a few home sessions.

And yes, start getting used to drinking lots of water!

My other advice is to have your home life set and conducive to nursing in the first six months. DH and I had lots of discussions and made plans for my responsibilities to be only the baby and self-care. I was not expected to do meals, laundry, cleaning, errands, etc. Turned out I could and did do a lot of those things after the first month or so but we definitely planned on making the baby and myself the only priority.

Good luck, OP!

This. Having a relaxing home life is extremely important. DH happily took care of everything except breastfeeding our baby! He used his paternity leave and vacation to stay home with us for the first eight weeks.

I also planned a year long break in graduate school to spend at home with our baby. It was wonderful not to have to worry about getting the baby used to bottles for daycare or do sleep training. It really should be this easy for all mothers.

LOL at this. I had seven weeks of maternity leave, DH took his 2 weeks of parental immediately after that. Both of us in demanding 'big jobs' with commutes. Absolutely nothing relaxing about any part of our first year...and yet I successfully breastfed/pumped for 16 months, even through DD's severe protein intolerances. The dietary restrictions were hard, and pumping was annoying, but I never had physical pain or supply issues so I consider myself lucky.

I have no clue why this made you laugh out loud. Especially after adding that you considered yourself lucky.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, take classes at the Breastfeeding Center prior to birth and, yes, find a good, highly recommended lactation consultant to meet you at the hospital at the birth as well as schedule a few home sessions.

And yes, start getting used to drinking lots of water!

My other advice is to have your home life set and conducive to nursing in the first six months. DH and I had lots of discussions and made plans for my responsibilities to be only the baby and self-care. I was not expected to do meals, laundry, cleaning, errands, etc. Turned out I could and did do a lot of those things after the first month or so but we definitely planned on making the baby and myself the only priority.

Good luck, OP!

This. Having a relaxing home life is extremely important. DH happily took care of everything except breastfeeding our baby! He used his paternity leave and vacation to stay home with us for the first eight weeks.

I also planned a year long break in graduate school to spend at home with our baby. It was wonderful not to have to worry about getting the baby used to bottles for daycare or do sleep training. It really should be this easy for all mothers.

LOL at this. I had seven weeks of maternity leave, DH took his 2 weeks of parental immediately after that. Both of us in demanding 'big jobs' with commutes. Absolutely nothing relaxing about any part of our first year...and yet I successfully breastfed/pumped for 16 months, even through DD's severe protein intolerances. The dietary restrictions were hard, and pumping was annoying, but I never had physical pain or supply issues so I consider myself lucky.

I took a Breastfeeding Center class and had a lactation consultant appointment right after coming home from the hospital. I received excellent advice. One of the key things id to nurse as often as your baby wants when they are a newborn (on demand).

Definitely take breastfeeding center classes. Line up a lactation consultant there to see post partum and go to their breastfeeding support groups.

But it may come down to your body and your baby. I breastfed 2 kids. I had a lot of difficulty breastfeeding my first. I thought I’d gotten the hang of things then my supply dropped and I ended up supplementing with formula then she lost interest in nursing and I switched to formula all together. My 2nd nursed right after birth and I never had latch, supply, or interest issues and nursed for 18 months.

Give yourself grace. Listen to your body and you’re baby. It doesn’t work for every person and every baby, no matter what you do.