Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this a normal thing? I’ve never heard of it, but a friend posted their daughter’s online today asking for rec letters for rush.

Make sure the Social Resume includes details on Mommy. This is a BIG deal with Southern Sororities…
First we have to know how much of a superficial loser the mom is….
1) Did she marry her husband for money?
2) Are her nails always done?
3) Full make up anytime she leaves the house?
4) Clothing mirrors that of a wannabe socialite? Quiet Luxury is a foreign concept
5) despite never going to a TOP school, the prestige of DD college makes up a big part of her life?
6) Has some connections through daddy or husband and think she belongs

If 5 of those are CHECKS, then yes, you can move on to your own social resume and chances are you are closer to your (mom’s) dream of you making it into the sorority they didn’t….Then WELCOME to the “Find me a husband club”

You've clearly never been to the UES of NYC/suburbs of CT/Boston/ if you think these six criteria apply only to Southern women. The names of the top schools and basic grooming habits (makeup choices/clothing brands) change, but the sentiment is the same. Your value (and your kid's social currency) is based on your family's financial and educational pedigree, looks, and a high HHI.

Spouse choice has and always will matter to you and to your children.

There will always be social competition in private and work life - and "intelligent" people catch on quickly and adapt. It only gets more real and more intense the closer you get to C-suite jobs. If you don't know this, you are probably a teenager with a bad attitude.

No matter how far we’ve come, and all this talk at DCUM about education, t20, t50, 100, teaching quality, etc are all just a nice excuse for women to find a husband with money/connections. Everything else is secondary. The sad part is that this behavior is engrained into these girls heads by their striver mommy……shame shame shame .
You are NO BETTER than AFGHAN, INDIAN or MIDDLE EASTERN families that arrange marriages…

Anonymous wrote:I can only believe that there are actual teenagers responding to this post. The idea that a grown woman would exhibit such immature levels of bias and prejudice against other women is just kind of revolting.

Remember that the anti-hate sign you have in your yard? Well it includes people who get their nails done and have different priorities/cultural identifiers of success than you do.

I do t think so. You should may not be “looped” into these types of things in your everyday life?
Nothing here is surprising to me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So it’s all based on looks and who you know.

Are there any sororities that value intelligence and talents and character and do not give any weight to looks/wealth/connections?

It's chapter specific. The girls pick other girls they think will fit in. I spent a lot of time with my sorority sisters and know many still 40 years later.

I was not great looking. But I did happen to get rushed by someone who went to my high school though we had never met at our huge school. Other than that I had great grades and lots of extra curricular activities.

I ended up at one of the top national houses.

Anyone else want to speak up for the notion that it’s actually not how you look and who you know but who you are that counts?

That’s not how real life works.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this a normal thing? I’ve never heard of it, but a friend posted their daughter’s online today asking for rec letters for rush.

Make sure the Social Resume includes details on Mommy. This is a BIG deal with Southern Sororities…
First we have to know how much of a superficial loser the mom is….
1) Did she marry her husband for money?
2) Are her nails always done?
3) Full make up anytime she leaves the house?
4) Clothing mirrors that of a wannabe socialite? Quiet Luxury is a foreign concept
5) despite never going to a TOP school, the prestige of DD college makes up a big part of her life?
6) Has some connections through daddy or husband and think she belongs

If 5 of those are CHECKS, then yes, you can move on to your own social resume and chances are you are closer to your (mom’s) dream of you making it into the sorority they didn’t….Then WELCOME to the “Find me a husband club”

You've clearly never been to the UES of NYC/suburbs of CT/Boston/ if you think these six criteria apply only to Southern women. The names of the top schools and basic grooming habits (makeup choices/clothing brands) change, but the sentiment is the same. Your value (and your kid's social currency) is based on your family's financial and educational pedigree, looks, and a high HHI.

Spouse choice has and always will matter to you and to your children.

There will always be social competition in private and work life - and "intelligent" people catch on quickly and adapt. It only gets more real and more intense the closer you get to C-suite jobs. If you don't know this, you are probably a teenager with a bad attitude.

Same for Chicago where country club culture and the right private high school dictate social mobility.

Anonymous wrote:I can only believe that there are actual teenagers responding to this post. The idea that a grown woman would exhibit such immature levels of bias and prejudice against other women is just kind of revolting.

Remember that the anti-hate sign you have in your yard? Well it includes people who get their nails done and have different priorities/cultural identifiers of success than you do.

I agree, though at least the women at colleges judging other women for their looks and SM presence, etc. have the excuse that they are young and only following their mom’s lead. The grown women perpetuating the old girls’ network and beauty pageant standards of acceptability have no excuse for their bias and prejudice.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So it’s all based on looks and who you know.

Are there any sororities that value intelligence and talents and character and do not give any weight to looks/wealth/connections?

It's chapter specific. The girls pick other girls they think will fit in. I spent a lot of time with my sorority sisters and know many still 40 years later.

I was not great looking. But I did happen to get rushed by someone who went to my high school though we had never met at our huge school. Other than that I had great grades and lots of extra curricular activities.

I ended up at one of the top national houses.

Anyone else want to speak up for the notion that it’s actually not how you look and who you know but who you are that counts?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this a normal thing? I’ve never heard of it, but a friend posted their daughter’s online today asking for rec letters for rush.

Make sure the Social Resume includes details on Mommy. This is a BIG deal with Southern Sororities…
First we have to know how much of a superficial loser the mom is….
1) Did she marry her husband for money?
2) Are her nails always done?
3) Full make up anytime she leaves the house?
4) Clothing mirrors that of a wannabe socialite? Quiet Luxury is a foreign concept
5) despite never going to a TOP school, the prestige of DD college makes up a big part of her life?
6) Has some connections through daddy or husband and think she belongs

If 5 of those are CHECKS, then yes, you can move on to your own social resume and chances are you are closer to your (mom’s) dream of you making it into the sorority they didn’t….Then WELCOME to the “Find me a husband club”

You've clearly never been to the UES of NYC/suburbs of CT/Boston/ if you think these six criteria apply only to Southern women. The names of the top schools and basic grooming habits (makeup choices/clothing brands) change, but the sentiment is the same. Your value (and your kid's social currency) is based on your family's financial and educational pedigree, looks, and a high HHI.

Spouse choice has and always will matter to you and to your children.

There will always be social competition in private and work life - and "intelligent" people catch on quickly and adapt. It only gets more real and more intense the closer you get to C-suite jobs. If you don't know this, you are probably a teenager with a bad attitude.

Anonymous wrote:I can only believe that there are actual teenagers responding to this post. The idea that a grown woman would exhibit such immature levels of bias and prejudice against other women is just kind of revolting.

Remember that the anti-hate sign you have in your yard? Well it includes people who get their nails done and have different priorities/cultural identifiers of success than you do.

No it doesn't.

"I'm so oppressed!"

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Outside the south:

My daughter has sororities following her already on social media from Michigan. She was following the houses first, then individuals and the houses followed back.

They need to know who you are before August.

And this is fine but having rush consultants and spending an insane amount of time on resumes and curating a specific lifestyle and appearance to look appealing for sororities is crazy

I don't get why the social resume is a big deal. You can Google image it and see in 30 seconds how to make one.

I can only believe that there are actual teenagers responding to this post. The idea that a grown woman would exhibit such immature levels of bias and prejudice against other women is just kind of revolting.

Remember that the anti-hate sign you have in your yard? Well it includes people who get their nails done and have different priorities/cultural identifiers of success than you do.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this a normal thing? I’ve never heard of it, but a friend posted their daughter’s online today asking for rec letters for rush.

Make sure the Social Resume includes details on Mommy. This is a BIG deal with Southern Sororities…
First we have to know how much of a superficial loser the mom is….
1) Did she marry her husband for money?
2) Are her nails always done?
3) Full make up anytime she leaves the house?
4) Clothing mirrors that of a wannabe socialite? Quiet Luxury is a foreign concept
5) despite never going to a TOP school, the prestige of DD college makes up a big part of her life?
6) Has some connections through daddy or husband and think she belongs

If 5 of those are CHECKS, then yes, you can move on to your own social resume and chances are you are closer to your (mom’s) dream of you making it into the sorority they didn’t….Then WELCOME to the “Find me a husband club”

There’s gotta be a reason this is only a thing at southern schools. My daughter’s in a sorority at a big state school outside the South, and to her, the idea that girls would put in the same time, money, and effort into getting into a sorority as they did into getting into college itself is completely wild. Are the boys putting in the same effort when rushing? I mean, are we not in 2025?

Because it’s no different than how they live the rest of their lives.

Social status rules. Old family money rules, but if you’ve lost the family money over the years, you still keep your social status because everyone still knows your family name and that’s what matters more than anything.

What matters:

Who are you? (Note to outsiders, this is not where you say your name, this is where you say who your daddy or granddaddy is - use the family name with the most recognition)

Who do you know? If you are not in one if their social circles, you never will be except possibly at a superficial level.

Conformity is essential. You must look and behave in extremely acceptable and predictable ways. Yes, buy the wedge sandals everyone else has.

It’s good to be smart, but don’t let that interfere with your “sweetness” by questioning authority, religion, or politics. If your intelligence makes you serious or even occasionally depressed, you’re “too smart”, though if will be interpreted as “not sweet.”

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this a normal thing? I’ve never heard of it, but a friend posted their daughter’s online today asking for rec letters for rush.

Make sure the Social Resume includes details on Mommy. This is a BIG deal with Southern Sororities…
First we have to know how much of a superficial loser the mom is….
1) Did she marry her husband for money?
2) Are her nails always done?
3) Full make up anytime she leaves the house?
4) Clothing mirrors that of a wannabe socialite? Quiet Luxury is a foreign concept
5) despite never going to a TOP school, the prestige of DD college makes up a big part of her life?
6) Has some connections through daddy or husband and think she belongs

If 5 of those are CHECKS, then yes, you can move on to your own social resume and chances are you are closer to your (mom’s) dream of you making it into the sorority they didn’t….Then WELCOME to the “Find me a husband club”

LOL….. I know this was supposed to be funny and mean at the same time….But I cant help but agree with the stereotype….

It’s sad in 2025, there are women who still strive for this.

Sorry you didn't get a bid.

Got one, thanks. But sorry that in 2025, you have all your hopes and dreams for your daughter set on getting one.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this a normal thing? I’ve never heard of it, but a friend posted their daughter’s online today asking for rec letters for rush.

Make sure the Social Resume includes details on Mommy. This is a BIG deal with Southern Sororities…
First we have to know how much of a superficial loser the mom is….
1) Did she marry her husband for money?
2) Are her nails always done?
3) Full make up anytime she leaves the house?
4) Clothing mirrors that of a wannabe socialite? Quiet Luxury is a foreign concept
5) despite never going to a TOP school, the prestige of DD college makes up a big part of her life?
6) Has some connections through daddy or husband and think she belongs

If 5 of those are CHECKS, then yes, you can move on to your own social resume and chances are you are closer to your (mom’s) dream of you making it into the sorority they didn’t….Then WELCOME to the “Find me a husband club”

LOL….. I know this was supposed to be funny and mean at the same time….But I cant help but agree with the stereotype….

It’s sad in 2025, there are women who still strive for this.

Sorry you didn't get a bid.

Anonymous wrote:Outside the south:

My daughter has sororities following her already on social media from Michigan. She was following the houses first, then individuals and the houses followed back.

They need to know who you are before August.

And this is fine but having rush consultants and spending an insane amount of time on resumes and curating a specific lifestyle and appearance to look appealing for sororities is crazy

Outside the south:

My daughter has sororities following her already on social media from Michigan. She was following the houses first, then individuals and the houses followed back.

They need to know who you are before August.