Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone contributes to society, what's the difference between raising your children, caring for your parents and managing your household vs doing it for money as an employee?

For me it’s because once kids were in school there was not much “raising kids/caring for parents/managing household “ to do.

I’m always surprised when people say this. I don’t think that my day to day changed that much when my youngest went to school. I just didn’t have my little buddy with me anymore.

I guess I don’t go to the zoo as much, but it’s not like I was spending hours a day playing CandyLand with a four year old before he went to school.

You don't think your day to day changed when you arent responsible for a human for most of the day? That's a huge difference to me!

I’m still ultimately responsible for all of my kids every day.
But yeah, it isn’t that different.
Now I go go book club on Thursday mornings on my own. I don’t have to bring stickers.
When I fold laundry, I listen to an audiobook instead of his little stories, and I have to match the socks myself.
I usually make dinner on my own without my little helper. (There’s too much going on after school to cook then.).

I mostly kind of miss him.

Sounds like you don’t do much of anything.

She cooks and cleans and takes care of her children after school. That’s plenty.

DP here. I have 3 kids in 3 different schools. I basically have 5 hours from last kid drop off to first kid ending school. I work out, shower, run errands, cook, clean up, etc. There isn’t that much time left. I do meet up with a friend for lunch or go to the spa but it is like once per week.

Your time management skills are severely lacking. I guess it's good you don't have to work because it doesn't sound like you'd make it through a day.

So much hate! How do you know that her time management skills are lacking?

You’d put all three kids in the same school, right? Because you’re so brilliant, yeah? That actually sounds lazy to me. Maybe she’s chosen to make her life a little more difficult to put each kid at the best place for that child. She’s doing it because she can and she wants the best fit for all three.

For a third party like me, it’s obvious that you are seething with jealousy that you do not have the resources to send your kids to three different schools.

Ha, ok. My kids are at the private they all want to be at and we're very happy there. So yeah, I have the resources to send them wherever I want. So "obviously" you are wrong.

Someone who has five hours a day and who has no time left after working out, showering, running errands, cooking, and cleaning isn't good at managing their time. You realize that many people do all those things in far less than five hours, right? Again, good thing she doesn't have too much on her plate.

I’m guessing that the PP’s schedule looks something like this:

Workout = 1 hour

Half and hour doesn’t cut it for a decent workout.

Shower + make up/dressing = 1/2 hour

If you spend less time, you look disheveled, no matter what. You especially need to blowdry your hair.

Errands = 1 hour

With traffic it’s going to take you an hour to go to the grocery store, the post office, or to drop off unsuccessful on-line purchases at Fed Ex/UPS. Maybe you can do it faster, but that’s how the traffic is where I am.

Cleaning = 2 hours

If you have a 4,000 to 6,000 square foot house with five bathrooms, it’s going to take about two hours a day of maintenance to keep it decent.

Cooking = 1 hour

If you’re preparing healthy meals with lots of vegetables, it takes a lot of time to clean them and chop them up, properly.

I’ve already gone over the five hours here. But I’ll assume some days PP, won’t have errands and that you’ll tell me how good you can make yourself look in under ten minutes. Or how you can chop vegetables in five. I get it. But it looks to me like PP really doesn’t have that much extra time if she’s doing all the things she has to do.

What’s your abbreviated timeline for completing these tasks?

This is an example of poor time management

Right? Meal prep. And are you cleaning your bathrooms every day? How many packages do you need to return? No one's saying you can't fill up as many hours as you need to fill, but come on.

Yes, I clean my bathrooms every day. Every single day. With three small children they get dirty fast. From reading this thread I’ve come to the conclusion that not everyone has the same standards. We pick and choose what matters to us, in addition to heavily judging those who have different standards. Men don’t do this to each other. This is why women will always be the second sex. We’re the problem.

Try having your husband tell his friends he cleans five bathrooms every day and see how that goes. You don't think they're going to have anything to say about that, really?

Most men don’t care if their acquaintance has a string of lovers on the side, do you really think they’ll care about him cleaning his bathrooms everyday? Men aren’t in each others business like that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ll never understand the daily errands thing

Neither do I. I manage to work FT, volunteer at the school, run kids to activities, feed everyone healthy meals, ensure homework is complete and emotional needs met, work out 7+ hours a week, have a nice house and lawn, and maintain a social life. The key is to not do it alone. I have a spouse, kids do chores, and outsource where needed.

I would flip the question - if you can have and do it all, why wouldn't you?

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone contributes to society, what's the difference between raising your children, caring for your parents and managing your household vs doing it for money as an employee?

For me it’s because once kids were in school there was not much “raising kids/caring for parents/managing household “ to do.

I’m always surprised when people say this. I don’t think that my day to day changed that much when my youngest went to school. I just didn’t have my little buddy with me anymore.

I guess I don’t go to the zoo as much, but it’s not like I was spending hours a day playing CandyLand with a four year old before he went to school.

You don't think your day to day changed when you arent responsible for a human for most of the day? That's a huge difference to me!

I’m still ultimately responsible for all of my kids every day.
But yeah, it isn’t that different.
Now I go go book club on Thursday mornings on my own. I don’t have to bring stickers.
When I fold laundry, I listen to an audiobook instead of his little stories, and I have to match the socks myself.
I usually make dinner on my own without my little helper. (There’s too much going on after school to cook then.).

I mostly kind of miss him.

Sounds like you don’t do much of anything.

She cooks and cleans and takes care of her children after school. That’s plenty.

DP here. I have 3 kids in 3 different schools. I basically have 5 hours from last kid drop off to first kid ending school. I work out, shower, run errands, cook, clean up, etc. There isn’t that much time left. I do meet up with a friend for lunch or go to the spa but it is like once per week.

Your time management skills are severely lacking. I guess it's good you don't have to work because it doesn't sound like you'd make it through a day.

So much hate! How do you know that her time management skills are lacking?

You’d put all three kids in the same school, right? Because you’re so brilliant, yeah? That actually sounds lazy to me. Maybe she’s chosen to make her life a little more difficult to put each kid at the best place for that child. She’s doing it because she can and she wants the best fit for all three.

For a third party like me, it’s obvious that you are seething with jealousy that you do not have the resources to send your kids to three different schools.

Ha, ok. My kids are at the private they all want to be at and we're very happy there. So yeah, I have the resources to send them wherever I want. So "obviously" you are wrong.

Someone who has five hours a day and who has no time left after working out, showering, running errands, cooking, and cleaning isn't good at managing their time. You realize that many people do all those things in far less than five hours, right? Again, good thing she doesn't have too much on her plate.

I’m guessing that the PP’s schedule looks something like this:

Workout = 1 hour

Half and hour doesn’t cut it for a decent workout.

Shower + make up/dressing = 1/2 hour

If you spend less time, you look disheveled, no matter what. You especially need to blowdry your hair.

Errands = 1 hour

With traffic it’s going to take you an hour to go to the grocery store, the post office, or to drop off unsuccessful on-line purchases at Fed Ex/UPS. Maybe you can do it faster, but that’s how the traffic is where I am.

Cleaning = 2 hours

If you have a 4,000 to 6,000 square foot house with five bathrooms, it’s going to take about two hours a day of maintenance to keep it decent.

Cooking = 1 hour

If you’re preparing healthy meals with lots of vegetables, it takes a lot of time to clean them and chop them up, properly.

I’ve already gone over the five hours here. But I’ll assume some days PP, won’t have errands and that you’ll tell me how good you can make yourself look in under ten minutes. Or how you can chop vegetables in five. I get it. But it looks to me like PP really doesn’t have that much extra time if she’s doing all the things she has to do.

What’s your abbreviated timeline for completing these tasks?

This is an example of poor time management

Right? Meal prep. And are you cleaning your bathrooms every day? How many packages do you need to return? No one's saying you can't fill up as many hours as you need to fill, but come on.

Yes, I clean my bathrooms every day. Every single day. With three small children they get dirty fast. From reading this thread I’ve come to the conclusion that not everyone has the same standards. We pick and choose what matters to us, in addition to heavily judging those who have different standards. Men don’t do this to each other. This is why women will always be the second sex. We’re the problem.

No one is responding negatively to you saying "yeah, I have leisure time and it's great." Own that if you want to own it. It's the elaborate justifications of how surely women with jobs have messy hair and messy houses, and also how their jobs aren't actually important.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone contributes to society, what's the difference between raising your children, caring for your parents and managing your household vs doing it for money as an employee?

For me it’s because once kids were in school there was not much “raising kids/caring for parents/managing household “ to do.

I’m always surprised when people say this. I don’t think that my day to day changed that much when my youngest went to school. I just didn’t have my little buddy with me anymore.

I guess I don’t go to the zoo as much, but it’s not like I was spending hours a day playing CandyLand with a four year old before he went to school.

You don't think your day to day changed when you arent responsible for a human for most of the day? That's a huge difference to me!

I’m still ultimately responsible for all of my kids every day.
But yeah, it isn’t that different.
Now I go go book club on Thursday mornings on my own. I don’t have to bring stickers.
When I fold laundry, I listen to an audiobook instead of his little stories, and I have to match the socks myself.
I usually make dinner on my own without my little helper. (There’s too much going on after school to cook then.).

I mostly kind of miss him.

Sounds like you don’t do much of anything.

She cooks and cleans and takes care of her children after school. That’s plenty.

DP here. I have 3 kids in 3 different schools. I basically have 5 hours from last kid drop off to first kid ending school. I work out, shower, run errands, cook, clean up, etc. There isn’t that much time left. I do meet up with a friend for lunch or go to the spa but it is like once per week.

Your time management skills are severely lacking. I guess it's good you don't have to work because it doesn't sound like you'd make it through a day.

So much hate! How do you know that her time management skills are lacking?

You’d put all three kids in the same school, right? Because you’re so brilliant, yeah? That actually sounds lazy to me. Maybe she’s chosen to make her life a little more difficult to put each kid at the best place for that child. She’s doing it because she can and she wants the best fit for all three.

For a third party like me, it’s obvious that you are seething with jealousy that you do not have the resources to send your kids to three different schools.

Ha, ok. My kids are at the private they all want to be at and we're very happy there. So yeah, I have the resources to send them wherever I want. So "obviously" you are wrong.

Someone who has five hours a day and who has no time left after working out, showering, running errands, cooking, and cleaning isn't good at managing their time. You realize that many people do all those things in far less than five hours, right? Again, good thing she doesn't have too much on her plate.

I’m guessing that the PP’s schedule looks something like this:

Workout = 1 hour

Half and hour doesn’t cut it for a decent workout.

Shower + make up/dressing = 1/2 hour

If you spend less time, you look disheveled, no matter what. You especially need to blowdry your hair.

Errands = 1 hour

With traffic it’s going to take you an hour to go to the grocery store, the post office, or to drop off unsuccessful on-line purchases at Fed Ex/UPS. Maybe you can do it faster, but that’s how the traffic is where I am.

Cleaning = 2 hours

If you have a 4,000 to 6,000 square foot house with five bathrooms, it’s going to take about two hours a day of maintenance to keep it decent.

Cooking = 1 hour

If you’re preparing healthy meals with lots of vegetables, it takes a lot of time to clean them and chop them up, properly.

I’ve already gone over the five hours here. But I’ll assume some days PP, won’t have errands and that you’ll tell me how good you can make yourself look in under ten minutes. Or how you can chop vegetables in five. I get it. But it looks to me like PP really doesn’t have that much extra time if she’s doing all the things she has to do.

What’s your abbreviated timeline for completing these tasks?

This is an example of poor time management

Right? Meal prep. And are you cleaning your bathrooms every day? How many packages do you need to return? No one's saying you can't fill up as many hours as you need to fill, but come on.

Yes, I clean my bathrooms every day. Every single day. With three small children they get dirty fast. From reading this thread I’ve come to the conclusion that not everyone has the same standards. We pick and choose what matters to us, in addition to heavily judging those who have different standards. Men don’t do this to each other. This is why women will always be the second sex. We’re the problem.

Try having your husband tell his friends he cleans five bathrooms every day and see how that goes. You don't think they're going to have anything to say about that, really?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone contributes to society, what's the difference between raising your children, caring for your parents and managing your household vs doing it for money as an employee?

For me it’s because once kids were in school there was not much “raising kids/caring for parents/managing household “ to do.

I’m always surprised when people say this. I don’t think that my day to day changed that much when my youngest went to school. I just didn’t have my little buddy with me anymore.

I guess I don’t go to the zoo as much, but it’s not like I was spending hours a day playing CandyLand with a four year old before he went to school.

You don't think your day to day changed when you arent responsible for a human for most of the day? That's a huge difference to me!

I’m still ultimately responsible for all of my kids every day.
But yeah, it isn’t that different.
Now I go go book club on Thursday mornings on my own. I don’t have to bring stickers.
When I fold laundry, I listen to an audiobook instead of his little stories, and I have to match the socks myself.
I usually make dinner on my own without my little helper. (There’s too much going on after school to cook then.).

I mostly kind of miss him.

Sounds like you don’t do much of anything.

She cooks and cleans and takes care of her children after school. That’s plenty.

DP here. I have 3 kids in 3 different schools. I basically have 5 hours from last kid drop off to first kid ending school. I work out, shower, run errands, cook, clean up, etc. There isn’t that much time left. I do meet up with a friend for lunch or go to the spa but it is like once per week.

Your time management skills are severely lacking. I guess it's good you don't have to work because it doesn't sound like you'd make it through a day.

So much hate! How do you know that her time management skills are lacking?

You’d put all three kids in the same school, right? Because you’re so brilliant, yeah? That actually sounds lazy to me. Maybe she’s chosen to make her life a little more difficult to put each kid at the best place for that child. She’s doing it because she can and she wants the best fit for all three.

For a third party like me, it’s obvious that you are seething with jealousy that you do not have the resources to send your kids to three different schools.

Ha, ok. My kids are at the private they all want to be at and we're very happy there. So yeah, I have the resources to send them wherever I want. So "obviously" you are wrong.

Someone who has five hours a day and who has no time left after working out, showering, running errands, cooking, and cleaning isn't good at managing their time. You realize that many people do all those things in far less than five hours, right? Again, good thing she doesn't have too much on her plate.

I’m guessing that the PP’s schedule looks something like this:

Workout = 1 hour

Half and hour doesn’t cut it for a decent workout.

Shower + make up/dressing = 1/2 hour

If you spend less time, you look disheveled, no matter what. You especially need to blowdry your hair.

Errands = 1 hour

With traffic it’s going to take you an hour to go to the grocery store, the post office, or to drop off unsuccessful on-line purchases at Fed Ex/UPS. Maybe you can do it faster, but that’s how the traffic is where I am.

Cleaning = 2 hours

If you have a 4,000 to 6,000 square foot house with five bathrooms, it’s going to take about two hours a day of maintenance to keep it decent.

Cooking = 1 hour

If you’re preparing healthy meals with lots of vegetables, it takes a lot of time to clean them and chop them up, properly.

I’ve already gone over the five hours here. But I’ll assume some days PP, won’t have errands and that you’ll tell me how good you can make yourself look in under ten minutes. Or how you can chop vegetables in five. I get it. But it looks to me like PP really doesn’t have that much extra time if she’s doing all the things she has to do.

What’s your abbreviated timeline for completing these tasks?

This is an example of poor time management

Right? Meal prep. And are you cleaning your bathrooms every day? How many packages do you need to return? No one's saying you can't fill up as many hours as you need to fill, but come on.

Yes, I clean my bathrooms every day. Every single day. With three small children they get dirty fast. From reading this thread I’ve come to the conclusion that not everyone has the same standards. We pick and choose what matters to us, in addition to heavily judging those who have different standards. Men don’t do this to each other. This is why women will always be the second sex. We’re the problem.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ll never understand the daily errands thing

Neither do I. I manage to work FT, volunteer at the school, run kids to activities, feed everyone healthy meals, ensure homework is complete and emotional needs met, work out 7+ hours a week, have a nice house and lawn, and maintain a social life. The key is to not do it alone. I have a spouse, kids do chores, and outsource where needed.

I would flip the question - if you can have and do it all, why wouldn't you?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone contributes to society, what's the difference between raising your children, caring for your parents and managing your household vs doing it for money as an employee?

For me it’s because once kids were in school there was not much “raising kids/caring for parents/managing household “ to do.

I’m always surprised when people say this. I don’t think that my day to day changed that much when my youngest went to school. I just didn’t have my little buddy with me anymore.

I guess I don’t go to the zoo as much, but it’s not like I was spending hours a day playing CandyLand with a four year old before he went to school.

You don't think your day to day changed when you arent responsible for a human for most of the day? That's a huge difference to me!

I’m still ultimately responsible for all of my kids every day.
But yeah, it isn’t that different.
Now I go go book club on Thursday mornings on my own. I don’t have to bring stickers.
When I fold laundry, I listen to an audiobook instead of his little stories, and I have to match the socks myself.
I usually make dinner on my own without my little helper. (There’s too much going on after school to cook then.).

I mostly kind of miss him.

Sounds like you don’t do much of anything.

She cooks and cleans and takes care of her children after school. That’s plenty.

DP here. I have 3 kids in 3 different schools. I basically have 5 hours from last kid drop off to first kid ending school. I work out, shower, run errands, cook, clean up, etc. There isn’t that much time left. I do meet up with a friend for lunch or go to the spa but it is like once per week.

Your time management skills are severely lacking. I guess it's good you don't have to work because it doesn't sound like you'd make it through a day.

So much hate! How do you know that her time management skills are lacking?

You’d put all three kids in the same school, right? Because you’re so brilliant, yeah? That actually sounds lazy to me. Maybe she’s chosen to make her life a little more difficult to put each kid at the best place for that child. She’s doing it because she can and she wants the best fit for all three.

For a third party like me, it’s obvious that you are seething with jealousy that you do not have the resources to send your kids to three different schools.

Ha, ok. My kids are at the private they all want to be at and we're very happy there. So yeah, I have the resources to send them wherever I want. So "obviously" you are wrong.

Someone who has five hours a day and who has no time left after working out, showering, running errands, cooking, and cleaning isn't good at managing their time. You realize that many people do all those things in far less than five hours, right? Again, good thing she doesn't have too much on her plate.

I’m guessing that the PP’s schedule looks something like this:

Workout = 1 hour

Half and hour doesn’t cut it for a decent workout.

Shower + make up/dressing = 1/2 hour

If you spend less time, you look disheveled, no matter what. You especially need to blowdry your hair.

Errands = 1 hour

With traffic it’s going to take you an hour to go to the grocery store, the post office, or to drop off unsuccessful on-line purchases at Fed Ex/UPS. Maybe you can do it faster, but that’s how the traffic is where I am.

Cleaning = 2 hours

If you have a 4,000 to 6,000 square foot house with five bathrooms, it’s going to take about two hours a day of maintenance to keep it decent.

Cooking = 1 hour

If you’re preparing healthy meals with lots of vegetables, it takes a lot of time to clean them and chop them up, properly.

I’ve already gone over the five hours here. But I’ll assume some days PP, won’t have errands and that you’ll tell me how good you can make yourself look in under ten minutes. Or how you can chop vegetables in five. I get it. But it looks to me like PP really doesn’t have that much extra time if she’s doing all the things she has to do.

What’s your abbreviated timeline for completing these tasks?

This is an example of poor time management

Right? Meal prep. And are you cleaning your bathrooms every day? How many packages do you need to return? No one's saying you can't fill up as many hours as you need to fill, but come on.

Yes, I clean my bathrooms every day. Every single day. With three small children they get dirty fast. From reading this thread I’ve come to the conclusion that not everyone has the same standards. We pick and choose what matters to us, in addition to heavily judging those who have different standards. Men don’t do this to each other. This is why women will always be the second sex. We’re the problem.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone contributes to society, what's the difference between raising your children, caring for your parents and managing your household vs doing it for money as an employee?

For me it’s because once kids were in school there was not much “raising kids/caring for parents/managing household “ to do.

I’m always surprised when people say this. I don’t think that my day to day changed that much when my youngest went to school. I just didn’t have my little buddy with me anymore.

I guess I don’t go to the zoo as much, but it’s not like I was spending hours a day playing CandyLand with a four year old before he went to school.

You don't think your day to day changed when you arent responsible for a human for most of the day? That's a huge difference to me!

I’m still ultimately responsible for all of my kids every day.
But yeah, it isn’t that different.
Now I go go book club on Thursday mornings on my own. I don’t have to bring stickers.
When I fold laundry, I listen to an audiobook instead of his little stories, and I have to match the socks myself.
I usually make dinner on my own without my little helper. (There’s too much going on after school to cook then.).

I mostly kind of miss him.

Sounds like you don’t do much of anything.

She cooks and cleans and takes care of her children after school. That’s plenty.

DP here. I have 3 kids in 3 different schools. I basically have 5 hours from last kid drop off to first kid ending school. I work out, shower, run errands, cook, clean up, etc. There isn’t that much time left. I do meet up with a friend for lunch or go to the spa but it is like once per week.

Your time management skills are severely lacking. I guess it's good you don't have to work because it doesn't sound like you'd make it through a day.

So much hate! How do you know that her time management skills are lacking?

You’d put all three kids in the same school, right? Because you’re so brilliant, yeah? That actually sounds lazy to me. Maybe she’s chosen to make her life a little more difficult to put each kid at the best place for that child. She’s doing it because she can and she wants the best fit for all three.

For a third party like me, it’s obvious that you are seething with jealousy that you do not have the resources to send your kids to three different schools.

Ha, ok. My kids are at the private they all want to be at and we're very happy there. So yeah, I have the resources to send them wherever I want. So "obviously" you are wrong.

Someone who has five hours a day and who has no time left after working out, showering, running errands, cooking, and cleaning isn't good at managing their time. You realize that many people do all those things in far less than five hours, right? Again, good thing she doesn't have too much on her plate.

I guess you are attacking me and my five hours. I am a high functioning person. I spent most of my life achieving. I have two masters, one from Harvard. I was ambitious and careeer oriented. My entire identity was with my achievements and I did achieve. Then I had children and I hated being at work. I wanted to be with my child. I mommy tracked and had another kid. I had a nanny. I was able to juggle work and kids but I did not feel like I spent enough time with my children. Those years when they were young are gone.

I used to make a lot of money while making money for others. DH also makes a lot of money. He makes a few million per year. While I stopped working before I hit seven figures, I earned high six figures. We don’t need both of us out there earning all this money.

I consider myself retired. I have my own money. I have family money. We have marital assets. The last thing I need to do is go out and get a job just to have a job. I certainly don’t need to get a job to prove to some internet strangers that I can manage my time.

F×<! yeah, I'd be retired too! I don't understand why you're here justifying yourself in this low brow thread though

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone contributes to society, what's the difference between raising your children, caring for your parents and managing your household vs doing it for money as an employee?

For me it’s because once kids were in school there was not much “raising kids/caring for parents/managing household “ to do.

I’m always surprised when people say this. I don’t think that my day to day changed that much when my youngest went to school. I just didn’t have my little buddy with me anymore.

I guess I don’t go to the zoo as much, but it’s not like I was spending hours a day playing CandyLand with a four year old before he went to school.

You don't think your day to day changed when you arent responsible for a human for most of the day? That's a huge difference to me!

I’m still ultimately responsible for all of my kids every day.
But yeah, it isn’t that different.
Now I go go book club on Thursday mornings on my own. I don’t have to bring stickers.
When I fold laundry, I listen to an audiobook instead of his little stories, and I have to match the socks myself.
I usually make dinner on my own without my little helper. (There’s too much going on after school to cook then.).

I mostly kind of miss him.

Sounds like you don’t do much of anything.

She cooks and cleans and takes care of her children after school. That’s plenty.

DP here. I have 3 kids in 3 different schools. I basically have 5 hours from last kid drop off to first kid ending school. I work out, shower, run errands, cook, clean up, etc. There isn’t that much time left. I do meet up with a friend for lunch or go to the spa but it is like once per week.

Your time management skills are severely lacking. I guess it's good you don't have to work because it doesn't sound like you'd make it through a day.

So much hate! How do you know that her time management skills are lacking?

You’d put all three kids in the same school, right? Because you’re so brilliant, yeah? That actually sounds lazy to me. Maybe she’s chosen to make her life a little more difficult to put each kid at the best place for that child. She’s doing it because she can and she wants the best fit for all three.

For a third party like me, it’s obvious that you are seething with jealousy that you do not have the resources to send your kids to three different schools.

Ha, ok. My kids are at the private they all want to be at and we're very happy there. So yeah, I have the resources to send them wherever I want. So "obviously" you are wrong.

Someone who has five hours a day and who has no time left after working out, showering, running errands, cooking, and cleaning isn't good at managing their time. You realize that many people do all those things in far less than five hours, right? Again, good thing she doesn't have too much on her plate.

I guess you are attacking me and my five hours. I am a high functioning person. I spent most of my life achieving. I have two masters, one from Harvard. I was ambitious and careeer oriented. My entire identity was with my achievements and I did achieve. Then I had children and I hated being at work. I wanted to be with my child. I mommy tracked and had another kid. I had a nanny. I was able to juggle work and kids but I did not feel like I spent enough time with my children. Those years when they were young are gone.

I used to make a lot of money while making money for others. DH also makes a lot of money. He makes a few million per year. While I stopped working before I hit seven figures, I earned high six figures. We don’t need both of us out there earning all this money.

I consider myself retired. I have my own money. I have family money. We have marital assets. The last thing I need to do is go out and get a job just to have a job. I certainly don’t need to get a job to prove to some internet strangers that I can manage my time.

DP
I couldn't get through your post because I was laughing too hard. Are you really trying to convince anonymously that you have 2 masters and a degree from Harvard?!?!? I mean I don't care about your choice to stay home or not, but your post doesn't read Harvard grad. Maybe you should get back out there and sharpen the saw, because you sound dumb and defensive. Alternatively just own where you are and stop defending yourself with lies.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone contributes to society, what's the difference between raising your children, caring for your parents and managing your household vs doing it for money as an employee?

For me it’s because once kids were in school there was not much “raising kids/caring for parents/managing household “ to do.

I’m always surprised when people say this. I don’t think that my day to day changed that much when my youngest went to school. I just didn’t have my little buddy with me anymore.

I guess I don’t go to the zoo as much, but it’s not like I was spending hours a day playing CandyLand with a four year old before he went to school.

You don't think your day to day changed when you arent responsible for a human for most of the day? That's a huge difference to me!

I’m still ultimately responsible for all of my kids every day.
But yeah, it isn’t that different.
Now I go go book club on Thursday mornings on my own. I don’t have to bring stickers.
When I fold laundry, I listen to an audiobook instead of his little stories, and I have to match the socks myself.
I usually make dinner on my own without my little helper. (There’s too much going on after school to cook then.).

I mostly kind of miss him.

Sounds like you don’t do much of anything.

She cooks and cleans and takes care of her children after school. That’s plenty.

DP here. I have 3 kids in 3 different schools. I basically have 5 hours from last kid drop off to first kid ending school. I work out, shower, run errands, cook, clean up, etc. There isn’t that much time left. I do meet up with a friend for lunch or go to the spa but it is like once per week.

Your time management skills are severely lacking. I guess it's good you don't have to work because it doesn't sound like you'd make it through a day.

So much hate! How do you know that her time management skills are lacking?

You’d put all three kids in the same school, right? Because you’re so brilliant, yeah? That actually sounds lazy to me. Maybe she’s chosen to make her life a little more difficult to put each kid at the best place for that child. She’s doing it because she can and she wants the best fit for all three.

For a third party like me, it’s obvious that you are seething with jealousy that you do not have the resources to send your kids to three different schools.

Ha, ok. My kids are at the private they all want to be at and we're very happy there. So yeah, I have the resources to send them wherever I want. So "obviously" you are wrong.

Someone who has five hours a day and who has no time left after working out, showering, running errands, cooking, and cleaning isn't good at managing their time. You realize that many people do all those things in far less than five hours, right? Again, good thing she doesn't have too much on her plate.

I’m guessing that the PP’s schedule looks something like this:

Workout = 1 hour

Half and hour doesn’t cut it for a decent workout.

Shower + make up/dressing = 1/2 hour

If you spend less time, you look disheveled, no matter what. You especially need to blowdry your hair.

Errands = 1 hour

With traffic it’s going to take you an hour to go to the grocery store, the post office, or to drop off unsuccessful on-line purchases at Fed Ex/UPS. Maybe you can do it faster, but that’s how the traffic is where I am.

Cleaning = 2 hours

If you have a 4,000 to 6,000 square foot house with five bathrooms, it’s going to take about two hours a day of maintenance to keep it decent.

Cooking = 1 hour

If you’re preparing healthy meals with lots of vegetables, it takes a lot of time to clean them and chop them up, properly.

I’ve already gone over the five hours here. But I’ll assume some days PP, won’t have errands and that you’ll tell me how good you can make yourself look in under ten minutes. Or how you can chop vegetables in five. I get it. But it looks to me like PP really doesn’t have that much extra time if she’s doing all the things she has to do.

What’s your abbreviated timeline for completing these tasks?

This is an example of poor time management

Right? Meal prep. And are you cleaning your bathrooms every day? How many packages do you need to return? No one's saying you can't fill up as many hours as you need to fill, but come on.

Yes, I clean my bathrooms every day. Every single day. With three small children they get dirty fast. From reading this thread I’ve come to the conclusion that not everyone has the same standards. We pick and choose what matters to us, in addition to heavily judging those who have different standards. Men don’t do this to each other. This is why women will always be the second sex. We’re the problem.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone contributes to society, what's the difference between raising your children, caring for your parents and managing your household vs doing it for money as an employee?

For me it’s because once kids were in school there was not much “raising kids/caring for parents/managing household “ to do.

I’m always surprised when people say this. I don’t think that my day to day changed that much when my youngest went to school. I just didn’t have my little buddy with me anymore.

I guess I don’t go to the zoo as much, but it’s not like I was spending hours a day playing CandyLand with a four year old before he went to school.

You don't think your day to day changed when you arent responsible for a human for most of the day? That's a huge difference to me!

I’m still ultimately responsible for all of my kids every day.
But yeah, it isn’t that different.
Now I go go book club on Thursday mornings on my own. I don’t have to bring stickers.
When I fold laundry, I listen to an audiobook instead of his little stories, and I have to match the socks myself.
I usually make dinner on my own without my little helper. (There’s too much going on after school to cook then.).

I mostly kind of miss him.

Sounds like you don’t do much of anything.

She cooks and cleans and takes care of her children after school. That’s plenty.

DP here. I have 3 kids in 3 different schools. I basically have 5 hours from last kid drop off to first kid ending school. I work out, shower, run errands, cook, clean up, etc. There isn’t that much time left. I do meet up with a friend for lunch or go to the spa but it is like once per week.

Your time management skills are severely lacking. I guess it's good you don't have to work because it doesn't sound like you'd make it through a day.

So much hate! How do you know that her time management skills are lacking?

You’d put all three kids in the same school, right? Because you’re so brilliant, yeah? That actually sounds lazy to me. Maybe she’s chosen to make her life a little more difficult to put each kid at the best place for that child. She’s doing it because she can and she wants the best fit for all three.

For a third party like me, it’s obvious that you are seething with jealousy that you do not have the resources to send your kids to three different schools.

Ha, ok. My kids are at the private they all want to be at and we're very happy there. So yeah, I have the resources to send them wherever I want. So "obviously" you are wrong.

Someone who has five hours a day and who has no time left after working out, showering, running errands, cooking, and cleaning isn't good at managing their time. You realize that many people do all those things in far less than five hours, right? Again, good thing she doesn't have too much on her plate.

I’m guessing that the PP’s schedule looks something like this:

Workout = 1 hour

Half and hour doesn’t cut it for a decent workout.

Shower + make up/dressing = 1/2 hour

If you spend less time, you look disheveled, no matter what. You especially need to blowdry your hair.

Errands = 1 hour

With traffic it’s going to take you an hour to go to the grocery store, the post office, or to drop off unsuccessful on-line purchases at Fed Ex/UPS. Maybe you can do it faster, but that’s how the traffic is where I am.

Cleaning = 2 hours

If you have a 4,000 to 6,000 square foot house with five bathrooms, it’s going to take about two hours a day of maintenance to keep it decent.

Cooking = 1 hour

If you’re preparing healthy meals with lots of vegetables, it takes a lot of time to clean them and chop them up, properly.

I’ve already gone over the five hours here. But I’ll assume some days PP, won’t have errands and that you’ll tell me how good you can make yourself look in under ten minutes. Or how you can chop vegetables in five. I get it. But it looks to me like PP really doesn’t have that much extra time if she’s doing all the things she has to do.

What’s your abbreviated timeline for completing these tasks?

This is an example of poor time management

Right? Meal prep. And are you cleaning your bathrooms every day? How many packages do you need to return? No one's saying you can't fill up as many hours as you need to fill, but come on.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone contributes to society, what's the difference between raising your children, caring for your parents and managing your household vs doing it for money as an employee?

For me it’s because once kids were in school there was not much “raising kids/caring for parents/managing household “ to do.

I’m always surprised when people say this. I don’t think that my day to day changed that much when my youngest went to school. I just didn’t have my little buddy with me anymore.

I guess I don’t go to the zoo as much, but it’s not like I was spending hours a day playing CandyLand with a four year old before he went to school.

You don't think your day to day changed when you arent responsible for a human for most of the day? That's a huge difference to me!

I’m still ultimately responsible for all of my kids every day.
But yeah, it isn’t that different.
Now I go go book club on Thursday mornings on my own. I don’t have to bring stickers.
When I fold laundry, I listen to an audiobook instead of his little stories, and I have to match the socks myself.
I usually make dinner on my own without my little helper. (There’s too much going on after school to cook then.).

I mostly kind of miss him.

Sounds like you don’t do much of anything.

She cooks and cleans and takes care of her children after school. That’s plenty.

DP here. I have 3 kids in 3 different schools. I basically have 5 hours from last kid drop off to first kid ending school. I work out, shower, run errands, cook, clean up, etc. There isn’t that much time left. I do meet up with a friend for lunch or go to the spa but it is like once per week.

Your time management skills are severely lacking. I guess it's good you don't have to work because it doesn't sound like you'd make it through a day.

So much hate! How do you know that her time management skills are lacking?

You’d put all three kids in the same school, right? Because you’re so brilliant, yeah? That actually sounds lazy to me. Maybe she’s chosen to make her life a little more difficult to put each kid at the best place for that child. She’s doing it because she can and she wants the best fit for all three.

For a third party like me, it’s obvious that you are seething with jealousy that you do not have the resources to send your kids to three different schools.

Ha, ok. My kids are at the private they all want to be at and we're very happy there. So yeah, I have the resources to send them wherever I want. So "obviously" you are wrong.

Someone who has five hours a day and who has no time left after working out, showering, running errands, cooking, and cleaning isn't good at managing their time. You realize that many people do all those things in far less than five hours, right? Again, good thing she doesn't have too much on her plate.

I guess you are attacking me and my five hours. I am a high functioning person. I spent most of my life achieving. I have two masters, one from Harvard. I was ambitious and careeer oriented. My entire identity was with my achievements and I did achieve. Then I had children and I hated being at work. I wanted to be with my child. I mommy tracked and had another kid. I had a nanny. I was able to juggle work and kids but I did not feel like I spent enough time with my children. Those years when they were young are gone.

I used to make a lot of money while making money for others. DH also makes a lot of money. He makes a few million per year. While I stopped working before I hit seven figures, I earned high six figures. We don’t need both of us out there earning all this money.

I consider myself retired. I have my own money. I have family money. We have marital assets. The last thing I need to do is go out and get a job just to have a job. I certainly don’t need to get a job to prove to some internet strangers that I can manage my time.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone contributes to society, what's the difference between raising your children, caring for your parents and managing your household vs doing it for money as an employee?

For me it’s because once kids were in school there was not much “raising kids/caring for parents/managing household “ to do.

I’m always surprised when people say this. I don’t think that my day to day changed that much when my youngest went to school. I just didn’t have my little buddy with me anymore.

I guess I don’t go to the zoo as much, but it’s not like I was spending hours a day playing CandyLand with a four year old before he went to school.

You don't think your day to day changed when you arent responsible for a human for most of the day? That's a huge difference to me!

I’m still ultimately responsible for all of my kids every day.
But yeah, it isn’t that different.
Now I go go book club on Thursday mornings on my own. I don’t have to bring stickers.
When I fold laundry, I listen to an audiobook instead of his little stories, and I have to match the socks myself.
I usually make dinner on my own without my little helper. (There’s too much going on after school to cook then.).

I mostly kind of miss him.

Sounds like you don’t do much of anything.

She cooks and cleans and takes care of her children after school. That’s plenty.

DP here. I have 3 kids in 3 different schools. I basically have 5 hours from last kid drop off to first kid ending school. I work out, shower, run errands, cook, clean up, etc. There isn’t that much time left. I do meet up with a friend for lunch or go to the spa but it is like once per week.

Your time management skills are severely lacking. I guess it's good you don't have to work because it doesn't sound like you'd make it through a day.

So much hate! How do you know that her time management skills are lacking?

You’d put all three kids in the same school, right? Because you’re so brilliant, yeah? That actually sounds lazy to me. Maybe she’s chosen to make her life a little more difficult to put each kid at the best place for that child. She’s doing it because she can and she wants the best fit for all three.

For a third party like me, it’s obvious that you are seething with jealousy that you do not have the resources to send your kids to three different schools.

Ha, ok. My kids are at the private they all want to be at and we're very happy there. So yeah, I have the resources to send them wherever I want. So "obviously" you are wrong.

Someone who has five hours a day and who has no time left after working out, showering, running errands, cooking, and cleaning isn't good at managing their time. You realize that many people do all those things in far less than five hours, right? Again, good thing she doesn't have too much on her plate.

I guess you are attacking me and my five hours. I am a high functioning person. I spent most of my life achieving. I have two masters, one from Harvard. I was ambitious and careeer oriented. My entire identity was with my achievements and I did achieve. Then I had children and I hated being at work. I wanted to be with my child. I mommy tracked and had another kid. I had a nanny. I was able to juggle work and kids but I did not feel like I spent enough time with my children. Those years when they were young are gone.

I used to make a lot of money while making money for others. DH also makes a lot of money. He makes a few million per year. While I stopped working before I hit seven figures, I earned high six figures. We don’t need both of us out there earning all this money.

I consider myself retired. I have my own money. I have family money. We have marital assets. The last thing I need to do is go out and get a job just to have a job. I certainly don’t need to get a job to prove to some internet strangers that I can manage my time.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone contributes to society, what's the difference between raising your children, caring for your parents and managing your household vs doing it for money as an employee?

For me it’s because once kids were in school there was not much “raising kids/caring for parents/managing household “ to do.

I’m always surprised when people say this. I don’t think that my day to day changed that much when my youngest went to school. I just didn’t have my little buddy with me anymore.

I guess I don’t go to the zoo as much, but it’s not like I was spending hours a day playing CandyLand with a four year old before he went to school.

You don't think your day to day changed when you arent responsible for a human for most of the day? That's a huge difference to me!

I’m still ultimately responsible for all of my kids every day.
But yeah, it isn’t that different.
Now I go go book club on Thursday mornings on my own. I don’t have to bring stickers.
When I fold laundry, I listen to an audiobook instead of his little stories, and I have to match the socks myself.
I usually make dinner on my own without my little helper. (There’s too much going on after school to cook then.).

I mostly kind of miss him.

Sounds like you don’t do much of anything.

She cooks and cleans and takes care of her children after school. That’s plenty.

DP here. I have 3 kids in 3 different schools. I basically have 5 hours from last kid drop off to first kid ending school. I work out, shower, run errands, cook, clean up, etc. There isn’t that much time left. I do meet up with a friend for lunch or go to the spa but it is like once per week.

Your time management skills are severely lacking. I guess it's good you don't have to work because it doesn't sound like you'd make it through a day.

So much hate! How do you know that her time management skills are lacking?

You’d put all three kids in the same school, right? Because you’re so brilliant, yeah? That actually sounds lazy to me. Maybe she’s chosen to make her life a little more difficult to put each kid at the best place for that child. She’s doing it because she can and she wants the best fit for all three.

For a third party like me, it’s obvious that you are seething with jealousy that you do not have the resources to send your kids to three different schools.

Ha, ok. My kids are at the private they all want to be at and we're very happy there. So yeah, I have the resources to send them wherever I want. So "obviously" you are wrong.

Someone who has five hours a day and who has no time left after working out, showering, running errands, cooking, and cleaning isn't good at managing their time. You realize that many people do all those things in far less than five hours, right? Again, good thing she doesn't have too much on her plate.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone contributes to society, what's the difference between raising your children, caring for your parents and managing your household vs doing it for money as an employee?

For me it’s because once kids were in school there was not much “raising kids/caring for parents/managing household “ to do.

I’m always surprised when people say this. I don’t think that my day to day changed that much when my youngest went to school. I just didn’t have my little buddy with me anymore.

I guess I don’t go to the zoo as much, but it’s not like I was spending hours a day playing CandyLand with a four year old before he went to school.

You don't think your day to day changed when you arent responsible for a human for most of the day? That's a huge difference to me!

I’m still ultimately responsible for all of my kids every day.
But yeah, it isn’t that different.
Now I go go book club on Thursday mornings on my own. I don’t have to bring stickers.
When I fold laundry, I listen to an audiobook instead of his little stories, and I have to match the socks myself.
I usually make dinner on my own without my little helper. (There’s too much going on after school to cook then.).

I mostly kind of miss him.

Sounds like you don’t do much of anything.

She cooks and cleans and takes care of her children after school. That’s plenty.

DP here. I have 3 kids in 3 different schools. I basically have 5 hours from last kid drop off to first kid ending school. I work out, shower, run errands, cook, clean up, etc. There isn’t that much time left. I do meet up with a friend for lunch or go to the spa but it is like once per week.

Your time management skills are severely lacking. I guess it's good you don't have to work because it doesn't sound like you'd make it through a day.

So much hate! How do you know that her time management skills are lacking?

You’d put all three kids in the same school, right? Because you’re so brilliant, yeah? That actually sounds lazy to me. Maybe she’s chosen to make her life a little more difficult to put each kid at the best place for that child. She’s doing it because she can and she wants the best fit for all three.

For a third party like me, it’s obvious that you are seething with jealousy that you do not have the resources to send your kids to three different schools.

Ha, ok. My kids are at the private they all want to be at and we're very happy there. So yeah, I have the resources to send them wherever I want. So "obviously" you are wrong.

Someone who has five hours a day and who has no time left after working out, showering, running errands, cooking, and cleaning isn't good at managing their time. You realize that many people do all those things in far less than five hours, right? Again, good thing she doesn't have too much on her plate.

I’m guessing that the PP’s schedule looks something like this:

Workout = 1 hour

Half and hour doesn’t cut it for a decent workout.

Shower + make up/dressing = 1/2 hour

If you spend less time, you look disheveled, no matter what. You especially need to blowdry your hair.

Errands = 1 hour

With traffic it’s going to take you an hour to go to the grocery store, the post office, or to drop off unsuccessful on-line purchases at Fed Ex/UPS. Maybe you can do it faster, but that’s how the traffic is where I am.

Cleaning = 2 hours

If you have a 4,000 to 6,000 square foot house with five bathrooms, it’s going to take about two hours a day of maintenance to keep it decent.

Cooking = 1 hour

If you’re preparing healthy meals with lots of vegetables, it takes a lot of time to clean them and chop them up, properly.

I’ve already gone over the five hours here. But I’ll assume some days PP, won’t have errands and that you’ll tell me how good you can make yourself look in under ten minutes. Or how you can chop vegetables in five. I get it. But it looks to me like PP really doesn’t have that much extra time if she’s doing all the things she has to do.

What’s your abbreviated timeline for completing these tasks?

This is an example of poor time management