Anonymous
Post 03/08/2012 16:21     Subject: Re:I'm an African American. Ask me anything.
Anonymous wrote:Yes, makes complete sense. And thanks for responding (the other pps too, thanks). FWIW, we all have lunch together and often get into some major heated political debates. It looks like we all enjoy it and get something from it - but there does seem to be a lot of "holding back" or not as much of a robust debate when some black leaders are brought up - which is why I asked. But you make a lot of sense and I didn't think of it that way. Thanks.


This post was for both 16:13 posters and 16:07 poster.
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2012 16:20     Subject: I'm an African American. Ask me anything.
Damn, AA OP!

27 pages later

Signed,
Shocked White Poster
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2012 16:20     Subject: Re:I'm an African American. Ask me anything.
Anonymous wrote:

I agree 100% (also agree with your post preceding this one). Not sure why so many think we need "leaders". It's a bit insulting when you think about it.


I don't like Sharpton or Jackson, but I don't see a problem with a community having leaders. All communities do (and I'm talking about in all aspects of society, not just ethnicity-wise), I don't find it insulting. It's insulting when people ignorantly believe that prominent people of a group represent the thoughts of all people in that group, but there's nothing insulting about having "leaders," IMO.
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2012 16:19     Subject: Re:I'm an African American. Ask me anything.
Yes, makes complete sense. And thanks for responding (the other pps too, thanks). FWIW, we all have lunch together and often get into some major heated political debates. It looks like we all enjoy it and get something from it - but there does seem to be a lot of "holding back" or not as much of a robust debate when some black leaders are brought up - which is why I asked. But you make a lot of sense and I didn't think of it that way. Thanks.
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2012 16:18     Subject: I'm an African American. Ask me anything.
Anonymous wrote:
I agree. As an honor roll student, I was not teased. I also was and also continue to be down to earth and gregarious.


The only was I could have fit in would have been to get knocked up, speak broken English, and gleefully talk about the Ds and Fs on my report card.

If that's being "down to earth," then no, I wasn't.

Things are different in different areas.
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2012 16:17     Subject: Re:I'm an African American. Ask me anything.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Do you think that people like Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton perpetuate a racial divide to further their own agenda or purpose?




Not the Op, but YES, YES, YES and YES. Sharpton in particular.


pp, are you black? Just curious.

My answer: In some cases, yes. But I also think that Jackson and Sharpton did (and do) great work. They should not be discounted altogether.

-AA female


they bring issues to the forefront but they sometimes run around barking up the wrong tree sometimes which discredits the times they have something legit to argue about.

black guy here


I agree 100% (also agree with your post preceding this one). Not sure why so many think we need "leaders". It's a bit insulting when you think about it.
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2012 16:14     Subject: I'm an African American. Ask me anything.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If you were the only AA in a playground with your kids and I come over and say hi, would you think I'm weird?

Sometimes I see that in my neighborhood park and I want to say hi, but I'm not sure what response I would get.


black guy here.

ummmm no. real question is why are you afraid or hesitant to approach me? if i were your white neighbor, would you feel the same?

and im not trying to start anything so dont take my question as combative


I thought about it and I think it's just me. I didn't want to the mom to think I'm weird for just talking to her out of the blue. Here's the scenerio - crowded park, nannies sticking together, moms doing their own thing either with their kids or hanging out on the bench. Most moms don't talk to each other unless they know one another from outside the playground. There's only one AA mom there with her kids. I think I'd be singling her out if I go talk to her. I don't strike up conversations with other moms unless our kids toddle over to each other. I've seen the AA mom there only twice - once we were on our way out. Her kids are elementary school age, mine's a toddler. I thought about saying hi, but was afraid she'd be offended, wonder why I'm talking to her, or I don't know. Just writing this makes me see how silly it is. If she were white, I probably wouldn't think about talking to her at all.

I don't think your question is combative, but I think I'm digging myself into a deep hole. I'm off to the playground now. If I see her, I'll say hi. If she get's mad at me, I'll tell her this was your idea. (J/K)


I wouldn't feel I was being singled out if I were the AA mom on your playground.
ManHere
Post 03/08/2012 16:13     Subject: Re:I'm an African American. Ask me anything.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Do you think that people like Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton perpetuate a racial divide to further their own agenda or purpose?


black guy here. yes.

dont think we all line up with jesse and al when they get in an uproar cause thats not the case at all.

it doesnt give you the green light to go bashing them but just know that all of us dont fall in line to the idea that they are our "black leaders"


follow-up question - when a white person starts "bashing" them, do you automatically get defensive or think it's racist or do you try and hold a good debate/discussion with them about their merits or pitfalls (similar to holding a discussion with them about merits/pitfalls of GW Bush or Clinton)? I'm not trying to be argumentative here, but am genuinely curious since I sometimes feel that I can't have an honest good old fashioned political debate about some black leaders with black colleagues/friends the same way we (meaning me and the same colleagues/friends) have debates/arguments about white leaders. So, I'm asking for an honest answer about your reaction if someone you normally have really good, thoughtful and sometimes heated debates/arguments with about politics starts a similar debate about JJ or AS (or others). Exclude Pres. Obama from this, though, since in my experience, there is less defensiveness when I bring up things I don't like or agree with wrt Obama. I don't know why that is, though.

OP here. I don't get defensive but there is a difference. Having a debate about black leaders like Jesse and Al is different than having a debate about white leaders like Bush or Clinton. You used the term "white leaders" but they are actually leaders who happen to be white. They lead all of the citizens. Black leaders take up issues mainly concerning the black community so if you are having a debate with a black person, there is more sensitivity on their part and they might not feel that you can personally understand how the issue effects them. Kinda complicated but I hope you get what I'm saying.
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2012 16:13     Subject: Re:I'm an African American. Ask me anything.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Do you think that people like Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton perpetuate a racial divide to further their own agenda or purpose?


black guy here. yes.

dont think we all line up with jesse and al when they get in an uproar cause thats not the case at all.

it doesnt give you the green light to go bashing them but just know that all of us dont fall in line to the idea that they are our "black leaders"


follow-up question - when a white person starts "bashing" them, do you automatically get defensive or think it's racist or do you try and hold a good debate/discussion with them about their merits or pitfalls (similar to holding a discussion with them about merits/pitfalls of GW Bush or Clinton)? I'm not trying to be argumentative here, but am genuinely curious since I sometimes feel that I can't have an honest good old fashioned political debate about some black leaders with black colleagues/friends the same way we (meaning me and the same colleagues/friends) have debates/arguments about white leaders. So, I'm asking for an honest answer about your reaction if someone you normally have really good, thoughtful and sometimes heated debates/arguments with about politics starts a similar debate about JJ or AS (or others). Exclude Pres. Obama from this, though, since in my experience, there is less defensiveness when I bring up things I don't like or agree with wrt Obama. I don't know why that is, though.






if you decide to start your conversation with telling me al and jesse are crooks and this and that and basically throw me the typical boiler plate talking point i hear from some people, i dont care to engage in anything meaninful with you.

i equate it to you starting a conversation with me that obama is a muslim, wasnt born in america, and a socialist. if that is where you want to start the conversation, i completely dismiss you.

i have no problem with you disagreeing with al, jesse, obama, or anyone black who you think will cause me to start thinking you are racist because you and i may hold similar reservations about said person. you just hae to frame your argument correctly and not approach some of us with bullshit.

hope that helps a bit. thats why i said because i think jesse and al amount to little to me, doesnt give you free reign to think its ok to be frank. just know the time and place to do it.
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2012 16:09     Subject: I'm an African American. Ask me anything.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If you were the only AA in a playground with your kids and I come over and say hi, would you think I'm weird?

Sometimes I see that in my neighborhood park and I want to say hi, but I'm not sure what response I would get.


black guy here.

ummmm no. real question is why are you afraid or hesitant to approach me? if i were your white neighbor, would you feel the same?

and im not trying to start anything so dont take my question as combative


I thought about it and I think it's just me. I didn't want to the mom to think I'm weird for just talking to her out of the blue. Here's the scenerio - crowded park, nannies sticking together, moms doing their own thing either with their kids or hanging out on the bench. Most moms don't talk to each other unless they know one another from outside the playground. There's only one AA mom there with her kids. I think I'd be singling her out if I go talk to her. I don't strike up conversations with other moms unless our kids toddle over to each other. I've seen the AA mom there only twice - once we were on our way out. Her kids are elementary school age, mine's a toddler. I thought about saying hi, but was afraid she'd be offended, wonder why I'm talking to her, or I don't know. Just writing this makes me see how silly it is. If she were white, I probably wouldn't think about talking to her at all.

I don't think your question is combative, but I think I'm digging myself into a deep hole. I'm off to the playground now. If I see her, I'll say hi. If she get's mad at me, I'll tell her this was your idea. (J/K)
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2012 16:07     Subject: Re:I'm an African American. Ask me anything.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Do you think that people like Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton perpetuate a racial divide to further their own agenda or purpose?


black guy here. yes.

dont think we all line up with jesse and al when they get in an uproar cause thats not the case at all.

it doesnt give you the green light to go bashing them but just know that all of us dont fall in line to the idea that they are our "black leaders"


follow-up question - when a white person starts "bashing" them, do you automatically get defensive or think it's racist or do you try and hold a good debate/discussion with them about their merits or pitfalls (similar to holding a discussion with them about merits/pitfalls of GW Bush or Clinton)? I'm not trying to be argumentative here, but am genuinely curious since I sometimes feel that I can't have an honest good old fashioned political debate about some black leaders with black colleagues/friends the same way we (meaning me and the same colleagues/friends) have debates/arguments about white leaders. So, I'm asking for an honest answer about your reaction if someone you normally have really good, thoughtful and sometimes heated debates/arguments with about politics starts a similar debate about JJ or AS (or others). Exclude Pres. Obama from this, though, since in my experience, there is less defensiveness when I bring up things I don't like or agree with wrt Obama. I don't know why that is, though.



It depends. If the person starts withou something offensive (Sharpton is a total bafoon) then there is no more for a good debate. This actually happend to me with a now ex-friend. If there start off withou something like "I think Sharpton is wrong on xyz point", then we can have a discussion.
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2012 16:01     Subject: Re:I'm an African American. Ask me anything.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Do you think that people like Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton perpetuate a racial divide to further their own agenda or purpose?


black guy here. yes.

dont think we all line up with jesse and al when they get in an uproar cause thats not the case at all.

it doesnt give you the green light to go bashing them but just know that all of us dont fall in line to the idea that they are our "black leaders"


follow-up question - when a white person starts "bashing" them, do you automatically get defensive or think it's racist or do you try and hold a good debate/discussion with them about their merits or pitfalls (similar to holding a discussion with them about merits/pitfalls of GW Bush or Clinton)? I'm not trying to be argumentative here, but am genuinely curious since I sometimes feel that I can't have an honest good old fashioned political debate about some black leaders with black colleagues/friends the same way we (meaning me and the same colleagues/friends) have debates/arguments about white leaders. So, I'm asking for an honest answer about your reaction if someone you normally have really good, thoughtful and sometimes heated debates/arguments with about politics starts a similar debate about JJ or AS (or others). Exclude Pres. Obama from this, though, since in my experience, there is less defensiveness when I bring up things I don't like or agree with wrt Obama. I don't know why that is, though.
ManHere
Post 03/08/2012 15:57     Subject: I'm an African American. Ask me anything.
Anonymous wrote:
ManHere wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If you were the only AA in a playground with your kids and I come over and say hi, would you think I'm weird?

Sometimes I see that in my neighborhood park and I want to say hi, but I'm not sure what response I would get.

Of course say hi. If not for you, do it for the kids sake. Maybe they will become friends.
-OP


The mom I saw at the park had kids that were several years older than mine, so it might be kind of obvious that I'm just wanting to talk to her. Still, it's no reason not to say hi, so I will.

Good. I don't see how it's ever a bad thing to be obviously nice to your neighbors. Since the kids aren't the same age, maybe you might make a friend.
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2012 15:53     Subject: Re:I'm an African American. Ask me anything.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Do you think that people like Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton perpetuate a racial divide to further their own agenda or purpose?




Not the Op, but YES, YES, YES and YES. Sharpton in particular.


pp, are you black? Just curious.

My answer: In some cases, yes. But I also think that Jackson and Sharpton did (and do) great work. They should not be discounted altogether.

-AA female


they bring issues to the forefront but they sometimes run around barking up the wrong tree sometimes which discredits the times they have something legit to argue about.

black guy here
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2012 15:52     Subject: Re:I'm an African American. Ask me anything.
Anonymous wrote:Do you think that people like Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton perpetuate a racial divide to further their own agenda or purpose?


black guy here. yes.

dont think we all line up with jesse and al when they get in an uproar cause thats not the case at all.

it doesnt give you the green light to go bashing them but just know that all of us dont fall in line to the idea that they are our "black leaders"