DCUM Forum

Anonymous

08/25/2012 21:56 Subject: women who don't work or raise kids

Anonymous wrote:I know several guys now who are recently married and whose wives have promptly quit working upon marriage. I assume because this is in anticipation of having children but none of said wives are pregnant. The men are wealthy but not uber-rich where it might be expected that wives would join socialite class.
Explain to me why you would quit working BEFORE you are even pregnant. Is working THAT bad?

see, you have way too much time on your hands worrying about the lives of others. but oops! i guess that's what this site is all about. carry on...

Anonymous

08/18/2012 10:30 Subject: women who don't work or raise kids

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anyone who puts down SAHMs are just jealous. There is nothing difficult about what OPs problem is. If OP could stay home, she would. But she can't, nor will she ever, and she is pissed off about it and is trying to bully others into their explaining their stance to her; as if they owe her (of all people) an explanation. BS. If I could stay home, I would owe NO ONE an explanation!

I have neighbors like this who are nasty about SAHMs, especially if those SAHMs have a nice demeanor and/or have nicer houses. The jealousy oozes from the WM neighbors. You can almost smell it, it is so very obvious. Grow up, people.

If someone else is successful, it has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with you. Grow up.

read the subject line, please. also, your grammar is atrocious. ANYONE ARE JUST JEALOUS!!
Also, it's not the SAHM's that are successful. It's their husbands.

I'm actually a successful SAHM, just so you know it's possible. I'm good with the kids, highly efficient, run our home, finances and social life, and spend significant time working for two charities and caring for a sick relative. I also used to be a BIGLAW lawyer, then a successful in-house counsel for over 8 years. Just two different kinds of success. Oh, and I brought over $2 million into our marriage (based on my work and investments, not a trust or family gift) and have earned much more since, so don't go thinking it's all my spouse's hard work that bought our home. Good luck with your narrow mind.

But, if you have been earning money you are not really a SAHM.

Anonymous

08/17/2012 22:56 Subject: women who don't work or raise kids

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anyone who puts down SAHMs are just jealous. There is nothing difficult about what OPs problem is. If OP could stay home, she would. But she can't, nor will she ever, and she is pissed off about it and is trying to bully others into their explaining their stance to her; as if they owe her (of all people) an explanation. BS. If I could stay home, I would owe NO ONE an explanation!

I have neighbors like this who are nasty about SAHMs, especially if those SAHMs have a nice demeanor and/or have nicer houses. The jealousy oozes from the WM neighbors. You can almost smell it, it is so very obvious. Grow up, people.

If someone else is successful, it has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with you. Grow up.

read the subject line, please. also, your grammar is atrocious. ANYONE ARE JUST JEALOUS!!
Also, it's not the SAHM's that are successful. It's their husbands.

I'm actually a successful SAHM, just so you know it's possible. I'm good with the kids, highly efficient, run our home, finances and social life, and spend significant time working for two charities and caring for a sick relative. I also used to be a BIGLAW lawyer, then a successful in-house counsel for over 8 years. Just two different kinds of success. Oh, and I brought over $2 million into our marriage (based on my work and investments, not a trust or family gift) and have earned much more since, so don't go thinking it's all my spouse's hard work that bought our home. Good luck with your narrow mind.

Anonymous

08/17/2012 21:41 Subject: women who don't work or raise kids

I was raised in a society like that. Women in my mom's circle and now many of my classmates (who I don't interact with anymore since I live in the US), live like that. The men work, they have a busy schedule going to the gym, socializing, "helping the poor", some of them have kids but they only supervise how the nanny raises her kids. If there is a birthday party this moms take the nannies with them so they can socialize while the kids play and are supervised by all the other nannies. The moms and nannies (and dads if they come) all interact in different groups. It seems like it is from another time but it is now in 2012. I hate going to my country for this reason, women only worry about gym routines, the latest trends in Europe etc.

Anonymous

08/17/2012 18:34 Subject: women who don't work or raise kids

What I want to know is what happens if the husbands decide to leave? I'm a working woman. I pay my taxes along with every other working adult. If the trophy wifes husband leaves them and there are no children, then what? How are they supported? IMO, if you don't work you are not entitled to the public benefits that the rest of us pay taxes for.

Anonymous

08/17/2012 17:48 Subject: women who don't work or raise kids

Anonymous wrote:Anyone who puts down SAHMs are just jealous. There is nothing difficult about what OPs problem is. If OP could stay home, she would. But she can't, nor will she ever, and she is pissed off about it and is trying to bully others into their explaining their stance to her; as if they owe her (of all people) an explanation. BS. If I could stay home, I would owe NO ONE an explanation!

I have neighbors like this who are nasty about SAHMs, especially if those SAHMs have a nice demeanor and/or have nicer houses. The jealousy oozes from the WM neighbors. You can almost smell it, it is so very obvious. Grow up, people.

If someone else is successful, it has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with you. Grow up.

There is one poster (or maybe several) who think that any criticism = jealousy. No, it's not. There are many, many good reasons for highly educated women to have careers, to be financially independent, to have some intellectual stimulation beyond house and home while raising children. Can you possibly fathom that these are valid arguments and not mere feelings of jealousy?

Anonymous

08/17/2012 16:43 Subject: women who don't work or raise kids

A good book on this subject is The Feminine Mistake. Full of food for thought.

Anonymous

08/14/2012 17:23 Subject: Re:women who don't work or raise kids

If being a housewife or SAHM mom were such a great choice, more men would do it. And really, what kind of a "choice" is it if it has to be given to us by a husband? What I really don't get is all the women who write about how their being essentially maids (because that's what it is) enables their husband to thrive at work and relax when he gets home. Seriously? Was this their dream in college?

Anonymous

08/14/2012 17:22 Subject: Re:women who don't work or raise kids

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have half a kid?

Yes.

Someone who has never been pregnant - wouldn't get that.

Umm, someone who's never had a brain wouldn't get that.

Am I missing my brain? Someone please explain to me this concept of telling people you have half a kid.

Seriously? You still don't understand?

NP to this discussion. I'm assuming the 2.5 kids poster is pregnant.

If that's the case, I think this terminology is stupid. I don't tell people I have 1.5 kids b/c I'm pregnant. Sorry I'm not up on all the juvenile shorthand.

I'm the one that posted about 2.5 kids. I said it in shorthand because my being pregnant was irrelevant to the conversation except for the fact that my two kids would soon be three. I've used this terminology exactly once now, but your fixation on it is what's juvenile.