Anonymous wrote:presumably since this is a june post the child has a spring birthday and just turned 15. that is not weird or especially uncommon

Considering that most people don't turn 15 until the summer between 9th and 10th grade, this is exceptionally uncommon.

presumably since this is a june post the child has a spring birthday and just turned 15. that is not weird or especially uncommon

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Anonymous wrote:Look kids aren’t dumb, they figure it out and often attribute any supposed advantages (height, weight, muscle mass, etc.) that an older peer might have to their older age. Children are very focused on people’s ages in general, haven’t you noticed this? It’s one of the first things they ask.

My kid has a fall birthday. He was 13 throughout 8th grade. He took 3 ninth grade classes (4 if you include FL) and played on the JV tennis team. He’ll start on varsity this year. He’s aware that he’s younger than his peers and I think it adds to his confidence level that he keeps up rather than detracting from it. I remember being in 6th grade and thinking that the few kids who were a whole year older than us were the “dumb” or “slow” ones because they should have been in a higher grade.

Do what you want but, on the whole, I don’t think you are doing your kid any favors by holding them back.

There are several "held back" kids in my kids' grades. In no way are they outcasts, looked down on, or considered dumb or slow. They have as many friends as the rest and the kids may know their age but it's more like "How come he gets to be the first one to be 8" so all the doom and gloom doesn't exist at all from what I can see.

Maybe at 8 but kids become much shrewder and aware of how hierarchies work in the real world by middle school. Plus you don’t know what any of these kids privately think in their heads. It’s not like I announced my thoughts to anyone, I knew they were not “nice.” Just honest.

My brother, on the other hand, started K as a 4 year old and struggled a lot more academically, socially, etc. He should have been held back.

Your parents aren't alone in sending kids to school before they're ready. I made the exact same mistake. I sent my December-born son to Kindergarten at 4 and also struggled in school. Not only did he graduate high school without having taken any Calculus, but he also took 6 years to get his Bachelor's degree. To this day, I still regret not waiting a year. Had I waited a year, I just know he would've graduated college in the normal 4 years, and not experienced the humiliation of watching all his friends graduate before him.

He would have struggled regardless of the grade he was in and needed more help and support. Some kids aren’t math kids and you don’t need calculus in the real world. 6 years for college is absurd. There is clearly more going on than age.

You sound like a dick.

The PP is just calling this parent out for clearly sheltering their son from responsibility. When someone drops out of college, most of the blame, if not all, falls on the drop-out. This doesn't mean their son shouldn't have gotten some help and empathy, but this parent is completely absolving their kid of any responsibility.

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Anonymous wrote:Look kids aren’t dumb, they figure it out and often attribute any supposed advantages (height, weight, muscle mass, etc.) that an older peer might have to their older age. Children are very focused on people’s ages in general, haven’t you noticed this? It’s one of the first things they ask.

My kid has a fall birthday. He was 13 throughout 8th grade. He took 3 ninth grade classes (4 if you include FL) and played on the JV tennis team. He’ll start on varsity this year. He’s aware that he’s younger than his peers and I think it adds to his confidence level that he keeps up rather than detracting from it. I remember being in 6th grade and thinking that the few kids who were a whole year older than us were the “dumb” or “slow” ones because they should have been in a higher grade.

Do what you want but, on the whole, I don’t think you are doing your kid any favors by holding them back.

There are several "held back" kids in my kids' grades. In no way are they outcasts, looked down on, or considered dumb or slow. They have as many friends as the rest and the kids may know their age but it's more like "How come he gets to be the first one to be 8" so all the doom and gloom doesn't exist at all from what I can see.

Maybe at 8 but kids become much shrewder and aware of how hierarchies work in the real world by middle school. Plus you don’t know what any of these kids privately think in their heads. It’s not like I announced my thoughts to anyone, I knew they were not “nice.” Just honest.

My brother, on the other hand, started K as a 4 year old and struggled a lot more academically, socially, etc. He should have been held back.

Your parents aren't alone in sending kids to school before they're ready. I made the exact same mistake. I sent my December-born son to Kindergarten at 4 and also struggled in school. Not only did he graduate high school without having taken any Calculus, but he also took 6 years to get his Bachelor's degree. To this day, I still regret not waiting a year. Had I waited a year, I just know he would've graduated college in the normal 4 years, and not experienced the humiliation of watching all his friends graduate before him.

He would have struggled regardless of the grade he was in and needed more help and support. Some kids aren’t math kids and you don’t need calculus in the real world. 6 years for college is absurd. There is clearly more going on than age.

Wow, are you a developmental pediatrician or do you just play one on the internet?

Holding him back a year would not have fixed those issues.

Had I held him back a year, he would've started college at 18, meaning he would've been more ready for college and less likely to drop out. I don't know anyone who started college at 18 that dropped out or took longer than 4 years.

Yeah, all 18 year’s old are more likely to drop out of high school and I actually know someone who did.

Uh, no. High school teachers literally make it impossible to drop out or not graduate on time. College professors couldn't care less about whether their students drop out or fail to graduate on time. Dropping out of college is a much more real possibility, and being 18 upon starting college minimizes that possibility.

I am a high school teacher and a high school parent and I have no idea what you are talking about with teachers having some magical power to make it impossible for kids to drop out.

High school teachers are very reluctant to fail any of their studentss

8th: 12-14; most are 13 turning 14 during school year
9th: 13-15; most are 14 turning 15
10th: 14-16; most are 15 turning 16
11th: 15-17; most are 16 turning 17
12th: 16-18; most are 17 turning 18
F: 17-19, most 18 turning 19
S: 18-20, most 19 turning 20
J: 19-21, most 20 turning 21
S: 20-22, most 21 turning 22

This is still true for NY. They will just have more kids on the younger end of the spectrum.

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Anonymous wrote:Look kids aren’t dumb, they figure it out and often attribute any supposed advantages (height, weight, muscle mass, etc.) that an older peer might have to their older age. Children are very focused on people’s ages in general, haven’t you noticed this? It’s one of the first things they ask.

My kid has a fall birthday. He was 13 throughout 8th grade. He took 3 ninth grade classes (4 if you include FL) and played on the JV tennis team. He’ll start on varsity this year. He’s aware that he’s younger than his peers and I think it adds to his confidence level that he keeps up rather than detracting from it. I remember being in 6th grade and thinking that the few kids who were a whole year older than us were the “dumb” or “slow” ones because they should have been in a higher grade.

Do what you want but, on the whole, I don’t think you are doing your kid any favors by holding them back.

There are several "held back" kids in my kids' grades. In no way are they outcasts, looked down on, or considered dumb or slow. They have as many friends as the rest and the kids may know their age but it's more like "How come he gets to be the first one to be 8" so all the doom and gloom doesn't exist at all from what I can see.

Maybe at 8 but kids become much shrewder and aware of how hierarchies work in the real world by middle school. Plus you don’t know what any of these kids privately think in their heads. It’s not like I announced my thoughts to anyone, I knew they were not “nice.” Just honest.

My brother, on the other hand, started K as a 4 year old and struggled a lot more academically, socially, etc. He should have been held back.

Your parents aren't alone in sending kids to school before they're ready. I made the exact same mistake. I sent my December-born son to Kindergarten at 4 and also struggled in school. Not only did he graduate high school without having taken any Calculus, but he also took 6 years to get his Bachelor's degree. To this day, I still regret not waiting a year. Had I waited a year, I just know he would've graduated college in the normal 4 years, and not experienced the humiliation of watching all his friends graduate before him.

He would have struggled regardless of the grade he was in and needed more help and support. Some kids aren’t math kids and you don’t need calculus in the real world. 6 years for college is absurd. There is clearly more going on than age.

Wow, are you a developmental pediatrician or do you just play one on the internet?

Holding him back a year would not have fixed those issues.

Had I held him back a year, he would've started college at 18, meaning he would've been more ready for college and less likely to drop out. I don't know anyone who started college at 18 that dropped out or took longer than 4 years.

Yeah, all 18 year’s old are more likely to drop out of high school and I actually know someone who did.

Uh, no. High school teachers literally make it impossible to drop out or not graduate on time. College professors couldn't care less about whether their students drop out or fail to graduate on time. Dropping out of college is a much more real possibility, and being 18 upon starting college minimizes that possibility.

I am a high school teacher and a high school parent and I have no idea what you are talking about with teachers having some magical power to make it impossible for kids to drop out.

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Anonymous wrote:Look kids aren’t dumb, they figure it out and often attribute any supposed advantages (height, weight, muscle mass, etc.) that an older peer might have to their older age. Children are very focused on people’s ages in general, haven’t you noticed this? It’s one of the first things they ask.

My kid has a fall birthday. He was 13 throughout 8th grade. He took 3 ninth grade classes (4 if you include FL) and played on the JV tennis team. He’ll start on varsity this year. He’s aware that he’s younger than his peers and I think it adds to his confidence level that he keeps up rather than detracting from it. I remember being in 6th grade and thinking that the few kids who were a whole year older than us were the “dumb” or “slow” ones because they should have been in a higher grade.

Do what you want but, on the whole, I don’t think you are doing your kid any favors by holding them back.

There are several "held back" kids in my kids' grades. In no way are they outcasts, looked down on, or considered dumb or slow. They have as many friends as the rest and the kids may know their age but it's more like "How come he gets to be the first one to be 8" so all the doom and gloom doesn't exist at all from what I can see.

Maybe at 8 but kids become much shrewder and aware of how hierarchies work in the real world by middle school. Plus you don’t know what any of these kids privately think in their heads. It’s not like I announced my thoughts to anyone, I knew they were not “nice.” Just honest.

My brother, on the other hand, started K as a 4 year old and struggled a lot more academically, socially, etc. He should have been held back.

Your parents aren't alone in sending kids to school before they're ready. I made the exact same mistake. I sent my December-born son to Kindergarten at 4 and also struggled in school. Not only did he graduate high school without having taken any Calculus, but he also took 6 years to get his Bachelor's degree. To this day, I still regret not waiting a year. Had I waited a year, I just know he would've graduated college in the normal 4 years, and not experienced the humiliation of watching all his friends graduate before him.

He would have struggled regardless of the grade he was in and needed more help and support. Some kids aren’t math kids and you don’t need calculus in the real world. 6 years for college is absurd. There is clearly more going on than age.

Wow, are you a developmental pediatrician or do you just play one on the internet?

Holding him back a year would not have fixed those issues.

Had I held him back a year, he would've started college at 18, meaning he would've been more ready for college and less likely to drop out. I don't know anyone who started college at 18 that dropped out or took longer than 4 years.

Yeah, all 18 year’s old are more likely to drop out of high school and I actually know someone who did.

Uh, no. High school teachers literally make it impossible to drop out or not graduate on time. College professors couldn't care less about whether their students drop out or fail to graduate on time. Dropping out of college is a much more real possibility, and being 18 upon starting college minimizes that possibility.

Are high school teachers tying them down or caging them?

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Anonymous wrote:I'm not sure why this is such a big deal. Most 8th graders will turn 14 at some point during the year, and many will be almost 15 at the end of the school year. So it's not that big a difference. 14.5 is probably the norm.

My child turns 13 during 8th grade so that’s a two year age difference. It’s a big difference.

Your child was 12 in 8th grade? That is not the norm at all! Most are 13 and turn 14 that year. My 14.5 year old just finished 8th and my 12 year old is now going into 7th. And we sent them on time. Your math seems off!

Your math is off, my child was 13 the entire 8th grade year.

All the birthdays my child attended in 8th grade were for kids turning 14. Nobody was 12, turning 13.

Mine was. What about the fall birthdays?? Why do people assume no kids are born in the fall or, if they are, they are held back?

Because in most places the fall birthdays are the oldest kids. Only a small number of districts have such late cutoffs. This just simply isn't a thing anymore in most places.

DC is such a transient area. We moved here from NY where the cutoff is late Nov or early Dec, I forget. But yes, lots of fall bdays. And you can’t redshirt there. If you hold your kid back, they’ll just enroll him in first grade, lol.

NY is about one of the only places that has late cutoffs. Virtually everywhere else doesn't. The sun doesn't rise or set on what NY does when it's an outlier.

https://ny.chalkbeat.org/2020/2/4/21178551/your-child-s-birth-month-matters-nyc-students-born-in-november-and-december-are-classified-with-lear

Don't care what NY does.

You do realize that while NY only makes up 2% of the country state-wise, it makes up much more of the country population-wise.

NY and some of the NYC suburbs in other states are the only ones holding on to this end of the calendar year cutoff. It’s irrelevant to the rest of the US and the DC Metro area, all of which has a cutoff date in the summer or early fall. If you want to post about NY school issues I’m sure there’s forums about that.

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Anonymous wrote:I'm not sure why this is such a big deal. Most 8th graders will turn 14 at some point during the year, and many will be almost 15 at the end of the school year. So it's not that big a difference. 14.5 is probably the norm.

My child turns 13 during 8th grade so that’s a two year age difference. It’s a big difference.

Your child was 12 in 8th grade? That is not the norm at all! Most are 13 and turn 14 that year. My 14.5 year old just finished 8th and my 12 year old is now going into 7th. And we sent them on time. Your math seems off!

Your math is off, my child was 13 the entire 8th grade year.

All the birthdays my child attended in 8th grade were for kids turning 14. Nobody was 12, turning 13.

Mine was. What about the fall birthdays?? Why do people assume no kids are born in the fall or, if they are, they are held back?

Because in most places the fall birthdays are the oldest kids. Only a small number of districts have such late cutoffs. This just simply isn't a thing anymore in most places.

DC is such a transient area. We moved here from NY where the cutoff is late Nov or early Dec, I forget. But yes, lots of fall bdays. And you can’t redshirt there. If you hold your kid back, they’ll just enroll him in first grade, lol.

NY is about one of the only places that has late cutoffs. Virtually everywhere else doesn't. The sun doesn't rise or set on what NY does when it's an outlier.

https://ny.chalkbeat.org/2020/2/4/21178551/your-child-s-birth-month-matters-nyc-students-born-in-november-and-december-are-classified-with-lear

Don't care what NY does.

You do realize that while NY only makes up 2% of the country state-wise, it makes up much more of the country population-wise.

I had to hold my youngest back in kindergarten, he was diagnosed with dyslexia in first grade, I pulled him out at the beginning of 3rd and homeschooled him for three years, with a specialized program that my mother created for him, I put him back in school in 6th, and he was reading, writing, and comprehending on a college level by age 13. I just pulled him out for good in April and enrolled him in the GED program, because he's finished with school and knows more than the teachers. He's working and he'll be way ahead of his classmates by the time he's 18. He would have graduated just before turning 19, but he'd not benefit from those extra two years in school. If a kid knows more than their teachers, no point in letting it drag out. Better to be making money. You can enroll your child in the GED program at age 16 in my state. Schools do not tell parents about the GED program in my state, because you must withdraw from public to enter the program, and they lose funding. A GED does not hinder you in any way in your adult life. If you're determined to make something of yourself, nothing can stop you. And yes, we reversed dyslexia. My mother should market her program, but she won't. He was also diagnosed with severe ADHD at age 6, but I worked hard with him and taught him to control himself without meds. Anything is possible if you try. Nothing is possible if you do not try. Holding children back is only beneficial for them when they are small. Jumping them ahead when they are ready to do so helps build self-esteem. My son is confident and sure of himself, because he's ahead of the game. Parents should work hard to educate their children at home, and not just depend on the schools to do it, because they need to be learning constantly. That's what we do in my family. We educate.

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Anonymous wrote:Look kids aren’t dumb, they figure it out and often attribute any supposed advantages (height, weight, muscle mass, etc.) that an older peer might have to their older age. Children are very focused on people’s ages in general, haven’t you noticed this? It’s one of the first things they ask.

My kid has a fall birthday. He was 13 throughout 8th grade. He took 3 ninth grade classes (4 if you include FL) and played on the JV tennis team. He’ll start on varsity this year. He’s aware that he’s younger than his peers and I think it adds to his confidence level that he keeps up rather than detracting from it. I remember being in 6th grade and thinking that the few kids who were a whole year older than us were the “dumb” or “slow” ones because they should have been in a higher grade.

Do what you want but, on the whole, I don’t think you are doing your kid any favors by holding them back.

There are several "held back" kids in my kids' grades. In no way are they outcasts, looked down on, or considered dumb or slow. They have as many friends as the rest and the kids may know their age but it's more like "How come he gets to be the first one to be 8" so all the doom and gloom doesn't exist at all from what I can see.

Maybe at 8 but kids become much shrewder and aware of how hierarchies work in the real world by middle school. Plus you don’t know what any of these kids privately think in their heads. It’s not like I announced my thoughts to anyone, I knew they were not “nice.” Just honest.

My brother, on the other hand, started K as a 4 year old and struggled a lot more academically, socially, etc. He should have been held back.

Your parents aren't alone in sending kids to school before they're ready. I made the exact same mistake. I sent my December-born son to Kindergarten at 4 and also struggled in school. Not only did he graduate high school without having taken any Calculus, but he also took 6 years to get his Bachelor's degree. To this day, I still regret not waiting a year. Had I waited a year, I just know he would've graduated college in the normal 4 years, and not experienced the humiliation of watching all his friends graduate before him.

He would have struggled regardless of the grade he was in and needed more help and support. Some kids aren’t math kids and you don’t need calculus in the real world. 6 years for college is absurd. There is clearly more going on than age.

Wow, are you a developmental pediatrician or do you just play one on the internet?

Holding him back a year would not have fixed those issues.

Had I held him back a year, he would've started college at 18, meaning he would've been more ready for college and less likely to drop out. I don't know anyone who started college at 18 that dropped out or took longer than 4 years.

Yeah, all 18 year’s old are more likely to drop out of high school and I actually know someone who did.

Uh, no. High school teachers literally make it impossible to drop out or not graduate on time. College professors couldn't care less about whether their students drop out or fail to graduate on time. Dropping out of college is a much more real possibility, and being 18 upon starting college minimizes that possibility.

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Anonymous wrote:I'm not sure why this is such a big deal. Most 8th graders will turn 14 at some point during the year, and many will be almost 15 at the end of the school year. So it's not that big a difference. 14.5 is probably the norm.

My child turns 13 during 8th grade so that’s a two year age difference. It’s a big difference.

Your child was 12 in 8th grade? That is not the norm at all! Most are 13 and turn 14 that year. My 14.5 year old just finished 8th and my 12 year old is now going into 7th. And we sent them on time. Your math seems off!

Your math is off, my child was 13 the entire 8th grade year.

All the birthdays my child attended in 8th grade were for kids turning 14. Nobody was 12, turning 13.

Mine was. What about the fall birthdays?? Why do people assume no kids are born in the fall or, if they are, they are held back?

Because in most places the fall birthdays are the oldest kids. Only a small number of districts have such late cutoffs. This just simply isn't a thing anymore in most places.

DC is such a transient area. We moved here from NY where the cutoff is late Nov or early Dec, I forget. But yes, lots of fall bdays. And you can’t redshirt there. If you hold your kid back, they’ll just enroll him in first grade, lol.

NY is about one of the only places that has late cutoffs. Virtually everywhere else doesn't. The sun doesn't rise or set on what NY does when it's an outlier.

https://ny.chalkbeat.org/2020/2/4/21178551/your-child-s-birth-month-matters-nyc-students-born-in-november-and-december-are-classified-with-lear

Don't care what NY does.

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Anonymous wrote:Look kids aren’t dumb, they figure it out and often attribute any supposed advantages (height, weight, muscle mass, etc.) that an older peer might have to their older age. Children are very focused on people’s ages in general, haven’t you noticed this? It’s one of the first things they ask.

My kid has a fall birthday. He was 13 throughout 8th grade. He took 3 ninth grade classes (4 if you include FL) and played on the JV tennis team. He’ll start on varsity this year. He’s aware that he’s younger than his peers and I think it adds to his confidence level that he keeps up rather than detracting from it. I remember being in 6th grade and thinking that the few kids who were a whole year older than us were the “dumb” or “slow” ones because they should have been in a higher grade.

Do what you want but, on the whole, I don’t think you are doing your kid any favors by holding them back.

There are several "held back" kids in my kids' grades. In no way are they outcasts, looked down on, or considered dumb or slow. They have as many friends as the rest and the kids may know their age but it's more like "How come he gets to be the first one to be 8" so all the doom and gloom doesn't exist at all from what I can see.

Maybe at 8 but kids become much shrewder and aware of how hierarchies work in the real world by middle school. Plus you don’t know what any of these kids privately think in their heads. It’s not like I announced my thoughts to anyone, I knew they were not “nice.” Just honest.

My brother, on the other hand, started K as a 4 year old and struggled a lot more academically, socially, etc. He should have been held back.

Your parents aren't alone in sending kids to school before they're ready. I made the exact same mistake. I sent my December-born son to Kindergarten at 4 and also struggled in school. Not only did he graduate high school without having taken any Calculus, but he also took 6 years to get his Bachelor's degree. To this day, I still regret not waiting a year. Had I waited a year, I just know he would've graduated college in the normal 4 years, and not experienced the humiliation of watching all his friends graduate before him.

He would have struggled regardless of the grade he was in and needed more help and support. Some kids aren’t math kids and you don’t need calculus in the real world. 6 years for college is absurd. There is clearly more going on than age.

You sound like a dick.

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Anonymous wrote:I'm not sure why this is such a big deal. Most 8th graders will turn 14 at some point during the year, and many will be almost 15 at the end of the school year. So it's not that big a difference. 14.5 is probably the norm.

My child turns 13 during 8th grade so that’s a two year age difference. It’s a big difference.

Your child was 12 in 8th grade? That is not the norm at all! Most are 13 and turn 14 that year. My 14.5 year old just finished 8th and my 12 year old is now going into 7th. And we sent them on time. Your math seems off!

Your math is off, my child was 13 the entire 8th grade year.

All the birthdays my child attended in 8th grade were for kids turning 14. Nobody was 12, turning 13.

Mine was. What about the fall birthdays?? Why do people assume no kids are born in the fall or, if they are, they are held back?

Because in most places the fall birthdays are the oldest kids. Only a small number of districts have such late cutoffs. This just simply isn't a thing anymore in most places.

DC is such a transient area. We moved here from NY where the cutoff is late Nov or early Dec, I forget. But yes, lots of fall bdays. And you can’t redshirt there. If you hold your kid back, they’ll just enroll him in first grade, lol.

NY is about one of the only places that has late cutoffs. Virtually everywhere else doesn't. The sun doesn't rise or set on what NY does when it's an outlier.

https://ny.chalkbeat.org/2020/2/4/21178551/your-child-s-birth-month-matters-nyc-students-born-in-november-and-december-are-classified-with-lear

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Anonymous wrote:Look kids aren’t dumb, they figure it out and often attribute any supposed advantages (height, weight, muscle mass, etc.) that an older peer might have to their older age. Children are very focused on people’s ages in general, haven’t you noticed this? It’s one of the first things they ask.

My kid has a fall birthday. He was 13 throughout 8th grade. He took 3 ninth grade classes (4 if you include FL) and played on the JV tennis team. He’ll start on varsity this year. He’s aware that he’s younger than his peers and I think it adds to his confidence level that he keeps up rather than detracting from it. I remember being in 6th grade and thinking that the few kids who were a whole year older than us were the “dumb” or “slow” ones because they should have been in a higher grade.

Do what you want but, on the whole, I don’t think you are doing your kid any favors by holding them back.

There are several "held back" kids in my kids' grades. In no way are they outcasts, looked down on, or considered dumb or slow. They have as many friends as the rest and the kids may know their age but it's more like "How come he gets to be the first one to be 8" so all the doom and gloom doesn't exist at all from what I can see.

Maybe at 8 but kids become much shrewder and aware of how hierarchies work in the real world by middle school. Plus you don’t know what any of these kids privately think in their heads. It’s not like I announced my thoughts to anyone, I knew they were not “nice.” Just honest.

My brother, on the other hand, started K as a 4 year old and struggled a lot more academically, socially, etc. He should have been held back.

Your parents aren't alone in sending kids to school before they're ready. I made the exact same mistake. I sent my December-born son to Kindergarten at 4 and also struggled in school. Not only did he graduate high school without having taken any Calculus, but he also took 6 years to get his Bachelor's degree. To this day, I still regret not waiting a year. Had I waited a year, I just know he would've graduated college in the normal 4 years, and not experienced the humiliation of watching all his friends graduate before him.

He would have struggled regardless of the grade he was in and needed more help and support. Some kids aren’t math kids and you don’t need calculus in the real world. 6 years for college is absurd. There is clearly more going on than age.

Wow, are you a developmental pediatrician or do you just play one on the internet?

Holding him back a year would not have fixed those issues.

Had I held him back a year, he would've started college at 18, meaning he would've been more ready for college and less likely to drop out. I don't know anyone who started college at 18 that dropped out or took longer than 4 years.

Yeah, all 18 year’s old are more likely to drop out of high school and I actually know someone who did.