Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am hearing of an uptick in this sort of thing. I think the best thing one can do is to actually be present in their kids lives. We live ina society where both parents are just too busy. I think it is better if one parent stays home when the kids are teens. This is the most crucial time. Working when the kids are little is fine if you have good help. They need you so much more as teens. If someone cannot be home then drive them to school and know all their friends and keep tabs on what they are doing. Be interested in their lives.

This. Most parents certainly think they know their children, but they really don't have a clue.

I think one parent at home is worth EVERY bit of the financial sacrifice. Children require care that is stable, competent and loving. Very few nannies or daycare workers will love your child the way you do.

Think about it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had my first C-section 8 years ago and the amount of painkillers they gave me was INSANE. I mean - literally I could have sold 1/2 and still had too much! I have been extremely lucky - by my mid 30s I'd never broken a bone, been in a hospital or had any health issues so after that csec, I was pretty traumatized by the pain/recovery. Still, after awhile, I just could not deal with being on the painkillers. The first week I ended up in the ER because I had too much in my system - combo of the strong tylenol + hydrocodone I was taking. They gave me so much gas I couldn't move it hurt so much. They hooked me up to some drug in the ER and I swear that stuff was like heaven - I can def understand how addiction happens. If I had that kind of opportunity to feel like that all the time, I can see why people would take it!

I ended up obviously getting better and then came my second c section 2 1/2 years later. I ended up on my own accord stopping the pain meds because I just couldn't function - it made me so tired - my body apparently does not respond to opioids very well in that all that happens is I fall asleep I'm just not the type that's going to get addicted as a result but I can see if I was another kind of person, there was ample opportunity to do so with how much I had and how willing the Dr. were to give me more if I asked. It was all about pain control they said - whatever it took I should have it was their attitude. After my 2nd, there was no way I could take care of my kids on drugs so for me I relied on advil and that was it. I just couldn't believe the access I had to opiods - again it was way to easy to get that prescription.

In any case, my point is I cannot believe how much I received from the doctors. It was crazy! I just can't imagine any new mother needing that much. I think the medical community really needs to reconsider their protocols and not over prescribe but neither to under prescribe - I think it's very much a matter of having no set protocols in place that contributes to this epidemic.

I find this story, as well as the post above about hospital ratings related to pain management, very disturbing. Why does our society, or at least part of it that includes hospitals (and whoever rates hospitals) have this idea that a patient should experience no pain following surgery? I don't like pain anymore than the next person, but it is part of surgery, injuries, etc. I think it is unrealistic to expect that you should not have some pain after these events. These painkillers are being way, way overprescribed. We are all seeing the consequences of that.

I think until you've experienced truly horrific pain, you may not have a good perspective. Proper pain management is in fact required for recovery. I don't think my friend who just got split from neck to belly button for heart surgery should have to go without adequate pain relief. The real problem is discharging patients with inappropriate prescriptions and types of pain meds.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just a different perspective-

Found our S was using pills that turned into heroin use. We had no idea. I was a SAHM and involved in my kids lives. He hid it well, grades were good but slowly started to isolate and had mood swings which signaled something was wrong. Found out about 5 weeks later just how bad things were. You could have knocked me over with a feather.

We sent him right away to an out of state rehab and he started to get help. Though I am very private my H felt comfortable sharing with close friends and family what was going on. I did not agree but understood that is he was coping.

Turns out once he reached out to others, to tell them what was going on in our family, people literally came out of the woodwork. It seemed like every single person we knew had been affected in some way by addiction. A relative, close friend, sibling...it was so prevalent, scary and really shocking as everyone hides behind this false front that all is well.

Some of our friends that shared with us really shocked us as they were the ones we thought were totally together. It did give us a sense of comfort to know we were not alone and it instantly gave us a group of people with whom to share when we were going through some really rough days.

That was 3 years ago, it was a bumpy ride for about a year (3 rehabs) but today he is back in college and will graduate in about a year. He is applying for dental school and has a wonderful gf who has been so supportive. He has adopted the 12 steps and attends meetings 4 times a week religiously.

We have supported him every step and it was not always east though these meetings he has met what he calls true lifelong friends who have his back and don't judge.

He is a great kid who got lost in the jungle of addiction. It happens to the best of them and recovery IS possible.

He made a conscious choice to use drugs. He did not get lost in the jungle.

NO you are wrong, your ignorance is astounding. He started off with a sport injury and was given oxy. He took it only a few days and unbeknownst to us went to get more (and was given more by dr). The rest is history, it was a quick and furious downward spiral very very fast. When he could not get enough money he was sold/offered heroin.
To reply to another question, he was in private but don't kid yourself it's EVERYWHERE. I can honestly say at his rehab about 70% were just like him, well to do, white privileged, successful families, NOT the picture you expect to see for heroin addiction. It was extremely shocking to me first since I knew nothing about "the drug world" but mostly who it is affecting most.

I want to reiterate to all parents out here, we had NO IDEA. With many kids, you see signs in our sons case, he maintained everything quite well until it was a full blown addiction then we started to see cracks in the veneer. I do not wish this upon anyone but do be wise, be smart and aware. He was the last kid I thought this could happen to, and many others have echoed this same refrain. Top student athlete, had everything going for him.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

People on methadone aren't recovered. They are just addicted to another opiate.

I am pretty sure that the PP wanted to know your opinion about methadone treatment. Unless that's your opinion -- that methadone treatment is bad, because addiction to methadone is still addiction?

I know plenty of people in recovery that traded addiction to drugs to "addiction" to exercise. They don't exercise to the point where it's not healthy, but it still looks like addiction to me. I don't know anything about methadone, but I don't see addiction to something healthy as a bad thing.

Anonymous wrote:
I think until you've experienced truly horrific pain, you may not have a good perspective. Proper pain management is in fact required for recovery. I don't think my friend who just got split from neck to belly button for heart surgery should have to go without adequate pain relief. The real problem is discharging patients with inappropriate prescriptions and types of pain meds.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am hearing of an uptick in this sort of thing. I think the best thing one can do is to actually be present in their kids lives. We live ina society where both parents are just too busy. I think it is better if one parent stays home when the kids are teens. This is the most crucial time. Working when the kids are little is fine if you have good help. They need you so much more as teens. If someone cannot be home then drive them to school and know all their friends and keep tabs on what they are doing. Be interested in their lives.

This. Most parents certainly think they know their children, but they really don't have a clue.

I think one parent at home is worth EVERY bit of the financial sacrifice. Children require care that is stable, competent and loving. Very few nannies or daycare workers will love your child the way you do.

Think about it.

Why can't one work part time, while the kids are in school?

I'm not sure the nanny/daycare thing really applies to teenagers ...

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

People on methadone aren't recovered. They are just addicted to another opiate.

I am pretty sure that the PP wanted to know your opinion about methadone treatment. Unless that's your opinion -- that methadone treatment is bad, because addiction to methadone is still addiction?

I know plenty of people in recovery that traded addiction to drugs to "addiction" to exercise. They don't exercise to the point where it's not healthy, but it still looks like addiction to me. I don't know anything about methadone, but I don't see addiction to something healthy as a bad thing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had my first C-section 8 years ago and the amount of painkillers they gave me was INSANE. I mean - literally I could have sold 1/2 and still had too much! I have been extremely lucky - by my mid 30s I'd never broken a bone, been in a hospital or had any health issues so after that csec, I was pretty traumatized by the pain/recovery. Still, after awhile, I just could not deal with being on the painkillers. The first week I ended up in the ER because I had too much in my system - combo of the strong tylenol + hydrocodone I was taking. They gave me so much gas I couldn't move it hurt so much. They hooked me up to some drug in the ER and I swear that stuff was like heaven - I can def understand how addiction happens. If I had that kind of opportunity to feel like that all the time, I can see why people would take it!

I ended up obviously getting better and then came my second c section 2 1/2 years later. I ended up on my own accord stopping the pain meds because I just couldn't function - it made me so tired - my body apparently does not respond to opioids very well in that all that happens is I fall asleep I'm just not the type that's going to get addicted as a result but I can see if I was another kind of person, there was ample opportunity to do so with how much I had and how willing the Dr. were to give me more if I asked. It was all about pain control they said - whatever it took I should have it was their attitude. After my 2nd, there was no way I could take care of my kids on drugs so for me I relied on advil and that was it. I just couldn't believe the access I had to opiods - again it was way to easy to get that prescription.

In any case, my point is I cannot believe how much I received from the doctors. It was crazy! I just can't imagine any new mother needing that much. I think the medical community really needs to reconsider their protocols and not over prescribe but neither to under prescribe - I think it's very much a matter of having no set protocols in place that contributes to this epidemic.

I find this story, as well as the post above about hospital ratings related to pain management, very disturbing. Why does our society, or at least part of it that includes hospitals (and whoever rates hospitals) have this idea that a patient should experience no pain following surgery? I don't like pain anymore than the next person, but it is part of surgery, injuries, etc. I think it is unrealistic to expect that you should not have some pain after these events. These painkillers are being way, way overprescribed. We are all seeing the consequences of that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

People on methadone aren't recovered. They are just addicted to another opiate.

I am pretty sure that the PP wanted to know your opinion about methadone treatment. Unless that's your opinion -- that methadone treatment is bad, because addiction to methadone is still addiction?

Anonymous wrote:I had my first C-section 8 years ago and the amount of painkillers they gave me was INSANE. I mean - literally I could have sold 1/2 and still had too much! I have been extremely lucky - by my mid 30s I'd never broken a bone, been in a hospital or had any health issues so after that csec, I was pretty traumatized by the pain/recovery. Still, after awhile, I just could not deal with being on the painkillers. The first week I ended up in the ER because I had too much in my system - combo of the strong tylenol + hydrocodone I was taking. They gave me so much gas I couldn't move it hurt so much. They hooked me up to some drug in the ER and I swear that stuff was like heaven - I can def understand how addiction happens. If I had that kind of opportunity to feel like that all the time, I can see why people would take it!

I ended up obviously getting better and then came my second c section 2 1/2 years later. I ended up on my own accord stopping the pain meds because I just couldn't function - it made me so tired - my body apparently does not respond to opioids very well in that all that happens is I fall asleep I'm just not the type that's going to get addicted as a result but I can see if I was another kind of person, there was ample opportunity to do so with how much I had and how willing the Dr. were to give me more if I asked. It was all about pain control they said - whatever it took I should have it was their attitude. After my 2nd, there was no way I could take care of my kids on drugs so for me I relied on advil and that was it. I just couldn't believe the access I had to opiods - again it was way to easy to get that prescription.

In any case, my point is I cannot believe how much I received from the doctors. It was crazy! I just can't imagine any new mother needing that much. I think the medical community really needs to reconsider their protocols and not over prescribe but neither to under prescribe - I think it's very much a matter of having no set protocols in place that contributes to this epidemic.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A takeaway here is parents must take teen pain very seriously.

Opiates after a severe bone break are not inappropriate. But the parent has to control very carefully and take proactive measures to manage any lingering pain. This needs to be discussed with the doctor--no harm on impressing on them the dangers of teen pain because most simply don't get that if they won't it is all too easy for the teen to find things he can self-medicate with.

If your teen complains of pain without obvious cause treat this as a medical emergency. Go see a doctor. If he is dismissive or hints it's all psychological so doing anything will just feed the psychological illness, go to doctor after doctor until you find one that will take it seriously and address it urgently through non-opiate means. At a minimum, this will show your teen you are on their side and you at least are taking it seriously. This helps prevents the despair that causes teens in this situation to turn to drugs.

And all of the above also applies to mental pain as well.

+++++ 10000

We do not accept opiates for a bone break, wisdom teeth, etc.

We throw away all opiates in the house. We don't leave drugs around the house.

If only all parents were as wise.

As far as I know, there is almost nothing out there in terms of popular articles or even more academic works that warns parents about the dangers of teen pain and how it can lead to addiction. Heck, doctors don't seem to know how dangerous it is. For that reason, it is a very hard lesson parents learn after the fact.

Interestingly, there is way more public awareness of mental health problems and addiction potential. We need at least as much awareness for physical pain, especially among those we naturally turn to in these situations, the doctors.

(Messed up earlier post)

The sad this is my sister (her daughter is addicted) asked the doctor to not prescribe opiates. He said, I am not an addiction specialist I treat pain and this is what I recommend.

That is crazy to me. Doctors DO NOT CARE. Their job is to write the script if the person can prove they are in pain, not how much pain. Prove also mean, saying "I am in pain."

We really need to realize doctors are human and many are just in it for the money.

I am not opposed to doctors prescribing opiates to deal with acute pain like you get post op or after a bad break. In fact, it could be cruel not to. But it should be the absolute minimum over the shortest period of time and the doctor needs to make sure the parent is responsible and in charge of keeping them safe and administering them. There should be a campaign to add addiction as a possible serious medical complication of surgery or accidents and doctors should be taught how to prevent this complication just as they are taught steps to take to avoid other complications.

Opiates should not be given for chronic pain. But it needs to be taken just as seriously and doctors faced with a teen with such a problem should 1) try his best to get a diagnosis for the teen (can be very challenging) and 2) from the outset convey to the teen that he takes the pain very seriously and embark immediately on throwing all the non-opiate ways of alleviating pain at the problem. Controlled use of Tylenol/NSAIDs may be appropriate, PT prescriptions should be granted generously--even overly generously, as should prescriptions for things like TENS machines.

There is a shortage of doctors who specialize in teen pain management, but doctors should make every effort to get a teen to one to prevent the complication of addiction. All of this applies to all situations, including those where the doctor would prefer to be an amateur psychiatrist and say the pain is all in the teen's head. As an aside, adults, especially women, get this treatment all the time from doctors, but they have the executive function in most cases to not seek out street drugs. Also adults are far less equipped than teens to actually find the street sources.

Anonymous wrote:A takeaway here is parents must take teen pain very seriously.

Opiates after a severe bone break are not inappropriate. But the parent has to control very carefully and take proactive measures to manage any lingering pain. This needs to be discussed with the doctor--no harm on impressing on them the dangers of teen pain because most simply don't get that if they won't it is all too easy for the teen to find things he can self-medicate with.

If your teen complains of pain without obvious cause treat this as a medical emergency. Go see a doctor. If he is dismissive or hints it's all psychological so doing anything will just feed the psychological illness, go to doctor after doctor until you find one that will take it seriously and address it urgently through non-opiate means. At a minimum, this will show your teen you are on their side and you at least are taking it seriously. This helps prevents the despair that causes teens in this situation to turn to drugs.

And all of the above also applies to mental pain as well.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A takeaway here is parents must take teen pain very seriously.

Opiates after a severe bone break are not inappropriate. But the parent has to control very carefully and take proactive measures to manage any lingering pain. This needs to be discussed with the doctor--no harm on impressing on them the dangers of teen pain because most simply don't get that if they won't it is all too easy for the teen to find things he can self-medicate with.

If your teen complains of pain without obvious cause treat this as a medical emergency. Go see a doctor. If he is dismissive or hints it's all psychological so doing anything will just feed the psychological illness, go to doctor after doctor until you find one that will take it seriously and address it urgently through non-opiate means. At a minimum, this will show your teen you are on their side and you at least are taking it seriously. This helps prevents the despair that causes teens in this situation to turn to drugs.

And all of the above also applies to mental pain as well.

+++++ 10000

We do not accept opiates for a bone break, wisdom teeth, etc.

We throw away all opiates in the house. We don't leave drugs around the house.

If only all parents were as wise.

As far as I know, there is almost nothing out there in terms of popular articles or even more academic works that warns parents about the dangers of teen pain and how it can lead to addiction. Heck, doctors don't seem to know how dangerous it is. For that reason, it is a very hard lesson parents learn after the fact.

Interestingly, there is way more public awareness of mental health problems and addiction potential. We need at least as much awareness for physical pain, especially among those we naturally turn to in these situations, the doctors.

(Messed up earlier post)

The sad this is my sister (her daughter is addicted) asked the doctor to not prescribe opiates. He said, I am not an addiction specialist I treat pain and this is what I recommend.

That is crazy to me. Doctors DO NOT CARE. Their job is to write the script if the person can prove they are in pain, not how much pain. Prove also mean, saying "I am in pain."

We really need to realize doctors are human and many are just in it for the money.